With the gentlest of caresses, he scraped his fangs along her throat as he quickened his strokes. Taking her hand into his, he kissed her palm, then held it to his heart as his breathing turned into an all-out seductive purr.
If she didn't know better ...
"Jullien?"
He didn't speak as he came and when he did, he threw his head back and let out a burst of flames that lit up her entire bedroom.
Shocked, Jullien started to pull away, but Ushara held him close and refused to let him go. "Shh ... finish. It's okay. I'm right here."
Then she began a soft, old Andarion lullaby while she ran her hands over his back and through his hair until his body was completely drained and sated.
His breathing ragged, he lay on top of her trying to come to terms with what had just happened to him. And with the fact that he was something he'd never known. That his whole life and heritage had been a complete lie.
He was a Fyreblood Andarion.
So was Nykyrian.
"You okay?" Ushara asked.
Even though he knew the truth, he still had to double-check that he wasn't hallucinating. "Did I . .?"
"Yes."
"Is it always like that?"
"No. That was your second set of lungs opening up to allow you to make fire. Is your throat burning?"
"Very much so. It's also really dry."
She kissed his cheek. "Let me up. I can get you something for that."
As he moved, he started coughing. Then he panicked, afraid he might belch fire again.
Ushara rubbed his back comfortingly. "It's okay. You won't spew fire accidentally, trust me. You'll always know by the way your breathing sounds. You can't make fire unless your second set of lungs is engaged."
He laughed bitterly. "Andarion doctors said the extra lung chambers were a birth defect from being part human. No wonder I always had so much trouble breathing, especially whenever I ran. Human doctors tried to treat me for asthma and bronchial disorders. I used to get so dizzy at times, I could hardly walk."
"It's why we preferred to live in higher elevations on Andaria. It was easier to breathe there." She kissed his shoulder. "I'll be right back." She got up and pulled on her bathrobe.
Jullien coughed again and struggled to catch his breath as he came to terms with all the lies he'd lived with for so long. About everything. He'd never had anyone he could trust or believe in.
Not even himself.
Until Ushara.
For the first time in his life, he had a home where he was wanted. A hand that touched him without scorning him, or hurting him. He now had something to lose.
Something they could take ...
"Are you okay?"
He glanced up as she returned. "What?"
"You look terrified."
"Panic attack." He got up and started pacing the room as it hit him full force. Damn it.
He'd always hated when they struck. They'd started the day his grandmother had told him she'd killed his brother. Since then, they'd come and gone, always without warning. Sometimes he could go for long stretches between them, and then at others ... it seemed like they'd strike back to back.
Suddenly, Ushara was in front of him. "Shh, breathe, baby. Just breathe. I've got you." She pulled him into her arms and rocked him. Her breath fell against his neck while she teased his hair with her fingers and soothed him with her humming. "You're not on Andaria. You're not running. And you're not alone."
"That's what scares me most. I need to make sure Vasili's okay."
"I just checked on him. He's asleep in his room."
"Are the doors locked?"
"Yes. It's all good, Jules. We're surrounded by my family. They all live within shouting distance." She handed him the cup in her hand. "Now drink this. It's not poisoned or tampered with. There are no drugs in it. It's a honey tonic that will soothe your throat." She took a sip of it first to show him.
Jullien drank it and let it soothe the rawness. "Thank you."
"You're welcome. Tomorrow, I'll show you how to use and control the fire."
"Okay, but can we keep this between us?"
"If you want."
He nodded. "Thank you. I'm a big enough freak. Last thing I need is for anyone else to discover that my grandmother was an even more indiscriminate whore than my mother."
Gasping, she arched a brow at his choice of words. "Should I be offended by that?"
"No." He scowled at her, not understanding why she would take that personally. "Not at all. You're not the one who violated your marriage vows."
"Neither did your mother."
"True. What she did was worse. She crawled into the bed of a human who was too big a cocupun to marry her because he lacked the backbone to stand up to his father."
