“I knew exactly what I was doing,” she said. “I’m not that drunk. I wanted you.”
His throat worked up and down as he swallowed. His breath escaped him in a long sigh, whether frustration or unease she wasn’t sure. Maybe a little of both.
Then he bent down and kissed her on the forehead. “Good night, Jaz. I’m going to go drive into town with Seth so we can get his truck.”
She closed her eyes in disappointment at the significance of the tiny kiss. He was putting her solidly back on familiar ground.
When she opened them again, Zane was gone. She sighed and flopped back on the bed, arms spread. She tucked her hands behind her head and stared up at the ceiling.
They wanted her. She knew this. Knew that both Seth and Zane were attracted to her. Seth’s words rang in her ears, and she wondered if maybe he was right. Maybe it was true for both of them. Maybe she could have been any woman.
That wasn’t enough for her. She’d never be any woman. She’d be everything to them or nothing.
She sat up and struggled to get out of her clothes. Did she have any chance at making them love her in return? At making them see that she needed them both?
It won’t be easy, chérie. The sort of committed relationship between the three of you that you propose is foreign to them. Aberrant. It will be up to you to show them how beautiful it can be.
Cherisse’s caution floated around in Jasmine’s mind. She’d discarded her friend’s words at the time because she’d been too caught up in the idea of resolving her love for both men. Cherisse was right. It wouldn’t be easy. But then what ever was?
She pulled herself up from the bed and trudged over to the window. Seeing Zane’s truck gone, she deemed it safe to go crawl into the shower. She had a long night ahead of her if she was going to wait for Zane to return.
Jasmine watched from the window as the two trucks rolled up the drive nearly an hour later. She dropped her finger away from the curtain and quickly moved over to her bed. She crawled under the covers and waited.
Soon she heard the quiet footsteps in the hall and then heard them pause outside her door. She lowered her lashes until her eyes were half-lidded. To her surprise, Seth appeared around the doorway, his outline recognizable even in the darkened room. She shut her eyes as he moved closer.
She tried to breathe normally as he neared her bed. Then he stopped, and she was dying to know what he was doing. She opened her eyes just a crack, hoping that he couldn’t see her in the dark.
He stood by her bed, staring down at her, an indecipherable expression on his face. Then he reached down to touch her hair. He ran his fingers over the strands and to her cheek. And like Zane, he bent and kissed her softly on the forehead.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
He left the bed, his footsteps retreating across the room. She opened her eyes wider to see him walk out of her bedroom, closing the door behind him.
Her chest ached with the need to go after him. If only it was as easy as going to both of them, telling them she loved them and having them accept that her love encompassed them both.
Her fingers curled around the covers, and she let out a shaky breath, emotion knotting her throat. She turned over on her side and curled her knees to her chest. What if they never accepted it? What if they couldn’t come to terms with the relationship as she saw it?
The idea sent panic swelling into her chest and stomach, twisting her insides until she clawed at her throat in an attempt to assuage the relentless ache.
She lay there for as long as she could stand it and then she got up. Silently, she cracked open her door and peered down the darkened hallway. Both Seth’s and Zane’s doors were closed. Her alcohol buzz long abated, she tip-toed down to Zane’s door and slowly turned the knob.
When she entered, Zane looked up from his perch on the bed. He was sprawled on the bed, the covers pulled up to his waist. He held the TV remote in one hand and propped his body up on his other elbow.
“I thought you’d be long passed out,” he said with a hint of discomfort in his voice. His hand clutched at the sheets and pulled them a little tighter to his waist.
She didn’t speak. Didn’t trust her voice not to betray her. Instead she walked over to the bed and crawled up onto the mattress, kneeling in front of him. With one hand, she reached out and tugged the sheet from his hand. It fell away, revealing an obvious erection.
“Were you thinking about me?” she asked softly, a hint of a smile twitching the corners of her mouth.
“Jaz, you need to go back to your room,” he said in a near groan. He grabbed for the sheet, but she held fast. She was transfixed by the sight of his arousal.
Beautiful. Sleek. Yet completely male and rugged. She was staring shamelessly, and she didn’t care. Dark hair surrounded the thick base, and his cock shot upward toward his firm belly.
“Were you thinking about me?” she repeated as she moved closer still.
“You know damn well I was,” he said in a tight voice.
