to lead somewhere. I’m going to be finishing my undergraduate requirements next year. My life is going to be changing pretty soon with law school approaching. I’m looking for something a little more permanent.” He sighs, running a hand through his damp hair. “That sounds creepy, doesn’t it? I barely know you. I’m not talking marriage. I just mean…I need to start thinking about the future.”
That doesn’t sound creepy at all. It’s like he read my mind. “Okay,” I say.
He smiles uncertainly. “Okay?”
“Yeah,” I confirm. “Let’s go get something to eat.”
He holds out his hand and I take it, letting him help me from my seat. We stand chest to chest for several seconds as he looks down at me.
“That was easy.”
He says it jokingly, but something about his statement bothers me. I’m not even sure what exactly, so I brush it off. I refuse to find faults in everything he says. I won’t be my mom. I’m going to give this a real shot.
10
A Dustland Fairytale
Chase
I should be swimming. I should be having fun. Instead, I’m pouting in the corner by myself, watching Annie and Loden like some fucking stalker. I force my gaze away. It’s not my business.
But he better be good to her.
Guy stops in front of me, hands on his hips as he pants. He’s grinning like a lunatic. “Dude, that’s fun as hell.” He nods toward the high dive, shaking water from his head, and I chuckle.
“Cannonballs are always a party favorite.”
He nods distractedly. “Why aren’t you in the pool? You invited me to this thing.”
I scratch my head, smoothing out my hair. “I’m people-watching.”
He sits down beside me, bringing one knee up to rest his arm on. “Who we looking at?”
My gaze flicks to Annie quickly before moving on. I point at Ella Hamilton, sitting on the side of the pool with a few other girls. She’s laughing, kicking her feet through the water, careful not to get too wet. Girls like Ella won’t actually swim because they don’t want to mess up their hair and make-up. They aren’t here for the pool part of the party.
“I thought she hated you for putting the moves on her dog,” Guy says. I look sideways at him. His shoulders are shaking with his silent laughter. “What kind of dog was it anyway?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. It was one of those little yippy things.”
“Like a Chihuahua?”
“Yeah, I think so. That’s the Taco Bell dog, right?”
“Uh-huh. So, small, yappy, taco-loving dogs get you all hot and bothered?” He’s laughing again, loudly this time, and I try not to smile.
“Shut the fuck up.” I shove him hard with my hip, sending him off the bench. “That shit’s like a stigma now. Ella and her friends run—literally run—in the opposite direction when they see me.”
Guy rests his head against the wet floor and grabs his stomach, laughing harder. “Annie deserves serious props for that one,” he says. He sits up quickly and gestures to the pool. “Come do cannonballs with me?”
“Are you sure? You wouldn’t rather lie on the floor laughing at me for a little while longer?”
He cocks his head to the side, thinking. “Nah, I’m good. There’s plenty of time to laugh at you later.”
I stand up, kicking his shin as I step over him. “Someday you’re going to feel bad about the way you treat me.”
“Possibly, but not today.” He holds his hand out and I help him up. “Maybe tomorrow, though.”
He heads toward the high dive and I follow. We have to walk past Ella on the way, but I’m not paying attention to her. My focus is on Annie. She’s standing in between Loden’s legs as he sprawls out on the bench. She’s still dressed, so I guess they’re not swimming. Her head lifts just as I pass by and she smiles.
I’m not used to getting smiles from Annie. I like it.
Guy stops and I almost walk into his back. I follow his gaze to Ella and her friends, still sitting along poolside. He moves up behind them and squats so that he’s right next to Ella’s head.
And then he starts barking.
All four girls jump, startled, and slide into the deep end. Before they have time to resurface, Guy ushers me forward.
Laughter from behind me catches my attention because I recognize it immediately. Annie’s hand is over her mouth, and she’s trying so hard to calm down. Her eyes are watering with the effort.
I grin and point at her. “You started it.”
She shrugs. “Worth it,” she calls. “That is some funny shit.”
I cock a brow and exchange a look with Guy. We take two steps toward Annie and she throws her hands up, palms out. “Wait. What are you doing?”
Guy smiles at her and I’m impressed at the level of deviousness he puts into it. There’s no way she doesn’t know exactly what’s coming.
“Stop,” she yelps. She glances back at Loden for help, but he’s laughing. “Don’t you do it Guy Handlin,” she demands, but her tone is pleading. She steps sideways, moving around Loden’s legs. She’s going to run. Guy realizes it at the same time I do. We both lunge at her, but she slips past us and takes off.
I don’t chase after her and I put my hand out, stopping Guy from pursuing her as well. Probably one of the only rules I actually take seriously—don’t run on the wet floor around a pool. That and don’t dive in the shallow end, but that’s just common sense.
“Annie.” I say her name, trying to warn her, but it’s already too late. Her feet slip out from under her and she falls backward.
Now I run. I slide onto my knees next to her and she looks up at me, her eyes blinking quickly. “You okay?” I ask. My hands hover above her as I await her reply.
She puts her hands over her face, but doesn’t answer me.
Guy and Loden kneel on her other side. I tug on her wrists, trying to pry her hands away from covering her face. “Annie, are you hurt?”
