Weighing even heavier on my mind was the question of who had turned me in to Horatio. As I considered it, the answer came like a lump in my throat. Sal.
Of course it had been Sal, who saw me leave the forum with Crispus. Even his crusty brain could figure out who Crispus's father was.
That suspicion was confirmed almost immediately when the door opened and Sal's face was on the other side. He'd been cleaned up and was now dressed in a long white toga. Despite that, he still reeked of the mines.
"Try anything and there's a dozen armed soldiers behind me waiting to take their shot at you," he said.
I didn't even blink. "Are you sure? Getting rid of you would do them a favor."
"I'm part of Horatio's house now, managing servants for the Senate's presiding magistrate. So you can see how much my life has improved from the filthy mines."
"Horatio is filthy too," I said. "Just in a different way."
"The senator pardoned me, after I told him where you were hiding. But to be honest, I'd have told him even without the pardon."
I turned from him and sat down on the single chair in the room. "Go away, Sal. Crawl back underground with the other worms."
He chuckled. "If you knew what Horatio has planned, you would beg the gods to take you right now."
"If I begged the gods to take any life, it wouldn't be mine." With my growing anger, magic coursed through every vein in my body, so much of it that I was terrified of what might happen in this tight space. "I could bring the entire apartment down on our heads right now. I might survive it. You won't."
"Your mother warned me about you!" he said. "I should have believed her."
"Warned you about what?" It had been almost five years since Sal sold my mother, while I'd had this magic for only a few days. She couldn't have warned him about this. When Sal failed to answer, I threw some magic at the wall beside us. A large chunk of concrete tumbled to the ground, not much, but enough to frighten him. "What did she say?" I yelled.
"I hate you," he snarled. "And even more, I hate having a debt to you. You never should've saved me in last week's games."
"And you didn't have to spare my life at the mines. So why are you here now? Not to free me."
"No, of course not." He shrugged. "But since you'll probably die in the arena tomorrow, I thought I owed you an explanation. The day I sent you away from the mines, Livia tried to tell you something about your mother."
"What was that?"
The fingers of his hands pressed together, and then he asked, "Why do you think your mother made you promise to stay together? It wasn't so that you could protect Livia. Nic, she has always been there to protect you."
My mind skipped through the last five years, all the times Livia begged me to not to defy Sal, when she hurried me away if Roman soldiers came through the mines, and how she refused to share any of her memories of our parents. I always thought I needed to keep her safe. It had never occurred to me that I was the one who needed saving.
Seeing my confusion, Sal added, "Your mother never sold you to the mines. She paid me the last of everything she had to take you. After the way your father died, she knew the empire would try to find you."
"Why? It was a lightning storm -- that had nothing to do with the empire."
"During one of Rome's battles with Gaul, your father saw his people were about to be destroyed. He tried to create something known as a Jupiter Stone, which he could've used to defeat Rome."
Valerius had told me about the Jupiter Stone, the most powerful of all the magical amulets. He had also told me that many men had gone to their deaths in the attempt to create one.
"My father had magic?" I asked.
"Not enough, apparently. Done correctly, the Stone is activated in a lightning storm, but your father failed and Rome had its victory in Gaul. Your mother fled with you and your sister, but she knew Rome would come after you too, just as they tried to destroy all of your family. Magic runs strong in some families, and Rome would not rest until they knew you could not become a threat." He grinned. "Which you are."
I wondered if Livia knew all of this. Probably not, but it bothered me that my mother would've held that one secret back from us. If Rome was determined to destroy my family, how could she have believed they wouldn't one day come looking for me?
"We hid for almost two years," I said. "But I thought it was from slavers, not the empire itself. We would've stayed in hiding, but Livia was getting sick."
Sal grimaced, as if having to look at me made him ill. "All I know is that your mother believed you and Livia were safer in the mines. Then she asked me to sell her far enough away that Rome would ignore you. And look what you've done -- made yourself known to the entire empire! It's the last thing she would've wanted."
