“Amelia’s with King.” Nathan shook his head. “They hurt him bad. He didn’t make it.”
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” I spluttered, unable to say anything else. He held on to me, his presence so reassuring that I almost calmed down. I felt so bad, so guilty, so sure I had caused it all. I couldn’t take it back. No matter how much I wanted to.
“I’m sorry,” I said again. He pulled back and looked me in the eye, seeing everything I couldn’t say. He kissed me fiercely, our bodies entwined as if we would never let go. I thought he would blame me. I thought he might even hate me for letting the whole thing begin. And worse, for missing the chance to help his grandmother. I thought a lot of things, but they all faded away when he held me.
“I was so afraid for you. So afraid,” he whispered in my ear. “Don’t ever attack a werewolf again, please.”
I almost laughed. “I won’t, if you won’t.” He kissed my tears away. That only made more fall. “I’m so sorry I didn’t help her in time,” I said, my voice shaking. I couldn’t say Lia’s name. I was afraid to look at him, but he forced me to.
“What are you talking about? You helped me, you kept Amelia safe, and you saved my grandfather’s life. You could have been killed, Perdita. Do you understand that? We brought this with us, and you could have been the one who got hurt.” He stroked my cheek gently, and somehow it unleashed everything I was feeling.
“I killed him. I watched him die. And I wasn’t sorry, Nathan. I wasn’t sorry.” I gasped for air as my stomach clenched so tight it felt as if I had been punched in the gut. I doubled over with pain, struggling to breathe—my ribs weren’t the only cause. I kept seeing the wolf’s, no, the man’s eyes as he died on the ground in front of me. I heard the noise he made over and over. I saw Lia’s broken body, and suddenly I couldn’t stand anymore. Grief overwhelmed me, threatening to suck me into a blackness I was almost willing to lose myself in.
Nathan helped me to the sofa, holding my hand, and whispering comforting words until I calmed down.
“Listen to me,” he said firmly. “I know how you’re feeling. Trust me, but you can’t let the guilt take over. He was a monster who wanted you to die. And Amelia too. They were going to kill you both. The three of them have been stalking you for months, Perdita. It’s not your fault; you did more than most people would have. He was a killer, remember? It’s our fault, if anything. We should have dealt with them straight away. We shouldn’t have hidden ourselves away. Don’t take on this guilt. It isn’t yours to own.”
I sniffed a few times and looked up at his determined face. He had aged in the last few hours. Seeing him helped me. He found strength from somewhere, and that made me stronger too.
“I mean it,” he continued. “If we had learned from our own kind then none of this would have happened. We should have gone after them; you should never have been in danger. I won’t let it happen again, I promise you. I’m never going to let you feel like this again. You can’t feel guilty for protecting yourself. And my grandmother didn’t die for nothing.” Tears slid from his eyes then, and that was enough for me to gain control over my emotions. It was my turn to comfort him. He had lost a lot more than me.
We were still embracing each other when the others returned. Byron’s face was pale but determined. Amelia sat close to me, her eyes bloodshot from crying. I put my arm around her, feeling her sink into my embrace. Jakob sat with his head in his hands. I couldn’t bear to look at him.
“The body was gone by the time I got back,” Byron said. Hope blossomed in my chest until I realised it only meant the other wolves had come back first. He was still dead.
I hiccupped. “I have to talk to my Dad, and go to the police.”
Byron’s attention snapped back to me. “What are you talking about? You can’t talk to anyone about this!”
I stared up at him. “I killed someone. Someone is dead because of me. I can’t just get away with that!”
“Didn’t you hear me? There is no body. I forbid you to speak of this with anyone.” His words rumbled over me until a trickle of sweat rolled down my back. Byron’s black eyes scared me.
Nathan tensed up next to me. “You forbid her?”
“Yes!” Byron ran out of patience. “I have to protect this family. How am I supposed to explain to the world that werewolves exist? The world isn’t ready for this, and one dead murderous werewolf isn’t worth our time. She will not tell a soul!” His voice rose into a shout, and he paced in front of Nathan, Amelia and I for a few minutes, his face grim as he lost himself in his thoughts. Finally, he stopped and faced us.
