Page 18 of Secrets


  She leaned forward to try to hear what they were saying, but beyond a murmur of two male voices, she could hear nothing. After a few minutes, they walked away from the boat and disappeared into the trees. Cassie ran after them, trying to see where they were going, but they seemed to have vanished. There were three cabins close together, and each one had lights on inside it, so they could have gone into any of them. She wondered if they were meeting other people.

  “A hotbed of activity,” she murmured. It was just that she had no idea what kind of activity. If it was serious, why didn’t Jeff go to the police? Why didn’t he call someone to help him with whatever he was doing that made him sneak about during the night?

  She waited awhile but heard or saw nothing, so she walked to the boat and looked inside it. It was just an ordinary outboard boat, but it had a big pile of canvas-covered boxes in the back. She looked around again and saw no one. Cautiously, she walked to the edge of the dock and leaned toward the boat, wondering what was under the canvas.

  She couldn’t reach it. She looked behind her again. Nothing. Cautiously, she stepped into the boat and lifted the corner of the canvas. All she saw were wooden crates. They were nailed shut, but there was writing on the far side. She lifted the canvas higher and leaned in closer to see the words, but she couldn’t make them out in the dark.

  In the next minute, she heard a noise and figured it was Jeff returning. Her first instinct was to run back to the cabin so he wouldn’t catch her there, but she was tired of hiding. She sat down on the side of the boat and waited.

  14

  “ WHAT THE HELL—!”Jeff said when he saw her sitting there. “I told you I wanted you to stay in the cabin.”

  “But I didn’t want to stay in the cabin. Would you mind telling me what you’re up to?”

  “It’s just some private business. Boring stuff.”

  “All right,” she said, her back stiff as she got up and started walking toward the cabin.

  “Okay,” he said and caught her arm. “I apologize. I know I’m being rude, but there are things—”

  “That I know nothing about,” Cassie said with a sigh. “I bet your friend Leo is glad he no longer has to wear that big pad over his stomach. By the way, how old is he really?”

  There was a flash of shock across Jeff’s face. “You’re certainly clever, aren’t you?”

  “I have lots of hidden talents.”

  Jeff laughed. “Leo is fine. In fact, before he left, he asked me if you were dating anyone. You can add him to the string of men you’ve been attracting lately.”

  “I’ll see if I can fit him into my schedule. No, wait! My schedule is full of taking care of your father and your daughter and your house and your —”

  “I get the picture. Come on and I’ll walk you back to the cabin.”

  “Then you’ll dump me there and leave me? If you were going to get rid of me why didn’t you leave me with Brent and Skylar?”

  “To be eaten alive by her?”

  Cassie glared at him.

  “Okay, so maybe you can hold your own against her. By the way, she still mentions that jacket you burned a hole in.”

  “It served its purpose. So why did you really drag me away from them?”

  “Because Goodwin was sure to take off his shirt,” he said as he gave her a crooked grin that made her laugh. “All right, you win. I have to go across the lake to meet someone. Would you like to go with me?”

  Cassie had to work to keep from jumping up and down and yelling Yes, yes, yes! Be cool, she told herself. “Sure, why not? I got cheated out of a party with Brent and Skylar so you owe me.”

  “You don’t want to go to any party that those two attend,” he said as he stepped into the boat, then helped her into it.

  “You think I wouldn’t like a night of drinking and dancing?”

  “Maybe you would,” he said as he pulled the cord to start the motor, “but I don’t want to see you that way.”

  The motor started and was so loud that their conversation was drowned out, but Cassie was content. Jeff had come close to telling her that he was jealous and didn’t want to see her with other men.

  It was cool on the lake, and in the middle it was quite dark. She had fantasies that he’d turn off the engine and take her in his arms. But when she looked at him, he just smiled, then glanced out at the lake.

