Beth practically dove into the burger, which was dripping with melted cheese, bacon grease and beef juice. If she hadn’t seen Alex Tanner in a towel just that morning, she would have sworn that this burger was the sexiest thing she'd ever laid eyes on.
After a month of fruit for breakfast and salads for everything else, it was ambrosia. The gods themselves couldn't have made a more perfect hamburger.
Beth wiped a dribble of cheddar off her chin. She lifted her head and found Alex staring at her. She tried for a smile, but her cheeks were still stuffed.
“It's good to see you eating,” he said.
Beth swallowed. “I'm not going to lie, this might be the best thing that I've ever tasted.”
Alex smiled back, but he stayed on the other side of the room. He'd been there ever since Agent Ryman had left. She was still sitting cross-legged on the bed. Something had changed.
She'd say that he'd become distant, but it was a physical distance only. She could still feel the weight of his gaze on her.
His guilt hadn’t faded. And Beth doubted Alex was a man who spent much time feeling guilty. She could help him with that. If there was one thing she knew, it was how to carry that particular weight around.
“Aren't you going to eat?” she asked. Agent Ryman had sent up two trays, but Alex hadn't touched his yet.
Alex shook his head.
“You're missing out,” she said.
“We should talk about your schedule for the next couple of days,” he said after another few minutes had passed. “You’ll probably have to cancel a few things.”
“Okay.” Beth picked up her phone between bites and opened the calendar. She listed off the events—a cocktail reception tonight, a trip to the Museum of Modern Art, the wedding rehearsal and the dinner that followed. Then the ceremony on Sunday at noon. She'd have to spend the whole morning getting ready with Isobel.
“You'll have to cancel tomorrow’s trip,” he said.
Her smile fell. She understood, but that didn’t mean that she wasn’t disappointed. She had been looking forward to spending a little more time with Isobel before she became Mrs. Masterson.
“Should I cancel tonight as well?” she asked.
He thought for a moment. “No. We'd better go to that one,” he said. “We’re going to need to have you out in the open at some point.”
Beth swallowed a little harder. Out in the open. She knew she was bait, but she didn’t much like the image that sprung up in her mind: a worm wriggling on a hook.
Alex didn’t seem any happier. His scowl deepened.
“It's not your fault, you know,” Beth said before taking another bite.
Alex turned away from the window. “Excuse me?”
“This whole situation. None of it is your fault,” she said.
The intensity in his eyes increased, and he stared at her for a few seconds. Beth did her best not to squirm under his scrutiny.
Well, she was the one who opened the door. She might as well go through it. “I'm just saying that I probably would have gotten into trouble whether you were around or not.”
“That doesn't make any sense, Beth.”
“Sure it does,” she said. “I have a way of finding trouble. I’m always stumbling into it.”
She polished off the last of the fries on the plate. They were perfect too. Crisp on the outside, but inside they were so buttery they practically dissolved on her tongue. Maybe it wasn't sex that she was hard up for; it was food.
She risked another glance at Alex. Yeah, no such luck. Her belly was full to bursting now, and he still looked every bit as smokin' hot as he had this morning.
She finished chewing and swallowed. This wasn’t working. He wanted a solution. She wanted a conversation.
He took a step toward her. His expression hardened. It wasn't guilt that was darkening his eyes now, but something else. “This isn't pretend, Beth. This isn't trying to save face in front of your mother and ex-boyfriend. There are men out there who are trying to kill you. And they're not going to stop until they do.”
He stopped in the archway that separated the bedroom from the sitting room. Something prevented him from coming closer.
He was afraid of something. She couldn't believe it. She hadn't known him all that long, granted, but she'd never seen a flicker of anything close to fear pass through him. But she did now.
“I know,” she said, trying to calm him.
“No, you don't, Beth.”
She put her plate on the bedside table and swiveled around to step down on the floor. Alex took a step back.
Dear God, he was afraid of her. But that didn't make any sense. Not even a little bit.
“I’m just saying that even if I hadn't met you, even if I had stayed in my own room last night, there is still a very good chance that I wouldn't have slept through the night,” she said, sitting back down on the bed. “Sure, it wouldn’t have been the thought of you sleeping just a few feet away that would have woken me up. But it would have been something else. It's always something.”
“You were thinking about me?”
Beth rolled her eyes. Of course she was. Any woman with a pulse would be. Surely he was aware of the effect he had on women—her in particular.
“I'm trying to tell you, that's not important. I could have just as easily been worrying about how Spencer was going to make my life miserable the next day. Or how I was going to get through another morning with my mother on my back. It doesn't matter. Either way, it would have been my body that John fished out of that dumpster today.”
His expression turned hard. She couldn't blame him. A cold shiver went through her.
“The only reason that didn't happen is because you were there with me,” she said.
His back was up against the archway. Deep lines were etched around the corners of his eyes. None of his tension faded. Couldn't he see that she was just trying to let him off the hook?
“I guess, I'm just trying to say thank you,” she said. “And I'm sorry that I've put you in the position of having to look out for me.”
He shook his head. “You don't know what you're saying.”
Beth laughed. “No, I think I do. I know I've been a pain in the ass since the moment that you met me.”
“You’re not so bad.”
“You’re sweet, but I know how I am,” she said.
He was quiet for a long moment. Beth didn’t push. Instead, she just sat in silence and waited. Waited for him to say something. Anything.
“You have dark circles under your eyes,” he finally said.
It wasn’t exactly the sentimental declaration she’d been hoping for.
“I’m a little tired,” she said. It was a lie. She was exhausted.
He nodded. His gaze was inscrutable. “You should take a nap before we have to go downstairs.”
Beth suppressed a laugh. “After everything that’s happened, I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to feel safe enough to sleep again.”
“It’s all right,” he said. “Rest. I’ll stand guard.”
Beth nodded. Her eyes were drooping before she’d pulled a pillow out from under the bedspread. She didn’t think that she’d fall asleep, not with all the residual adrenaline pumping through her veins. But there wouldn’t be any harm in closing her eyes. Just for a few minutes.
***