“Hayden doesn’t matter anymore.”
“He doesn’t, but we do. And I’m sorry I wasn’t on the up-and-up, but you know why. I’m not letting you go over this crap.” He shrugged as if his mind were made up. “I’m seriously not.”
She took a shuddering breath, tears still threatening to spill. “How did I come in to confront you about lying to me and wind up feeling like the dysfunctional head case?”
He laughed. If Bristol could tell even a sideswiping sort of joke, then he must have said something that reached her. “Well, I usually feel like a dysfunctional head case and I didn’t want to be alone.”
She gave him a watery grin. “You suck.”
“Not yet, but if you lose the clothes, I’ll be happy to find some part of you I can get my mouth on.”
With a playful swat on the shoulder, she sniffled. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I know exactly why you were upset. No one likes to be lied to. Honestly, it’s a relief to me that you know the truth. And now you can stop calling me Jamie. Every time you cry out that name during sex, I want to punch my cousin.”
“Is that his name?” When he nodded, she giggled. “No wonder you grimaced a lot.”
“Next time, I want to hear my name on your lips. And don’t say there won’t be one.”
“I want there to be one, too.” She took a deep breath. “But you’ve got a lot on your plate and a career to go back to. My life is here. And really, where could we take this?”
Damn, she was fighting the relationship thing hard. She had no idea how willing he was to fight back. “I don’t know but I’m not giving up merely because it doesn’t look obvious or it won’t be easy. We’re going to take it one day at a time, okay?” At her uncertain stare, he tried to bite back his frustration. “What’s making you hesitate most. The fame? My crazy past? The newness of our relationship?”
She shook her head. “All of it.”
Her hesitation was understandable. That didn’t make him less impatient to be done with it. “First, you may not think you know me well, but I will never fuck you over like Hayden. I already know you’re not the kind of girl to sleep with a celebrity simply because you can or want to get pregnant for a payday. The getting-to-know-you thing will take time. So will total trust. But I’m willing to be all in if you are.”
“Just like that?”
“Yeah. Because I’ve tried everything else, so I know something good when I find it. The fame is fleeting and not real. I mean, yes, I have paparazzi chasing me and a monster social media presence. I’ve got screaming fans who don’t always know how to observe proper boundaries. But this also allows me to make a hell of a nice living and to do some good in the world through various charities. I try not to take it too seriously, especially since it could all be gone tomorrow.”
She gave him a shaky nod. “And the rest?”
“I can’t undo my past. There was a lot of booze and drugs. I did a bunch of crazy, off-the-chain shit. Because at seventeen, nothing sounds more awesome than living the ultimate rock star fantasy.” He shook his head at the waste of it all. “It took me a decade but I finally started questioning whether I should do any of that wild crap. So I sobered up, and that part of my life is done. Sobriety has given me a clarity about life I’ve never had. Losing Ryan has made me realize that life can be even more fleeting than I thought.”
“I’m sorry for your loss,” she murmured, reaching for his hands and giving them a squeeze.
Jesse clutched at her. “He was a friend. When I changed my ways, it pissed him off. We used to get wasted and tag team women together. I won’t lie; we did it a lot. Once I decided to change, he had no one to party with. He started using more, fucking random girls more. I couldn’t reach him. I couldn’t stop him.”
When he choked back his guilt, Bristol slid closer to him. “It’s not your fault.”
“No, he made his choices. Just like I made mine. But I’ll always wonder if I could have said or done something different to help him. If I could have saved him.”
“Don’t feel guilty for surviving. You did what you had to do for you.”
He nodded. “I knew if I didn’t, I was going to die. The morning I woke up on a hotel balcony puking next to Ryan, five naked girls passed out around us, hung over like a bitch with no idea what continent I was even on, I knew something had to change.”
Bristol withdrew her hands. “That’s a lot of women.”
“Yep. More than I even remember.” He shrugged. “But I can honestly tell you that I’ve never stood in front of any of them and truly tried to work out our relationship. I was engaged once to a friend years ago. She ended up marrying another guy and they’re expecting baby number two. That’s the most serious relationship I’ve had. Until you.”
“I’ve slept with three men in my life, including you. And obviously you’ve been with hundreds of girls.”
Probably more. “The number doesn’t matter. None of this is about genitals. It’s about feelings. I have them for you. I think you have them for me.”
For a long moment, Bristol looked afraid to be honest. Finally, she nodded. “Yeah.”
“So we’re beyond a hookup. It’s up to us to figure out where to go from here. Who’s watching the restaurant?”
“Jayla.”
“So…you don’t have to be downstairs again right away?” He sent her a smile rife with seduction.
Bristol hesitated, then pulled her phone from her pocket and dashed off a text. A ding came moments later. Then she met his stare with a challenge of her own. “Jayla says all is quiet for now, so I could probably stay another minute or two.”
He prowled closer, unbuttoning his pants and lowering his zipper. “How about an hour or two?”