  When they got closer to the shore, she saw that one of the cabins along that side was lit up and she could hear music. She kept her eyes on it as they motored in. The dock was full of boats and there were cars all around the cabin, which was blasting with dance music. People were spilling out of the house and onto the beach, and they could hear laughter mixed with the music. It looked as though every person on that side of the lake was at the party.

  Jeff cut the engine and they coasted into shore three cabins away. He jumped out and tied the boat to the dock. There were four other boats tied there as well.

  “Why don’t you go and join the party?” Jeff asked as he helped Cassie onto the dock.

  “I wasn’t invited.”

  “I don’t think the butler is checking invitations,” he said.

  She stood just inches from him. “In other words, you want me out of your way for a while. You want to keep me busy until you finish doing whatever it is that you’re doing.”

  “Exactly,” he said.

  “What if I say no?”

  “Then I’d have to drug you, wrap you in canvas, and put you in the bottom of the boat. You’d wake up in Shanghai.”

  When Cassie started to speak, he said, “Alone.”

  “Rats! Okay, I’ll meet you at the party. Don’t take too long,” she said, then ran her fingertip down the front of his shirt. When she walked away, she was sure he was watching her.

  When she got to the party, she felt great. For the first time since she was twelve years old, she thought she was making real progress with Jeff. At last he was beginning to see her as a woman. But what kind of woman? she wondered.

  Whatever was happening, she liked it. When she got closer to the cabin where all the music and people were, she hesitated.

  “Wanta beer?” a young man asked, holding out a bottle to her.

  “I wasn’t invited,” she shouted above the music.

  “Who was?”

  Laughing, she took the beer, thanked him, and went inside. She’d just stepped in when a young man grabbed her about the waist, pulled her close, and began dancing. It was the right time and the right circumstances, and she gave herself over to the music and the good-looking young people who had turned the whole house into a dance floor. All the furniture had been moved against the wall, and the big room that had a kitchen in one corner was being used for dancing. There was a fabulous-looking couple dancing on the wooden countertop of the kitchen. She wore a tiny black skirt, and a blue tank top, while he wore just jeans.

  Cassie gyrated to the music with the blond man and saw that his eyes were on the girl on the bar—as were everyone else’s. She looked at the other girls there and saw that they were wearing either very few clothes or garments that were so tight they left little to the imagination. But Cassie had on a baggy sweatshirt jacket over a bulky pair of sweatpants. When she’d dressed to go to the café with Jeff, she hadn’t wanted him to think that she had any thoughts that they were going out on a date, so she’d covered herself well. But she knew that underneath she was wearing a tank top as tiny as any of them at the party, and she had on a pair of short shorts. When she’d dressed she’d had a fantasy that maybe after they ate she and Jeff might…She hadn’t thought about what exactly, but she had prepared for whatever might happen.

  Maybe it was the night, maybe it was the fact that the man she loved had dumped her at someone else’s party, but whatever it was, Cassie felt as though she wanted some of the attention that the girl on the bar was getting.

  She moved her hips toward the boy with her, and when he didn’t notice, she put her hands on the front zipper of her sweatshir
t and began to pull it down slowly. The boy with her didn’t notice. But the boy next to her did.

  “Don’t stop!” he yelled, and Cassie grinned at him.

  She circled her hips and began to pull the zipper down, and three boys began to yell. A girl began to clap. It didn’t take long before Cassie was unzipping and thrusting her shoulder out of the heavy shirt.

  The couple on the bar stopped dancing, then the boy got down and helped the girl down. They were laughing, and the girl shouted, “It’s your turn.”

  Two tall young men grabbed Cassie’s arms and hoisted her up to the bar. She was shocked for a moment, but she recovered herself. The music was throbbing, and what is more, she had a year’s sexual frustration inside her. She thought about Jeff and imagined that she was undressing for him, and in the next moment she was doing a strip on the kitchen countertop. Everyone was clapping and Cassie was moving. The jacket came off slowly, and she twirled it over her head, then threw it out to the crowd to the sound of wild cheering. Her tank top was small and tight and Cassie’s large breasts threatened to spill out. The cheering was deafening.

