Page 9 of Once Upon a Crime


  “Mommy!” a small child cried as he pointed at Puck’s cocoon. “I want that for Christmas!”

  Sabrina snickered to herself, imagining the stinky sac underneath a Christmas tree. She would love to see Puck’s face when he crawled out of it only to find a weird little boy staring at him.

  “So, did Oz say what he does at the store?” Daphne yelled above the crowd.

  “No, but I’m sure if we ask, someone will help us find him,” Granny Relda said. “He’s a bit of a character. Everyone must know him.”

  “I found him,” Moth said, pointing at one of the many huge picture windows that ran along the sides of the block-long building at Herald Square. There was Oz behind the glass, working on a window display featuring several elves who were supposed to be assembling toys in a red-and-green factory. The elves were robots, run by electricity, yet they moved like human beings, laughing, waving, and pounding away on their toys. One, however, had obviously gone haywire. It was pounding on its robot brethren. Oz stood nearby, aiming his silver remote at the malfunctioning elf. A throng of people pressed against the window, watching the wizard work on the remarkable creations and giggling at his troubles. Sabrina glanced down the street and noticed that there were similar crowds ogling the other windows, which featured scenes from The Night Before Christmas, A Christmas Carol, and The Nutcracker. Each window display was more magical than the last. Sabrina remembered that L. Frank Baum, the man who had written about the land of Oz, had described the Wizard as a mechanical genius, able to create realistic, even frightening illusions. He was so talented, he had once convinced the entire country of Oz that he was a powerful sorcerer.

  Granny maneuvered through the crowd and tapped on the window. Oz turned with an irritated expression, which disappeared when he spotted her. He waved for her to come inside and then climbed out of the back of the window display.

  The group squirmed their way into the bustling store, where Oz met them. He shook their hands and then ushered them into a room marked STAFF ONLY. What Sabrina saw inside was even more amazing than the window displays. The room was filled with half-finished figures, many blinking and buzzing, waiting for their moment in the spotlight. Robotic birds sat on perches singing sweet little songs, and a family of half-painted polar bears played with a newborn cub in the corner. They looked so real it was hard not to get nervous around them. There were also stacks of papers and old engineering books lying about, a full-length mirror leaning against the wall, and a cot sitting in the far corner. Sabrina suspected the Wizard slept in his workroom more often than not.

  “I’m sorry I’m so frazzled,” Oz said as he offered everyone a seat. “Today is ‘what-happened-to-the-rest-of-the-year?’ day here at the store. You’d think people might realize there are three hundred sixty-four days to shop before Christmas.”

  “We were admiring your windows,” Granny said. “The displays are extraordinary.”

  Oz picked up a robot head. It blinked at him and smiled. “Yes, well, it’s the closest thing I’ll get to real magic. I used to be a first rate slight-of-hand man back in the day. When I first found myself in Oz, I did a trick for the Mayor of Munchkinland and before I knew it, I was the Great and Terrible Oz! Unfortunately, there isn’t a lot of demand in New York City for a guy with that title. I tried my hand entertaining at kids’ birthday parties, but video games put an end to that, of course. When I heard about this job, I jumped at it. I always had a knack for mechanical things. Now I create illusions with circuits instead of my hands.”

  “They look almost real,” Daphne said.

  “Thank you,” Oz replied. “They’re like my children. In fact, if I can’t get that elf in the window to behave I’m going to have to put him in time-out. Now, I know you all didn’t come down here just to admire the decorations. How goes the search?”

  “We’ve got a suspect,” Daphne said.

  Oz raised an eyebrow.

  “Cobweb,” Granny said.

  “That can’t be,” Oz said.

  “Oberon told us,” Daphne added.

  The Wizard raised both eyebrows.

  “It’s a long story,” Granny said. “We believe Cobweb’s been working with a group called the Scarlet Hand.”

  “That mark they found on Oberon,” Oz said.

  Granny nodded. “Can you pass this information on to Mustardseed? He may be in danger from Cobweb, as well.”

  “Of course,” Oz said.

  “Unfortunately, that brings us to another dead end. We don’t know where to find Cobweb. He’s not still at the Golden Egg, is he?”