She stood her ground, her gaze dipping down to where he peeled away his jeans. “I don’t know if I’ve forgiven you yet.”
“I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make sure you do,” Jesse murmured across her cheek as he grabbed the hem of her T-shirt and shoved it up. Before he’d whisked it over her head, he’d worked the clasp of her bra open, then peeled them both off at once. The second the garments cleared her body, he covered her lips with his own and sank inside her velvety mouth, stealing inside to claim her.
They’d spoken a lot of words to one another. She’d heard him…for the most part. But now he wanted them to communicate in a way he felt certain she’d understand completely.
“Shoes off,” he insisted.
Then he set to work at the fastenings of her pants while drowning in the taste of her kiss. As he slid them down her hips, she kicked her tennis shoes aside and wriggled her hips until the denim fell to her ankles and she stood before him in nothing but a tiny pair of white lace panties.
Jesse smiled as he released the messy pile of her brown hair shimmering atop her head. As the waves cascaded around her shoulders, heat settled in his belly. Blood rushed to his cock. Yeah, this woman did it for him, excited him in ways he hadn’t known a woman could. For the first time in his life, he wanted to be a better person—enough to do the hard work to improve himself, not use her for some quick fix to normalcy and improved self-esteem, the way he’d tried with Kimber years ago. He intended to be a better man for Bristol. He intended to keep her beside him, wake up every morning to her smile.
Heavy realizations. But Jesse couldn’t remember a time he’d felt clearer or more certain.
“Now lose the underwear,” he demanded. “Slide them down your hips slowly and let me see what I’m craving.”
She cocked her head. “What if I don’t take orders from you?”
Oh, now she was challenging him. He just smiled. “I can take what I want.”
“I dare you,” she breathed.
He understood what she was playing at. If she gave in too easily now, it would bend her pride. Instead, she challenged him to take her body and push the issue of her surrender.
Game on.
Jesse anchored his hands around the fragile u
ndergarment at her hip and pulled. The seam unraveled for him—precisely like he intended she would under his touch.
When she stood naked before him, she shivered. He watched the shallow rise and fall of her breast, the movement of her hard nipples as the midday sun slanted through her window. Her fair skin looked luminous and golden. No spray tan for her. No chemicals that made her reek or look like an Oompa Loompa. Bristol was classic and alabaster, appearing untouchable.
But he definitely intended to touch her—and more. She wasn’t leaving this bed until she knew she belonged with him.
Jesse bent and lifted her against his body, following her down to the mattress. He didn’t give her an opportunity to wriggle away, simply anchored his hips between her thighs and pinned her down. She felt so small beneath him, and he braced an elbow near her head to take some of his weight off her.
She met his stare. Those leafy green eyes of hers were a sight he’d never get tired of.
“Jesse,” she whispered.
The uncertainty on her face broke his heart. “Close your eyes. Yeah,” he commended as she did. “Take a deep breath. That’s it.” He bent to whisper in her ear. “Any doubts you have we’ll talk out later. Right now, I want to worship you.”
Bristol gave a low moan. Against him, she trembled. Then so slowly it made him sweat, she opened her eyes, her arms, and finally her heart to him. Given his past, he probably didn’t deserve her, but he intended to do everything possible to make her glad she’d chosen him.
She clung to his shoulders, and Jesse brushed the hair from her face and worked his lips up her neck. “Feel how good we are together.”
With a little shiver, she nodded. He fanned a hand over her breast, his thumb brushing her taut nipple. She arched into his touch and thrashed under him. He swallowed the sound with his kiss, aligning their bodies until he was flush against her, not merely covering but enveloping her. Jesse wanted to take all of her, make sure she knew that she was his. A sizzle shot up his spine when he thought about the pleasure of making love to her. But more than anything, he simply ached to feel her close.
Yeah, he had it bad. Never in a million years had he thought he would fall hard and fast for a down-to-earth baker. On paper, she wasn’t his usual—not loud or flashy or sexually aggressive. Yet everything about her shy sparkplug of a personality fascinated him. Almost from the first, he’d felt as if some invisible wire attached them, tugging him closer and closer to Bristol. Until her, he hadn’t really known that sort of pull was possible.
Jesse positioned her arms above her head, splayed on the mattress, then eased his hands up her silky flesh from elbows to palms, finally curling his fingers around her wrists. He anchored her to the bed and buried his nose in the cinnamon musk of her neck, closing his eyes as the light brown silk of her hair caressed his shoulder and teased his senses.
Beneath him, she softened, a gasp escaping her throat as she tossed her head back, as if the pleasure somehow surprised her. Jesse took the opportunity to drag his lips up her oh-so-soft skin before working his way to her mouth and dominating the sweet bow with a slanting, possessive kiss.
Endless. Timeless. The joining of their mouths went on. All the things that made Bristol unique piled on top of his senses.
