I pulled away and flipped her onto her stomach. I gripped her hips up in the air and split her legs wide so I could get to her from on my knees. She was stunning. Totally spread for me, anticipating and accepting and off-the-charts perfect.
My hand on my shaft, I slid the head around her drenched sex, working it over her clit again and again, getting her closer to coming and my cock well lubed.
“Mmm hmm,” I groaned, centering the bell end against her tight hole. “You are something so fucking perfect…” I pushed and penetrated just the tip of my cock, trying to open her up a bit, and thought I could easily lose it. As in ejaculating before I ever got inside her.
She tensed and arched from my invasion so I eased up immediately, putting my palm on her lower back to steady her. “Easy…relax for me, baby.” She stilled and breathed heavy, waiting on me, submitting to my desires; so perfectly takeable and gloriously tight with her muscle gripping around the head of my ready-to-blow cock. I didn’t want to hurt her, but my God, what a spectacular turn-on to be poised like I was, about to claim that final place where I could meld into her.
She quivered beneath me. “You’re about to make me come, baby. I want to so badly, but you first. I’m gonna make you feel so good!”
“Ethan, please make me come!” She squirmed against my just tipped cock ready to take me all the way. I realized she would allow me in even if it was painful because she was such a generous lover.
Saints help me!
It took everything I had not to sink into that stretched, mysterious part of her I had yet to claim. I wanted to. I needed to. But I wanted and needed to cherish her more. I knew I would hurt her and she was nowhere near ready. We’d have to work up to it—something to look forward to. Like any new thing we did together. I was out of my fucking mind right now and this was not the moment to push her into anal for the first time with me.
“Brynne…I love you so much,” I whispered against her back, notching my cock down to find her pussy. The flesh was so hot it burned when we touched. I heard my own shout when I slammed deep inside her and started to fuck. My hands on her hips gripped tight, knocking her back hard onto my shaft, again and again and again, the sounds of our bodies slapping amid grunts of pure pleasure took over from there.
We were at it for a long time. I needed that terrorized dream out of my system and fucking was a way for me to make that happen. If you can fuck then you are alive—the brutal logic was fairly hard to dispute there.
It was pretty rough shagging too, even for us. And Brynne could take it rough from me. She had before and she would again because I’d never let her go. Never. I couldn’t imagine doing the things I’d just done to her with anyone else. I knew I wouldn’t be able to.
I understood later in the dark, after the crazed sex trip I’d dragged her on, and after she fell into a deep sleep beside me. She’d come so many times she just passed out from exhaustion once I could finally bring myself to stop. She never asked me to stop though. My girl gave herself to me and didn’t press for answers. And I was glad because I didn’t want to talk about any of it yet. My insides were far too raw after my nightmare.
I wanted to light up but denied myself. It felt wrong in regards to her. It was wrong to subject her to my unhealthful smoking and I wouldn’t do it around her anymore.
Watching her sleeping after that session, her methodical breathing, her long lashes resting above her cheekbones, her hair swirling wildly over the pillow, completely took my breath away. I knew I had found my angel at last and I would hold onto her with everything I had.
No more yielding but a dream…
She saved me from the utter madness of my torment. She made me want things I’d never wanted before. I would kill if I had to in order to keep her safe. It would kill me if anything ever happened to her.
Eventually I was able to fall asleep again and it was only because she was right there with me.
9
I woke up to an empty bed and an empty flat, and an authentic nightmare. After what happened in the night, the last thing I expected was for Brynne to be AWOL on me.
My first clue that something wasn’t right came when I rolled in the bed and kept going. No soft, warm body smelling of flowers and the decadent shagging from last night to press against and wrap myself around. Just sheets and pillows. She wasn’t in my bed. I called out her name and got only ominous silence back. I began to feel sickening dread.
Last night too much for her?
I checked the bathroom first. I could see she’d used the shower. Her cosmetics and brush were out on the vanity but she was definitely absent. Not in the kitchen making coffee, not in my office checking her emails, not working out in the gym, not anywhere inside the flat.