My breath came in shallow bursts, and the magic swelled again within me. "Where is my mother?" I asked. "Is she still alive?"
He shrugged dismissively. "Whatever happened, it was all her choice. For you, Nic."
"Thank you, then." I hated to force out those words, but they had to be said. Even to him. "Thank you for taking in Livia and me."
"Not a day has passed when I don't regret it." Sal frowned at me. "Well, when I don't regret taking you."
I used enough magic to raise the fallen chunk of concrete, although it turned out to be much heavier than it looked. I stepped forward, trying to hide the strain within me to keep that rock held in midair.
"So this is your magic? Lifting rocks?" He laughed. "That would've been useful at the mines. I am still your master, you know."
Grinning, I said, "Let's test that. Command me not to drop this on you and see if I obey."
I lifted it higher so that it came to rest directly over his head. One hiccup from me, and Sal would be finished. He knew it too. Sal backed against the wall and made a cry for mercy.
"Wherever you go, you will never threaten me again," I told him. "And you will never again approach my sister. Never look at her, never think of her!"
"Even if I wanted to, I couldn't." He blinked. "I saw her only yesterday in the forum. She was with General Radulf."
"Why?" Reflecting my anger, the ground shook beneath us. "Was she in chains, or hurt? What possible reason would he have to drag her through the forum?"
"There were no chains, Nic. She walked beside him, clean and well dressed, and she looked happier than I've ever seen her."
I shook my head, more bothered than confused. My emotions were a turmoil inside me, and this new knowledge was yet another weight on my chest. To have any chance of breathing again, I had to let it explode.
But that would be a disaster. If I refused to have any master, then that must include the bulla. I would control it, and not the other way around. Nor would I give Sal the satisfaction of seeing me fail here. I was still angry and confused -- after everything Sal had said, how could I feel otherwise? But I was also in control, and I let the magic dissipate within me. As it drained out, I was left feeling stronger than before. The magic wasn't gone; it was learning to weave itself through my body where I could manage it better. With more time and practice, I would learn to control it entirely.
"Get out!" I hissed at Sal. "Now!"
The door slammed behind me and locked again. It didn't bother me, though. He may not have understood it yet, but I was glad for his visit. Because Sal had given me hope of coming through this. I would return to the arena in control of my magic.
It was evening before Horatio came to visit me. I hadn't eaten all day, so my hope was that he'd bring food along with him, but it wasn't a great surprise either to see his empty hands. Even if he had left his table with a tray of food, I had no doubt he'd have satisfied his round belly before ever reaching me.
I stood when Horatio walked into the small room. He surveyed me from head to toe, then sat in the chair where I had previously been. My eyes darted to the open door. It was just him and me in here, and as far as I could tell, we were alone. He was unarmed, and I still had the bulla.
"You could run, of course," he said. "But I don't think you will."
"Not until I get an apology for what your men did to me this morning."
He brushed that aside with a wave of his hand. "For someone of your abilities, that wasn't even a scratch. And I know that if you had wanted to stop the arrest, you could have done it." Now he folded his arms across his bloated chest. "Why are you still here, Nic?"
Because going into the arena was now about more than taking Radulf's magic. He had threatened Livia if I failed to appear. But there was more ...
"We needed to talk alone." I paused to draw in a breath. "When I go into the arena tomorrow, you must not be there."
He smirked. "Yes, that would work out well for you."
"It's better for you too. I think Senator Valerius intends to have you killed in there."
His eyes widened, briefly, before he got control of himself and the greasy smile returned. "Oh? Why do you think that?"
"He wants the key to the Malice of Mars. Before you give it to General Radulf."
"I'll give it to Radulf, after he defeats you." Now the smile curled into a sneer. "Valerius cannot believe you have any chance of winning tomorrow."