"Is that really what happened?"
Nodding, Jullien took another drink. "He loved her. But he cowed to his father in every way while the old bastard lived. It was sickening." He opened his mouth to show her his fangs. "Notice one's shorter than the other?"
"Yes."
"My grandfather tried to have them filed off and my father stood there, saying nothing."
"What did you do?"
"Before or after I bit the dentist and assaulted the guards holding me down, and was exiled from Triosa for it? Those are part of my arrest records you saw, by the way. The destruction of property and vandalism on Triosa? It's a large part of why I was disinherited by my father." He laughed bitterly. "Aside from the fact that I actually am part Andarion and my dental features don't bother me, can you imagine the shit-storm had I gone home without my fangs?"
"They'd have killed you."
"Yeah. Especially since Eriadne had me imprisoned again shortly thereafter. They'd have eaten me alive if I'd appeared fully human in that hellhole of hers. It was bad enough how fucked I was with human eyes."
Ushara grimaced at the images in her mind that she hoped were only her imagination and not his reality. "How old were you?"
"Barely twenty." Jullien picked his pants up and pulled his link out. He turned it on and handed her the photo of his parents. "I'll never understand how any male could refuse to fight for a female who looked at him with that much love. I've never understood it. For that, I would have gone to war. I would have fought until there was no more life left in me."
"And that's what makes you Andarion." She kissed his cheek. "Now come to bed, husband. We have a lot to do tomorrow."
Jullien swallowed as she dropped her robe and went back to bed completely naked. The sight of her like that made him hard all over again.
This was not the way he'd seen this day ending.
He was now married. With a family--a wife and son.
And still hunted with a foul death sentence hanging over his head.
"Jules? Are you panicking again?"
"Lot-a-bit. There's a reason I used to do drugs and eat my feelings."
"And where did that get you?"
She had a point.
"Tossed out on my ass." Sighing, he set the mug and link on the nightstand and slid in to bed beside her, then gathered her in his arms. "Yeah, okay. This is much better." He buried his face against her hair and let the sweet vanilla scent of her shampoo soothe his ravaged nerves. She gently traced his tattoo in the darkness before she moved her hand to play with the hairs on his chest.
As he listened to the silence, he remembered what Trajen had shown him. But one thing still didn't make sense. "How did you become Trajen's vice admiral at such a young age?"
She stiffened in his arms, then sighed. "You want the truth?"
"That's why I asked."
"I was a little upset when my husband died."
"I would expect so."
She let out a sad sigh. "Let me backtrack. I was extremely upset when my husband died."
"Okay."
She glanced up at him from beneath her lashes while her hand continued to stroke him. "The former vice admiral was his older brother and he knew that Chaz was ... not the be
st fighter. Or pilot."
"Yeah."
"He shouldn't have been making runs through Trimutian territory."
"Are you talking about the Golden Lightyear?"
"Yeah. A lot of The Tavali were making runs back then from Starken to Altaria. The League had just started really cracking down on that area. We all knew it. But it was still highly profitable and Chaz wanted to make one last run through it to make a big score on a Trimala freighter he'd heard was shipping a lot of rare minerals the Probekeins were paying top creds for. So his brother helped him lie to me about it, and sent him on his way with Vasili on board the ship. By the time I found out where he'd really gone, it was too late to stop him or get to him and Vas."
"Zeritui."
She swallowed hard. "Thank you. So three days after Chaz's funeral, I sat in our home, trying to get Vasili to eat and he wouldn't move. He wouldn't speak. He was comatose and traumatized. And I heard Chaz's brother laughing as he walked by outside our door."
