A tanned hand moved into her vision, long fingers reached into the ceramic bowl of cashews in front of her.
"Hi, Felicia," Troy said.
Finally, Felicia managed to pin on a bright smile. She managed to turn his way long enough to flash it at him. "Hello, Troy."
He didn't smile back. "You okay with me sitting here?"
While her fingers played with her wine glass, Felicia gave a light laugh. "Okay? Why, of course I'm okay. Why wouldn't I be okay?"
From the corner of her eye, she saw his gaze turn mildly deriding. "I haven't seen you on the tennis courts recently."
"That's because I haven't been playing recently."
His voice pitched low as he asked, "Have I driven you away?"
"Oh, Troy." She gave another little laugh, so superior, so above it all, and made herself glance at him again. "I wouldn't let you do that."
But Troy simply looked at her.
She smiled, held up her wine, and looked directly back at him. "I'm here, aren't I?"
"Ye-es."
"So." She waved a hand. As if to say she'd just proved her point.
Troy leaned an elbow on the bar, rested his jaw on his hand, and gazed at her. His dark eyes did amazing and mortifying things to her physiology. "So," he said. "You'd be willing, say, to play on a tennis court right next to the one I was playing on?"
"Certainly." Felicia took a sip of her wine, meanwhile imagining Troy playing tennis, his muscles moving under his shirt. Her heart sped the way it did when she remembered his kiss.
"And you'd sit at a table for dinner together with me and your friends, the Hunsington's?" Troy asked.
Felicia inclined her head. Forget her speeding heart. This was what she'd been after. Establishing a normal footing between them. Getting things back to the way they'd been before.
"Really," Troy demanded.
Felicia smiled. "Really."
Troy's lashes lowered while he reached out his free hand to snag another cashew. Felicia watched with a low heat beneath her bodice as he put the nut between his lips. His gaze flicked up to hers again. "You're just so all-fired cool with me that you could do anything."
"Really, Troy, you give yourself too much credit." She leaned closer to whisper. "Just because you kissed me isn't going to change the world, you know. It was no big deal."
Troy's gaze didn't leave hers. "No big deal."
"That's right." Felicia lifted her wine. She maintained her lighthearted smile. No big deal. It had only reversed twenty-eight years of believing herself immune to men. It had only made her realize the incredible vulnerability she had toward Troy, of all people. Troy! Even now the blood was racing through her veins.
"Then..." Troy watched her closely. "Then you wouldn't mind going out to walk on the terrace with me...right now."
Felicia's wine paused on its way to her lips. "What?"
"If you're so unaffected by me, then you wouldn't mind going out on the terrace with me right now. There's something I want to ask you...in private."
It took every ounce of self-possession Felicia owned to maintain her composure. He wanted to go outside on the terrace with her, so they could be alone...to discuss something private? Well. It was one thing to pretend indifference when she was sitting in the safety of the lounge, with the bartender and a few elderly couples scattered here and there. But to be alone with him, in the dark...
Felicia drew in a sharp breath. To be alone with him, in the dark, would teach him once and for all that she was not in his thrall. It would put them squarely back on the normal footing she so wanted. "If there's really something you must discuss with me in private, then I have no problem going out on the terrace with you."
Troy's eyes glittered, suddenly looking dangerous, but Felicia was certain he didn't intend to kiss her again. Troy might be tricky, but he had his pride. He wouldn't kiss her now unless she indicated she wanted to be kissed. Meanwhile he straightened and held out his hand. "Come on, then."
Felicia took his hand. Her stomach did an amazing somersault at the touch of him, but she kept her expression bland. Fortunately, once she was off the barstool he let go of her and let her simply walk by his side as they strolled toward the glass doors that led out to the terrace.
The night was cool, but not uncomfortable. Troy led the way to the stone balustrade that overlooked the grounds. A dark mass of trees stretched in front of them. On the terrace, they were alone. Felicia gritted her teeth together to keep them from chattering.
