That was ridiculous. "I can't do that! They'll die out here. What would Poppa and Jesse say when they return and all their animals are dead?"
"They'll say that at least you and the girls were safe. Just think if you were to get lost out here. How would the girls find you?"
"My sentiments exactly, which is why I have a rope hanging from the house to the barn. And you do not, so you should get home before you get lost."
"Carolyn..."
"The blizzard might be over tomorrow anyway. There is no sense in arguing this." I walked over to the door and swung it open. There was nothing but absolute whiteness out there. I couldn't even see the rope hanging in front of me. I grabbed some pieces of wood before I grabbed to the rope with one hand. I turned then to look at Scott who was just standing there, watching me with a face that showed he disapproved. I tried to smile, but none would come. "Please shut the door when you leave." Then I left, out into the whiteness all alone. The wind was so strong that I lost all of my wood pieces, but I didn't stop for them. I could hold the rope easier now with two hands, though it was swinging rapidly back and forth.
Finally, I stumbled upon the steps. Crawling up, I pushed the door open and collapsed inside the house.
"Carolyn!" Bethy screamed upon my entrance. She and Laura pulled me in and settled me by the fire. It took me this long to get here, how would Scott possibly get home?
EXCERPT FROM “DISCOVERING HOPE”
Bethany’s Diary
November 16, 1857
Dear Diary,
Today would have been Momma’s birthday. It has been three years since cholera invaded our house and Momma died. Carolyn seemed extra touchy, and she spent most of the day out at Momma’s grave. Poppa seems much happier since Momma Hannah’s been here. I believe that it is because we were always missing someone but now the “Momma” void has been filled. Momma can never be replaced, but Momma Hannah helps take our mind off of what we lost.
After we were all in bed, I could hear Carolyn crying from the next bed. Laura was asleep beside me, and I’m pretty sure the boys were too on the other side of the loft. I slipped out of bed and crawled in next to Carolyn.
She turned over to me. “Is everything all right, Bethy?”
“I was going to ask you the same thing.”
I heard her sigh and several moments of silence passed between us before she spoke again. “How can you be all right with Momma not here? And Hannah? You and Laura call her ‘Momma Hannah’ like it makes no difference to you. I’m trying, Bethy, really, and I thought I was finally getting over Momma’s death. But now…” I could feel her crying beside me again.
What was I to do? Carolyn had never come to me asking for advice before. I lay my head on her shoulder. “I think you just need to open your heart and love Hannah for who she is. No one will ever replace Momma in our hearts, and I’m not all right with Momma not being here. I miss her terribly, but I think you will find that the pain ceases when you come to accept Hannah as another Momma.”
Carolyn didn’t say anything for the longest time, and at first, I thought I had hurt her feelings. Instead she leaned over and kissed my forehead. “When did you become so wise, Bethy dear? I will try to love Hannah as her own person, truly I will. You would’ve thought that after a year, I would have. It just takes me a long time.”
We quieted down then to go to sleep, but I could feel my mind going a hundred different directions. Did I “forget” Momma too easily? Should I still be holding on to the pain of losing her and not have accepted Momma Hannah so quickly? I feel I have no answers for my questions and I didn’t want to disturb Carolyn to ask her.
EXCERPT FROM “ACCEPTING CHANGE”
Laura’s Diary
Friday, August 3, 1860
I am not a writer. I much prefer playing out of doors with my brothers than any inside task my sisters or Momma require of me. For whatever reason, my sisters believe that because they enjoy writing in a diary, I would as well. And now I am jumping ahead of myself. How Carolyn would scold me if she read this!
My name is Laura Anne Woodsmall. Today is my thirteenth birthday, which explains the gift of the diary from my sisters. Here I was, hoping for something like a horse to ride or seeds for my garden, but no. My sisters, Carolyn and Bethany, adore traditions. Carolyn is always reminding us of this tradition or that tradition. She and Bethany both received diaries for their thirteenth birthday and thus assumed that I would like one as well.
When I told Carolyn my worries, her eyes just danced. "Dear Laura. Stop being so pessimistic. You don't have to write in it every day. Besides you may enjoy it."
"Not everyone is a writer like you, Carolyn," I countered, which brought laughter from the rest of my family.
Bethany gave me a hug, "Not to worry. You won't turn into a writer, but please, try to think positively about it."
And I am. I am trying to think as Carolyn or Bethany would, but I find that I am not like them in any way. I even asked Bethany what she wrote in her diary, because I was afraid I didn't have anything to write about. She only told me that I would find my own style. Well, that wasn’t very helpful.
Deep breath. Think positive thoughts.
As I said, I have two older sisters. My oldest brother Jesse married Heather Bow in February, 1859. They now live behind my house and through the woods. It isn't very far, especially for a girl like me.
My step-brothers, Henry and Jake, and I love to take walks through the woods. Well, they are more like adventures. They used to not like it when I tagged along, claiming that girls can't do the same things that boys do. I soon proved them wrong. Now they pretty much allow me to go anywhere I want with them.
Rosemary is the most energetic of our family. She is my half-sister, born to my Poppa and step-Momma. For only being a year and a half, Rosemary certainly knows how to get around. She often follows me. But maybe that is because it is usually my job to keep an eye on her. When Momma and Bethany are in the kitchen, as soon as I finish chores or schoolwork, I am asked to watch her until dinner.
Carolyn is home some too, but now that she and Scott Harp are (finally!!) courting, we don't see much of her. She is typically at the Harp's house or else Scott is at our house. Carolyn visits Jesse and Heather as well. I think she is yearning for when she will have her own house. Though I suppose I will miss her quite a bit.
I am not sure how to end, so I guess… good night? Though it does seem quite strange to be wishing my diary good night.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
A Special Thanks to
God…who has been my hope and rock. For sending His Son to earth and being the reason we celebrate Christmas.
Dad & Mom…for continuing to encourage me through all my writing endeavors and editing my work.
Shawn…for encouraging me to try my hand at writing a novella and keep pushing me for my best.
Tara…for editing my novella and catching my missing words.
ABOUT RACHEL
Author of Finding Faith, Discovering Hope, and Accepting Change, Rachel Rittenhouse has been writing for as long as she can remember. At the age of 17, she published her first book Finding Faith and her dream of becoming a published writer finally came true. Since she grew up loving to read, Rachel remembers the struggle to find wholesome books worth reading for young girls growing in their faith. She strives to write that type of book and because she loves historical fiction, most of her books are set in a past time period. In addition to reading and writing, she enjoys playing clarinet, spending time with her family, going to her church youth group, and babysitting some pretty adorable kids! Rachel is working at her writing, while taking online courses through Liberty University.
Follow me for updates at www.RachelRittenhouse.com
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