  Next came the pants as she pulled down one side over her hip. Someone yelled, “What’s your name?”

  “Cassandra,” she said, and in the next moment the room started chanting, “Cassandra! Cassandra! Cassandra!”

  When she began to push her sweatpants down her legs, she nearly bent double, her ample rear end sticking out prominently. And when she bent, that’s when she saw Jeff standing in the doorway. He was frowning, but that didn’t bother Cassie. She stuck out her leg for two boys to pull the pant leg over her shoe. And when it was off, she had two other young men remove the other pant leg.

  She had danced herself out of the pants amid great shouts and cheering. “More! More!” they yelled, and Cassie ran her thumbs under the straps of her tank top, as though she might remove it.

  “No more,” Jeff said, then held up his arms to help Cassie off the counter.

  There was a groan through the crowd as their fun was over. But Cassie was hardly on the floor before there was another girl on the counter.

  “Come on,” Jeff shouted. “Let’s go. Do you know where your clothes are?”

  “I have no idea,” she shouted back. “You’ll have to take me as I am.”

  “Don’t leave,” said a very good-looking young man as he caught her arm, pulling her away from Jeff. “Ask your dad to let you stay.”

  “I am not her father,” Jeff said, glaring at the boy.

  “Sorry,” the young man said. “But can she stay? I’ll look after her.”

  “I saw how you looked after her,” Jeff said.

  Cassie didn’t like the way it was assumed that Jeff had the right to give permission for her to stay or not. “I’m staying across the lake,” she said to the young man. “Could you take me back later?”

  “Sure,” he said, his eyes alight. “Glad to.”

  “I’m not leaving,” she said to Jeff.

  “You could stay too, sir,” the boy said, looking at Jeff. “My mom—”

  “I’m not old enough to be her—” Jeff began, then stopped. The music changed to an old, funky blues song, the bass guitar thumping out a rhythm as primitive as native drums. Jeff took a moment as he seemed to make a decision, then he grabbed Cassie by the wrist and pulled her into the middle of the room.

  She’d never seen Jeff dance. In fact, she had no idea if he could dance, but within a second, she saw that he couldn’t just dance, he was a master at it. Before she could take a breath, he grabbed her about her waist, tossed her in the air, then caught her as she came down.

  The three girls on the countertop stopped dancing and looked at Cassie and Jeff—and within a minute, the whole room had stopped dancing, moved back, and cleared the floor for them.

  There are times, Cassie thought, when everything in your life works. She had taken a lot of dance classes when she was a child—so her mother could list the lessons to others—but she’d never had a reason to use what she’d learned. But when she was faced with an empty floor, some great music, and the man she craved, everything she’d ever learned came back to her.

  She had on about eight ounces of clothing, a tank top, tiny shorts, and a pair of flexible sneakers. When she came down from Jeff, she moved away from him, put her arms up and did a perfect ballet pirouette. When the cheers went up, she was energized.

  She began to dance with Jeff in the way that she’d always dreamed of: sexy, lusty, wanton. It was just the two of them. The audience that was cheering and clapping faded away. She was dancing for and with Jeff.

  Arms, legs, hips were together, apart, sliding, raised, lowered. The music urged them on. She threw her body at his, then lifted her leg until it rested on his hip. He ran his hand up her leg until his fingertips were just under the band of her shorts. The crowd yelled in appreciation.

  Jeff held her hand as he pushed her away from him, then after a moment’s pause, he pulled her back. Just as she reached him, anticipating the touch of their bodies, he grabbed her waist and lifted her upward so that her hips were level with his face.

  As the song ended, Jeff let her come down slowly, inch by inch, as her body ran the length of his.

  The music stopped, and for a moment no one put on another CD. In the quiet, the audience erupted, yelling, cheering, whistling, shouting. Jeff held Cassie to him, his hands about her waist, her body close to his.

