He let out a tired sigh as he looked at her. "I know. I'm an animal."
Kiara shook her head. "No, you're not. You were too merciful."
He frowned at her.
She offered him a smile and patted Jana's shoulder. "I'm beginning to understand your world, Nykyrian. I'm not going to judge you for it."
As soon as they were on the street and had put enough distance between them and the alley, he pulled Jana to a stop. "What were you doing there?" he demanded of the boy in a firm, yet gentle voice. "You should know better."
The boy swallowed. "I didn't do nothing, Nykyrian, I swear it on my life. I was minding my own business when they jumped me and dragged me into the alley. I tried to fight them off, but they were too big."
Nykyrian's stern face softened. "How many times have I told you to be careful? You have to stay away from Paraf Run. Have you any idea what could have happened to you had I been five minutes later?"
"I know and I listened. It's just . . ." His blue eyes misted. "Me mum died two days ago, and they threw me out of her brothel. The authorities want to take me to an orphanage or to a League academy. And I ain't doing that shit. Paraf Run is the only place where the enforcers don't patrol for bastards to arrest. Have you any idea what they do to boys in those places? I promised me mum when she died that I wouldn't let them take me."
There was a subtle tightening to Nykyrian's features that made her wonder what ghosts tormented him. "It's all right, Jana. I won't let them do that to you."
A lump choked Kiara's throat as she watched the tender way he directed the boy down the street in front of them.
Jana hesitated. "Where are you taking me?"
"To a friend's place where you'll be safe."
Jana gave him a suspicious glare. "How do I know that?"
"You have my word."
Jana nodded as if that was all he needed.
Kiara watched the two of them. While it was obvious they knew each other, she wanted to know how. Had Nykyrian been a client of Jana's mother? While the thought didn't thrill her, it wasn't really any of her business.
"So how did you two meet?"
Jana flashed a sheepish grin at her. "I tried to pick Nykyrian's pocket last year."
She gaped at Nykyrian. "And you let him live?"
There was a subtle lifting at the corners of his mouth. "I have an age requirement before I kill someone."
Jana slowed down so that he could walk beside her. "He actually bought me dinner, then took me to me mum and told her to keep me off the streets. Not that she listened. She was a whore."
Nykyrian's features tightened, and when he spoke, his tone was sharp. "Your mother loved you, Jana. One day you'll understand how rare a thing that is. Don't disparage her memory by reducing her down to the occupation she had that kept you fed and clothed. She deserves better than that."
Jana's anger deflated as he lowered his head. "Sorry."
Kiara studied Nykyrian as they walked. His ability to assess people still amazed her. And even though he was an assassin, he had an astonishing amount of compassion.
They walked in silence as he led them through a small alley to the back of an office. He removed his shades and knocked on the rear door where they waited until an elderwoman appeared. With dark brown eyes and black hair laced with gray, she was heavyset and beautiful.
"Nykyrian," she breathed happily, pushing open the screen door to look him up and down like a mother seeing her son after a long absence. Yet she made no move whatsoever to touch him.
That alone told Kiara exactly how familiar she was with Nykyrian and his habits.
He stood back to indicate her and Jana. "Hi, Orinthe. May we come in?"
"You know you're welcome here any time." She opened the door wider.
Nykyrian stood back and allowed Kiara to enter first. The elderwoman led her through an immaculate storeroom of foodstuffs and into a small lounge to the right. Jana looked at the food with such longing, it made Kiara want to cry for him.
Nykyrian directed Jana to one of four brown leather chairs that encircled a small, round table. Orinthe reached up on a shelf and brought out a bowl of fruit and a covered plate of pastries.
With a tender smile, she set it before Jana, who eagerly tore into it. A strange look crossed Orinthe's face as she watched Jana shove an entire pastry into his mouth. "He reminds me of another boy I knew a long time ago." She glanced over to Nykyrian. He didn't respond at all.
