“No,” I lied, reaching out and take her hand.
Her fingers curled inside of her hands gently. “I’m just worried you won’t have the time to spend with me.”
I laughed. “Geez, Gwen, I’m just asking for a date.” I took her hand in both of mine and held them up, pulling her closer to me. “Please? Just go out with me once. You won’t regret it. You’ll see.”
There was a long moment of silence before Gwen sighed. “All right. Tuesday’s fine.”
A thousand little bursts of fireworks went off inside of me, happiness dashing across all my senses. After months of carefully playing chase, I had caught my quarry with a rush of satisfaction.
Of course, there was no way I would ever tell her that. So I played it cool. “Okay, sounds great.” Deciding to play Prince Charming, I brought her hand up to my lips and kissed it gallantly.
The contact of her skin on mine, at that moment, had a right to make me happily unnerved. And it did.
Though not the way I had been thinking it would.
Little wisps of an aura flickered around her fingers, and for a moment I stared. For no discernable reason, I suddenly felt an array of uncertainty and hesitation, resignation and slight irritation. I flinched and dropped her hand.
Gwen’s eyes widened just a bit, and I am pretty sure my mouth dropped open in the worst stupidly surprised look possible.
“Ugh . . . sorry, was that my phone?” I recovered as quickly as I could, and dove for my phone (which was still off from the battle), pretending to see if I had any text messages. “Uh, yeah. Cheryl just texted me. Got to head home now.”
Gwen looked dubious, but said nothing. “Okay. Well, I’ll just meet you after school on Tuesday, okay?”
“Sure. Sounds great. Can’t wait.”
Gwen laughed. “You’re not trying to sound like a poet, are you?”
Ha. That was a laugh right there. But I smiled, knowing girls like that kind of fluffy feel-goodness, and said, “Yeah, you’re an inspiration to me, Gwen.” And with that, because I knew I could get away with it, I leaned in and kissed her cheek.
The same spurt of aura lights–the trepidation, annoyance, and slight bitterness–leaped at me again while I touched her skin.
Were they Gwen’s emotions? I wondered instinctively. Intuitively, that sounded about right. But it didn’t make me feel any better myself. “Happy birthday, Gwen,” I murmured, confused and angry at the same time. Why did the thing that made me different have to make me unable to enjoy something like this, now?
She flustered again. “Thank you, Hammy,” she said. “So . . . see you next week in class.”
I waved as I headed back down her driveway. “You bet,” I called back.
And as I watched her head into her home, and the outside lights click off, I allowed myself a brief moment of self-celebration, a brief moment of reprieve from worrying about the rest of the world. Happiness bubbled up inside of me, and I rode the crest of its wave as I headed home.
Even if there were awkward games to deal with, there was no preventing me from gaining my prize. Everything was going to be great. I had a blissful feeling that, come next week, my life would change forever.
☼4☼
Insights
I hardly classified myself as a superhero. There were some who would. There were also people who were staunchly convinced Wingdinger was just a super nuisance, including my own mother. I would just say I was super annoyed. There were a lot of downsides to my line of work.
I’ve already mentioned a few. Another one was that I was constantly in a state of insanity. Not the kind that gets treated with happy sleepy drugs or special attention. No, my kind was much worse.
Flashes of another place in space or time. Dreams from another realm. Nightmares. I had learned to deal with them, tried not to let them bother me, and when I could, ignored them completely.
After close to four months or so of it, and getting nowhere close to letting myself go see a counselor, I was getting more numb. I felt less fear, less confusion. Elysian told me the visions, these sometimes premonitions, were good, since I would be able to see more attacks coming.
These were the type of things he said to make me hate him. And he made sure he said them at the most inappropriate times so I hated him even more.
Like when I woke up gasping in the middle of the night.
It’s always after the defeat of a minion the visions became most clear. I could see every hair on the heads of my foes–whether it was meticulously pulled back like Asteropy, who I would call the lead Sinister, or mussed all over the place, like Maia, who never seemed to quite willing to take her job seriously.