  “Not bad for an old man,” a boy said as he slapped Jeff on his shoulder, then stepped toward Cassie. “But you can go rest now. I’ll take over from here.”

  “In your dreams, kid,” Jeff said as he took Cassie’s hand and led her out the door.

  Her heart was pounding, her breath still not calm. She was exhilarated but also shocked that she’d found out this new thing about Jeff.

  He kept hold of her hand as they left the cabin. As they crossed the porch a girl handed Cassie her pants and jacket. “But I don’t think you’re gonna need these tonight,” she said, laughing, nodding toward Jeff, and Cassie smiled back.

  Jeff said nothing, just led her to the boat, then waited for her to put her sweats on over her top and shorts.

  So now what happens? she wondered as she stepped into the boat. Would confessions of love come? Would they carry their erotic dance into the bedroom in the cabin? Whatever happened, she knew she was ready for it.

  The boat ride across the lake was in silence, and she was glad. All she wanted to do was remember their dance. She felt that her body and Jeff’s had said it all tonight. The way he’d danced with her told her that he felt the same way about her as she did about him. She looked at the water, felt it spray against her, and thought how silly they’d been all this time that they hadn’t declared their love for each other. They could have been together as a family. They could have shared their lives this past year. They could have been so much more than they had been.

  By the time they reached the cabin, Cassie was having to work to keep from grinning. For so very long, this is what she’d wanted and waited for. She was pleased to see that Brent and Skylar weren’t there. We’ll just use the big bed in our room, she thought, then, when they return, Brent and Skylar can take the twin beds.

  By the time they got out of the boat and Jeff tied it up, Cassie was wondering if he’d carry her over the threshold.

  But he didn’t. They walked up the steps to the porch and inside in silence. But she didn’t mind. She knew where they were headed. She paused at the door to the bedroom with the double bed and turned back to look at Jeff, but he wasn’t behind her. He was standing in the living room and seemed to be waiting for her.

  “Is something wrong?” she asked.

  “I think we have to talk.”

  Cassie smiled, then turned away so he wouldn’t see her. Jeff was the kind of man who’d ask a woman to marry him before he went to bed with her. She imagined going to a jewelry store with him and choosing a ring.

  He motioned for her to sit down on the c
ouch, while he stood. So he can more easily get down on one knee? she wondered.

  “Cassie,” he began, “you and I have known each other a long time.”

  Longer than you know, she thought, but didn’t say anything.

  “I know what you feel about me, about us, and I want to reassure you that everything you’ve, uh, worked for will happen, but it can’t be right now.”

  She looked at him in puzzlement. “What do you mean?”

  He sat down beside her and took her hands in his. “I mean that I know that you…You are a person of goals and I know that you follow through on those goals, and that’s a good thing. It’s just that I’m involved in something right now and I can’t help you in your goals.”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” she said.

  “Goals,” he said, then looked down at her hands. “I wonder if you know that you’re more like your mother than you think.”

  She pulled her hands away from his. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, but I can assure you that I’m not like my mother.”

  “I don’t mean to insult you. I know what your mother’s like. She’s ferocious in the business world. You’re not like that, but in a way, you are. She decides what she wants, then she goes after it, and so do you.”

  “I have never wanted to be the CEO of a corporation.”

  “No, of course not,” he said, reaching for her hands again and pulling them toward him. “But you did set yourself a goal and you went after it. And I want you to know that you’ve attained it. That’s not a problem. I do love you.”

  He paused when Cassie drew in her breath. Smiling, he squeezed her hands. “How could I not love you? You’re the sweetest person in the world, and my father loves you and my daughter thinks you hung the moon.”

  “Jeff,” Cassie said, “pardon me for being stupid, but I think I’m missing the point to what you’re saying. If you love me, shouldn’t we…” Breaking off, she looked down at their hands together. This wasn’t how she’d imagined that he’d tell her that he loved her. Why wasn’t he pulling her into his arms and kissing her?