"Not for sex, that was only half 'specific Isa. "It's as if he needed to keep vital energy in the world, to prolong its existence, and drew from the lives in this energy development that withdrew from Matilda and still pulls our bodies after having fertilized."
"It's terrible," Simon is surprised that he had done a pretty good idea, but now, hearing the reasoning of Isa, perceives the world around him as if he was falling down and rolling into a bottomless vortex.
"Absolutely, but the sad truth. Not surprisingly, when he shows himself in his true form he is old and ailing, because it's reached the limit, it can not stand by without new life. "
"But .." A thousand questions crowding the minds of Simon, who does not know where to start. "Anyway, I said" tergiversa, returning to its attempt to overview the situation, as a rational footing in a stormy sea of madness. "He exploited for his purposes, and Matilda Matilda lost jumped on her daughter Mary. He changed his style, though, because he decided to take it with no more than one person, but with the daughters of the descendants of Mary, when they were young and ... "
"Not with her daughters, but with the eldest daughter. This is also part of our destiny, as he called my mom, or of our inheritance, as I call it. By Maria on, there was our ancestor who had no other children besides the one conceived by him and never born. And the firstborn of each has always been a female. You do not represent an exception, as you see. "
Simon is still in awe: it seems to be no limit for the worst. "This to me is more difficult to believe," objects. "It's one thing to believe that he do what he does, but how can he have influence on our choices and the very nature? How can we decide whether to get married, if we have children and that sex will be? "
"If I knew I would have said. And not having an explanation, you may think it's just a coincidence. But I say it a coincidence that lasts for half a millennium is not worthy of the name. "
Simona does not respond.
"And another thing, another rule. Only the eldest is her victim, and not in a random time of life, but during the nineteenth birthday. Still, do not ask me why, even if an idea could be that, as the daughter of Mary was nineteen at the time of the fire, he might have chosen that moment for all of them. "
Simon returns with his mind until 1984, then a few months ago when Roberto and Mattia had celebrated nineteen years of Cristina. If only he knew ... "Why you told me all alone now?" Here's the question that among all winning the battle to emerge first. "The first girl told the story to his daughter shortly after the fact and the grandmother, from what I say, put you up to date immediately."
Isa was afraid this question. "There I was coming, 'she begins to take time. "I could have been mistaken, but I did it for your own good. For your life. "
***
"No mother, during all these years, has never dared to warn her daughter before the fact to happen," says Isa.
"Why?" Asks Simon. "Anyway, I'm not saying you should have warned me before, but you should calm down after , instead of leaving me with a question of being mad. In fact, you've really tried to upset the mind, because I've even brought to the gynecologist, you undoubtedly know that there would not remain a trace of anything. Why? "
"Wait, please, do not fret. And do not scream, I think that Cristina is out of the bathroom. "
Simona pricks up his ears and probably think it's really so. He hears footsteps in bare feet and a door closing.
"No one ever told the story before the time for fear of doing the same order that Mary did."
"It was a rule too? He decided he ? "
"This was no better or ... is an unwritten rule. No one has ever tried to prove otherwise, the stakes were too high. After all, Mary had tried to come between him and his drawings and had come out wrong, then everyone would do the same - to inform and groped his daughter in the hope that the resist would be a clear attempt to turn against him - faced a similar end. Death. "
"I keep saying, okay, but why did not you say to me even then?"
Isa sighed. "Do ... tries to make an effort and return you back in the state of mind that you had at nineteen, when you were a kid believes he can change the world, driven by his ideals. Can you? "
"I can do it," confirms Simon without hesitation. "Why have not changed much since then. Not until today, at least. "
"Well, then think of returning home after Fabrizio made you what you did and feel of this story. What would you do? "
Simon reflects. "I'd been blinded with rage. I wanted to destroy everything that I had come in sight. And surely, even though I knew it was useless, I tried Fabrizio far and wide to smash his face, he was a human being or not. "
Isa nods. "And then?"
Simon reflects. Think you understand where he wants to end up his mother, but not lie. "And then I spent my life trying to rescue me and my offspring from this silly burden."
"Right here I wanted," said Isa. "You were different. Perhaps not unlike the character level, not only, but also because it came at a time when the role of women has changed. You grew up in a world where women have learned to say no. All those who came before you and us, but I myself, have accepted their fate certainly not willingly, but realizing that fighting would not accomplish anything. But you've shown since girl tend to rebel against injustice and this ... this made me go do not know how many sleepless nights, especially when approaching the decisive moment of your nineteenth birthday. On the one hand I felt the need to tell you everything, as usual, not to make you feel worse than it should and not betray your trust ... but the other was afraid for your health, because the anger and the desire of rebellion would lead you to death. Unnecessarily. "
"Why unnecessarily? It is useless to try to avoid suffering as that which has befallen us? "
"In vain, because nothing will ever change that. You would never be able to not marry Roberto or anyone else in his place. You would not have avoided having a daughter. And you can not subtract Cristina to his fate. "
"Why not?"
