Chapter Twelve FANG
I landed on top of Wanda, which was okay as Wanda is quite soft to land on. I looked up and saw the high brick roof of the secret tunnel that runs through the basement and I felt really relieved--we were safe. But then I saw the werewolf eyes. And this time they were right above me. It was too late to ask Wanda to swap places so I just yelled "Help!" and Wanda kind of squeaked.
The werewolf eyes got closer and I realized that these were different werewolf eyes. They glinted silver, not green, and they looked much, much bigger. This was bad. And what was worse, I did not even have my Combined Werewolf and Vampire Trapping Kit with me--just when I needed it. The only thing to do was to make a run for it. Just as I was wondering if I should take Wanda with me or leave her behind as bait, a greenish glow began to light up the tunnel. Suddenly Edmund's ghostly voice said, "What are you doing here?" "Edmund!" squeaked Wanda. She wriggled out from underneath me and jumped up. "Oh, Edmund, you've saved us, " she said as if he was some kind of hero. Which he was not, since he hadn't saved us at all.
The glow from Edmund meant I could see the werewolf very well. It was a huge wolf and it was horrible. Its mouth was hanging open, its tongue was lolling out, and its great big fangs were ready to bite us. . And what could a runty ghost do about that? Well, what the runty ghost did was to go up to the werewolf, scratch its ears and say, "Hello, Fang, where have you been?" And the werewolf sat down and wagged its tail just like a dog. "Oh, Edmund, " said Wanda dreamily, "you are so brave. " "I am not brave, Wanda, " Edmund said in his funny accent. "Now I must go and find Sir Horace. I shall return soon. " "Edmund, " wailed Wanda, "don't leave us with a werewolf. " Edmund laughed. At least that's what I think the weird noise he made was meant to be. "Fang is not a werewolf, " he said. "Fang is Sir Horace's faithful wolf cub. " And then he floated away and left us alone--with Fang.
"Shall I say hello to Fang too?' whispered Wanda, who would copy everything Edmund did if she could, although I think she would find it hard to float upside down along the ceiling. "If you want to, " I said. "Fang is so nice, " she said. "He's got such soft ears. " "How can you possibly know that?" I asked. "He's a ghost. " "I just do know that, " said Wanda, busily scratching thin air. "You can tell they would be soft if he was a real wolf. " "If he was a real wolf you would not be scratching his ears, " I told her. "You would be wolf supper. " It was not long before we heard the eek- squeak-clunk of Sir Horace walking along the secret passage and the walls were lit up with Q Edmund's green glow. Sir Horace came around the corner and then he suddenly stopped dead. There was a small ping as some- thing fell off him, and I held my breath in case he fell apart, but he didn't. Suddenly the secret passage was filled with a booming, happy Sir Horace voice, "Fang!" Fang leaped up, leaving Wanda actually scratching thin air. He bounced over to Sir Horace like a huge puppy, his tail wagging and his tongue hanging out. Sir Horace knelt down--with a nasty grinding noise and an ominous clunk--and he put his rusty old arms around Fang. "Hello, boy, " he said in a whispery unSir Horace like voice. "Where have you been then?" "Ooh, that's so nice, " cooed Wanda. "Isn't it, Edmund?"
She didn't ask me if it was nice because I am not as sappy as Edmund. But it was. Really great. Sir Horace's booming voice still had a big smile in it when he said, "Miss Spookie, I have you to thank for the return of my faithful hound. Your midnight summons has brought him once more to my side. " "It's a pleasure, Sir Horace, " I said. "Any- time. Come on, Wanda. " "But I want to stay with Fang, " she said, ruffling the ghost wolf's ears. "He's so cute. " "You can see Fang later, " I told her. "In case you had forgotten we are still on a Combined Werewolf and Vampire Hunt. Come on. " We left Sir Horace with his faithful wolf and walked back through Uncle Drac's cup- board--which was, of course, the hidden door into the secret tunnel that I always knew must be somewhere.
