“Wait,” Abby said softly, her words choked and sad. “We can’t.”
“It will be ok Abby,” I assured her, hugging her gently. “It will be ok, you’ll see.”
“But mom, we can’t leave her here, all alone. We can’t.”
“We won’t,” I promised.
“Bethy,” Bret said softly.
I shook my head, hugged my sister tight again and released her. It would be ok I told myself, knowing full well that I lied.
CHAPTER 9
Night came faster than I had expected. It wasn’t until I crept back upstairs to peer out the window that I realized it wasn’t true nightfall. The larger ship had moved; it was above us now, blocking out the light of the sun. The sun’s rays peeked around it, illuminating its dark color, reflecting brightly off of it, but the day was nearly dark now. I turned away from the window, hating the sight of that awful thing.
“We should get moving soon,” Bret said softly.
I said nothing, there was nothing to say. The bag of food was by the backdoor. Abby was crying silently, tears rolled down her youthful cheeks. Aiden couldn’t bring himself to look at either of us, I knew what he was thinking, but it wasn’t going to happen. He was the stronger one of us; he would have to be the one that stayed with Abby.
“I’m not going.”
I turned toward Cade, my eyes widening as he uttered the words. Those were supposed to be my words; that was what I was supposed to be saying, not him. He was not going to be the one who stayed. “No.”
“It’s not going to be you Bethy.” I gaped at Cade; his eyes were hard, distant. His jaw was clenched tight. “No matter what you may think.”
“You don’t know what I think!” I retorted sharply, my hands fisting at my sides.
“Yes, I do, and it is not going to be you.”
“That is our mother!” I snapped.
“Peter has been very kind to me, I will not leave him.”
“Then I’ll stay with you.”
“No.”
“No!” I nearly screeched. “You can’t tell me no.” I was rapidly losing control, rapidly spinning toward panic and chaos. I took a deep breath, managing to gain a little more control of myself before I continued to speak. “You can’t make my choices for me.”
“Bethany,” Abby whimpered.
I glanced sharply at her, breathing rapidly as I struggled to contain my fear and anger. Even if I hadn’t told anyone else about it, they seemed to have guessed that I’d intended to stay. Aiden was my brother, Bret was my boyfriend. They knew me well, yet I felt it was Cade that had first discerned the fact that I wanted to stay with my mother.
I met his dark gaze, seeing the truth in his steady stare. He was not going to budge on his decision. It had been alright when I had decided that I would stay. I had been in control, I had been accepting of the fact that I would be alone. But the thought of Cade staying here was terrifying to me. I couldn’t leave him here. I would never be able to live with myself if I did.
“It has been decided,” Cade said firmly.
“By who? When?” Jenna asked her eyes wide and terrified.
“By us,” Bret answered. He took hold of my hand, holding tight to it when I tried to pull free. “Last night when you were asleep.”
“You knew last night you were going to do this?” I breathed, unable to tear my gaze away from Cade’s dark beauty. I had just found him, I barely knew him, but I knew I couldn’t lose him. I simply couldn’t. I would be empty without him, I didn’t know how I knew that, but I did. I would be hollow, broken, a shell of myself without him.
“Yes,” Aiden answered. “We have to go now Bethany.”
“No. I’m not leaving.”
“Please Bethy, please,” Abby pleaded. “Don’t leave me.” I opened my mouth to protest. I felt lost, hopeless, stunned by this revelation. It was more than just Peter, I knew he was doing this for me, to keep me safe, and I couldn’t let that happen. “Bethany.” Abby’s hand tightened on my arm, her grip was hard, painful. “Bethy please,” she whispered.
I didn’t know what she wanted me to do, what she wanted me to say to her. I didn’t know much of anything at the moment. “Abigail.”
“Don’t leave me. We can’t leave mom, and you, behind. Please Bethany I can’t lose you both.”
I closed my eyes, groaning inwardly at her soft, heartfelt plea. I bit hard on my bottom lip, fighting against the tears that burned my eyes. This was awful, just awful.
