Chapter 11
I’d never really had the opportunity to dress up. At last year’s prom I had pretended I’d be out of town, partly because I couldn’t afford a dress, partly because I was afraid no one would ask me. Hearing about how much fun everyone had had made me wish I’d gone. I’d been planning to go this year. Now…well, I was no longer a student and the realization that I’d miss out on something so major made me somewhat sad. That is until the dress Aaron had bought me for the dinner party arrived.
Instead of prom, I tried to focus on the fact that I was wearing a totally cute dress with a halter type neckline and an A-line skirt that landed at my knees. It was more mature than I normally wore, but not too sexy. When I’d put the dress on, I’d noticed the tag said Louis Vuitton. I was no fashion expert, but I knew expensive clothing when I saw it. Once again I was aware that Aaron had money. But how? From what I could see, he didn’t work.
I pulled on my Gucci high heels. Blue, to match the dress. The heels weren’t high, but it didn’t matter. I wasn’t used to wearing dress shoes and for a moment, I wavered on my feet.
“Must be nice.”
I spun around, teetering as I did. Olivia stood in the doorway, chewing on a strand of her hair while she glared daggers at me.
I resisted the urge to grimace. I’d only been here a few days and already had an enemy. “What must be nice?” I grabbed onto the post of my bed, regaining my balance.
She slumped against the doorjamb. She was wearing a black sweatshirt and jeans, apparently her normal garb. “I said it must be nice to be Aaron’s new favorite toy.”
I bristled at her comment. “I don’t know what you mean.”
She laughed, but didn’t look me in the eyes, instead focusing on the floor. “Right.”
She was jealous, obviously. I didn’t blame her. Aaron was awesome and I was taking his attention away from her. But she probably had no idea that Aaron was practically an uncle, so of course he felt a connection with me. “Listen, Aaron knew my dad…”
Her black eyes darted up to me. “So?”
So I can’t help it if you’re jealous.
She narrowed her gaze into a glare. “I’m not jealous, for your information.” She took a step back. “Just be prepared when he tosses you aside for someone new.”
She left me standing there in shock, hugging the bedpost. Surely Aaron wouldn’t toss me aside. We were practically related. She was just jealous, I repeated to myself. In fact it made me feel a little good, in a twisted way, that finally someone was jealous of me. Aaron thought of me as a daughter, it was obvious. And little miss dark and dour couldn’t stand that.
“You ready?” Lewis appeared in the doorway looking like a model in a magazine.
Butterflies fluttered in my stomach, sighing with oppressed lust, those little sluts. He wore a black suit that made his blue eyes pop. I noticed almost immediately that the blue shirt underneath matched my dress. Had he worn that shirt on purpose? I took my lower lip between my teeth. Dang, he looked great. I was gawking, I realized and quickly looked away.
“Yeah, I’m ready.” My voice came out a little breathless. I wished I could read his mind, wished I knew what he was thinking…
He cringed, his hands jerking to his head.
“What is it?”
“Nothing, just…a little headache all of a sudden.” He frowned, his gaze piercing mine. “Did you try to read my mind?”
Confused, I shook my head. “I don’t think so.” I’d wanted to read his mind, but I hadn’t, had I? So why was I flushing like I was guilty?
He smiled, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “It’s nothing, it’s gone. Come on.” He took my hand and I practically fell into him. My body hitting his in an embarrassing display of awkwardness.
“Sorry,” I muttered, pushing away. “I’m not used to heels.” I blushed at the admission and seeing my red face, Lewis laughed.
“All right, then just hold onto me.”
Yes, sir, no problem there. I’d gladly cling to Lewis. I looked down at the carpet and slipped my arm through his, my hand sliding over the smooth, cool material of his jacket. “I didn’t realize this would be so formal.”
He shrugged and led me into the hall. “We’re always kind of formal.”
In other words they were rich. Rich people were always formal, at least in my experience. I frowned. “What, exactly does Aaron do?”
“You mean for work?”
“Yes.”