Orinthe went to get a glass of milk for the boy, who was doing his best to inhale the food. Kiara's heart wrenched as she thought of how many times in her life she'd joked she was starving when she really had no concept of the hunger Jana knew.
The hunger Nykyrian had endured . . .
When Orinthe sat down, Nykyrian met her gaze. "His mother died and he has no place to live. I was wondering--"
"I could use help here in the office. My regular errand boy quit three days ago to go off and run with one of the local gangs, and I haven't had the time to look for another. There's a room for him upstairs."
Jana looked up from his food, his eyes wide. "Stay here?" he asked in awe. "With all this food?"
Orinthe's bright smile warmed Kiara's heart. "Are you willing to work for it?"
He narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "Are you going to cheat me?"
Orinthe glanced at Nykyrian. "He's just like someone else I know." She smiled kindly at Jana. "No, child. I've never cheated anyone in my life. As long as you do a little work and don't steal, you're welcome here and I'll make sure you have as much food as you can hold."
Jana beamed.
Orinthe cleaned up the remains of the food. "Nykyrian, would you mind showing him upstairs to the guest room and get him cleaned up a bit?"
"Sure." He helped Jana carry the rest of his fruit out of the room.
Once they were gone, Orinthe turned her attention to Kiara with a probing stare that told her she wouldn't be able to hide anything from the elderwoman. "Are you Nykyrian's woman?"
Kiara shook her head. "No. We're just friends."
Orinthe narrowed her gaze. "I've never seen him so relaxed with anyone else--he actually allowed you to stand at his back, and he seldom considers anyone his friend. It's a term he's never taken for granted and it's something he doesn't offer lightly." She wiped a damp cloth over the surface of the table, removing the crumbs Jana had left behind in his eagerness to eat his fill. "What's your name, child?"
"Kiara."
Her smile widened. "A name as beautiful as the one who bears it."
"Thank you."
Orinthe folded the cloth and set it on the table before them.
Kiara watched the kind elderwoman, a thousand questions swirling in her mind about Nykyrian. "How do you know Nykyrian?"
Orinthe bit her bottom lip, then stood and closed the door to the stairs where Nykyrian had taken Jana. She returned to her chair, motioning for Kiara to lean closer to her. "He can hear from long distances, you know?"
"Yes, I do."
Orinthe leaned in so that she could speak in the lowest possible whisper. "I was the psychologist Commander Quiakides hired after Nykyrian's adoption to . . ." She paused as if seeking the right words. "Nykyrian had a lot of trouble adjusting."
"How do you mean?"
Tears misted in her eyes as she swallowed audibly. "I've been a child therapist and psychologist for almost sixty years, and I've seen some of the worst cases you can imagine. Things that would make you ill to even hear about. Yet none of them haunt me the way his case does. The things that were done to him . . ." She blinked back tears. "He's a good man. I don't know how someone like him emerged out of the horrors of his past, but he did."
She glanced at the stairway. "If you are his friend, you have no idea how lucky that makes you. Nykyrian has trouble bonding to people."
"I don't understand."
"Because of the way he was abandoned and treated, he doesn't trust people at all. He doesn't even open up much to me. He's afraid to let
anyone know him for fear of their rejecting him as his parents did. Because of that inner fear, he rejects others before they have a chance to hurt him."
Kiara scooted closer. "I've noticed that he never talks about his childhood."
"I don't blame him." Orinthe toyed with the cloth on the table as if she needed the distraction to speak. "He was thrown into a human orphanage where he was only allowed garbage for nourishment. The workers there feared giving him meat. They thought the taste of it might drive his Andarion blood into a feeding frenzy and so they . . ."
Orinthe winced as if the horror of it was too much to bear even now. "He drank out of toilets. And then when he was taken into the commander's home . . . they weren't any better to him. Sometimes I think it was even worse because the commander and his children were trying to kill the last human part of him." She sighed heavily. "The commander even put a training collar on him. Do you know what those are?"
"I've seen them, but I don't really know how they work."