  “No, all but Titania, Mustardseed, and his men have scattered.”

  “Did he have any friends?” Granny Relda asked.

  The Wizard shook his head. “He was pretty busy following Oberon and Titania’s orders. He was very loyal to them. That’s what makes this all such a big surprise. Still, there might be someone who can help. There’s a fairy godmother over in west Midtown who I’ve seen with Cobweb. If he needs a place to hide, he might head there. Her name is Twilarose. She owns a dress shop.”

  “That’s a big help,” Daphne said.

  “By the way,” Oz said. “Between me and you, your friend, the chubby guy …” “Mr. Hamstead?” Sabrina asked.

  “Yes. He’s made himself a powerful enemy today. Word is he stole Tony Fats’s girlfriend. If I were him, I’d get out of town as fast as possible. The fairy godfathers aren’t people you mess around with.”

  Twilarose’s Fashion Emporium was on the corner of Eleventh Avenue and Fifty-seventh Street next to a parking lot for garbage trucks. The smell on the block was even worse than the one coming from Puck’s cocoon.

  Granny had left word at the hotel for Mr. Hamstead and Bess to meet them at the fairy godmother’s store. They arrived soon after the Grimms and Moth, though they were so caught up in conversation, they barely noticed the family waiting for them in the fading daylight. Granny pulled the couple aside and gave them Oz’s warning. Bess looked concerned but Mr. Hamstead just smiled and reminded Granny Relda that he was more than capable of taking care of himself and Bess, if need be.

  While the grown-ups talked, Sabrina looked at the store’s window display and decided that this Twilarose person wasn’t exactly sure what the word fashion meant. The dresses were so ruffled and brightly colored that the mannequins wearing them looked embarrassed.

  “So what’s the difference between a fairy and a fairy godmother?” Daphne asked Moth.

  The little fairy sneered. “Of course an ignoramus like you wouldn’t know the difference. Fairy godmothers and godfathers are lower beings. Unlike true-blood fairies, they need wands to perform magic. And they are born as adults, sometimes as very old people. They can be painfully ugly, with their gray hair and wrinkles.”

  “It must take great strength on your part to tolerate them,” said Granny Relda, who had caught the end of Moth’s speech.

  “It does,” Moth said, nodding earnestly.

  “Well, we don’t know this Twilarose and if she’s hiding Cobweb she might be dangerous,” Hamstead said, pulling his pants up over his belly. “Be careful and keep your eyes peeled.”

  A fat, orange tomcat lay outside, blocking the entrance to the store. Granny shooed it away and it raced shrieking into an old refrigerator box someone had dragged out onto the sidewalk.

  Inside the shop, they found racks and racks of shiny, poofysleeved ballroom dresses, covered in frills and lace. There were also several shelves of shoes in shocking, unnatural colors and funky-shaped handbags.

  A roly-poly lady stepped out of the back room and approached the group. She had a big, blue beehive hairdo atop an almost perfect circle of a head. Her eyebrows were drawn on and her cheeks and lips were bright pink. She was wearing a baby-blue satin dress that made it look as if she might be off to her senior prom at any moment. A rhinestone belt with blue-and-green blinking lights completed the look.

  “Welcome to Twilarose’s Fashion Emporium. How can I help you?” the wom
an sang. “We’re having a sale on spring-fling formal wear and shoes. It’s never too early to get a head start on the coming seasons. And remember, everything in this store is a Twilarose original. I design everything myself.”

  “So you’re Twilarose?” Granny asked.

  “The one and only,” the old woman said. “Perhaps you’ve seen my work on the runways of Milan, Paris, and Canton, Ohio.”

  “The Wizard of Oz sent us,” Daphne said.

  “We’re looking for Cobweb,” Granny Relda added.

  Twilarose’s eyes grew wide. “Indeed. Oh my! I didn’t recognize you, the Grimm family,” she said louder than necessary. “I’m so glad none of you people in the Grimm family were hurt in that mob scene at the Golden Egg. Terrible, terrible situation. I’m so thrilled to meet the Grimm family”

  “Well, I guess we know he’s here somewhere,” Sabrina said. The woman was obviously trying to warn Cobweb of their arrival.