She ran her hand up his thigh, loving the hair-roughened surface of his skin. The muscles coiled and jumped beneath her fingers. Before she lost her nerve, she moved her other hand and curled her fingers around the base of his cock.
“Jaz…”
It was an intoxicating mixture of satiny softness with a core of steel. She slowly rolled her hand upward, marveling at how quickly it hardened even further in her palm.
“I want to taste you. Like you tasted me,” she murmured as she leaned over his hips, her hair spilling over his groin.
“Jesus,” he whispered with agonized strain.
Cautiously, she circled the head of his dick with her lips. His scent surrounded her, filled her as she inhaled. Tangy. Masculine. He tasted wild and warm. She worked her lips lower, sucking lightly as he rasped over her tongue.
His hips twitched and rocked upward. She moved her hand down, allowing her mouth to follow its progress. When the tip came to rest at the back of her throat, she eased back, squeezing with her hand and working back up in unison with her mouth.
Zane’s hand tangled roughly in her hair. His fingers glanced over her scalp as if he was seeking purchase and finding none. She chanced a peek up his body when she reached the end of his cock with her mouth. His head was thrown back, eyes closed, an expression she could only describe as pain marring his face.
“Will you let me taste you?” she whispered. “Will you come in my mouth like I came in yours?”
He let out a string of curses. He sounded like a man who was losing the last vestige of control. In answer to her question, he surged upward, burying his cock in her mouth. His hand tightened in her hair as he held her in place.
His other hand found the hem of her nightshirt and he pulled upward. “Take it off,” he muttered. “I want to see you.”
She released his cock and rocked back on her heels. Her hands fumbled with his as they both yanked at her shirt. She pulled it over her head and tossed it to the floor.
Zane stared at her, his eyes glittering as his gaze fastened on her breasts. “Come here, baby. I want to taste them.”
He pulled her forward, angling his mouth so that her nipple slid between his seeking lips. Pleasure rocketed through her abdomen, tightening her pussy until she squirmed.
“Like candy,” he murmured. “So sweet and delicate.” He nibbled at the rigid tip then coaxed her over so he could lap at the other.
She threaded her hand into his thick hair, holding him against her. His mouth, so hot and wet, sucked avidly at her breast and sent delicious shivers down her spine.
Then he released her, and he pushed impatiently at her shoulders, guiding her back down to his cock. “Finish it,” he said huskily. “Make me come.”
She lowered her head, once again grasping his cock, and guided it to her mouth. She closed her eyes and sucked him deep, allowing herself to revel in his taste and feel.
“That’s it,” he moaned. He stroked her hair, touched her face, feathered his fingers across her jaw as he pumped his hips up and down.
As she took him deep, his hands glided down her body to cup her breasts. He rolled her nipples between his fingers, alternating cupping the small globes with thumbing her stiff peaks.
“I’m going to come, baby. If you don’t want me to come in your mouth, you need to move,” he said in a strained voice.
She ignored him and sucked harder. She moved her hand from the base of his cock and wrapped her fingers around his sac. She loved the feel of the soft, puckered skin dotted with fine hairs. His balls tightened and rolled as she lightly squeezed.
His hand curled around the base of her neck and held her firmly in place as he buried himself one last time. Warm, salty fluid spurted into her mouth.
It felt thick and creamy as it spilled onto her tongue. She’d never experienced anything so erotic. She swallowed, opening her mouth so he could go deeper. She wanted him. All of him.
Finally he slumped back onto the bed, sliding from her mouth in the process. She stared up at him, and he stared back with lazy contentment. He reached out a thumb and wiped his fluid from her lips.
“Beautiful,” he murmured. “So fucking wild and beautiful. I hope to God you never change.”
She curled herself into his embrace, melting against his hard body. He wrapped his arms around her and rolled until they lay side by side.
“Don’t make me go,” she whispered. “Hold me just for tonight.”
He leaned forward and kissed her softly on the lips. “We can’t do this, Jaz.”
She wanted to argue. Wanted to point out that there was no reason they couldn’t other than his own personal hang-ups and the fact that Seth had probably already laid down the law. But she also knew she was going to have to be patient. Zane and Seth were worth it to her. It would take time, and she didn’t want to push too hard too fast and ruin her chance at happiness.
So she nuzzled into his chest, closing her eyes as the warmth of his embrace bled into her body. “Then be angry at me tomorrow,” she said. “But for tonight, I don’t want to be alone.”