"That's exactly my point! He's only using me as a lure to bring Radulf into the arena, which means he must have another plan." I took a breath. "More than that, with your death, he becomes presiding magistrate -- he will lead the Praetors and control their loyalty. By tomorrow, Valerius intends to possess all three amulets."
"Whatever his plan is, it will fail!" Horatio said. "When I give Radulf the key tomorrow, I will do it in front of the mob, so they will know the Senate and all its Praetors bow to Radulf now. They will see his power, and see me standing at his side. Once I give Radulf the key, Valerius can do nothing to stop us. Valerius will bow to us too, or the Praetor War will begin!"
"He won't bow," I said. "And if war begins, Rome will be destroyed!"
Horatio grinned. "Yes, destruction is my price for the key."
"You want Rome to fall?" I asked. "You are head of the Senate, second in power only to the emperor. Why destroy your own world?"
"My world was already destroyed, many years ago." His eyes fell, and when he looked at me again, they were full of sadness. In that moment, I saw the resemblance between him and Aurelia, more alike than I had realized before.
Horatio said, "Aurelia is your friend, correct?"
I didn't respond. Not because I refused, but because I wasn't sure how to answer that question. Was she still my friend? Had she ever been?
Ignoring my silence, he said, "She's a remarkably stubborn girl, just like her mother. Maybe you noticed."
I smiled a little. "Yes, I might've noticed that."
"I loved her mother more than I've loved anyone or anything. But she died giving birth to Aurelia, and that released a poison inside me. I was a senator, in the greatest empire the world had ever known. But it was not great enough to save her."
"That's why you exposed Aurelia?"
"She was a thorn in the wound opened by losing her mother. And I thought that by giving Aurelia away, the wound would heal. But all these years later, it's only worse. I will give Radulf the key because I want him to destroy the empire that could not save my family."
"Valerius will stop you," I said. "He will kill you before that happens."
"Valerius has no such power." Horatio reached over and patted my cheek. "You seem like a smart boy, for a slave, but not smart enough. I have the key with me at all times, and tomorrow, it will belong to Radulf. Once he finds the Malice of Mars, all of Rome will be his. What can Valerius do about that?" He motioned toward the door. "Run now, if you wish. I know that I can't stop you."
I shook my head. "Tomorrow you're taking me into the arena to fight Radulf. Well, that's what I intend to do."
He stood to leave and brushed off his clothes from the dirt in this room. "You have the heart of a gladiator. It will be a glorious fight. I'm almost sad that you won't survive it."
Very late in the night, I received one other visitor. I had been asleep on the floor, grateful for the warmth of the bulla against this cold concrete, when the door opened. I sat up and glared into candlelight.
It was set on the floor, allowing me to see Aurelia's face behind it. "Why are you still here?" She never wasted time in becoming angry with me. "There are no guards here, and your door isn't locked. I thought I was coming to free you, but now I see you won't even free yourself!"
"Go back to your father," I said tiredly.
"I've been talking with him all night. Here." She handed me a thick slice of bread, which I gladly took. Then she added, "He said he had often watched for me, and wanted to bring me back home, but never knew where to look. He never remarried, or had any other children. Lately, he'd begun to worry about dying without an heir."
An interesting worry, considering the warning I had given him only hours ago. "Congratulations," I mumbled. A part of me meant that. Even if she had lied about him, I knew that getting back to her family was as important to her as Livia was to me. Would I have lied to Aurelia if it meant I could recover my sister? Yes, I probably would have.
She leaned against the wall with slumped shoulders. "However, he's not who I thought he would be."
Her tone was blank, not quite disappointed, or angry, or even sad. It was just stating a fact, I supposed. I stared back at her, completely unsure of what to say. Finally, I came up with a question. "Why?" It seemed safe enough.
"He told me that a war is coming between those who support the empire, and those who support Radulf. He called it the Praetor War." She sighed. "Then he said that if I am to be part of his household, I must support Radulf."