  “I’m not sure what you’re talking about, you people in the Grimm family! I just make clothing. In fact, I feel inspired. I’m going to give you all the Twilarose VIP Makeover! Won’t that be fun?”

  Twilarose reached into the folds of her dress and produced a magic wand. She waved it in the air and there was a loud bam! When Sabrina looked down, she was wearing a puffy, leopardprint dress with matching shoes. She looked over at the others and saw their clothes had been replaced as well. Daphne had on a rainbow-colored can-can dress and Granny Relda was wearing a big pink gown with a hat as large as her whole body. Moth and Bess were both dressed in tracksuits covered in little golden bells and had snowshoes on their feet. Each of the women had so much makeup on, it looked as if it had been applied with a paint-ball gun.

  Poor Mr. Hamstead was wearing an electric-blue tuxedo with tails and a top hat. Even Puck’s cocoon had been made over, in different colored ribbons.

  Twilarose clapped her hands. “I am brilliant!” she shouted. “You all are going to be the toast of New York City.”

  “Underling, we don’t have time for this nonsense,” Moth said.

  “Oh no! You don’t like the outfits. Maybe something more work-appropriate? I’ll fix you lickety-split!” The fairy godmother waved her wand again and bam!—the dresses were gone, replaced with outfits that were even more outrageous. Now, each of the women was wearing a long evening gown that had a badge, handcuffs, and a billy club swinging from it. Mr. Hamstead was dressed in a black-and-white prison uniform and had a ball and chain around his left leg. He looked down and grunted.

  “Genius!” Twilarose said, and then shook her head. “But the makeup is all wrong.”

  Bam!

  Sabrina turned to the mirror. She looked like a geisha from outer space with white pancake makeup and silver lipstick.

  Bam!

  Now she was wearing fake vampire teeth and a beanie cap with a propeller on top.

  Bam!

  Sabrina looked down to find she was carrying a toy poodle with a diamond collar, and she herself had two purple shiners and some of her teeth had been blackened out.

  “No, maybe it’s the shoes,” Twilarose said.

  Moth stepped forward and waved an angry finger at Twilarose. “I am a fairy and a member of the royal court, making me your superior, so if you are quite finished with your atrocious fashion show—”

  “Atrocious?” Twilarose cried. She flicked her wrists and before anyone could stop her, they were all bound from head to toe in thick steel chains.

  “It has been a long time since the glory days of Cinderella but I’d hardly call my work atrocious.”

  “Whoa, whoa, whoa!” Daphne cried. “You’re Cinderella’s fairy godmother?” She tried to free her hand so she could insert it in her mouth.

  “Yes, she’s what made me a fashion design icon. After that dress every princess from here to Timbuktu would have killed for one of my designs … but those were the good old days,” she said sadly.

  “Enough!” Moth roared as she wiggled out of the chains that bound her. “Your blabbering is wasting our time. If you don’t tell us where Cobweb is I’ll—”

  “There is no need for threats, Princess,” a voice said from behind the curtains at the back of the store. The drapes were pulled aside and Cobweb stepped through.

  “Murderer,” Moth screamed.

  “You are confused,” Cobweb said. “I have killed no one!”

  “We know you did it!” Sabrina said. “We heard it straight from Oberon.”

  “I am innocent,” Cobweb said, slightly confused.

  Just then, there was a tremendous crash and the front door to the shop blew off its hinges. The group struggled to see what had caused the commotion. Standing in the doorway were Tony Fats and Bobby Screwball. Their magic wands were held tight in their huge hands.

  “How did you find us?” Bess cried.

  The two goons ignored her. Their eyes were trained on Mr. Hamstead.

  “You shouldn’t have messed with my girl,” Tony Fats said as he and his partner stepped into the store. “‘Cause now, you and me … we’re going to have to settle this the way we did back in Faerie.”

  Tony Fats raised his wand and, with a flick of his wrist, a bolt of white-hot energy rocketed toward the group.

  amstead leaped out of the way and the blast missed him by inches. Unfortunately, it crashed into a rack of polyester dresses that exploded into flames.