"Why tell the story if he will kill you and still will complete your project with Cristina. Not to mention that, without having lived the experience, Cristina does not trust you ever. And if you believe and you were able to survive its wrath, I am convinced that he would find a way to pull the energy it needs. Because if you think about it, how powerful, does not need corteggiarci as a romantic lover: it could simply smashing against a wall and get the same violentarci and what he wants. "
"Then why ..."
"I think it does to make us suffer more. When you were with Fabrizio did not have the impression that they arrived, he had found true love, the man of your dreams? "
Simon nods.
'That's the disappointment and frustration that follow the ... are made even worse nightmare. When it rips my life, actually takes also part of our trust in Love. And so part of our happiness. I was never the same after Francis and even your father did not love as I loved him. I was no longer capable. "
"True," confirms Simon but is merely in the mind. "It is said that should tell you what I told you, to distract from Daniel Simon" says.
"Simon, give up, do not make me regret ..."
"There are other ways. Can I make her understand that it is not the right guy for her, her comparison with my experience with Fabrizio, convince her that it is only temporary and blinded by a crush ... "
"It would not do anything," repeated Isa, warming and raising his voice more than it wants. "Would risk life and for what? Not worth it. "
Simon felt an explosion of anger and disappointment. "As it is not worth the trouble? We are talking about Cristina, mother of his ... "
"Think" break the Isa. "Beyond the dark forces behind it, reflects on the fact itself. It is a minute. A horrible feeling, it is true, a bit 'of pain, but deep passes in a moment. How can you put your life at stake for so little? "
"But what are you saying? Have yourself a minute ago you said that we feel bad about making us fall in love and then putting in front of the awf
ul truth, you yourself have said that has affected your life forever and do not tell me it does not hurt ! "
"One thing is to realize that something is wrong and painful to play another one's life to try to correct it, when you know perfectly well that he hopes not. And I said that does not hurt, just ... "
"And then there's still" Simona spits.
Isa crashes, gasp, not only for the enthusiasm with which he is discussing, but for what he is reading in the eyes of his daughter. "What do you mean?"
"I told you everything all right? 'Simona the presses. "There's more. Another rule. "
"Do not go any further, I do not know what you're talking about," Isa tries to defend himself.
"You mean it's just a case that ..."
"MOM!"
Cristina yells from the top of the stairs. Without knowing it, he interrupted the discussion in one of the most important, preventing Simona to find the last piece which is missing for a complete picture of the situation. He will never have occasion to discuss in private with her mother, because in four days died in an accident.
"Mom, where did you put my new vest?"
"I've washed, have stretched" says Simona. Isa is watching with awed expression.
"I recommend" whispers Isa, alarmed by the possible actions of her daughter, who has just proved he did not put judgment in the last twenty years, but at the same time raised by the unexpected interruption of the speech.
"Do not promise anything," said coldly, Simona, turning around and heading upstairs.
***
" The rest you know "Erika continued, reading the last lines from the notebook of Simona. Roberto still sat on the bed, the expression of those who had enough, but it was still not ready for anything. " I hope now you can understand my words of fire to Daniel and the allusion to his plan to take to bed and nothing else. I was trying to protect you, to warn you, but I realized that it was no where to turn away and let us not talk unnecessarily. Now do me any questions that you are at your disposal, so we have to find a solution. My grandmother told me that there is no way out, but I am convinced of the contrary. And we do it, whatever the cost, because I remain convinced that there will be other than what we have to suffer, there are other rules. Please do not blame me. I realize that you've read amazing things, but I would not have interest in writing if they were not true. Probably, in some attitudes that have had against Daniel you will be recognized and those in my grandmother's. I just hope it's not too late. I love you. "
A deep silence fell in the room for a few minutes. Erika reread some parts of the text, flipping back the pages, as though that operation could help her better understand and accept the truth. Robert kept his position, giving the impression of being able to stand firm for ever motionless, staring, thinking.
"What do you think?" Erika finally asked, putting the book closed on the nightstand.
"What it all comes back," remarked Roberto, vague.
"How ... in what sense? You mean the story I told myself, when Simon was a girl and ... "
"Yes, but not only. Back to what I found on Cristina, its likely pregnant ... at this point would really be too late, though Cristina is currently consulting on the sites because pregnancy is suspected of being pregnant. Simon became aware of the truth when the damage was done. If he had known, perhaps, would not ... "He dismissed the thought with a gesture of the head: it was useless to resort to if . «Back to what I said Matthias, on the evening of the rosary. I had not given importance, but at this point ... told me that he saw Daniel smiling. He had his revenge, he was happy. He made her pay to Simon for not respecting the rules and was about to complete his evil plan with Cristina. And my dreams are back. Those women, those were the ancestors of Simon, the victims of this ... this thing, trying to warn me of ... "
"Kill them, you say?"
"So it seems. Actually, yes, I'm sure. But I do not know who alludessero, if not to Christina and Daniel. "
'O Christina and her son she was carrying. Although it is inexplicable that you saw Simona same order you to kill your daughter. "
"I said, but he was reluctant. It was the only one who said with a sad expression, rather than decisive and hateful. It was as if aware that he was the only measure to be taken, as opposed to what I suggested to her heart. Because at this point I am convinced that the way out of this hell is just that: break the line, cut the power source of this being. Perhaps he had already guessed Simona, but could not accept it, not like I do, and does not mention in the book. "
"And what would you do then?" Erika asked, incredulous.