He shrugged. “To be honest, Aaron comes from family money. His parents were rich, his grandparents. Railroad, oil, something or another. But don’t worry, I mean…no one’s a snob or anything.”
“Oh, okay.” But it wasn’t okay. I wasn’t used to dressing so fancy, or using more than 3 pieces of silverware at dinner. I’d look like a total dork. Even now I could barely stand in heels. And please, I knew more than anyone how snobby people with money could act.
Lewis rested his hand on mine, drawing my attention to him. He looked confused for a moment, his dark brows drawn together. Our steps slowed as I waited to see what was bothering him. His lips parted as if he was going to say something, but instead he shook his head, remaining stubbornly silent.
“What?” I asked, feeling completely self-conscious. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
He gave me a half-smile, his cheeks flushing. “It’s just…I’m not used to reading body signals.”
We paused at the top of the steps. “What do you mean?”
He looked away, as if he was suddenly shy. “I’m not reading your thoughts and I meant it when I told you I’d stopped. But…now I’m wondering what the heck you’re thinking and I don’t like not knowing. Are you flushing because you’re nervous? Excited?”
I grinned, relieved his problems weren’t anything more serious. “Now you know how I felt when I met you.”
We started down the steps slowly, both of us wanting to prolong the moment. “So, I guess we’re even then.”
I bit my lower lip to keep from grinning. I loved when he teased me and we’d been so serious studying meditation and blocking thoughts the last few days that it hadn’t happened often. “I guess so.”
“Cameron, Lewis,” Aaron called up to us. “You ready?”
I was disappointed that my time with Lewis was over but eager to try my new ability. More eager to impress Aaron. I’d been meditating a few times a day, but still, I felt the tingle of nerves as Lewis and I arrived in the foyer. They treated me like some sort of prodigy. I wasn’t complaining…much. It was odd going from being ashamed to proud of what I could do. But I couldn’t help but worry I’d disappoint Aaron and then…who knew. He’d toss me from the house in shame? Find a new toy, as Olivia had said?
“You look lovely,” Aaron said and kissed my cheek in a fatherly show of affection.
I flushed. “Thanks.”
He pulled back, but his spicy cologne lingered around me, comforting in some way. “Now, there are only a few people here, no need to worry. Lewis will help you out.”
I nodded, nerves making my stomach churn.
Aaron took my hand, pulling me away from Lewis. “You’ll be fine. Just make polite conversation and try to keep that wall in place.” He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and led me toward the living room, or parlor as they called it here. I looked back, needing to see Lewis. He smiled at me, his presence giving me strength.
Before we made it into the room, a tall woman in a short, tight black dress came toward us. She didn’t seem to have any problem walking in her heels, which were a good inch taller than mine. She was thin with tanned skin and long black hair. Indian? I wasn’t sure. She was gorgeous and could’ve easily been a model. Was everyone here beautiful? I shifted in unease, my stupid insecurities rushing back.
“Cameron,” Aaron started. “This is Deborah, she helps around the house, sort of a dorm mom. If you need anything, she’ll be happy to help you.”
Dorm mom? As if I’d be
lieve that this woman, with her supermodel looks, was a glorified nanny. And how many children were here, anyway? Besides Caroline, Sam and Olivia, I’d met no one else. She smiled, but her dark eyes remained cold. Without a word to me, she leaned closer to Aaron and whispered something I couldn’t hear. The way they whispered, the way she slipped her arm through his, I couldn’t help but wonder if they were dating. She sashayed away without a goodbye or nice to meet you and I was left to wonder who she really was to him.
Aaron took my arm and pulled me into the room. Lewis had said only a few normal people would be here, but there were at least ten guests gathered in the large room. I swallowed my nerves and pasted a smile upon my face. A rush of thoughts and conversation bombarded my mind. After having gone days in silence, the sudden invasion was almost too much. My skull seemed to expand, my brain aching.
I would have staggered back if Aaron hadn’t been holding me upright.
“You all right?” Lewis was suddenly by my side, his face showing his concern.