Starry Knight told me once a long time ago, when we first started fighting with each other as well as fighting our enemies, that I didn’t know much about our enemies. I supposed she had a point–not that I would admit it.
From what the Sinisters have told me while they were busy monologuing, along with whatever Elysian says he’s told me, I figured they were some kind of aliens from another world–Elysian called it the Realm of Immortality–and they’d basically come to Earth to destroy humanity and take their Soulfire, their neshamasifa, to use to fight off their old leader, I suppose.
I wouldn’t believe any of this, normally. And I still didn’t like to even consider its truth. But I’d met the old leader, the Prince of Stars, in person. He was the one responsible for giving me my power. I couldn’t explain everything, but I’ll tell you one thing: after meeting him, there was no question about whether or not all of this was true or not. And there was no hope of ignoring it, either.
And because of that, I got stuck with dreams from another world.
It’s nearly always the same cast of characters–Orpheus and his sweaty rainbow of charges. Sometimes I even think I could smell the sweaty sulfur and burnt smoke.
I watched in my dream, transfixed. I can’t seem to ever get out of them early or control them.
In this one, Orpheus definitely was giving off some steam.
“What do you mean, another one of your minions has been destroyed!?” he yelled.
I’d quickly come to think of Orpheus as the babysitter of the Seven Deadly Sinisters, for more than one reason. Every time I’d see him–whether it was in real life or just in my mind–he always seemed to be yelling at them.
This time, his fists were clenching spastically in anger, turning from a normal grayish color to an unpleasant shade of violet.
Taygetay, the red-toned one, shrugged. “It wasn't like I planned it,” she informed him. “I just found out myself.”
“And you don't care at all Grum is gone?” Orpheus asked, seething. The vessels over his missing eye–a result of the first battle between Starry Knight and himself–contracted and expanded at an alarming rate. I would’ve laughed if I felt I could. These situations had a way of suffocating me.
The sharp, dark crimson eyes gazed up uninterestedly at him. “Not really; he was quite irritating . . . not unlike some others I could mention.”
I knew these girls were my enemies. But I had to admire their spunk. I’d known them long enough to know each of them had their own little quirk; some of them were funny, while others were just irritating.
Taygetay’s keen on plotting revenge. Maia was the epitome of lazy. Alcyonë wanted to make the world jealous of her. Asteropy was my least favorite; she believed no one could ever do anything better than her and she was the greatest person(?) in the world. At that point, I’d never fought her, personally, but I knew I would immensely enjoy putting her in her place behind me.
The others were more or less unexceptional in my opinion, or at least hardly memorable.
“Come on, Orpheus, lighten up with the whole anger thing,” Alcyonë insisted. “Really, this is not the first time we've been defeated before we could get anything for our trouble.”
“Yeah,” Maia agreed as she yawned. “We're bound to make some mistakes.”
Asteropy stood up, her yellowish s
kin flaring. “Some of us who aren't always taking a nap, Maia.”
“Hey, I went the first two times, and I'm sleepy! It's not my turn again yet. You haven't done much either, Asteropy!”
“Would you guys just relax and have some of this cake here?” Celaena insisted as she engorged herself with the chocolate fudge cake she had in her hands. Celaena was hilarious; she’s always eating and making really awkward remarks about how she always needed more of everything. She’s like a fat, spoiled, purple baby.
“You might think you have room for mistakes, but you haven't had any recent successes, either, if I might remind you!” Orpheus hissed.
Maia yawned. “It's not like we're counting, Orpheus.” I knew there was way too much effort involved in that for Maia.
“You are to listen to me, remember? If I say we have a problem, we have a problem!”
“I'd say it's you that’s the problem at the moment,” Taygetay smirked.
“Look, Orpheus, it's clear we need to rethink things a bit,” Asteropy stepped forward. “After all, I can't have all these failures on my shoulders.”