“Bethany…” Aiden’s voice trailed off. He hadn’t stopped because he didn’t know what to say, but because a soft rattle had begun to shake the store. Abby clung tighter to me as she started to tremble. The ground beneath my feet vibrated; the merchandise on the shelves began to clink together.
I held my breath, my heart pounded loudly in my ears. A loud, thumping bang shook the store, causing me to stumble slightly. A soft sob tore from Abby. The windows shook within their panes, the glass rattled more forcefully. Somewhere within the store something slid off a shelf, causing me to jump when it shattered upon the ground.
Abby clung to me, burying her face against my chest as something else fell to the floor, breaking on impact. I barely managed to bite back a scream as the store lurched violently. Jenna was not able to do the same; her startled cry rang out. Cade slid his hand over her mouth, pulling her against his chest as the store shook and heaved again. We waited breathlessly to see if Jenna’s scream had been heard over the growing noise.
The store pitched violently. The earth seemed to drop out from underneath it as the floor beneath my feet seemed to disappear for a moment before coming back up to stabilize us once more. Fear pounded through me, as boards began to splinter from the powerful upheaval. The front windows shattered, glass splayed inward. I ducked over Abby, covering her with my body as I tried to protect her from the cutting shards. Bret grabbed hold of us, pulling us back as another violent thump knocked shelves over, and caused one of the light fixtures to fall. Abby sobbed loudly, a cry of terror escaped her.
“Shh Abby,” I whispered frantically. “Please be quiet, please.”
Lights flashed over the windows, blazing into the darkened store. Bret pulled us further back, stepping in front of us as the lights danced over the broken frames before moving on. “What’s going on?” Jenna whispered the panic in her voice evident.
“Quiet!” Cade hissed.
Another rattling bang shuddered through the building swaying us all back and forth. Though I had never experienced an earthquake, I imagined that this was what it felt like. There was a heaving, rolling, sensation that staggered me to the side. The world was completely unstable beneath my feet, and the ground felt like it was going to plummet out from under me again at any minute.
It was awful, and it was petrifying.
A loud twisting screech filled the air. I cringed, clutching tighter to Abby as the noise grew in intensity, piercing the night with its shrill sound. Abby’s moan was drowned out by the ever growing din. Bret pushed us back, keeping us behind him as light flared through the store once more. A twisting, heaving, drop caused the floor to fall out beneath us and more boards to splinter and crack. This time I could not bite back my startled cry of terror as we were lurched violently to the side. I staggered, struggling to keep hold of Abby as I fought to keep my balance on the rocking floor.
“We have to get out of here!” Bret hissed, pulling me back as more windows shattered and the shelves began to tumble rapidly, destroying the precious contents upon them.
The whole store was going to come down on our heads if we stayed in here. A shelf crashed behind me, catching the back of my leg. I stumbled awkwardly forward, nearly dragging Abby down with me as my legs gave out. Bret and Abby managed to keep me on my feet, but just barely. “We have to go! We have to go!” Jenna screamed.
Cade was pulling her toward us, his jaw locked and his nostrils flaring as another rousing crash shook the building. It wouldn’t be long before the whole thing toppled in o
n us. This was not the west coast; this building wasn’t built to survive the shaking jolts that it was receiving, it wasn’t built to survive anything more than a moderate hurricane. If even that.
Aiden was coming at us, his arm raised protectively over his head as bits of ceiling began to rain down. “Mom!” Abby was yelling. “What about mom?”
“Backdoor!” Cade shouted, pointing behind us. “Head for the backdoor.”
No one tried to be quiet anymore. There was no need to be. If the aliens could hear us over the screeching, tortuous racket echoing outside, then they deserved to get us. There was no way that we would ever be able to constantly elude their grasp if they were that much more advanced than us. If they were that superior to us. That would mean they were even more powerful and dangerous than I had ever imagined.
Abby was tugging at me, Bret was pulling me, and I was desperately trying to elude the merchandise that had gone from being inane to dangerous and deadly. I thrust Abby at Bret before we reached the backdoor. “Mom!” Abby was still yelling but I could barely hear her over the crashing bangs resounding throughout the store.
“I know.”