Chapter Ten
Seth knew before he ever opened Zane’s door that he shouldn’t go looking for trouble. Still, he was compelled to see if Jasmine was once again in Zane’s bed. It was early, not even light, and when he’d peeked in on Jasmine, he’d found her bed empty.
But he wasn’t prepared for the sight that greeted him. Jasmine, naked, curled up next to Zane, who was also—naked.
His fingers clenched the knob and anger buzzed over him in a white hot flash. Zane’s arm was thrown possessively over Jasmine, and his hand cupped one of her breasts. His cheek rested against her dark hair, and both were sound asleep.
He felt—betrayed.
Before he did something he knew he’d regret, he retreated, shutting the door behind him. He stood outside Zane’s door for a long moment, trying to control the anger, and if he were honest, the jealousy that was fast taking over his rationality.
He stalked down the stairs and headed outside. His fists were still clenched, and he willed himself to calm down. He had no right to be pissed. He’d pushed Jasmine away. Been cruel to her. On purpose. She had every right to find comfort elsewhere.
But a large part of him was angry that she’d found it so soon. And with his brother.
What a goddamn mess.
He began unloading sacks of seed from the trailer, hoisting them to his shoulder and tossing them down in a row inside the shed. He worked mechanically, trying to numb his raw emotions.
He barely noticed sunrise, and only stopped to drag an arm over his damp brow when the sun had been up a good hour. His shoulders and arms ached from the continual lifting and tossing. But he only had a few sacks left.
“Hey bro, you should have waited on me,” Zane said from behind him. “I told you I’d help you get those unloaded this morning.”
Seth tensed and slowly rose to a standing position. He wiped his hands on his jeans and turned to face his brother.
“I figured you were otherwise occupied,” he said in a clipped tone.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Zane asked. But he averted his eyes almost guiltily.
Which only made Seth angrier.
“What the hell are you doing fucking that little girl?”
Zane blinked, his expression shocked by Seth’s outburst. Then his eyes narrowed and his lips thinned.
“She’s not a little girl, Seth. You know it and I know it.”
“I don’t give a damn. You crossed the damn line. You know it and I know it,” he said, tossing Zane’s words back at him.
“What line is that exactly?” Zane demanded. “The one where you tell me how to act and feel? I’ve got news for you big brother. I don’t need a goddamn babysitter, and I damn sure don’t need you telling me who I can or can’t fuck.”
Seth saw red. No matter that he’d been just as crude. Hearing the words from Zane’s mouth, the blatant disrespect enraged him. Even if it did make him a goddamn hypocrite.
Before he could think, before he could stop himself, he swung his fist, connecting with Zane’s face. Zane’s head snapped back, and his knees buckled for a split second before he recovered and lunged for Seth.
Well, fuck. It had been years since they’d gone to fist city, but as pissed off as Seth was, he could use a good barnyard brawl.
Jasmine woke to sunshine streaming in through the window. Automatically she felt for Zane but once again was greeted by a cold, empty spot. She sighed and rolled over for a moment, hugging his pillow to her. One morning she’d like to actually wake in his arms.
Reluctantly, she pushed herself up and swung her legs over the side. Her head felt a little muggy, but at least it wasn’t hurting. She searched around for her shirt and found it half hidden underneath the bed. She rose and pulled it on before padding to the door.
She cracked it and nervously looked out before slipping into the hallway. She hurried toward her bedroom and into the shower. Thirty minutes later, she collected her camera and headed downstairs to the small study that housed the computer.
Her hands shook as she sat down and fumbled with the USB cord that would enable her to download pictures from her camera to the computer.
She was scared to death to face Zane. And Seth. Seth had rejected her, and while Zane hadn’t at first, he’d made it clear he considered what had happened a big mistake. She was making a first-class mess of her intentions, and worse, she was failing miserably in her quest.
After downloading her pictures, she checked her email, grateful once again that Seth had installed satellite internet for her.
She smiled as she read a quick note from Cherisse. The bubbly French girl always managed to cheer her up. She typed a quick response and sent it on its way.
As she scanned the rest of the emails in her inbox, her gaze focused on the subject header of one. Wildscapes Magazine. She clicked to open it and skimmed over the message.