"I have no intention of touching Cristina," he hastened to meet Roberto. "I will try ... I ... What the fuck, I do not know, this story is so ... so absurd, so impossible that ... "He shook his head. He was sweating so amazing. "The first thing we do is track down Christine, I have the horrible suspicion that she went to look for Daniel. She has a pretty damn similar to that of Simon, for this often clashed, and I bet Daniel is looking for ... I do not know, however, we must stop them. "
"And as we find it?"
"I try to phone her, maybe you are lucky enough to receive a response. Meanwhile, I would say to go to Parma, where there is a place to begin to look for Daniel would be the campus of the University, where he always met. It seems to me that Simon had told me that he lives in an apartment nearby. "
"Come, then," agreed Erika. "I mean, if I can be ..."
"Do not even ask for it, now you're in it up to my neck," interrupted Roberto, getting out of bed to look in the drawer of his bedside the phone never used, so it was also hoped that load.
The idea to take action, to do something, as he felt resigned and helpless, helped him to think less about the nightmare in which he had transformed his life and fear of what still awaited him.
***
Shortly after it learned of the terrible story of her mother, shocked by the absurdity of the story so much as by the sense of betrayal that stemmed from the silence of Isa in all those years, Simon went upstairs, directly to the room of Cristina. He had no idea what he would say, but something had to find, because he could not risk arriving too late and let her daughter fell into the trap of Fabrizio or whatever you called. As long as there was already falling.
Before entering the room he tried to regain some semblance of inner tranquility, breathe deeply and pretending that nothing had happened strange. Cristina was afraid that he could read words and thoughts in her face that she did not want to send, at least not right away, not to play for the already little chance he thought he had to reason with her. She forced herself to smile, came close to a real laugh, urging the muscles of the mouth and cheeks as if he were a ball of modeling clay, in the hope that it remained an aura of serenity.
"May I?" He asked, pushing the door slightly and Cristina's room.
"Eh?" Responded the girl, who had his back, facing the window, and was tying her bra. "Yes," when he realized that it was his mother.
Simona came into the room and closed the door behind him. He hesitated, watching her daughter getting dressed, then sat on the edge of the bed. It was time to say something, anything, but his brain seemed to tilt. "So what is Daniel," she began.
Cristina, who had just slipped a singlet and was rummaging in the drawer of the nightstand looking for a shirt, he stopped and turned in the direction of Simon with a quizzical look: he had already received a strange tone in the voice of his mother. "Yes. He was embarrassed, poor thing, I'm sorry ... "
"No," interrupted Simon, caught for a moment by a fit of anger toward the boy. He pretended shyness in front of Cristina, but she had dismissed him with that smile and contemptuous and arrogant. He wanted to make fun of them until the end. "No, not my impression. Were you more afraid for you that was not at ease, but he was okay. "
"Maybe," Cristina granted it. Overturned three or four shirts stretched to retrieve one of those in the bottom drawer. Normally, Simon would have objected to that, but there were far more serious and important issues to be
addressed at that time.
"I ..." he continued, only to avoid another silence. "Is that a good guy, now that you are getting to know better?"
Cristina is still blocked. Dropped their clothes and with a sigh eloquently stood up. He was staring at the wall above the headboard of the bed and for a while 'not shifted his gaze. "What do you say to me, Mom?" He asked.
"No, I ...» Simona immediately defended himself.
"It's clear that you have to tell me something, and it is also clear that what you tell me. "
"What I tell you, in your opinion?" The tone had already done more safely and with the first signs of fighting spirit, in response to the reaction of Cristina, full of latent adolescent arrogance.
"What you do not like Daniel" sanctioned the girl. "As normal as any boy does not like any mother who sees her daughter in love, as if I were still a child who can not judge what is right and what is wrong. You've seen a movie, I just hoped you were above such things. But I noticed it looked like before, how did you react when you walked in and I've presented. "
"Slowly, slowly, not run, I have not said anything," remarked the Simona.
"Then smentiscimi" provoked the Cristina, staring into her eyes and stretching out his arms.
"I ..." continued Simon, standing in turn, if only not to feel inferior position. He must try to assert his authority nursery, although Christina had always managed the extremely difficult, since he had entered puberty. "I will not say that I like, I do not know, at least not much," he began, cautiously.
"Not at all, you can say" corrected Cristina.
"Ok, I know only what little I've mentioned you, in fact almost nothing. But I know quite well the boys, girls have been ... "
"... Even I was girl, and these I have already seen, blah blah blah, experience," he mimicked her daughter. "Mom, you're predictable. You are reciting a script. Think about it, these things must avertele gave your mom when you were my age and I've given you a nuisance must be crazy, so why repeat it to me? Why not let the world go ... "
"I'm not blocking anyone," interjected Simon, raising his voice to block the flow of dense words of Cristina. "And I'm not making comparisons, I'm just ..." But the mental confusion, fatigue, fear and tension of that afternoon were playing a bad joke, not making them find the words he sought.