I pulled up the security camera video on a monitor that recorded the front door and hallway. Anyone coming or going would be on it. My heart pounded so hard my chest had to be visibly moving. I rewound the last hour and there she was, dressed in joggers and trainers heading for the lifts, headphones stuck in her ears.
“Fuck!” I screamed, slamming my hand down on my desktop. Out for a morning run? Un-fucking-believable. I blinked at what I was seeing and scrubbed a hand over my beard.
“Tell me you’re on her right now!” I shouted into the direct line to Neil.
“What?” He sounded like he was still laid up in bed and I felt more ill than before.
“Wrong answer, mate. Brynne’s left the flat. On a run!”
“I was sleeping, E,” he said. “Why would I be tagging her if she’s in the flat with you—”
I hung up on Neil and called Brynne on her mobile. It went to voicemail of course. I almost threw mine at the wall but I managed to text her with: WTF RU?
I ran to my closet, threw on some clothes and shoes, grabbed car keys, wallet, mobile, and bailed down to the garage. I tore out onto the street, tires squealing, and started calculating how far she could have gone in the time since she’d been tracked on security cam, my mind running wild with scenarios of how easy it would be for a professional hit to take her out at this hour and make it look like an accident.
It was early, just past seven, a typical overcast London morning coming alive for the day. The usual delivery vans and street vendors moving about, the neighbourhood coffee house doing a brisk business, a few early morning runners getting their workout in, but not the one I was looking for. She could be anywhere.
I kept coming back to why she would take off without telling me. I was scared shitless it was because of me. What she’d seen of me last night. What had happened after… I was in so far over my head with Brynne it was laughable. God knows we both have our issues but maybe that cluster fuck of emotions last night was more than she wanted to put up with. I rubbed my chest and kept driving.
My mobile rang. Neil. I put him through the audio in-car speakers.
“I’ve not spotted her yet. I’m on Cromwell now, heading south but I think I’ve traveled further than she could’ve made since the time stamp on security cam.”
“Look, E, I’m sorry.”
“You can tell me that after I find her.” I was angry but it wasn’t his fault. Brynne had been with me and Neil was technically off duty. My fault. What a fucking mess.
“I’ll head east then. Lots of joggers follow Heath Downs by the park.”
“Do that, mate.”
I kept scanning, praying for the sight of her when a text came through: Ur up. Gettin coffee. What u want me 2 bring u?
How about your sweet ass at home, woman!
The relief absolutely brought me to my knees in gratitude but I was so very angry at her for this stunt. Out getting bloody coffee! Sweet Christ! I pulled over immediately and just rested my head on the steering wheel for a moment. I so needed to set her down and explain a few things about how her life would have to change over the next few months. And that solo morning runs were definitely off the menu.
Bugger me!
My fingers shook as I texted: Which coffee shop?
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A short pause and then: Hot Java. R U mad???
Ignorant question.
The coffee shop she named was the one not more than a block from my flat. We’d even gone there together a few mornings when she’d stayed the night with me. Brynne had been right close to home the whole time! I texted back: Don’t leave!! Comin 2 get u!
It took at least ten minutes to navigate the roads back to my neighbourhood. I was angry at myself—for several reasons, but mostly for sleeping through her waking up and leaving without my knowledge. I’d been in such a rush going after her, I’d passed right by her in the coffee shop, and that was just unacceptable. I was slipping.
I decided to put the reasons for my deep sleeping aside for the time being.
Nightmare from hell and resulting shag-a-thon, maybe?
Oh, I knew it’d be dredged up again in conversation at some point, probably soon, because Brynne would ask me, but right now I was just too raw to face what was bubbling up with my subconscious. Denial looked so much more attractive.
Fuck me running! Pun intended.