“Just my pride,” she groans. “How many people just saw me fall on my ass?”
Guy looks over his shoulder and shrugs. “Pretty much everybody here.” He looks at me. “What would you say? Thirty, maybe forty people?”
“Give or take,” I agree.
“Ahh,” Annie sighs.
“But,” Guy announces, “that was some funny shit.” She glares up at him, not missing the way he uses her same words.
Loden helps her stand and there’s applause around us. Nice. Annie’s cheeks redden and she covers her face again.
“I need to go home,” she says, her voice muffled behind her fingers.
“What?” Loden says. He puts his hands on her waist and she drops her hands. “Annie, I have to stay. This is my team’s party.” He wiggles her hips from side to side and smiles. “It wasn’t that bad. Nobody cares.”
“I know. I just…” She takes a deep breath and sighs. “You stay, but I’m going to go. My back kind of hurts. And I need to study anyway…” She trails off and Loden’s eyes search her face.
“All right. You sure?”
She nods and waves her hand. “Positive.”
“We’ll walk her back,” I tell Loden.
“Thanks, man. I appreciate it.” He leans in and kisses Annie on the cheek. “I’ll call you later.”
I put my hand on her elbow and steer her toward the door. She pauses, looking up at me.
“Don’t you need to change or get shoes at least?”
“I’m fine. I’m coming right back.”
Guy holds the door open and we step out into the cool night air. The three of us walk in silence. I want to bombard Annie with questions about her and Loden. Three days ago they were just going dancing and now they seem like a couple.
Huh. Guess you can’t believe rumors floating around a college campus. Like guys that use girls for sex or are into bestiality.
“How’s your back?” I ask. I feel responsible for making her run, which makes me feel like shit.
“It’s fine.
I just wanted out of there.” She tucks a loose hair back behind her ear and shrugs. “Loden wouldn’t have understood.”
I don’t know what a normal response is to that. But I’m thinking it sounds messed up. She’s allowed to leave a party whenever she wants. She doesn’t need to make up an excuse to go.
“What’s going on with you two?” Guy asks. He leans forward to look around me at Annie. “You together?”
She lifts the end of another strand of hair and examines it. “Yeah. I guess so. We’ve hung out the past three nights.”
“He seems nice.”
Annie smiles at him and nods enthusiastically. “He is. I like him a lot. He’s smart and funny. And he’s so…” She shakes her head, her smile growing bigger. “I like being around him.”
Ugh. Fuck. I want to cover my ears and start humming the Star Spangled Banner as loud as I can. I don’t need to hear her talk about this shit.
We stop in front of her building and I wave my hand. “Well, here you are. I’ll see ya.”
“Thanks for walking me home,” she calls after me.
I shoot my hand up to let her know I heard her, but keep walking. I don’t even remember Guy’s with me until he clears his throat.
I glance over at him. “That’s weird, right?”
“What?” he asks.
“Nothing. Never mind.”
Guy’s gaze is glued to my face, looking for something.
I smirk at him. “I cannot believe you barked at Ella. That was probably the funniest thing I’ve ever seen.”
He chuckles softly. “I just figure if she’s going to run away every time she sees you, she might as well have a reason.”
I shake my head. “It’s scary how evil your mind can be.”
“Pft. That was nothing. Just wait until I come up with the Mac-Daddy of plans to get Annie back for spreading that shit.”
“It’s cool. I already took care of it.”
He glances at me with a knowing grin. “What’d you do?”
I huff out a laugh and rub my forehead. “I made some dude think she had crabs.”
Guy bursts out a cackle of laughter that echoes off the surrounding buildings. “And you think my mind’s scary.”
11
All in Your Hands
Annie
I stopped asking Chase for my music back weeks ago. I’ve decided to live with it. Partially because some of his songs have grown on me. And partially because I have full intentions of replacing all of the music on his iPod. Revenge is a real bitch.
I noticed he likes to leave his account open on his laptop. And he takes his laptop with him the evenings he swims after classes. He leaves it in his locker while he does laps, along with his iPod. It wasn’t difficult to figure out his combination. It’s the same one he used all through high school. It’s almost too easy.
The only part I’m having a difficult time with is deciding whether to load my music on it or if I should fill it with country. Chase cannot stand country music.
I swing my feet from my perch on the bench as I watch Loden sway just under the surface of the water. He moves like a fish, sliding gracefully across the pool. It’s almost hypnotic. I could watch these guys swim all day.
I sigh and return my attention to my book, trying to work these math problems out. If I can get this out of the way, I’ll have the rest of the evening to spend with Loden.
The last few weeks have been great, but we don’t get as much time together as I’d like. Between my studying rituals and his practices, we’re lucky to get an actual date in. Most nights are spent just like this. At the pool. I work on homework while he trains. I’m not complaining because I appreciate his commitment. I just wish I were a little bit higher on his list of priorities. But our relationship is still new. I can’t expect him to change his life around for someone he’s been seeing for such a short amount of time.
“Whatchya doing?” Chase says in my ear, causing me to gasp at his unexpected proximity.