I turned away, struggling to get back to our mother, fighting to keep my balance in a rapidly unraveling world. Aiden grabbed hold of my arm as a resounding crash rocked the store. We tumbled to the side, slamming off a set of rattling shelves. A silver elephant toppled off the shelf striking Aiden in the shoulder. He winced, darting away from the shelf as it began to rock treacherously back and forth. It was a heavy shelf, large, and if it fell on us we would be trapped, pinned within this store at the mercy of the monsters outside.
For a moment I was frozen as my terror over being trapped anywhere flared to hot, vivid life. I couldn’t move; my panic was too strong, too intense, and all consuming.
Aiden threw himself away from the shelf. He wrapped his arm around my waist as he dove forward. We fell to the floor in a tumbled heap; the breath was knocked out of me, my tailbone screamed in protest as we bounced across the hard ground. The shelf toppled, spilling its contents upon the floor, and us. I was able to breathe again, but not very well.
A huge crack fissured across the ceiling, a resounding bang rocked every wall of the building. Debris began to rain down on us, plaster coated the floor, covered our clothes, stuck to our hair and skin. Hands seized hold of me, lifting me roughly up. Bret’s deep green eyes were kind, worried, and terrified. He hauled me to my feet as the front of the store suddenly crumpled. I stared in wide eyed horror as plaster, wood, and nails toppled as if they were no more than tooth picks.
Bret was pulling me forward, dragging me toward the open backdoor. Aiden was behind us, limping slightly as we stumbled forward. Cade appeared suddenly, striding purposely toward us through the store. He took hold of my other arm, hurrying me forward as we fell into the warm night air. I inhaled the fresh air greedily, trying hard not to cry, trying hard not to panic as I spun rapidly back around. I pulled free of Bret’s grasp, stumbling back toward the store. Peter! My mother!
Lights flashed throughout the night, illuminating the crumbling buildings around us as it flared hotly. The awful screeching noise seemed to be moving away, but the building was continuing to crumple before us. Two by fours cracked, heavy roof beams caved like toothpicks. My heart plummeted; I fell limply to my knees, my hands clasped before me as I stared in horror at the back wall, the only piece of the store that remained.
The rest of it was gone. It was nothing but a pile of rubble.
How could we possibly dig them out of there?
I knew the answer to that question before I even answered it. We couldn’t. We simply couldn’t.
My heart was aching; my whole body was trembling, shaking. Broken. I was so broken. My father had died because I had failed to get out of that car, because I had failed him. And now my mother was dead because I had failed once again. I had left her in there, and she was gone.
I was shaking, numb with horror and grief. Aiden shushed Abby softly, as she began to weep openly, and loudly. I turned to look at my siblings, my gaze landed upon Aiden’s wide, distraught eyes. I saw the answering hopelessness in his eyes, the tears that rimmed them.
In his gaze I saw the truth. We were now orphans.
***
Abby was crying silently, her head bowed, her dark hair falling around her slender shoulders. I couldn’t comfort her, not now, that had fallen to Jenna. She had her arm around Abby’s shoulders; her head was bent over Abby as she tried to ease her sorrow. It was impossible, we all knew that. Jenna herself was struggling with the likelihood that she would never see her parents again. The only difference was that Jenna had not received the violent confirmation that they were dead that we just had.
Even Aiden had shed a few tears, he’d tried to keep them hidden from us, but I had seen them. I had not cried. I was fairly certain that I would not cry, not now, not in front of my siblings. Someone had to stay strong, and just like with my father, it would be me. I didn’t meet Cade’s gaze, I could feel it on me, burning into my back, but I would not look at him. Bret kept his arm around me, seeking to give me comfort even though I didn’t want it. He didn’t seem to understand that though, and I had given up shrugging his arm off. What was the point?
“Why did the building collapse like that?” Abby moaned. “What caused it?”
A muscle in my cheek jumped, my jaw ached from clenching it so tightly. I didn’t know what had caused it, but it had been big, it had been brutal, and it was going to come for us. Of that much I was certain. It would continue to hunt for survivors. It would be unrelenting and ruthless in its pursuit. It apparently hadn’t known that we were in the store, but I was certain that once it got a bead on us, it was not going to stop in its desire for blood, in its desire to drain us dry.