“I have an idea,” Taygetay jumped in.
“How could you possibly have anything good to say? You just failed, in case you've forgotten already,” Asteropy sneered.
Taygetay ignored her. “We should investigate our enemies; you know, look for weaknesses, downfalls, those sorts of things. And then destroy them.”
“I have a better idea. We can overshadow a human and cause it to produce more powerful Soulfire!” Alcyonë broke in. “Any addiction or obsession would grow until the human is not only soully consumed, but wholly consumed.”
“'Soully' is not a word,” Asteropy huffled, impatient.
“Who asked you?” Alcyonë snorted. “You're just jealous you didn't it realize sooner humans have a destructive tendency to become obsessive, especially over silly things.”
“I like this idea,” Orpheus muttered softly. “Hmm . . . yes, humans are so intentional about putting their energy projects and things to give them temporary meaning in their lives.”
Alcyonë smirked. “And this way, we could attack humans one at a time; much like you did to revive us, Orpheus, and not draw so much attention to ourselves.”
“You think we've been thinking too big?” Orpheus asked.
Was he really asking that? Recalling the huge debt over my head from the building and roads and foliage needing repairs these past months, I would say he’d definitely been thinking too big.
“Not at all,” Alcyonë purred. “But subtly has its advantages.”
Orpheus' face creepily contorted as I saw him smile. He rubbed his hands together ominously. “Excellent. I like your ideas, Alcyonë. Begin your mission immediately.”
Orpheus would’ve made an excellent video game villain, I sighed ruefully.
“Of course, Orpheus . . . I shall find the perfect human to be our first puppet.”
Taygetay's anger visibly boiled, an interesting look on her ruddy face. “I'm not jealous of your stupidity. Unless you find the weakness of our enemies, you will not be able to get to them.”
Alcyonë didn’t hear her I guess, because she faded out a moment later. And then I did too, thankfully.
I woke up to find my world buzzed into reality. The stark contrast was immediate, almost startling. But I was glad to be free of sleep’s clutches.
I doubted any other teenager had insomnia for the same reason I wanted it.
“Another vision?” Elysian asked eagerly. I got the feeling he had been watching over me with enthusiasm. When I had one of my disturbing dreams, he liked to ask me questions about it and try to decipher it. Or so he said.
I glared at him. Elysian might’ve called himself my mentor, but I was more inclined to believe he’s in the same helpless boat as me. Sometimes, when I told him about the dreams of the Celestial Kingdom, he would get this wistful, confused longing in his eyes.
I guess coming to Earth really screwed up his memory. Or something really horrifying happened to him before he came here. I’ve never been interested enough to ask him or angry enough to accuse him of anything.
“Go away,” I muttered.
“If you don’t tell me, I won’t be able to help you.”
“If I don’t tell you, I don’t have to be reminded of it for weeks on end,” I glared at him, even though the room was dark.
He huffed back; a small stream of fire flared out, and I briefly saw him with his claws crossed and his belly bunched out. “Fine. But I will remember this the next time you run into another demon and Starry Knight has to save you.”
I decided not to answer him for once. We bickered for hours last time we’d fought, and I had to go to school in three hours. I tugged on my covers, rolled over, and squeezed my eyes shut, as though by doing so I could squeeze out the memory of my abnormality.
I didn’t even know why I was a ‘superhero.’ I really didn’t. Sure, I mean I was a great guy. Anyone would want me to be some heroic warrior for their team. I was strong and fast, thanks to years of sports conditioning, good-looking and I was quick-witted. I was the ideal fighter.
But I mean . . . I didn’t know how I’d gotten this way. Spider-man had been bitten. Batman had lots of money but was too cheap for a grief counselor. The Fantastic Four had solar radiation. The Hulk was genetically engineered by his father. The X-Men were all mutants. Captain America was a government experiment.