Fucking hell, if she wasn’t in the shop like I’d told her to be but out on the sidewalk holding two coffees! And she wasn’t alone either. Some bloke was all over her, chatting her up, who knows who the fuck he was to her. Somebody she knew? Or someone feeling her out for God only knows what purpose! She was so getting spanked for this stunt when I got her alone.
I had to park on the opposite side of the road and then cross. She spotted me approaching and said something to her companion who looked over at me. His eyes flared a bit and he sidled up closer to her.
Wrong fucking move, asshole.
“Ethan,” she said, smiling as if this were a perfectly acceptable way to start the day.
Oh, my darling, we very much need to have a talk about things.
“Brynne,” I said tightly, pulling her into me at the waist and getting a good, long look at her friend, who needed to be on his merry way like ten minutes ago. The guy was a little too bold for my tastes, standing there like he was entitled to be talking to her, like he’d done it before and had history with her. Shit! He knew her. This man knew Brynne.
“Ethan, this is Paul Langley, umm…a friend from the art department. He teaches… I was just leaving and there was Paul coming in.”
She was nervous. Brynne looked uncomfortable and if I was good at anything, it was reading people. I could smell the unease coming off her. Now the bloke was a different story. He looked far too smug and a bit too entitled, which was how I figured it out.
Brynne seemed to catch herself and said, “Paul, this is Ethan…Blackstone, my boyfriend.” She handed me one of the coffees. “I got you a misto.” She looked at me and took a sip from her cup. Yep. She was uncomfortable.
The plonker stuck his hand out and offered first.
I hate you.
I had one arm around Brynne and the other hand occupied with the coffee she’d just palmed off on me. I had to let her go in order to shake. I hated him in his slick suit, professional, clean cut and from all appearances plenty of brass. I unwound my hand from around Brynne’s waist and accepted his grip. I squeezed firm and tried not to think about how bloody awful I looked which was exactly like I’d just fallen out of bed.
“A pleasure,” Langley said, not meaning it.
I returned the briefest nod. It was the best I could do and I didn’t really give a shit whether I was being rude or not. He was a bloke in the wrong place at the wrong time to ever be a friend of mine. I loathed him on sight.
His eyes flicked over me. I decided I would be the one to end this handshake first. Or pissing contest as it were.
I withdrew my hand and pressed my lips to Brynne’s hair, but kept my eyes on him as I spoke. “I woke up and you were gone.” I drew my arm back around her.
She laughed nervously. “I just felt like a white chocolate mocha this morning.”
“You still need your morning coffee, I see. Some things never change, eh, Brynne darling?” Langley grinned conspiratorially at Brynne and in that instant I knew. He’d fucked her. Or tried his best to. They had some sort of history and I could only see the red rag of jealousy being dangled in front of my eyes. Holy fucking hell, the violent emotions that washed through me in those seconds. I wanted to show Langley the way down to the sidewalk face first with my fist, but I needed to get her away from him even more.
“Time to go, baby,” I announced, pressing my hand at her back.
Brynne stiffened for an instant but then gave in. “It was so nice to see you again, Paul. You take care.”
“Same to you, darling. I’ve got your new number and you have mine, so you know where to find me, all right?” The bastard looked at me and there was no mistaking the challenge in his gaze. He thought I was some sort of meathead and was throwing out a dare to me that if Brynne needed rescuing she had only to call and Prince Charming would come for her.
Sod. Off. You. Pathetic. Prick.
Brynne nodded and smiled at him. “Goodbye, Paul.”
Yeah, bugger-off…Paul.
It was so apparent that Lover Paul did not want to leave her. He wanted to kiss her or hug her in some show of an affectionate farewell but had brains enough not to try it. I didn’t say he was stupid, just my enemy.
“I’ll call you. I want to hear all about the Mallerton.” He did a hand to the ear gesture. “Bye, darling.” He gave me a look and I gave him one right back. I truly hoped he could read minds because I had so much worth saying that he really needed to hear.