When he held out his hand, I took it. “Yeah, just not used to all the thoughts. Didn’t sleep well last night. I heard someone crying…”
“The wind,” Aaron said, smiling. “It’s a creepy sound sometimes. But you’ll get used to it.”
He was lying, or maybe he really thought it was the wind.
Lewis gently squeezed my hand, drawing my attention to him. Stay by me, all right?
I nodded, pushed away from Aaron and made my way into the space. Needing time to gather myself, I looked away from the elegant guests and studied the room where I’d done my meditation exercises with Lewis and Aaron. A fire was crackling warmly in the large stone hearth. The curtains covering the floor to ceiling windows were tied back, showing the quickly setting sun and the expanse of the front yard.
In the background the soft sound of classical piano music played on hidden speakers, combining with the chatter of conversation. I tried to focus on that music instead of the thoughts bombarding me, fighting for attention. Aaron had moved away and was already engaged in conversation with a short, round man with a bald head who reminded me of Humpty Dumpty.
As if sensing my attention, Aaron turned toward me. “Cameron, I’d like to introduce you to Dr. Carl.” Aaron was smiling, but his gaze was all business. “He and his wife vacation on the island.”
The bald man nodded. “Lovely to meet you.” When he held out his hand, I took it automatically. His palm was cold, damp, kind of gross.
I want you to focus on his thoughts, Lewis said. Dr. Carl is your target.
Target? Like I was some secret agent. I frowned, barely listening as Dr. Carl and Aaron talked about his plans to return to the mainland. Doesn’t focusing on his thoughts defeat the purpose of blocking them? I asked.
Lewis grinned, his blue eyes twinkling. Just trust me. You have to focus on the thoughts first, focus on the person you want to block, before you can start blocking them.
Okay. I looked at Dr. Carl, focused on his faded blue gaze, the lines at the corners of his eyes, the way his lips were moving, smiling, then frowning, smiling again. He smelled odd, like cologne and old man.
Did I pay the mortgage? Shit, I can’t remember, he thought as he took a sip of the champagne he held and glanced around the room. Of course he hadn’t a clue his thoughts were entering my mind, punching me over and over in the gut. Is there enough money in my account? If Karin finds out that I’ve lost everything she’ll leave me. Does she look suspicious? She does, she’s frowning…
A heavy sense of sadness weighed down upon me, sucking the energy from my body. His sadness. His gaze settled on the woman across the room, a woman much younger and better looking than him. His wife Karin. He loved her. But it wasn’t a true love he felt, but more like an obsession. She was using him for his money, and he knew it, but didn’t care as long as he had her.
“And how are you enjoying your time on the island, my dear?” He glanced at me.
“It’s very nice,” I muttered, trying to keep up my concentration as well as talk to the man. Aaron drew him back into conversation and I was left blessedly alone.
Okay, Lewis said. Keep focusing on him, but this time imagine that ocean you brought to mind so well the other day.
I took a deep breath in, out, in…out. Quickly enough my body began to relax. The room faded, the people and the noise morphed into ocean waves, roaring in and out with the tide. Dr. Carl appeared before me. Instead of his suit, he was sporting a Speedo, his huge gut hanging over the tight swimwear. Why wasn’t I surprised in his choice of swimwear? He smiled down at me. I cringed, grossed out.
Be gone, you fool, I muttered and pictured that wall. Those music notes coming from his head bounced away. I laughed. I couldn’t help myself. He looked so ridiculous wearing a Speedo while those notes hit him in the head. Soon enough, he faded too and I was left on my ocean island paradise alone. I was free here, in my little mind world, free to relax, free to breathe and hear what I wanted.
A sudden hand on my arm jerked me back into reality. The parlor came harshly into view, the noise of conversation overwhelming.
I blinked up at Lewis, he was frowning. Only block his thoughts. Keep focused on mine. You’re fading completely away. I want you to focus on my thoughts and not anyone else’s.
I rubbed my head, my skull aching some. How? This was more difficult than I’d thought and I was growing quickly frustrated. Since my wall was gone, thoughts came rushing back in and I had to wade through them to find Lewis’s familiar voice.
Who do you hear? he asked.
Everyone.