Photos that she’d taken while in France, as well as older photos of the West Texas landscape, had been accepted for publication by Wildscapes. In addition they were very interested in other photos she might have and would like to know if she would consider a regular feature for their magazine—“Without Words”, a photo column on a monthly basis.
She sat, stunned, then read back over the message again. Truthfully, she’d submitted them on a lark, in a moment of weak indecision before she’d determined that she would return to Sweetwater Ranch.
She eased back in her chair and stared for another long moment before sliding the cursor over the “X” to close the email program. She unplugged her camera and set it to the side then rolled her chair backwards to get up.
She should be excited. But how could she greet the news with enthusiasm when it would mean leaving Sweetwater? And the Morgan brothers.
Paris had been a catalyst for so many things. She’d gone there to find herself. She’d experimented, thrown herself into life away from the ranch, made new friends. But she’d been unable to escape the inevitable. She loved Seth and Zane. Would always love them. That wouldn’t go away with time, distance or newfound maturity.
She trudged down the stairs, hungry and wanting the comfort of Carmen’s company. But when she walked into the kitchen, she was greeted by a sniff and a reproving look.
Not what she needed today. Was everyone mad at her? She plopped down onto a barstool and propped her elbows on the counter.
“Good morning to you, too, mamacita.”
Carmen stared balefully at her. “Hungry, niña? You’re awfully late for breakfast. I should make you wait for lunch.”
Jasmine sighed. “Why are you angry with me, mamacita?”
Carmen ignored her and bustled around the kitchen plating some of the leftovers from breakfast. She thrust the plate into the microwave and stood, hands on her hips as she waited for the time to lapse.
The door from the patio opened and shut and Jasmine swiveled on the stool to see who had come in. She gasped when she saw Zane standing there, rumpled, dirty, his mouth bleeding and his eye blackened.
Before she could open her mouth to ask him what the hell had happened, his lips tightened, and he strode out of the kitchen in the opposite direction.
She turned back to Carmen. “What on earth happened?”
Carmen huffed and plunked the plate down in front of Jasmine. “You are what happened, niña. You and these games you are playing with the boys.”
Jasmine shook her head in confusion.
“They fight,” Carmen said in exasperation. “I go outside and the two of them are rolling around in the dirt trying to kill one another. It’s no way for brothers to behave.”
Jasmine felt sick. She shoved the plate away, unable to stomach the thought of eating. She buried her face in her hands. “Oh, God, I never meant for this to happen.”
Jasmine heard the ruffle of Carmen’s skirts, and then she was enfolded in Carmen’s arms. Carmen coaxed her hands from her face and cupped her chin in her hand.
“You’re playing with fire. You know this, eh niña?”
“I love them, mamacita. What would you have me do?”
Carmen’s face softened and she hugged Jasmine to her. “I know you do. But these boys. They’re stubborn. They won’t be easy to win over.”
Jasmine nodded as Carmen moved back toward the stove to stir the chili she was making.
“What are your plans, niña? Now that you are home from Paris. What will you do now?”
The earlier email floated through Jasmine’s memory. She leaned forward, resting her chin on her upturned palm. “I don’t want to do anything. Is it so terrible that I don’t want my life to take me away from here? This is my life. It’s where I belong.”
Carmen walked over to stand close to her once more. “Listen to me, niña. You can’t put all your eggs in one basket. Because if that basket falls, all the eggs break and you have no more. You can’t put your life on hold waiting on something that may never happen.”
Jasmine winced even as she knew Carmen spoke the truth. She did have to plan for a future that may not include Seth or Zane.
“Oh, Carmen, what am I going to do?”
She let all the pent-up despair spill over. Carmen hugged her close and stroked her hair soothingly. “You’re young, niña. Young and beautiful. You have your entire life ahead of you.”
“But I don’t want a life without them,” Jasmine said quietly. “I realize how dramatic it may sound. You think I’m young. I don’t know my mind. That this is all some crush that will fade as soon as the next hunky guy comes along.”
She broke off but Carmen remained silent, waiting patiently for her to have her say.
“I left here, mamacita. I left here with the intention of not coming back. I didn’t think I could ever have what I wanted, that there wasn’t a way for me to win their love. I wanted to exert my independence. Make them see me not as someone they were stuck taking care of, but as a strong, independent woman capable of making it on her own.
“But my time in Paris only made things clearer to me. I was being a coward by