You cock-swinging, worthless shit bag! You will absolutely NOT call her to talk about the Mallerton. You won’t look at her and you won’t think about her either! Got it?! My girl is NOT your darling now, nor will she ever be in future. Get out of my sight before I’m forced to do something that will land me into a fuckload of trouble with MY girl.
We started across the street, my heart pounding, the anger just pouring out of me, when she opened her mouth.
“What in the hell was all that back there, Ethan? You were incredibly rude.”
“Keep walking. We’ll discuss this at home,” I managed to grit out as we crossed.
She glared at me like I’d grown a second head and stopped on the sidewalk. “I asked you a question. Don’t talk to me like I’m a child who’s in trouble!”
“Get in the car,” I snapped, trying to keep from picking her up and setting her in the seat, which was dangerously close to happening even if she didn’t know it yet.
“Excuse me, but this is bullshit. I’m walking back!” She flounced away from me.
I wanted to explode I was so pissed. I grabbed her hand to keep her from leaving. “No, you are not walking back, Brynne. Get in the car now. I’m taking you home.” I spoke low and right into her face where I could see her angry eyes flashing up at me. She was so stunning when she was riled. She made me want to drag her into my bed and do very naughty things to her body for about a day and a half.
“I’m not being ordered by you. Why are you acting like this?”
I closed my eyes and called for patience. “I’m not acting at all.” People were looking at us. Could probably hear our conversation too. Bloody hell! “Would you please get yourself in the car, Brynne?” I forced a fake smile.
“You are being such a prick, Ethan. I still have a life. I am going running in the mornings and can stop at the coffee shop if I want to.”
“Not without me or Neil you aren’t. Now get your sweet Yank ass in the motherfucking car!”
She stared at me for a moment and shook her head, eyes blazing daggers at me. Her chin lifted imperiously before she stomped over to the Rover and got in. I ignored her behavior, thinking I was being pretty damn magnanimous in the circumstances. I texted Neil to let him know I had her and made her wait on me while I did it. She was locked inside the car and couldn’t go anywhere for the moment at least.
I looked at her. She looked at me. She was angry with me. I was beyond enraged with her.
>
“Don’t, you ever do that again,” I told her in no uncertain terms.
“What, walk? Buy a coffee?” She pouted and looked out the window. Her mobile lit up and buzzed. She looked over at me as she accepted the call. “Yes, I’m fine, Paul. I apologize for whatever that was, but no worries. Just a little lovers spat.” She actually smirked at me as she told that puffed up cocksucker I was having a bad day.
I wanted to rip the mobile out of her hands and throw it out the window, and I probably would have if she had not turned it off and put it away in a pocket. “You know what I mean, Brynne, and don’t fucking mock me to him!”
“You embarrassed me back there, Ethan! Paul thinks you are—”
“I don’t give a maiden queen’s first fuck what that cocksucker thinks. What is he to you anyway?”
“He’s a nice guy and a friend.” She wouldn’t look me in the eye when she said it and I knew. Oh fuck did I know!
“Did you let him fuck you, Brynne? Has he knowledge of that fanny of yours that was just made for shagging? Has he had his hands all over you, his cock inside you? Hmmmm? I really want to know. Tell me about you and nice guy Paul.”
“You are such an asshole right now.” She folded her arms beneath her breasts and looked forward out the windscreen. “I’m not telling you anything.”
“Did you fuck him!?”
She shifted in the seat and gave me a look that made pain shoot up my cock. “Who did you nail last before you turned your sights on me, Ethan? Who was that lucky girl? I know it couldn’t have been more than a week past when we got it on for the first time!” She started waving her hands in gestures. “Said the guy who thinks a week is a long time to go without some sex!”
Well shit!
That wasn’t a nice thought because she was right. I hated to admit it, but I couldn’t tell her the name of the last one who’d been able to get me up for it. Pamela? Penelope? Something with a P… Ivan would know, he had a long list of female friends and he’d introduced us. I scowled at the realization that I couldn’t really remember, and the fact that whoever she’d been, hadn’t made her, or the shagging any more memorable than the letter of her name.