“Tell me exactly what happened.”
“It’s my fault,” I said. “I should never have let Amelia come home.”
“Stop it!” she cried. “It’s not your fault. We came in and saw blood on the carpet. Perdita pushed me outside and slammed the door. Made me run. I panicked and went through the woods because it’s quicker. I didn’t think. I didn’t know to be scared!”
Nathan turned to us. “We were on our way. We must have just missed you. We were trying to figure out what happened to King when I realised I had a missed call from Perdita. I listened to the message, and we tried to get to you first.”
“They’ve been following me all along,” I said. “But they came here for Amelia.”
“She’s right.” Jakob raised his head, surprising us with his sudden input. “He wanted Amelia dead. He was barely able to force himself away from her even when we surrounded him.”
“Everyone get ready. We’re leaving,” Byron said.
“Leaving?” I said, shocked at the idea. How could they leave me? I looked at Nathan, my chin trembling. I felt as though I lost a piece of myself anytime he walked away from me. How could I cope if he was gone for good?
He gazed back at me, looking as frightened as I felt. He shook his head slightly then turned to Byron expectantly.
“Don’t worry, you two.” Byron smiled, but his eyes stayed cold. “We’ll take care of you, Perdita. We’re going to leave, but you’ll come with us, of course. We’ll hide and be safe. We’ll make sure they don’t track us down again.”
I shook my head, not sure I was understanding him correctly. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“You have to,” Byron’s voice was a lot softer than usual. “We have to keep you three safe. You’re all connected together. They won’t stop until they hurt at least one of you. And hurting one will hurt the others. You understand?”
This was wrong. All wrong. I couldn’t leave my family. My mother had done that. I was meant to stay with them. I was sick of hiding from the world. Let the werewolves come for me. I was filled with enough hate and rage and sorrow not to care. I knew the connection between myself, Nathan, and Amelia was powerful, and maybe even dangerous, but it didn’t feel right to run away with them.
“I understand, but I don’t agree. I’m not running, Byron. I’m not going to hide away for the rest of my life. If they come for me, well, I’ll have to deal with it then, but I’m not abandoning my family to save myself. No way.”
Nathan held my hand, supporting my decision in silence. Amelia leaned closer to me, clutching my arm.
“You don’t have a choice, Perdita.” Byron was annoyingly dismissive of everything what I wanted.
“Yes, she does,” Nathan said, his voice firm. “And so do I. I’m not leaving her.”
Byron gazed at him in concern but was even more surprised when his own father put his hand on his shoulder.
“They’re right, son. We’ve hidden away for long enough. Let them come. We’ll be ready next time. Hiding ourselves has been a mistake. I’m going to find out who they are and what they want. Then I’m going to deal with them. I won’t lose any more of my family. They won’t get away with it.” The look on his face scared me. It was harsh and cold, everything Jakob wasn’t. He wanted revenge. I didn’t blame him.
“But, Dad.” Byron sounded a little like me.
“I mean it, we’re staying.?
??
“I don’t think….”
“Byron. We’re staying.”
Jakob’s voice was surprisingly firm. Both men stared each other down.
“Stop it,” Byron said, his voice less controlled.
“Stop what?” The tone of Jakob’s voice was so cold, I couldn’t stop shuddering.
“I’m the alpha. Stop trying to force your will on me! I can feel it,” Byron shouted, panic in his eyes.
Nathan’s hand tightened on mine, I wasn’t sure what was happening, but it seemed important.
“We’re staying,” Jakob said, rock steady.
Amelia whimpered, but I watched, fascinated, as Byron finally bowed his head and turned away.
I could see the mix of emotion in Byron’s conflicted expression and knew that I had won for now. He couldn’t make me leave. Although he let it go, I was sure he would try again, even though Jakob was determined to stay.
It didn’t matter because I knew I had Amelia, and more importantly, Nathan by my side. My life began to change when he came along, and now I knew I was a stronger person for it. We were cursed. All three of us.
Except now we had the truth on our side. The werewolves might leave us alone, but we had no way of knowing for sure. They didn’t want us together; they probably wanted me dead. Living meant I would forever carry the heavy weight of the worst secrets. My Dad spent his life protecting me, and I had thrown it all away with one bad decision.