"They can lock down the entire nervous system so that a person can't move--or more to the point, defend themselves. You can feel, but you can't move. They also have a shocking device. They're the worst kind of torture. But the commander demanded it, and so . . ."
Orinthe wiped a trembling hand over her face. "The commander never listened. I can still remember arguing with him when he sent Nykyrian to school. I knew it was too soon and . . ." She shook her head. "That poor boy used to sleep on the floor, underneath his own bed in their home."
"Why?"
"For protection. The commander's sons used to sneak up on him in the middle of the night to beat him. So he learned to stay up for days and still does. He only sleeps when he absolutely cannot go another moment without it."
Kiara finally understood. She remembered what he'd said to her when they met. "Because when he sleeps, he's vulnerable."
Orinthe nodded. "I'll be honest, I told the commander to put him down for his own good. Given the horror of his childhood, I didn't think there was any hope for him at all. But that was what the commander wanted. A killing machine incapable of human feelings."
Kiara was horrified that the woman before her had actually called for Nykyrian to be killed. "Why would you want him put down?"
"You have no idea what he was like back then. He was so fierce as a child. He would attack without stopping until someone overpowered him. And then one day as I was observing him in a park while he did his homework, a small child came up and hit him for no reason. I was terrified and tried to get to them. I was sure he'd kill the child before I could reach them. But instead, Nykyrian looked up and stared at the child, and did nothing. As soon as I reached him, the child ran off and when I asked Nykyrian why he didn't attack, he looked at me blankly and said the child wasn't old enough to know better. Then he went back to his reading as if nothing had happened. It was then I knew that somehow, against all odds and against everything my books had told me about psychology, he understood right and wrong. I realized then that when he attacked it was to protect himself. He doesn't attack out of anger or maliciousness."
"He attacks out of necessity."
"Exactly."
And he understood who would be a threat later and who wouldn't. Like Syn had said. It was why Pitala and the bullies in the alley had been spared.
But Kiara was still trying to reconcile what she'd seen in the video with the man she knew. "What about the commander's wife? Did she--"
"I always felt sorry for her. I could tell she wanted to help where Nykyrian was concerned, but every time she tried, her sons and husband would mock her for it. In the end, she wasn't much better off than Nykyrian was, and so she tried to stay out of things as much as she could. But she wasn't the worst to hurt him . . ."
CHAPTER 19
Kiara opened her mouth to ask Orinthe more, but Nykyrian returned.
He stood beside Orinthe's chair. "Jana's taking a nap."
"Good," she said with a tender smile. "I'll let him sleep until dinner."
Nykyrian inclined his head to her. "I'll transfer funds to your account for him."
Orinthe sputtered at his words. "You'll do no such thing. Heaven knows you already give me more than enough as it is. Even if it is for the children, you're too generous."
For a moment, Kiara thought he actually blushed. "Thank you for taking Jana in. If he gives you any trouble, call me and I'll talk to him."
"I have a feeling he won't be a problem."
Nykyrian held his hand out to Kiara. She didn't hesitate to take it.
A frown covered Orinthe's face. "You're not leaving now?"
He nodded before replacing his shades. "If you need anything, call me or Syn and we'll take care of it."
Orinthe sighed in a way that made Kiara think Nykyrian's words embarrassed her. She looked up at Nykyrian and her friendly, warm smile returned. "You take care of yourself and this pretty lady. The two of you make a handsome couple."
Kiara smiled at the gentle woman. "Thank you."
By Nykyrian's face, Kiara could tell the compliment made him uncomfortable. "I'll check on the two of you in a couple of weeks."
Orinthe nodded and showed them to the door.
Nykyrian led the way back down the street. Kiara knew by his rigid spine that something was bothering him.
"What's wrong?"
A tic worked in his jaw. "I wish Orinthe hadn't told you what she did about me."
Was there anything that ever got past this man's hearing? "I wish you'd told me yourself."
Nykyrian hesitated and looked down at her. Kiara wished he didn't have his shades on so she could read his emotions.