I closed my eyes, my hands fisted at my sides. Whatever the aliens were doing, whatever they were intent on they were really beginning to piss me off!
“Bethany.” I forced my eyes open. Bret was watching me with wide eyed worry. “Are you ok?”
I wanted to be a better person for him, wanted to be the person he thought I was. I wanted to be kinder, more understanding, and more patient. I wanted to be happier, more giving, and more faithful. I wanted to show some sort of emotion, other than fury right now, but I couldn’t. I was none of those things, yet Bret was certain that I was. I hated to disappoint him, but I didn’t know how to be anything different. I had tried to be that person for him for the past few months, I truly had, but it was impossible for me. I thought that if he understood things would be different between us, but he didn’t, and they weren’t.
In fact I was fairly certain he wouldn’t want anything to do with the person I truly was, because he was just too good to understand that person, and the darkness that resided within me. I was a survivor, I was a fighter, and I was hard. It was the first time I admitted that fact to myself, but it was true. I was cold and I was hard. I had thought that it was the death of my father that had caused me to be this way, but I was slowly beginning to realize that I was wrong. Jenna had more than likely lost her family, yet she was comforting Abby. Bret had more than likely lost his parents and yet he was still caring and good.
Yes, I had watched my father die. Yes, I had been young and defenseless. But we were defenseless now, and yet I still sensed more humanity in them than I did in myself. What was wrong with me? Why couldn’t I be like them?
My gaze finally went to Cade. For the first time I was able to look at him. The duffel bag with the guns was slung over his shoulder, his hand rested against the strap. Cade was a wealth of mystery and confusion to me that I wasn’t sure I would ever understand. Yet, as his dark eyes landed upon me, I knew, with unfailing certainty that he understood me completely. He saw inside of me and knew what kind of person I was.
He saw my many flaws, and for some strange reason he didn’t mind them. He saw the depths of my imperfections, the intensity of my coldness, and he understood it. I was suddenly
struck by the realization that I didn’t know what was worse. Being completely understood and accepted for my many defects, or constantly trying to prove that I did not have them, that I was a better person than I actually was.
Was it better to be accepted for being an awful human being, or to have someone believe that I was something better than I was?
Cade’s eyes narrowed, his head tilted to the side. Displeasure flashed across his features, his hand tightened on the strap around his chest. The moonlight hit his onyx eyes turning them nearly blue in the bright light.
“Bethany?”
“I’m fine,” I responded as I turned my attention back to Bret.
“Maybe we should stop.”
“We need to keep moving.”
“Keep moving where?” Jenna asked; her voice soft and forlorn.
“Somewhere.” Though I had no idea where. I just knew that we could not sit still. If we stopped we were sitting ducks.
“Somewhere is not an answer!” she retorted sharply. “We need to have somewhere to go; just roaming aimlessly around is doing nothing for any of us! We need to find somewhere safe to hide!”
“Oh, and since you know where all of those places are, why don’t you just tell us where to go!” I snapped back.
Jenna glared at me, her delicate jaw clenched tight as her pretty eyes narrowed. “Ok, easy, we should probably come up with some kind of plan,” Bret interjected calmly. “We need to find shelter.”
“I’m not going inside again,” I responded at once.
They all looked at me in surprise, even Cade seemed slightly taken aback. “Bethy…”
“No Aiden. If you guys would like to find shelter, that is fine, but there is no way in hell I am going inside again. Not right now anyway,” I amended when I saw their distraught faces. I was not going inside again anytime soon, quite possibly never again, judging by the way I felt right now.
“Well we have to find some place to hide!”
Jenna’s whining tone was grating on my last nerve. I understood that she was frightened, but I had never had a vast storage of patience (yet another fault of mine), and I found that I had even less now. My nerve endings felt flayed, they felt as if someone was constantly taking a match to them. I was hurt, I was frightened too, but most of all I was angry and she was irritating that anger right now.