And Mrs. Wibblewobble didn't at all mind some of the leaves beingoff her rubber plant. So you see we should always be kind when wecan; and if the canary bird doesn't go to sleep in the bowl with thegoldfish, and forget to whistle like an alarm clock in the morning,I'll tell you next about Uncle Wiggily and the crumple-horn cow.
CHAPTER XIV
UNCLE WIGGILY AND THE CRUMPLE-HORN COW
"Where are you going, Uncle Wiggily?" asked Nurse Jane Fuzzy Wuzzy,the muskrat lady housekeeper, as she saw the rabbit gentlemanstarting out from his hollow-stump bungalow one day. He was backagain from his visit to Sammie and Susie Littletail.
"Oh, I'm just going for a walk," answered Mr. Longears. "I have nothad an exciting adventure since I carried the valentines for Jackand Jill, before they tumbled down hill, and perhaps to-day I mayfind something else to make me lively, and happy and skippy like."
"Too much hopping and skipping is not good for you," the muskratlady said.
"Yes, I think it is, if you will excuse me for saying so," spokeUncle Wiggily politely. "It keeps my rheumatism from getting toopainful."
Then, taking his red, white and blue striped rheumatism crutch frominside the talking machine horn, Uncle Wiggily started off.
Over the fields and through the woods went the rabbit gentleman,until, pretty soon, as he was walking along, wondering what wouldhappen to him that day, he heard a voice saying:
"Moo! Moo! Moo-o-o-o-o!"
"Ah! That sounds rather sad and unhappy like," spoke the rabbitgentleman to himself. "I wonder if it can be any one in trouble?"
So he peeked through the bushes and there he saw a nice cow, who wasstanding with one foot in the hollow of a big stump.
"Moo! Moo!" cried the cow. "Oh, dear, will no one help me?"
"Why, of course, I'll help you," kindly said Uncle Wiggily. "What isthe matter, and who are you?"
"Why, I am the Mother Goose cow with the crumpled horn," was theanswer, "and my foot is caught so tightly in the hole of this stumpthat I cannot get it out."
"Why, I'll help you, Mrs. Crumpled-horn Cow," said Uncle Wiggily,kindly. Then, with his rheumatism crutch, the rabbit gentlemanpushed loose the cow's hoof from where it was caught in the stump,and she was all right again.
"Oh, thank you so much, Uncle Wiggily," spoke the crumpled-horn cow."If ever I can do you a favor I will."
"Thank you," said the rabbit gentleman, politely. "I'm sure youwill. But how did you happen to get your hoof caught in that stump?"
"Oh, I was standing on it, trying to see if I could jump over themoon," was the answer.
"Jump over the moon!" cried the rabbit gentleman. "You surprise me!Why in the world----"
"It's this way, you see," spoke the crumpled-horn lady cow. "In theMother Goose book it says: 'Hi-diddle-diddle, the cat's in thefiddle, the cow jumped over the moon.' Well, if one cow did that, Idon't see why another one can't. I got up on the stump, to try andjump over the moon, but my foot slipped and I was caught fast.
"I suppose I should not have tried it, for I am the cow with thecrumpled horn. You have heard of me, I dare say. I'm the cow withthe crumpled horn, that little Boy Blue drove out of the corn. Itossed the dog that worried that cat that caught the rat that atethe malt that lay in the house that Jack built."
"Oh, I remember you now," said Uncle Wiggily.
"And this is my crumpled horn," went on the cow, and she showed therabbit gentleman how one of her horns was all crumpled and crookedand twisted, just like a corkscrew that is used to pull hard corksout of bottles.
"Well, thank you again for pulling out my foot," said the cow, asshe turned away. "Now I must go toss that dog once more, for he'salways worrying the cat."
So the cow went away, and Uncle Wiggily hopped on through the woodsand over the fields. He had had an adventure, you see, helping thecow, and later on he had another one, for he met JimmieWibblewobble, the boy duck, who had lost his penny going to thestore for a cornmeal-flavored lollypop. Uncle Wiggily found thepenny in the snow, and Jimmie was happy once more.
The next day when Uncle Wiggily awakened in his hollow-stumpbungalow, and tried to get out of bed, he was so lame and stiff thathe could hardly move.
"Oh, dear!" cried the rabbit gentleman. "Ouch! Oh, what a pain!"