She rose up on her arms to look down at Jullien in the darkness. "Something in me snapped. I actually heard it. And I picked Vas up, handed him to my mother, then went outside and challenged Pietr to a Calibrim. Thirty minutes later, he was dead at my feet and Trajen named me vice admiral of the Gorturnum. And while many aren't happy about my meteoric rise from captain to VA, there was nothing they could do about it. It's his right to choose whomever he pleases, and he didn't trust any of them. Not sure why he trusts me, either." She sighed idly. "Anyway, they make shitty comments about it behind our backs. The most common, of course, is that we were sleeping together and he murdered my husband. Pietr found out and I killed him over it--which is the other thing Vasili was fighting about tonight that he didn't want to tell you. It's ridiculous, but it doesn't stop some from gossiping."
"I've not heard it, if it makes you feel better."
"Good."
He reached up to brush her hair back from her cheek. "And now you've given them a whole new topic to gossip over."
She smiled. "I don't care. Just remember, I'm Andarion, too. I protect what I love, and I don't play well with others. The only thing more frightening than an Andarion male protecting his meiran--"
"Is an Andarion female protecting her blood lineage."
"Exactly. And that now includes you, Dagger Altaan."
But even as Jullien settled down to sleep in her arms, he couldn't shake the feeling that this was only temporary. That something was coming for him. It was as if the real Dagger Ixur was standing in the room, staring at him, just waiting for the moment to strike them all down.
Why else would the gods have given him so much unless they wanted to watch him suffer when they snatched it all away?
It was something he'd almost convinced himself was ludicrous until a few hours later when he got up to check the doors and Vasili. Even though Ushara had told him everything was locked, he just wanted to make sure.
He picked his link up to charge it and noticed that for once he had a message.
Weird ...
No one had his number, except for Ushara. He turned it on to check it and his heart stopped.
Where are you hiding, little rabbit? We haven't forgotten you. We will find you, Julie. And we will feast on your entrails. The hounds of Corela will not rest until they see the betrayer punished for what he did, and the rightful tadara back on her throne. We will have your head as a trophy.
While that was ominous, he really didn't give a shit. What bothered him about the text wasn't the threat, it was the next bit of code attached after it. The encrypted cipher he'd used and sent when he'd worked with WAR before his grandmother had been deposed.
Eriadne is with Braxen Venik on his Port StarStation. They've been working together for years, preying on Andarion ships and anyone she views as a threat to her reign. She's been releasing information and skimming profits from The Tavali for it. She scales back Andarion forces, allowing The Tavali to travel through lesser patrolled areas so that they can eliminate her enemies and knock out her competition.
XX Dagger Ixur
Shit. Did they know he was still using that alias? If that were to surface, it could still get him killed. Not just with the Andarions, but now with The Tavali. Venik was the High Admiral for the Portnurmum Nation--a rival clan to the Gorturnums. No matter how much Trajen might like him, he'd be honor bound to hand him over to Venik. And given the bad blood between the two Nations, Venik wouldn't hesitate to cut Jullien's throat.
Now that he was married to Ushara, Venik could also demand her head, too.
His heart pounding, Jullien yanked the chip from his link and destroyed it. He didn't want to take a chance on anyone using it to backtrace him here. If they were able to transmit to it, then they could locate him with it. There must have been something embedded in the photo of his parents that he accidentally activated earlier when he'd shown it to Ushara. It was the only way they could have found him.
I have to be more careful. Another mistake like this and he'd be finished for good.
If he wasn't already.
CHAPTER 12
"What the hell's he doing here?"
Jullien arched a brow at Zellen's warm greeting the instant he walked into Ushara's office. He cracked a devilish grin at her adjutant. "It's official Take A Psycho To Work Day. Didn't you get the memo?"
Ushara burst out laughing. "Would you stop taunting my crew?"
"He started it," Jullien said in a tone to let her know he was still teasing her. "Besides, I was behaving. It's not like I shot him or anything ... which was what I started to do."
Zellen paled at those words.
"He's joking." She headed for her office.
Jullien paused at Zellen's desk to give him a deadly scowl. "No, I wasn't," he said in an ominous whisper. "But let's keep that between us, shall we?"
"Get your cute little ass in here. Now."