Nothing untoward was going to happen. Instead, she would make certain they went back to a normal footing, one where he held no kind of power over her, sexual or otherwise.
He turned and leaned his hips against the balustrade. With his arms crossed over his chest, he announced, "I'm not going to apologize."
"Excuse me?"
His jaw set. "I'm not going to apologize for kissing you."
"Well, I — " Felicia was glad it was dark enough he couldn't see her blush. "I'm sure I never asked you to."
"No." Troy's reply was curt. "You didn't."
"Fine." She started to turn. "Then I can go back inside?"
"No."
Felicia's brows went up.
Troy hissed out a breath from between his teeth. "We are not through dealing with this."
"I think we are."
"Then you're nuts."
Felicia drew herself up and raised her eyebrows. "Excuse me?"
"It's still between us," Troy gritted out. "You know it is. We want to get each other's clothes off."
Stunned, and to be truthful, excited, Felicia did her best to appear yet haughtier. "Speak for yourself."
"I'm speaking for both of us and you know it." Troy uncrossed his arms and pushed off of the balustrade. "That kiss was...addicting."
Felicia's heart was going crazy again and her breathing sped. "That kiss was...the simple result of a release of psychic energy," she declared.
"What?"
Felicia waved a dismissive hand. "We were both angry at each other. The kiss came out of that. It was a natural result of the built-up angry energy. Nothing more."
Troy's chin lowered and his eyebrows raised. "A result of built-up anger."
Felicia stuck to her guns. She was not going to admit there'd been anything more to that kiss, anything deep or personal. Though, of course there must have been. She'd never enjoyed a kiss with another man, never imagined, over and over, having another one. Now she simply lifted a shoulder.
"Huh," said Troy. He spread his feet and put his hands on his hips. "So...we only get hot for each other when we're mad. Is that what you're saying?"
Since he was sounding less dubious and more credulous, Felicia agreed. "Yes. I think that describes the phenomenon."
Troy rubbed his jaw. "I'm not so sure, but I'll tell you one thing, we have no business going around kissing each other."
"Agreed," Felicia said. And, though she did agree, she felt piqued.
"The question is," Troy went on, tilting his head. "How the hell do we avoid getting angry with each other?"
It was a darn good question. "Perhaps..." Felicia thought quickly. "Perhaps we should always have something nice to say to each other, when we chance to meet."
Troy stared at her. "Always have something nice to say."
"That's right." Felicia tried not to bristle. It wouldn't do to get angry at him now. "In fact, why don't we start immediately?"
"Saying something nice to each other."
"Yes."
He rubbed his jaw again, his expression more dubious than ever, but he agreed. "Well...all right. At this point, I'm willing to try anything." He paused. "You go first."
Felicia stiffened. "Why should I go first?" He would no doubt let her say something nice, then turn around and insult her.
Troy threw up his hands. "All right, I'll go first. Something nice about Felicia. Something nice." He put his hands down and clasped them behind his back. "Okay. Here's something nice about you." He drew in a de
ep breath. "You're a good person. Honest-to-God, basically good."
Felicia's jaw dropped.
"Well, hey, come on, you know that." Troy sounded defensive. "You pour every ounce of extra energy you have into half a dozen charities. What is it — ? All the way from more art programs in the schools to battered women? And you're good at it. You help an awful lot of people. It's admirable. Yup." He nodded. "Downright admirable."
Felicia knew she still looked like a woman out to catch flies. Troy thought she was admirable? He noticed or cared about the charity work she did? "Am I supposed to believe this?" she finally asked.
Troy scowled. "Look, if this is going to work, you're going to have to at least believe what I say."
"Okay, okay. I'll...try." But she couldn't believe him. Troy didn't admire her.
"Now it's your turn," he said.
"Right, right." But how was she to top that? Felicia licked her lips and tried to think. "Something nice about you..." She grimaced.
"Oh, come on. It can't be that hard."
"Well, actually..."
"Felicia."
"All right, all right." She held up her hands. "It isn't hard, really. I know what I admire about you: how easy you are with people."