"What is it?" asked Nurse Jane. "What's the matter?"
"My rheumatism," answered Uncle Wiggily. "Please send to Dr. Possumand get some medicine. Ouch! Oh, my!"
"I'll go for the medicine myself," Nurse Jane said, and, tying hertail up in a double bow-knot, so she would not step on it, and trip,as she hurried along, over to Dr. Possum's she went.
The doctor was just starting out to go to see Nannie Wagtail, thelittle goat girl, who had the hornache, but before going there Dr.Possum ran back into his office, got a big bottle of medicine, whichhe gave to Nurse Jane, saying:
"When you get back to the hollow-stump bungalow pull out the corkand rub some on Uncle Wiggily's pain."
"Rub the cork on?" asked Nurse Jane, sort of surprised like.
"No, rub on some of the medicine from the bottle," answered Dr.Possum, laughing as he hurried off.
Uncle Wiggily had a bad pain when Nurse Jane got back.
"I'll soon fix you," said the muskrat lady. "Wait until I get thecork out of this bottle." But that was more easily said than done.Nurse Jane tried with all her might to pull out the cork with herpaws and even with her teeth. Then she used a hair pin, but it onlybent and twisted itself all up in a knot.
"Oh, hurry with the medicine!" begged Uncle Wiggily. "Hurry,please!"
"I can't get the cork out," said Nurse Jane. "The cork is stuck inthe bottle."
"Let me try," spoke the bunny uncle. But he could not get the corkout, either, and his pain was getting worse all the while.
Just then came a knock on the bungalow door, and a voice said:
"I am the cow with the crumpled horn. I just met Dr. Possum, and hetold me Uncle Wiggily had the rheumatism. Is there anything I can dofor him? I'd like to do him a favor as he did me one."
"Yes, you can help me," said the rabbit gentleman. "Can you pull atight cork out of a bottle?"
"Indeed I can!" mooed the cow. "Just watch me!" She put her crooked,crumpled horn, which was just like a corkscrew, in the cork, and,with one twist, out it came from the bottle as easily as anything.Then Nurse Jane could rub some medicine on Uncle Wiggily'srheumatism, which soon felt much better.
So you see Mother Goose's crumpled-horn cow can do other thingsbesides tossing cat-worrying dogs. And if the fried egg doesn't goto sleep in the dish pan, so the knives and forks can't play tagthere, I'll tell you next of Uncle Wiggily and Old Mother Hubbard.
CHAPTER XV
UNCLE WIGGILY AND OLD MOTHER HUBBARD
"Uncle Wiggily, have you anything special to do this morning?" askedNurse Jane Fuzzy Wuzzy, the muskrat lady housekeeper for the rabbitgentleman, as she saw him get up from the breakfast table in hishollow-stump bungalow.
"Anything special? Why, no, I guess not," answered the bunny uncle."I was going out for a walk, and perhaps I may meet with anadventure on the way, or I may help some friends of Mother Goose, asI sometimes do."
"You are always being kind to some one," said Nurse Jane, "and thatis what I want you to do now. I have just made an orange cake,and----"
"An orange cake?" cried Uncle Wiggily, his pink nose twinkling. "Hownice! Where did you get the oranges?"
"Up on the Orange Mountains, to be sure," answered the muskrat lady,with a laugh. "I have made two orange cakes, to tell the exacttruth, which I always do. There is one for us and I wanted to sendone to Dr. Possum, who was so good to cure you of the rheumatism,when the cow with the crumpled horn pulled the hard cork out of themedicine bottle for us."
"Send an orange cake to Dr. Possum? The very thing! Oh, fine!" criedthe bunny uncle. "I'll take it right over to him. Put it in abasket, so it will not take cold, Nurse Jane."
The muskrat lady wrapped the orange cake in a clean napkin, and thenput it
in the basket for Uncle Wiggily to carry to Dr. Possum.
Off started the old rabbit gentleman, over the woods and through thefields--oh, excuse me just a minute. He did not go over the woodsthis time. He only did that when he had his airship, which he wasnot using to-day, for fear of spilling the oranges out of the cake.So he went over the fields and through the woods to Dr. Possum'soffice.