After a moment, he shifted. "Why do you want to know about my childhood? I prefer not to think about those days. They're gone and forgotten."
Kiara shook her head in denial. "It's not forgotten, Nykyrian. Horrors like that don't just fade. Take it from someone who knows. No matter how hard we fight, no matter how hard we try, they sneak up on us and drag us back with a clarity that is as vibrant as it was when they first happened. I like to pretend my past isn't there, too, but it doesn't change the fact that I still can't stand to be alone in the dark."
Nykyrian paused as her words touched him. The fact that she understood . . . It made him feel close to her. But it didn't change the pain he carried with him. "I would never leave you in the dark."
"And I feel the same toward you."
The smile she gave him weakened his knees and made him feel the stirring of something he didn't even want to contemplate. Unwilling to think about that, he took her to the large shopping complex at the end of the street.
Kiara gaped at the dizzying variety of colors and merchandise that blended with shoppers from all cultures. The store they entered had huge glass counters filled with accessories and trims--any and everything a person could possibly want. Clothing styles were hung over abstract mannequins, showing how they might look on various life-forms.
As she browsed, she realized the clothes here were obscenely priced. Even her extravagant father would faint over these. She stepped back from the rack. "Is there another place to buy clothes?"
"Don't you like them?"
She widened her eyes as she leaned into him to whisper. "Did you see the price?"
Nykyrian snorted. "I'm more than capable of supplying you with several wardrobes from here."
"But--"
"But nothing, mu Tara. Start shopping."
Kiara bit her lip in agitation, unwilling to give in so easily. No one needed clothing that cost this much. "This really isn't--"
"Kiara," he growled low in his throat. "Buy clothes or go naked. Personally, naked works for me."
How could she be both annoyed and amused by him? "Fine. When you're homeless and bankrupt, remember I tried to stop you."
A smile curved his lips.
Stunned, she stood there unable to move as she saw the one thing she'd never thought to see from him. A real, full-blown smile. The man was absolutely gorgeous.
"My God, you have dimples."
His smile vanished instantly. "I know."
"No, no, no, no, no!" she said, reaching up to touch his cheek. "Don't you dare hide those. They're beautiful."
He dodged her touch. "They look stupid."
She let out an aggravated breath. "They are sexy as all get-out. Trust me. Dimples like those will definitely get you laid."
That almost succeeded in making him smile again . . . At least until they were interrupted.
"Kiara Zamir!"
Kiara turned around to face an excited salesclerk. The young woman stared at her with huge, animated brown eyes.
"Oh my God, I love you!" she gushed. "I saw Silent Prayer last year and thought it was the best thing ever produced. You are the best."
Kiara grinned, warmed by the compliment. "Thank you."
"My name's Terra and whatever you need, just let me know. Oh my God. I can't wait to tell my mother, she'll never believe this!" And Nykyrian had been right. Unlike on Gouran, Terra didn't judge or react to him. No wonder he was willing to pay so much. Here he was normal.
Kiara glanced at Nykyrian to see how he was taking the clerk's continuing adoration. He watched them quietly, his features patient and his stance unobtrusive. Oh, thank goodness he wasn't chafing like other people, including her father, did. He seemed completely content to stand in the background and let her have time with her fan.
That meant a lot to her.
She allowed the clerk to take her by the arm and show her a variety of pieces. For all the generosity of her father, Kiara realized she'd never seen such extravagant materials. Each piece was light and airy with the most delicate, silky texture.
Terra explained many of the fabrics were from non-human worlds, brought to the store only by an exorbitant price. She glanced over her shoulder, unsure how much Nykyrian was willing to spend on her clothes.
"I like that one," he said, indicating the dress Terra held.
Kiara cringed. It was absolutely stunning, but . . . "I don't know . . . it's the GNP of a small planet."
He let out a slow, aggravated breath. "Don't worry about the price, princess, just buy whatever you need."
Terra smiled at him. "Ooo, I like you. If you're not counting coins, I have an even better line in back."
At his nod, Terra moved them to the exclusive section.