Troy scowled. "That's nothing admirable."
"Oh, yes it is. It's a talent you have. I — I wish I had it, too."
"You're fine with people."
"Oh, I have impeccable manners. I know how to make small talk, but you — " Felicia sucked in her lips as she wondered how to put it. "You have a way of drawing people out. You put them at ease and make them laugh. You make them feel...as if they're charming, too." She laughed. "Why do you think you get invited to every party that happens around here? People know that wherever you are, they're going to feel good."
Troy was still scowling. "That doesn't sound like much of a virtue to me."
"That's because you take it for granted. Believe me, it isn't easy for most people." She tilted her head and decided to add, "And it's why I think you'd do marvelous at that fundraising job for the Boston Aid Foundation."
"Oh, for heaven's sake — "
"Troy." Felicia was laughing. "Do you think I would keep offering you, of all people, this job if I wasn't convinced you'd be good at it?"
Troy's eyes narrowed to slits. "Huh."
Felicia still felt like laughing. This had been a most odd interchange, telling each other nice things. And the strange part was, it had felt just as good to say something nice to Troy as to hear him say something nice about her. "So." She chuckled and spread her hands. "There. We aren't angry at each other. Wonder of wonders."
"Yeah," Troy said, low. "It's a marvel."
Their eyes met and Felicia felt her happy smile fade. They weren't angry at each other, but the sizzling awareness between them had not gone away. On the contrary, she could feel it more potent than ever, pulsing against the new idea that he might admire her, and the fact she'd admitted some admiration of him.
"Unfortunately," Troy said, staring at her. "I don't think that fixed the problem."
Felicia swallowed. He was correct. They hadn't fixed the problem. They'd only made it bigger. Even though she wasn't anywhere close to Troy, she took a step back.
"Don't worry," Troy said, very deep. "I'm not going to kiss you."
"Oh." To Felicia's horror, her voice sounded disappointed.
One corner of Troy's mouth quirked. "That is, if we did kiss — which I'm not saying is going to happen — but if we did kiss, it would have to be your idea."
Felicia went very still. In the cool night air they stood looking at each other. Electricity hummed all around them. She could feel her inner motor start to rev. But, no. She wasn't about to kiss him! Not only didn't she want to — of course not — but she just couldn't. That would be — it would be —
Fun.
Felicia hiccupped in surprise at herself. Fun? Fun! Was she crazy? This was Troy they were talking about, Troy who was mean and nasty to her, Troy who was much too masculine for her comfort, Troy who'd kissed her, so violently and so thoroughly that her knees went weak just thinking about it.
But her blood was pulsing hot through her veins, her insides were going soft and melting. She imagined going up to him, touching him, lifting her mouth to his. It would be — it would
be —
Marvelous.
Meanwhile Troy stood there, silently watching her in a way that made him infinitely compelling. All his male sexual power was banked, waiting — at her discretion. It made the whole idea seem so —
Possible.
Felicia took a step toward him. Yes, toward him, not away. She felt anticipation like the twist of a screw. His eyes glittered, but not with danger. They glittered with the same anticipation she felt, and a doubt. Felicia could see the sliver of doubt, the fear that she wasn't going to follow through. Anticipated loss.
That did it, actually. She might well have pulled back and come to her senses except for that moment of vulnerability in his eyes. There was no way she could have stopped then.
Her heart pounded madly as she dared to reach up her hands. Anticipation was at the point of pain right before her palms connected with the flat, faintly rough surface of his cheeks.
Oh, he was all man, but holding himself back, making her master. And, indeed, she felt a rush of triumph, of power, as he stood still beneath her hands. She saw his nostrils flare, felt the need crouched tightly inside him. He let her rise up on her toes and press her lips, ever so cautiously, against his.
Air rushed out through his nose, but he held still. He let her experiment with the pressure of her mouth on his. A small noise came out of his throat and he closed his eyes tight, but he held still.