Byron banned me from telling anyone what I’d done; I was too scared of him to try his patience. But as long as Nathan was with me, I could carry on and fake being the same person I was before. The werewolves didn’t want us together, but I was determined; I needed Nathan now. Nobody was going to separate us. I pitied anyone who wanted to try.
Epilogue
“Calm down! There’s nothing we can do right now. I know you’re upset, but getting yourself killed accomplishes nothing. We still have work to do.” Ryan held Willow’s arms tightly, expecting her to bolt again.
“I have to do something. You saw what she did to my father! The little coward, attacking us both from behind.” Willow shook in anger, her face twisting into something ugly.
Deep down, Ryan pitied her, but he couldn’t let her risk his life or his position in the pack. As if she knew what he was thinking, she sneered, looking him straight in the eye. Her height had always irritated him.
“Jack was careless. And so were you. She’s just a human. We wasted our chance, and now we have to face the consequences. You know the rules,” Ryan said, his voice low and careful.
She struggled against him, kicking out in her frustration. Only a hard slap across the face calmed her down. A trickle of blood ran from the corner of her mouth. She licked it slowly, all the while staring at him.
“Don’t ever, ever, talk about my father. You’re practically human yourself. You don’t even come close to comparing to the wolf he is. The wolf he was. This isn’t over. No matter what you say. Vin will agree, and then we’ll see. I’ll never let this day go. And when I’m done with them, I’ll come after you. You’ll see what my father taught me.”
Her tone chilled him. He shivered in spite of himself at the hatred in her eyes. Her rank was less than his, and yet something about her terrified him. He was too weary to fight her; nothing had gone right. Both girls lived, the one werewolf female who had ever successfully bred healthy shifters was dead, and the alpha’s prized fighter had been killed by a human teenager. It was a disaster.
He had nothing to worry about; Vin would kill him before Willow could even try. Ryan let her go, shaking his head. Willow stayed against the wall, hunched over slightly, her blonde hair covering most of her still blood-stained face. She seemed almost feral, ready to leap at him if he gave her an excuse.
“Willow. It wasn’t my fault. It was his idea. I wanted to wait. Pick them off one by one. But you’re right.” He tried to placate her knowing he needed her story to back him up. “A cowardly attack killed your father. A fluke. He was unlucky. She’ll pay for it, but first we need to let the others know what happened. If we stick together, we’ll be okay.” He brushed the hair back from her face carefully, hearing a low whimper.
She sucked her lower lip and sank to the floor, holding her knees and rocking herself. Her eyes were black and wild, but she was shut off from the world, lost in her own mind. Ryan sank down next to her, his forehead creased with worry. He had seen Willow’s ‘episodes’ before, leaving her be and waiting was his only choice. She had always been unstable, but now Jack was gone, it would be worse. He often wondered how badly damaged her mind really was. Mating didn’t work for werewolves, so what made the Evans family so special? Now the one female they really needed was dead, and they might never know the truth for sure.
Willow whimpered again. He stared at her, sympathy mingled with repulsion. She was a poor excuse for a wolf, despite the boasts of her family. He wasn’t sure how he could control her now she was so intent on revenge. But more importantly, he didn’t know if the alpha would spare his life and give him another chance.
Ryan pulled out his wallet and stared longingly at the photo of his family. He had to do whatever it took to get them back. “I’m tired of this, Willow,” he whispered to the unresponsive shifter, knowing she couldn’t hear him. “I don’t want to die. I don’t want to kill. I sure as hell don’t want to babysit a werewolf with mental problems. How did we mess up so bad? They’ll never let me go home now.”
He groaned, frustrated. All they had achieved was giving the Evans family an excuse to want them dead. Things were going to get messy. He could only hope he survived the next fight.
###
Thank you for reading Verity (Cursed #1)—for more information check out Claire Farrell’s blog or email the author. Sign up to be notified of new releases. Watch out for Clarity (Cursed #2) and Adversity (Cursed #2.5) in Spring 2012.
Claire Farrell, Verity
(Series: Cursed # 1)
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