She responded without artifice, exactly as she had the first time he’d taken her to bed. Her glimmering green eyes stared up at him, soft with raw emotion, as he skated one palm down the lush under curve of her pert breasts, her small waist, the feminine flare of her hips. True, she had the same basic parts and curves as every other woman he’d fucked, but she alone made him feel this electric gravity when they touched. When he was near her, his head buzzed, his dick engorged, and his heart chugged.
Jesse didn’t see how he could possibly give her up.
Needing to inhale more of her, he made his way down her body, claiming the sweet expanse of her skin as he descended past her delicate collarbones, the swells of her breasts, her tight nipples begging for his tongue. He took them all, gliding his lips over the sensitive flesh before teasing with his tongue, nipping with his teeth.
Beneath him, she wriggled and moaned in arousal. The sweet music filled his ears. The melody he’d been writing for her played in his head, and the bridge that had stumped him last night suddenly rolled across his imagination. It sounded like a more sensual rhythm than he’d been chasing yet so perfect. So her.
The notes played a soundtrack in his head as he dipped down again to nibble at her hipbones and drag his lips over the slight curve of her belly. Jesse even liked that she wasn’t perfect and didn’t have the sort of personal training regime that made him feel as if he was cozying up to a bodybuilder rather than a woman.
“Spread your legs,” he murmured as he caressed her mound, using his thumbs to open her folds for him.
Bristol’s breath hitched. She hesitated before slowly revealing everything he desired to his ravenous stare.
Jesse hissed. She was already wet and swollen. He glanced up her body, into her eyes. They were glassy and unfocused. Her cheeks looked flushed. The sight of her arousal slammed him in the chest. He’d fucked politician’s daughters and porn stars. But he’d never been with a woman he wanted to please this badly.
He dragged his fingers through her wet flesh, focusing on the little bud hardening more with every circle of his practiced fingers. “You’re pretty.”
After breathing in her velvet scent, he dragged his tongue through the wet groove of her sex, lingering exactly where she would be sensitive, igniting nerve endings he knew would drive her wild.
Beneath him, she thrashed, swinging her head from side to side. He knew she wasn’t negating the pleasure as much as she was trying to assimilate it. He often felt the same way as soon as she put her hands on him.
“You’re sweet,” he muttered in between strokes of his reverent tongue.
Bristol murmured an incoherent sound and dug her heels into the mattress. Her hips lifted restlessly. Her body writhed. Jesse didn’t stop, didn’t let up. When she began panting, he slid his palms up her body and rubbed the turgid points of her nipples between his thumb and forefingers.
When her body tightened and her skin flushed, he knew she rushed toward climax. Her heavy breathing turned to keening wails.
“And you’re mine.” He slid up her body, his thumb still working her clit as it hardened to stone. “Aren’t you?”
“Yes.”
“Say my name,” he demanded. “I want to hear you scream it as you come.”
“Jesse.” Her voice broke as she strained toward the pleasure.
It was one of the most beautiful sights he’d ever seen.
But he wanted to be with Bristol, inside her and a part of her, share ecstasy with her. The two of them together. Now. Always.
The melody he’d been writing for her turned louder in his head. As he reached for a condom and rolled it on, lyrics began pelting his brain. Words they’d spoken to one another. Words they hadn’t yet exchanged but he hoped like hell they would. Words of reverence. Promises. Vows.
She cried out in protest because he’d lifted his hand from her moments before bliss crashed over her, but he had something better. Thank goodness she was close because seeing her unabashed, honest pleasure was undoing him fast as fuck.
“Take me,” he growled, sliding between her taut thighs.
Bristol eased them open as he shoved them wide. In seconds, he’d aligned his cock with her slick channel and tunneled in.
Sensation rained down on him. Bristol felt hot and tight, yeah. But so much more. Receptive and giving. Alive. Perfect. She was everything to Jesse, and he couldn’t believe that he’d found her mere days ago. In the first hour, he’d known that she was different. By the end of the first night, he’d suspected she was truly special. Now he felt an urge all the way to his soul to make her his.
Gripping her thighs, he plunged in to the hilt. A sizzle shuddered down her spine. He plastered his hands flat on the bed and tried to make his way
deeper, crawl all the way inside her. He rocked against Bristol as she whimpered in his ear.
“Jesse…” Her high-pitched voice sounded desperate, and that did all kinds of things to him.
He lowered himself to his elbows and slanted his lips over hers, slipping inside her mouth as he thrust deeper. He synched up both motions, making love to her mouth as he did her body. And god, she made love back to him, clutching at his shoulders, her thighs clinging to his hips, her female flesh gripping him so tightly that every move he made incited friction that ignited pleasure.
The music spun in his head, their rapid breaths and hearts mingling in a thumping backbeat that drove him up higher. The taste of her sweetness spilled onto his tongue. The rest of her body fit against him as if she’d been molded to be his. Somewhere in the back of his head, Jesse realized he was being more fucking poetic about a female than he ever been in his life.
But he finally understood why people had been writing songs about love for millennia. It wasn’t just a jolt that rattled him. It was a mammoth force tearing through his every preconceived