Page 13 of The Lost Kafoozalum

comes.

  I say quick If he is worrying about all that nonsense he talked inorder to distract my attention, forget it; I have.

  Silence, then he says wearily, "I talked nonsense, did I?"

  I say there is no need to worry, under the circumstances anyone wouldhave a perfect right to be raving off his Nut.

  I then find I cannot bear this conversation any longer so I get upsaying I expect he is tired and I will call someone.

  I get nearly to the door when

  "_No_, Lizzie! you can't let that crew loose on me just in order tochange the conversation. Come back here. I appreciate your wish tospare my feelings, but it's wasted. We'll have this out here and now.

  "I remember quite well what I said, and so do you: I said that I lovedyou. I also said that I had intended to ask you to marry me as soon asyou ceased to be one of my pupils. Well, the results of Finals wereofficially announced three days ago.

  "Oh, I suppose I always knew what the answer would be, but I didn'twant to spend the rest of my life wondering, because I never had theguts to ask you.

  "You don't dislike me as you used to--you've forgiven me for makingyou come to Russett--but you still think I'm a cold-bloodedmanipulator of other people's minds and emotions. So I am; it's partof the job.

  "You're quite right to distrust me for that, though. It is the dangerof this profession, that we end up by looking on everybody andeverything as a subject for manipulation. Even in our personal lives.I always knew that: I didn't begin to be afraid of it until I realizedI was in love with you.

  "I could have made you love me, Lizzie. I could! I didn't try. Notthat I didn't want love on those terms, or any terms. But to useprofessional ... tricks ... in private life, ends by destroying allreality. I always treated you exactly as I treated my otherstudents--I think. But I could have made you think you loved me ...even if I am twice your age--"

  This I cannot let pass, I say "Hi! According to College rumor youcannot be more than thirty-six; I'm twenty-three."

  M'Clare says in a bemused sort of way He will be thirty-seven in acouple of months.

  I say, "I will be twenty-four next week and your arithmetic is stillscrewy; and here is another datum you got wrong. I do love you. Verymuch."

  He says, "Golden Liz."

  Then other things which I remember all right, I shall keep them toremember any time I am tired, sick, cold, hungry Hundred-and-ninety--;but they are not for writing down.

  Then I suppose at some point we agreed it is time for me to go,because I find myself outside the cabin and there is ColonelDelano-Smith.

  He makes me a small speech about various matters ending that he hearshe has to congratulate me.

  Huh?

  Oh, Space and Time did one of those unimitigated so-and-sos, my dearclassmates, leave M'Clare's communicator on?

  The colonel says he heard I did very well in my Examinations.

  Sweet splitting photons I forgot all about Finals.

  It is just as well my Education has come to an honorable end, because ...well, shades of ... well, Goodness gracious and likewise Dear me, I amgoing to marry a _Professor_.

  Better just stick to it I am going to marry M'Clare, it makes bettersense that way.

  But Gosh we are going to have to do some re-adjusting to a changedEnvironment. Both of us.

  Oh, well, M'Clare is a Professor of Cultural Engineering and I justpast my Final Exams in same; surely if anyone can we should be able towork out how you live Happily Ever After?

  * * * * *

 
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