He settled his hand on my back, the warmth of his palm comforting. Right, so just focus on me, much like you did on that ocean last night. Focus on my thoughts. Not my voice, but my thoughts.
Startled, I looked up into Lewis’s blue eyes. He was seriously going to let me read his thoughts? There was no mirth in his sincere gaze, his face completely serious. I admit the idea had me practically foaming at the mouth. To be able to read his mind, to know what he was thinking…. I felt the subtlest shift, a pressure released, and then heard,
God, she has gorgeous eyes.
I blushed, but didn’t look away. My heart was hammering madly in my chest as I realized the importance of this moment. For the first time, I was reading his thoughts. He’d opened up to me, trusted me. It was easy to remain focused on Lewis because I was so interested in what he had to say.
His gaze slipped to my lips.
What does she taste like? Are her lips as soft as they look?
Heart swirled low in my belly. He wanted to kiss me. He was going to try soon. How I wanted him to! In that moment, no one else mattered. No thoughts entered my mind but his. I had total control.
Aaron rested his hand on my arm, breaking me from my concentration. “Ah, and here comes your lovely wife now.” He was looking at Dr. Carl, but it was obvious he wanted me to pay attention. Ugh, I didn’t want to pay attention to Dr. Carl’s lame thoughts. I wanted to know more about Lewis.
Block Lewis and practice on the woman’s thoughts. She’s coming now. I was surprised to hear Aaron’s voice in my head.
My brain was thumping again. There were too many people telling me too many things. I didn’t want to know what Dr. Carl was thinking, or his plastic-looking wife. I wanted to focus on Lewis and what he thought about me.
Dr. Carl’s wife Karin came sashaying toward us in a tight red dress that showed off every inch of her fake boobs and probably fake butt. I realized this would be Emily five years from now; sexy, beautiful and completely self-centered.
“Hello, darling,” she slipped her arm through her husbands and leaned close to him. I can’t believe I have to be here. Ridiculous, talking to children. Her eyes narrowed ever so slightly on me. Why is her dress better than mine? How the hell can she afford something like that? Please tell me she’s not sleeping with Aaron.
I almost grimaced at the disgusting thought, but managed to forc
e my lips into a smile. “So nice to meet you,” I said with mock sincerity.
Really, Lewis asked. Is it really nice to meet her?
I slid Lewis an annoyed glance. He grinned down at me. You know, I could totally see you two being B.F.F.’s. Slumber parties, braiding each other’s hair. You’re about the same age.
I pressed my lips together to keep from laughing. Would you shut up?
Ready to try again? Aaron asked, interrupting. Was it my imagination or did he sound annoyed?
I gave a discreet nod and focused on Karin, pushing everyone else’s thoughts to the side.
Why doesn’t she love me? Pathetic Dr. Carl slipped through the cracks.
How will I pay my bills? Someone else was thinking.
Wonder if this winter will be cold.
Ugh! I took a deep breath in and out, and focused on my beach, on the roar of the waves, while staring blankly at the crowd in the room.
Okay, Lewis’s voice broke through my defenses. Now let’s switch. Focus on my voice. Just my voice.
Then talk to me, I begged. I couldn’t do this alone. I needed help. I know they thought I was some genius prodigy, but I wasn’t and eventually they were going to realize I couldn’t do what they wanted me to do. Might as well be now.
Okay, Lewis started. I’ll talk to you, about you, because you like when I think about you.
I flushed and looked away from him, taking the cup Aaron handed me, but barely noticing the man. The other voices around me dimmed. Breathe in…out. Focus on Lewis. It was so easy to focus on Lewis.
And? I asked.
And…and I like your laugh. It makes me want to smile.
I bit my lower lip, feeling giddy and warm. I couldn’t look at him, afraid I’d break down and throw my arms around his neck. I took a sip of the champagne. I’d tasted alcohol before, but rarely. It was bitter and bubbled oddly on my tongue. I wasn’t sure if I liked it.
And, Lewis continued as he gazed casually around the room, did you know that when the sunlight hits your hair, it has a red tint?