Jullien gave one last glower to Zellen before he obeyed. Then he cast an arrogant smirk to her on his way into her office. "Does this constitute sexual harassment under Tavali law?"
"Only if I spank you."
That caused him to raise his other brow with sudden hopeful interest. "Really? And how bad do I have to be for that kind of reward?"
Trying not to laugh again, she grabbed his jacket and hauled him into her office to slam the door before any other curious onlookers started gossiping about them. "What gets into you and makes you do things like that?"
Lifting his red glasses, he rubbed at his eyes. "I don't know. Maybe my aunt was right. I am the Korilon incarnate."
Ushara frowned as she realized his irises were still vibrantly red. She pulled his glasses down over them again and now they appeared as normal Andarion silvery-white. "Why do these make them appear to be white when they're on?"
He stared at her. "Optical illusion from the lenses. Since they have a spectrum filter, I assume it has something to do with that."
She pulled his glasses off again. "Is the stralen permanent now?"
"No idea. Given that no male in my family has ever had it before, I know nothing about the condition. But I would assume so since they haven't faded."
She brushed her fingers along his brow. "Is it painful?"
"No. I can't tell a difference ... other than this happens every time you come near me." He pressed her hand against his swollen groin. "That is quite annoying and highly distracting." His breathing ragged, he bit his lip as he stared down at her with the hottest, needful look she'd ever seen on any male's face. "All I can think about is being inside you." He rubbed himself against her open palm and kissed her before he stepped back and grimaced. "Yeah, that condition definitely qualifies as uncomfortable and makes me glad my pants are baggy."
Someone knocked on the door.
"Come in."
Zellen entered with a furious glower. "You married ... him?" By the way he spat the pronoun, it was obvious he was substituting it for what he really wanted to say.
"I take it the paperwork came in." r />
Zellen made a pain-filled noise. "It did."
"I need you to file it and make sure Dagger has access to everything. He's now assigned as a cock to Davel's crew so he'll need ID and badges."
"Under what name?"
"Altaan."
"Have you cleared this with your parents?"
She gave Zellen a withering stare. "I'm a matriarch in my own right and your CO. I don't need to clear it with anyone."
"I'll keep Ixur."
"Ju--"
"Shara," he said quickly, cutting her off before she used the wrong name. "It'll keep your family off your back. Zellen's right. They're going to balk enough. No need to salt an open wound."
She hated the fact that he was right. They would pitch a fit and that might help a bit until they came around. "Very well."
"And do we really have to put this on record?" Jullien asked her.
"What do you mean?"
"Just that I've got a lot of enemies and I don't want them to find you or Vas. Less paper trail, the safer you both are. I'd rather they continue to hunt me solo."
Zellen nodded. "He's right about that."
Ushara balked at what he suggested. "That will leave you with no protection under Tavali Code."
"I'd rather be exposed than you. And I think we'd both rather hang me than Vas."
She narrowed her gaze at Jullien. "Now you're playing dirty."
"I know. But I won with that hand, didn't I?"
"I hate you."
Jullien winked at her. "Yeah, me too."
Zellen crossed his arms over his chest. "So what am I doing with his paperwork?"
"Put him in as single with Davel's crew."
"You're sure this time?" Zellen asked.
Tears glistened in her eyes. "No. I don't want to lose another husband."
"I won't break your heart, Shara. My word of honor to you."
"You better not. My word of honor to you. I'm descending into Tophet, roping the Korilon myself and riding him straight to you to beat your ass for it if you do."
"Yes, mu tarra."
Zellen inclined his head to her. "All right. I'll get his orders in and have him added to our rolls as a candidate. I assume Davel knows about this?"
"He does. Both Trajen and I second his candidacy for citizenship. Back date it to yesterday. I don't want him on the docks another minute without some Tavali protection."
Zellen nodded. "Okay. I've got a few cock badges in my desk I can give him now that he can take with him."
"Thank you."
"Anything for you, Admiral. I'll get his paperwork pushed through by this afternoon. We'll have him badged and coded by dinner."