It was pure delight to have him at her disposal, to be able to run her hands through his hair — it was just as silky as she'd always imagined. It was even okay when he began to respond to her light kisses. In fact, she liked that even better. She would nip, and he would nip back. She would press a little harder. He would press a little harder back. His hands went into her hair, spiking through the strands to hold her to him.
Felicia started to feel a heady sense of power. This hard, strong male body was hers to control. Troy was like a dancer, following her lead, going wherever she wanted.
And she seemed to want more. Exhilaration was like bubbles in her blood, curving her body against his, moving her lips in ever hungrier patterns. Yes, need, she was feeling that, the need to get closer, more intimate. Her hands swept down from his hair, exploring the strength of his chest.
Troy groaned and moved his jaw in a way that opened Felicia's mouth. It was the first initiative he'd taken, but she found that it was okay. It was even okay when his tongue swept into her mouth, touching and then wrapping around her own tongue. It was not the first time a man had kissed her in this way, but it was the first time such a kiss had given her a sweet shock of pleasure. And it was the first time it made Felicia reach for more.
Troy's breathing grew deeper and faster. His hands smoothed up and down Felicia's back. But it was okay, she didn't mind that he was starting to take control, because she knew she'd been the one to set everything off. Meanwhile Troy's hands, strong and assured, circled her buttocks, then skimmed up her sides. His tongue was deep in her mouth when he curved his thumbs over the surface of her breasts. The sensation was so sharply exquisite Felicia flinched.
Fortunately, that didn't stop Troy. He moved his entire hands over her breasts, massaging, testing, squeezing. It was heavenly. Felicia had to wrench her mouth from his and throw her head back.
Thank God he didn't stop. She could hear him breathing heavily as his head lowered to her breastbone. She felt his lips there, hot and wanting. His fingers squeezed her nipples.
Felicia groaned deeply. This was beyond anything. Who knew? Surely nobody could have convinced her before tonight that such activity could be so marvelous.
"Oh! I say!" A deep male voice suddenly intrude
d on the delightful scene. Felicia felt as if she were being jerked awake from a deep sleep. Both she and Troy froze. "Do excuse us," said the voice, but sounding annoyed, as if the opposite were the case. One of the older club members, apparently, and not amused.
Felicia could hear feet moving, clothes rustling. The intruder had stalking off. Meanwhile, Troy pressed his forehead against her collarbone. His hands stilled on her breasts. "Okay," she heard him murmur. "Okay, okay."
Fighting a physical pain that was almost equal to the pleasure that had come before, Felicia drew her hands from his hair.
Slowly, he lifted his head. Slowly, he let go of her breasts. He let go of all of her, and straightened.
"Ho, boy," he breathed, and looked down at her.
Felicia self-consciously straightened her silk bodice. Her gaze flitted up at him, then down.
"That really didn't work," Troy muttered.
Felicia simply nodded. There was no point belaboring the obvious. Why, she'd nearly let the man have his way with her — on the public terrace! She, Felicia, who'd always thought she was frigid.
It appeared she was nothing of the sort.
At least...not with Troy.
Felicia frowned. There it was again, the grand contradiction, that this should be happening with Troy, the most irresponsible, least safe man she knew. Her whole life had been spent trying to avoid involvement with a man like her father, the kind of man who'd desert his wife and family in everything but name — and here she was throwing herself straight into the arms of just such an individual.
Meanwhile Troy was looking as grim as Felicia felt and shaking his head. "We really have to avoid doing that again."
Felicia cleared her throat. "Agreed."
"So, at the risk of acting responsible for once in my life, I have a suggestion." Troy pulled down his shirt. "We don't have anything to do with each other. No conversation beyond 'hello' and 'goodbye.' And we absolutely never, ever, be alone together."
Felicia drew in a deep breath. "Agreed." Of course she agreed!
"Because," Troy went on, getting puritanical, "there is no way we could have any kind of a thing going between us."
"A — a relationship?" Felicia's eyes widened. "Definitely not."
"Right." Troy's gaze flicked away and he pulled down on his shirt again. "It would never work."