Red? I jerked my gaze toward him.
He grinned. I like it. And…I like you.
I couldn’t look away from him. I felt like I was drowning in his blue eyes and I welcomed the death. Vaguely, I knew the entire room had grown silent, no thoughts seeping into my brain. The only sound was my heart beating, his heart beating. I heard no thoughts but his…I’d succeeded and didn’t care.
A warm hand suddenly touched my arm. I jumped, glancing up at Aaron. He was smiling down at me, pride shimmering in his eyes as if he’d realized the importance of my success even if I hadn’t.
Aaron winked down at me. I think you deserve a break. “Would you escort Mrs. Carl to the restroom?”
I set my glass on a side table. “Sure.”
“I’ll go with,” Lewis said immediately.
Aaron seemed surprised, his brows drawing briefly together. But before Aaron could object, Lewis latched onto my arm. I had to give him credit for not cowering under Aaron’s obvious disapproval. We started into the hall, Mrs. Carl following.
“I like your dress,” I said mostly to make conversation.
She smirked down at me like I was all of five years old. “Of course you do.”
I slid Lewis an amused glance.
This place is way nicer than ours. How much longer do I have to stay with Carl? Perhaps I should test Aaron. Of course he’s interested in me, but how long before I could move in after divorcing Carl? Aaron obviously has money, I am not going to let some teenager get what I deserve. She slid me a look of disgust after she’d thought those vile thoughts.
Lewis and I shared a glance of disbelief. My God, the woman was arrogant and disgusting. Lewis grinned behind the woman’s back, finding her more amusing than repulsive. “Right through this door,” he said.
Without a thanks, she sashayed into the bathroom.
I shook my head, turning toward the living room. “What a b—”
Lewis grabbed my hand and jerked me around. “Lewis, what are you doing?”
He started running down the back hall, dragging me with him. I tripped over my heels, passing gawking servants, and laughing so hard I could barely stand. “Lewis! Where are you going? Aaron is waiting for us!”
He shoved open the back door and we stumbled outside. “He won’t notice.” He paused and I fell into his chest. My legs were weak, my balance off. I wasn’t sure if it was because of the heels, or because I was so close to Lewis. Our laughter faded as a sense of solitude wrapped around us. Only us. His face was serious, his gaze warm under the soft glow of the backdoor light.
“You’re cold,” he said softly.
“I’m all right.” Even though I wasn’t, I was afraid if I told him I was cold, we’d return to the party. It was freezing and the wind was doing quick work of pulling down my hair from the pins I’d secured it with earlier.
He shrugged off his jacket and placed it around my shoulders, his warmth and scent clinging to the material. It was totally romantic and my heart swelled with the act. He pulled the edges of the jacket closed, at the same time tugging me closer to him. I knew if I looked up into his eyes, he’d kiss me. My heart hammered, warring with my rational mind. Don’t do it, my mind said. What if he pushes you away? Screw you, mind, my heart thought.
I looked up.
For one moment we merely stared at each other. Finally, just as I was getting ready to bite the bullet and kiss him, he lowered his head. My eyes closed and I held my breath, waiting. His lips met mine. A soft kiss, a wonderful kiss. My toes curled in my shoes, my heart jumping madly against my ribs. I’d been kissed before, but never had it felt this…soft, warm, intense.
All too soon, he pulled back, then just as quickly, leaned forward and pressed his mouth to mine again…as if he just couldn’t help himself. I wanted to sink into him, to hug him close, to kiss him again and again. When he pulled back the second time, I let him, too shy to ask for more.
He stared at me for one long moment and I wished more than ever I could read his mind. But I didn’t dwell on the fact that I didn’t know, instead, I savored the quietness of the moment. I savored the feel of his warm hands on my waist while the cold wind bit at my body. I savored the taste of him on my lips.
He smiled down at me, a personal smile, a smile that said we’d shared something amazing. “We should get back inside.”
“Yeah,” I whispered, knowing our time was up, at the same time knowing that while I was here we’d have plenty of chances to be together. I slid my hand into his, following him into the house.