"Now that we have found the werewolf, can we go back to bed?" asked Wanda. I picked up my Combined Werewolf and Vampire Trapping Kit from where it had fallen. "No, we cannot go back to bed, Wanda, " I said sternly. "We have not found the werewolf, we have found a ghost wolf. A ghost wolf would not leave footprints, would it? And the were- wolf had green eyes, not silver ghostly eyes. And have you forgotten about Vampire Max?" Wanda did not reply. At first I thought she was being sulky, as Wanda does big sulks, but she grabbed me and pointed to the bat poo hatch. It was open. Inside the bat turret there was a flickering light and bat shadows flying across the old stone walls.
I don't mind bat shadows, since Q they are made by bats and bats are nice, but I don't like scary shadows. And I particularly don't like big scary shadows of werewolves. And there was a huge one of those inside the bat turret. Suddenly the Combined Werewolf and Vampire Trapping Kit didn't feel so great after all--not even my hologram glasses. I pulled Wanda away, but it was too late. The werewolf shadow had seen us and it was coming toward us. I could hear the soft squelching sounds that footsteps make in the bat poo. "Run!" I yelled to Wanda, who didn't seem to want to. "Come on!" The shadow was com- ing closer. I gave Wanda a massive tug and she lurched forward. "Ouch!" she yelled. "Don't pull, Araminta, it's only U--" Suddenly I heard "Minty? Minty, is that you?" "Uncle Drac!" I shouted. "I am so pleased to see you!" "I told you, " muttered Wanda. Uncle Drac squeezed out of the bat poo hatch holding his flashlight. He was carrying a big Werewolf-shaped sack of bat poo over his shoulder. He looked very surprised. "Good- ness me, Minty, what are you doing here at this time of night?" "We were hunting a werewolf, Uncle Drac. " "And a vampire, but he disappeared, " Wanda piped up. "Well, just don't go telling all that to Aunt Tabby, " Uncle Drac said with a smile. "It's way past your bedtime. Come on, I'll take you both back upstairs. "
I suppose I should have been upset that the Combined Werewolf and Vampire Trapping Expedition had come to an end--but I wasn't. Werewolves and vampires are not as easy to catch as you might think, and bedtime sud- denly felt like a good idea. We were just getting near the boiler room when Wanda suddenly stopped, and Uncle Drac and I nearly tripped over her. Wanda is a bit like one of those windup clockwork toys that suddenly run out of steam and stop when you least expect it. She is also not an awful lot bigger than a windup clockwork toy, so it is not surprising that she gets tripped over all the time. She should be used to it by now but she always makes a huge fuss--except this time she didn't.
"Give me the net!" she hissed at me. "Quick!" I gave her the net. When Wanda hisses at you like that you do what she asks. She has a very bossy hiss. I didn't see what happened next because my stupid hologram glasses-- which I had totally forgotten I was wearing on the top of my head--slipped down over my eyes and all I could see were two dark blobs. By the time I had figured out what had hap- pened and pushed the glasses out of the way the werewolf trapping net was full--of Vampire Max. I was very impressed. Wanda looked as if she had been netting vampires all her life. She lay on the floor holding on to the handle of the net as though her life depended on it, and there was no chance that Vampire Max could make a run for it. The net fitted him just right. It covered him from head to toe and he just stood there with his little arms at his sides like he knew the game was up. It is hard to see someone's expression when they are under- neath a combined werewolf and vampire trapping net,but Vampire Max did not look happy--and neither did Uncle Drac. Uncle Drac knelt down beside Vampire Max and peered at him. He looked worried. "Be careful, Wanda, " Uncle Drac said. "This could be dangerous. " I was glad that Uncle Drac knew that Max was dangerous. At least we did not have to persuade him that Vampire Max had to go home.
Then, very carefully, as though he was afraid Vampire Max would bite, Uncle Drac lifted off the net. Vampire Max did not move. He just stood there, totally covered in cobwebs and spiders, star- ing into space with empty eyes. But there was something much worse than his weird vampire eyes: Vampire Max had blood dripping off his long pointy teeth. Whom had he bitten?