There were only some many scenarios a person could run through before hitting a wall. Chosen by some all-powerful starlight overlord and granted some supernatural ability was hardly on my list. Born with it didn’t make any sense either, no matter what people thought about Superman.
And those were the only things I could deduce to be true, back at the beginning.
That’s the nice thing about the truth. You don’t have to believe it if you don’t want to.
It’s just better to forget it all. Thinking about it only when I had to. Who wanted to live a life for others? I only had one life, and I wanted to just enjoy it. I didn’t want to question what my duty was to the rest of the world.
In my opinion, I shouldn’t even have had a duty to others. That’s fine for people who join the army and marines and such; they at least have some incentive. But why would you do something for others for no reason or reward?
Hours passed, but I remained wide-awake. I could hear Elysian’s breathing as his chest rhythmically rose and fell. The soft morning light was slipping through my window, and I knew I was not going to be able to fall back asleep. School was going to be hard today, I thought. Even for me–superstar student Hamilton Dinger, the star of Lake County, Ohio–things couldn’t always be easy.
I sighed and sought comfort in the only thing I could: my date with Gwen.
A small smile crept onto my face. It was enough, for now.
☼5☼
More Problems
I slapped my bag down on my desk angrily, just as the first bell rang for the day. I’d just barely made it in time for class to start.
Obviously, the universe was not as apt as I was that it would give me some relief.
One of my best friends, Jason Harbor, looked up from his history book. “What’s up, Dinger? You okay?”
“Yeah, just spitting up flowers here,” I muttered. Any idiot could see I was frazzled.
“What’s wrong?”
“The family institution, for starters.”
“For starters, Dinger, we have presentations on yellow journalism, so please wait until lunch to get your rant out.”
I smirked as I gazed into the bespectacled eyes of my AP History teacher, Martha Smithe. “Anything for you, of course, Martha.”
The fifty-some year old woman I’d come to adore throughout my years in high school gave me her best skeptical look, took a swig of her ever-present coffee, and then turned towards the front of the board, where my assignments were already waiting for me.
I sighed. It had been a long morning.
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“Did your mom get a new chef?” This time it was my other friend, Evan von Ponce, who turned around to inquire.
“Yes, she did. Now she’s on some kind of sugar-free ‘body cleanse,’ but that’s not why I’m upset,” I muttered. “There’s another reason Cheryl’s infuriating today.”
“Did she make you break your date with Gwen?” Jason asked as he tried copying the notes on the board.
“No, thankfully, but she might as well have,” I spat. “She needs me to pick up Adam at the daycare this week.” So that meant I’d either be grounded for leaving Adam there until I was done with my date, or I’d be dragging my babbling brother along with me when I met with Gwen.
“Ouch, that sucks man,” Jason agreed.
“Yeah, she’s starting her new job at the District Attorney’s office today, and once again, her children are taking a backseat to her career.” I rolled my eyes. “And of course Mark is busy going through orientation with the new interns at the hospital.”
My parents were definitely made for each other, I thought bitterly as I copied down the notes as sloppily as possible (just keeping up appearances for Martha’s sake.) Both of them wanted to be the best in their careers, and they’d sacrificed everything practically to get there. My mother was well-known as a tyrant in the city courts, and my father was a cardiologist; these were the formal titles of perpetual child neglect, I assure you. I had no idea why Mark and Cheryl had even wanted kids. Probably to get some kind of award at work.
“Sucks,” Poncey agreed.
“Dinger! Ponce! Do I need to separate you?” Martha’s voice crackled out like a shot of lightning.
Lightning it might have been, but it didn’t faze me. I smiled brightly up at her. “No, we’re good,” I assured her. “Just getting all the notes down.”
Jason, Poncey, and I retreated to silence as we really did have a lot of notes to copy. Well, they did. I was, of course, just faking.
And it was for the best they had to be sufficiently distracted, as I couldn’t tell them the other reason I was upset.