"Well, I wonder if I will have any adventure to-day?" thought theold rabbit gentleman, as he hopped along. "I hope I do, for----"
And then he suddenly stopped thinking and listened, for he heard adog barking, and a voice was sadly saying:
"Oh, dear! It's too bad, I know it is, but I can't help it. It'sthat way in the book, so you'll have to go hungry."
Then the dog barked again and Uncle Wiggily said:
"More trouble for some one. I hope it isn't the bad dog who used tobother me. I wonder if I can help any one?"
He looked around, and, nearby, he saw a little wooden house on thetop of a hill. The barking and talking was coming from that house.
"I'll go up and see what is the matter?" said the rabbit gentleman."Perhaps I can help."
He looked through a window of the house before going in, and he sawa lady, somewhat like Mother Goose, wearing a tall, peaked hat, likean ice cream cone turned upside down. And with her was a big dog,who was looking in an open cupboard and barking. And the lady wassinging:
"Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard To get her poor dog a bone. But, when she got there, The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none."
"And isn't there anything else in the house to eat, except a bone,Mother Hubbard?" the dog asked. "I'm so hungry?"
"There isn't, I'm sorry to say," she answered. "But I'll go to thebaker's to get you some bread----"
"And when you come back you will think I am dead," said the dog,quickly. "I'll look so, anyhow," he went on, "for I am so hungry.Isn't there any way of getting me anything to eat without going tothe baker's? I don't care much for bread, anyhow."
"How would you like a piece of orange cake?" asked Uncle Wiggily,all of a sudden, as he walked in Mother Hubbard's house. "Excuseme," said the bunny uncle, "but I could not help hearing what yourdog said. I know how hard it is to be hungry, and I have an orangecake in my basket. It is for Dr. Possum, but I am sure he would beglad to let your dog have some."
"That is very kind of you," said Mother Hubbard.
"And I certainly would like orange cake," spoke the dog, making abow and wagging his nose--I mean his tail.
"Then you shall have it," said Uncle Wiggily, opening the basket. Heset the orange cake on the table, and the dog began to eat it, andMother Hubbard also ate some, for she was hungry, too, and, what doyou think? Before Uncle Wiggily, or any one else knew it, the orangecake was all gone--eaten up--and there was none for Dr. Possum.
"Oh, see what we have done!" cried Mother Hubbard, sadly. "We haveeaten all your cake, Uncle Wiggily. I'm sure we did not mean to, butwith a hungry dog----"
"Pray do not mention it," said the rabbit gentleman, politely. "Iknow just how it is. I have another orange cake of my own at home.I'll go get that for Dr. Possum. He won't mind which one he has."
"No. I can't let you do that," spoke Mother Hubbard. "You were tookind to be put to all that trouble. Next door to me lives PaddyKake, the baker-man. I'll have him bake you a cake as fast as hecan, and you can take that to Dr. Possum. How will that do?"
"Why, that will be just fine!" said Uncle Wiggily, twinkling hispink nose at the dog, who was licking up the last of the cake crumbswith his red tongue.
So Mother Hubbard went next door, where lived Paddy Kake, the baker.And she said to him:
"Paddy Kake, Paddy Kake, baker-man, Bake me a cake as fast as you can. Into it please put a raisin and plum, And mark it with D. P. for Dr. Possum."
"I will," said Paddy Kake. "I'll do it right away."
And he did, and as soon as the cake was baked Uncle Wiggily put itin the basket where the orange one had been, and took it to Dr.Possum, who was very glad to get it. For the raisin and plum cakewas as good as the orange one Mother Hubbard and her dog had eaten.
So you see everything came out all right after all, and if the corkdoesn't pop out of the ink bottle and go to sleep in the middle ofthe white bedspread, like our black cat, I'll tell you next aboutUncle Wiggily and Little Miss Muffet.
CHAPTER XVI
UNCLE WIGGILY AND MISS MUFFET
"Rat-a-tat-tat!" came a knock on the door of the hollow-stumpbungalow, where Uncle Wiggily Longears, the rabbit gentleman, livedwith Nurse Jane Fuzzy Wuzzy, the muskrat lady housekeeper."Rat-a-tat-tat!"
"Come in," called Nurse Jane, who was sitting by a window, mending apair of Uncle Wiggily's socks, which had holes in them.
The door opened, and into the bungalow stepped a little girl. Oh,she was such a tiny thing that she was not much larger than a doll.