“Jesus,” I pant, my hand covering my speeding heart. I swing at him, trying to slap his arm, but he steps back, chuckling. “It’s not funny. You gave me a mini heart attack.”
He runs his hand over his bare stomach. My eyes follow the movement before I glance up at his face. He grins at me, fully aware I was checking out the hard plains of the six-pack he has going on. Freaking swimmers and their hot, swimmer bodies.
I feel my cheeks burn and know I’m blushing. I shouldn’t be embarrassed. These guys are all walking around wearing next to nothing. The whole swim team wears Speedos. It’s impossible to not look at all the skin they show. But somehow it feels different with Chase.
At least he wears trunks. He’s just too beautiful to be walking around all wet and tucked into a tight, barely-there Speedo. Even with the tattoos from bicep to wrist, and his hair constantly changing colors, he’s still incredible to look at. Almost like a piece of fine crafted art. Not anything I’d buy, but something I enjoy viewing from time to time.
My gaze somehow managed to trail right back down over his toned stomach while I was lost in my thoughts. I flick my eyes up to his face and he smirks.
“You done?”
“You’d think there’d be more to look at with all the laps you swim,” I sigh as if I’m disappointed.
“Good thing you have a boyfriend for staring at,” Chase replies.
Now that he mentions him, I turn my attention to the pool, searching for Loden. He’s out of the water and talking to some of the guys while he towels off. I know I shouldn’t, but I compare him to Chase. Only his body because Loden is way ahead of Chase in all the places that matter. Like intelligence and drive. He has a sure future. Where Chase is heading straight to his parents’ basement.
But… I shiver, despite the heat of the room. Loden falls short in the looks department when you stand him next to Chase. Don’t get me wrong, Loden isn’t ugly. Not even close. In fact, I’m sure there are plenty of girls that would find him more appealing than Chase.
I’m just not one of them.
But that doesn’t matter. I’m not with Loden for his looks.
Chase snaps his fingers in front of my face. “Earth to Annie.”
I shove his arm away and glare up at him. “What?”
“I know I’m good looking, but you’re making me uncomfortable, checking me out right in front of your boyfriend.” Chase crosses his arms over his chest and sighs dramatically. “I’m not on display. There is so much more to me than this sexy body.”
I can’t help the startled laugh that escapes. “Sorry,” I say softly. “I got lost in thought for a minute.”
He scrunches his lips and nods. “It’s cool. You’re not the first girl I’ve wowed into speechlessness.”
“Bored,” I correct. “You bored me. Not wowed. And I’m never speechless.” I toss my hair over my shoulder and stand up. I start gathering all my work, placing it inside my bag.
“When you get all defensive like that, it just makes me wonder what you’re trying to cover up.”
I turn around so he can see me roll my eyes. “I’m not being defensive. It’s called honesty. I thought we called a truce?”
“We did. I haven’t called you a bitch since that day. I mean, I’ve thought it a couple of times, but I haven’t actually said it out loud once.”
I raise my hands in front of me and then just let them fall, smacking my thighs. “Ugh.”
“It’s all right if you want me—most girls do. Your secret’s safe with me.”
My entire face ignites because there is some truth to his words. I can’t tell if he knows it or not, but I know it, and that’s enough.
“Never mind.” His brows draw together and he frowns at me. I step around him and he takes my hand.
“You know I’m just messing with you.”
I look down at my hand wrapped in his for several heartbeats. His hand feels so different from Loden’s. Warm. Rough. Callused from the many hours spent playing his bass. Another shiver runs
over my spine and I pull away.
“Unless I’m not,” he adds, his narrowed eyes searching my face.
I press my lips together and shake my head. “I have a boyfriend. You shouldn’t mess with me that way.”
He lets out a harsh breath and nods his head slowly. “Got it. Won’t happen again.”
His words feel like a slap to the face. The thought of him not messing with me burns just as much as when he messes with me. I pivot on my heel and walk as quickly as I can to the locker room to find Loden.
~*~
I push the door open slowly and announce my arrival. I’m not trying to catch anyone mid-change. I hear the shower running, but get no answer, so I move inside slowly. The locker area is empty, so I sit on a bench and wait for Loden to finish up.
My gaze keeps heading over to Chase’s locker—number twenty-two. But I’ve lost all desire to hack his iPod. Instead, I pull out my book and continue to work on my homework.
I just finish the final problem when I hear the squeak of the shower faucet and then silence.
I clear my throat. “I’m in here,” I call out.
Loden comes around the corner, a towel wrapped around his waist. He looks at me for a moment, his eyes narrowed, before quietly opening his locker. I wait while he fishes around inside, but as he begins dressing without a word, I stand up.
“I finished my homework,” I say, turning around to give him privacy. I stare at the wall, still waiting for some response from him.
I get nothing.
“Did you want to do something? Maybe go to a movie? Or we could rent one if you’d rather do that.”
Still nothing.
The rattle of the metal locker slamming shut startles me. I turn around slowly. Loden walks toward me, his gym bag over his shoulder and his hands on his hips. He stops a foot away, his gaze never wavering.
“What the hell was that?”
I shake my head, clueless. “What?”
He laughs one of those dry, not ha-ha funny laughs, but pissed off, breathy