"What did you expect? Valerius already told you all of that."
"But I didn't believe him. I never really trusted Valerius, so I thought he was lying to you."
I paused, and then said. "He told plenty of lies. Just not about that."
She pushed the door back. "Come with me, Nic, but we have to hurry. We'll leave Rome tonight. Go anywhere else that we want."
"What about my sister? I'm supposed to leave her in Radulf's control?"
Aurelia brushed a hand through her hair, obviously frustrated. "Do you know what Horatio has planned for tomorrow? It would be awful to leave Rome without your sister, I agree, but at least you'll leave alive."
"I have a bargain with the emperor. Tomorrow in the arena, I will take Radulf's magic, and when I do, he will grant Livia and me our freedom."
"It won't work."
"When I leave Rome, I want to go as a free person, not a fugitive."
"Nic, you're not listening --"
"Neither are you!"
"They intend to kill you in the arena!"
"And I intend to live!" I exhaled a slow breath. "There's no other choice for me now. Either you'll stand by me and support what I have to do, or you'll get out of my way."
She turned toward me, as her face slowly pinched into something resembling pain. "I can't help you destroy yourself."
"Then this is good-bye."
She tried again. "I was wrong to lie to you about my father, and wrong to want to bring you to him before. I will admit to both of those. But this time, you are wrong. If you go into that arena tomorrow, something terrible is going to happen."
I didn't look at her to ask, "How do you know that?"
"Because I can feel it. Because we're friends, Nic. So you have to believe me now."
I scoffed. "Well, that's the question, then. Whether I still believe that we are friends."
"Do you?"
I held out my hands to her, remembering several days ago when she had slapped chains on them. "Are we equals, you and I? Or do you see me as a slave?"
I must've turned enough for her to see the dried blood on my tunic from where I'd been cut. She gasped and cried, "What happened to you? They told me you weren't hurt!"
My eyes darted behind her as Horatio filled the frame. "Ask him what happened."
/> Horatio eyed Aurelia cautiously, and said, "It's time, Nic."
"Don't go into that arena," Aurelia said.
Horatio pushed her aside. "If you are living in my home, you must obey my orders."
Aurelia's eyes went from me to him, and she said, "Then I will not live in your home." She removed the crepundia and hung it over my shoulders instead. "Maybe Nic should've been your child. He seems perfectly willing to obey you." Then she pushed past Horatio's guards and was gone.
Horatio briefly stared at where she'd been before his face hardened again. He turned to me. "I expected you'd have run in the night. Surely you were warned about the arena today."
"Many times," I said as I walked out of the room. "But my bigger worry is that you weren't warned enough."
As I had done days earlier, we entered the amphitheater beneath a tall arch and walked down the ramp that would take us into the hypogeum. The smell assaulted me far worse than it had the first time. Had I already come so far from the pits of slavery that I could see this place as a free person? Because although I had disliked it before, I had also felt like a part of its filth, used to being chained like an animal. But now I wasn't that slave boy anymore. I remembered freedom again and could never go back to this.
We passed Caela's former cage, now occupied by animals with black and white stripes. Horatio called them tiger horses. I thought of how enraged Caela would be to know they were here, and wished she were here with me again. There were several lions today and one very large black cat that paced anxiously in his cage. I understood his restlessness, which filled my veins as well. I paused long enough to whisper that there would be no death in the arena today. He watched me, and even dipped his head as I passed by. If that cat were a human, it would've been a bow, a thought that amazed me.
Horatio told a passing slave to fetch Felix, then turned to me. "I don't know if it's bravery that leads you into the arena today, or foolishness."
"Bravery on my part, foolishness on yours." I stared back at him. "Let me go in alone to fight Radulf. If you enter the arena, you will not come out again."
"I am the sponsor of these games," he said. "The mob will expect to see me, and I will give them the show of their lives."
"Don't give Radulf the key," I said. "Don't start this war."