  “My spring collection!” Twilarose shouted as she desperately tried to put out the fire that was melting her gowns. She stomped feverishly on a pink, hoop-skirted prom dress, completely ignoring the peril of everyone around her.

  In the chaos, Sabrina watched Cobweb fly out of the shop.

  “Forget the dresses!” she cried, as flames rapidly spread throughout the store. “Get us out of these chains.”

  Twilarose turned and flicked her wand. The chains vanished, freeing the group. Unfortunately, smoke was filling the room, and Tony Fats and Bobby Screwball, who seemed to be having trouble seeing, were shooting their wands in every direction. Bobby seemed to have particularly bad aim; each blast from his wand spiraled toward a random target.

  “Now I know why they call him Bobby Screwball,” Sabrina said as she rushed to rescue Puck’s cocoon from a nest of smoldering feather boas. She scampered over to her family, who were hiding behind a rack of capes.

  “Where’s Cobweb?” Daphne cried.

  “He got away,” Sabrina said, ducking her head to avoid a blast. “We need to get out of here, too!”

  “Bess!” Tony Fats bellowed as he fired again. “You’re my girl now and always.”

  “They’re blinded by the smoke! They aren’t expecting any of us to fly out,” Sabrina said, handing Moth Puck’s cocoon. “Get him out of here.”

  “My pleasure,” the fairy girl said as her wings sprang from her back and lifted her off the ground. She zipped in between the fairy godfathers’ wand blasts and soared out the open door to safety. With so much smoke in the air, Tony and Bobby hadn’t even noticed Moth fly by.

  “Ernie, take my hand,” Bess said. She reached behind her back, pushed something on her backpack, and suddenly a flame shot out that lifted her and her chubby new boyfriend right off the ground. Sabrina was stunned as she watched them rocket out of the store.

  “Uh, I want one of those,” Daphne said.

  Twilarose hurried out next, stumbling over a stack of tiaras before making it to the door.

  “Our turn!” Sabrina cried. She snatched Daphne and Granny by the hand and raced across the room. By this time, Bobby and Tony seemed to have gotten wise to what was going on. Their shots came more quickly and the Grimms had to race at full speed to get to the exit. But just as they reached the door, Daphne pulled away and raced back the way they had come, scooping something off the floor and then rejoining her family.

  They tumbled out into the street, gasping for air, while Tony and Bobby continued to fire their wands obliviously inside the store. It was amazing they didn’t hit each other.
r />   Sabrina rubbed the soot out of her eyes and scanned her surroundings. Twilarose was gone, but Sabrina spied Cobweb flying down the street. “There he is!”

  “We’ll never catch him on foot,” Granny said, whirling around in search of a taxi. She knocked into a woman carrying grocery bags.

  “Did you see that?” the woman cried, staring down the street at Cobweb. “That man is flying, like an angel.”

  Granny nodded, reached into her handbag, and then blew forgetful dust all over the woman. Her eyes glazed over.

  “You had a very boring day,” Granny said.

  “I did,” the woman replied.

  “Wait a minute!” Daphne cried. She reached up and felt around in the woman’s grocery bag.

  “What are you doing?” Sabrina asked, eyeing the doorway nervously. Bobby and Tony weren’t going to stay in the store forever.

  “I need something … like a pumpkin,” the little girl explained, then yanked out a long green zucchini. “I hope this is close enough.”

  Sabrina watched Daphne place the zucchini on the ground and then take a long, thin piece of wood out of her pocket—it was Twilarose’s magic wand.

  “She dropped this,” the little girl explained.

  “Liebling, you have no idea how to use that,” Granny said.

  “I watched her. It’s all in the wrist,” Daphne said.

  Daphne flicked her wrist and a bolt of energy shot out of the wand and hit the zucchini. There was a blinding flash and when Sabrina’s eyes adjusted, she looked down. The zucchini was still there.

  Daphne shook the wand vigorously. “I think it needs new batteries.”

  But in seconds the zucchini began to change. It grew in size and shape, morphing and twisting, creating wheels, hubcaps, headlights, and more. When the transformation was complete, the investigators were standing in front of an emerald-green car, complete with sunroof, spoiler, and whitewall tires.