***
WATCHING THE LIGHTS on Violet’s Lexus until they disappeared left Ryder disliking the heaviness of his heart.
That was absurd. He should be thanking Joel for unknowingly sticking a wedge in the center of whatever feelings were brewing between him and the beauty that was Violet, instead of wishing he’d clarified that Joel had nothing to do with any of Ryder’s feelings and actions toward her.
Maybe Courtney had been right about him. After you stripped away Ryder’s money and his good looks, what was left to offer a woman?
The property was lit by sporadic solar lights and Ryder walked the stone path to his father’s little cottage. He doubted his father would be awake, but still, Ryder wasn’t ready to go into the big, empty and lonely house by himself.
Light filtered through the windows of the living room and Ryder knocked gently on the front door. Susan let him in, without question, without judgement.
“He’s sleeping,” she said. “Are you thirsty? Do you want a coffee or something?”
Ryder shook his head.
Heading down the hallway, he stopped in front of his dad’s closed door and wished behind it was a man who would challenge him. A man that Ryder could confide in.
Donald had always listened to Ryder, but he’d also never answered the questions he’d been searching for. Donald was the devil’s advocate, challenging him until the answer was clear to Ryder. Ryder missed that about his dad. Ryder missed everything about him. He found it more difficult each passing day to see his dad then it had been to lose his mother. Wanting to talk to him, laugh and share his life and listen to his dad’s life and have him there, but not there, was killing Ryder’s soul.
Until today. Until Violet.
She was the first person to get through his sadness. Ryder wasn’t a hermit. Sure, he hid behind his office door, but there was always someone popping in and the fundraisers he’d been attending the last two years surrounded Ryder with people, but no one had touched his soul like Violet had. No one else had lit that place deep inside that he’d thought would remain dark forever.
Ryder planned on pushing the door open, but what was the point. There was only a confused, sleeping man waiting on the other side of that door.
Back in the living room, Ryder found Susan curled up on one of the reclining armchairs, reading a book with the music sound surround humming a light tune, so quiet it was almost unrecognizable.
“Inch Away,” Ryder said, referring to the band.
Susan looked up from her book and smiled at him. The sharp lines on her face, and clearness of her skin, gave away her youth. She was at least ten years younger than Ryder.
“Yes. Not only is the band local, I went to school with Avery, Sean, Ems and Drew but they’re wonderful too. Their music is soothing. Come sit down. I made you a coffee.” She pointed at the mug sitting beside the other recliner. Ryder should have suspected she would.
“Thanks.” He stretched in the recliner, not bothering with the coffee. “How was Dad today?”
“He was good.”
Ryder was glad to hear that. The days when Donald gave the workers a hard time, dug guilt into Ryder.
Susan detailed her day with his dad, sitting at the garden, what they ate and when he fell asleep. When she finished, she asked, “How was your day?”
Day was great. Night sucked. “Good.”
“Did Joel get a new car?”
Violet’s Lexus. “No. That was Violet Caliendo’s car.”
“Oh...” It came out confused then the next, oh came out hiked in tone like she was assuming he’d invited Violet.
“It’s not like that.” He wished differently. As far as Violet was concerned, he would have come to the cottage to sleep with Susan...which he did not.
“That’s too bad.”
Ryder glanced at her. “Why?”
She shrugged her petite shoulders. “It would be good for you to meet someone, go on dates, you know that sort of thing. Ryder, you might be old, but you’re not old. You should totally go out and meet some ladies.”
“What makes you think I don’t?”
“Do you?”
Ryder didn’t answer. He turned away. It was none of her business anyway. Ryder closed his eyes and fully intended on falling asleep here for the night. It wouldn’t be the first time and not the last and Susan was aware.
She excused herself, retiring to her room.
Before she left she said, “Ryder, was Violet at the meeting last week? The morning you were fishing with your dad?”
Why? Ryder didn’t ask. “She is the wedding coordinator at the Caliendo Resort.”
“So, that’s a yes. It explains that glow you came back with.”
“I do not have a glow,” he grumbled, beyond finished with this conversation.
“Okay. Sure. No glow, my mistake. Goodnight.”
Glow. Ryder had no such thing.
Ryder didn’t need to date and he certainly didn’t need to date someone who didn’t trust him. He had a hard enough time trusting women after finding Courtney in bed with another man. In their bed. Then, as if the woman he’d chosen to spend the rest of his life with hadn’t shattered his heart and soul, to listen to all the reasons why Ryder wasn’t good enough. He wasn’t prepared to go down that road again. Violet was already putting him down, there was no way in hell he was going to tolerate it.