"How do you do, Nurse Jane," said the little girl, making a low bow,and shaking her curly hair.
"Why, I am very well, thank you," the muskrat lady said. "How areyou?"
"Oh, I'm very well, too, Nurse Jane."
"Ha! You seem to know me, but I am not so sure I know you," saidUncle Wiggily's housekeeper. "Are you Little Bo Peep?"
"No, Nurse Jane," answered the little girl, with a smile.
"Are you Mistress Mary, quite contrary, how does your garden grow?"Nurse Jane wanted to know.
"I am not Mistress Mary," answered the little girl.
"Then who are you?" Nurse Jane asked.
"I am little Miss Muffet, if you please, and I have come to sit on atuffet, and eat some curds and whey. I want to see Uncle Wiggily,too, before I go away."
"All right," spoke Nurse Jane. "I'll get you the tuffet and thecurds and whey," and she went out to the kitchen. The muskrat ladynoticed that Miss Muffet said nothing about the spider frighteningher away.
"Perhaps she doesn't like to talk about it," thought Miss FuzzyWuzzy, "though it's in the Mother Goose book. Well, I'll not sayanything, either."
So she got the tuffet for little Miss Muffet; a tuffet being a sortof baby footstool. And, indeed, the little girl had to sit onsomething quite small, for her legs were very short.
"And here are your curds and whey," went on Nurse Jane, bringing ina bowl. Curds and whey are very good to eat. They are made frommilk, sweetened, and are something like a custard in a cup.
So little Miss Muffet, sat on a tuffet, eating her curds and whey,just as she ought to have done.
"And," said Nurse Jane to herself, "I do hope no spider will comesit beside her to frighten Miss Muffet away, before Uncle Wiggilysees her, for she is a dear little child."
Pretty soon some one was heard hopping up the front steps of thebungalow, and Nurse Jane said:
"There is Uncle Wiggily now, I think."
"Oh, I'm glad!" exclaimed little Miss Muffet, as she handed themuskrat lady the empty bowl of curds and whey. "I want to see himvery specially."
In came hopping the nice old rabbit gentleman, and he knew LittleMiss Muffet right away, and was very glad to see her.
"Oh, Uncle Wiggily!" cried the little girl. "I have been waiting tosee you. I want you to do me a very special extra favor; will you?"
"Why, of course, if I can," answered the bunny uncle, with a politebow. "I am always glad to do favors."
"You can easily do this one," said Little Miss Muffet. "I want youto come----"
And just then Uncle Wiggily saw a big spider crawling over the floortoward the little girl, who was still on her tuffet, having finishedher curds and whey.
"And if she sees that spider, sit down beside her, it surely willfrighten her away," thought Uncle Wiggily, "and I will not be ableto find out what she wants me to do for her. Let me see, she hasn'tyet noticed the spider. I wonder if I could get her out of the roomwhile I asked the spider to kindly not to do any frightening, atleast for a while?"
So Uncle Wiggily, who was quite worried, sort of waved his pawside
ways at the spider, and twinkled his pink nose and said "Ahem!"which meant that the spider was to keep on crawling, and not go nearMiss Muffet. Uncle Wiggily himself was not afraid of spiders.
"Yes, Uncle Wiggily," went on little Miss Muffet, who had not yetseen the spider. "I want you to come to----" and then she saw therabbit gentleman making funny noses behind her back, and waving hispaw at something, and Miss Muffet cried:
"Why, what in the world is the matter, Uncle Wiggily? Have you hurtyourself?"
"No, no," the rabbit gentleman quickly exclaimed. "It's the spider.She's crawling toward you, and I don't want her to sit down besideyou, and frighten you away."
Little Miss Muffet laughed a jolly laugh.
"Oh, Uncle Wiggily!" she cried. "I'm not at all afraid of spiders!I'd let a dozen of them sit beside me if they wanted to, for I knowthey will not harm me, if I do not harm them. And besides, I knewthis spider was coming all the while."
"You did?" cried Nurse Jane, surprised like.
"To be sure I did. She is Mrs. Spin-Spider, and she has come tomeasure me for a new cobweb silk dress; haven't you, Mrs.Spin-Spider?"
"Yes, child, I have," answered the lady spider. "No one need beafraid of me."
"I'm not," Uncle Wiggily said, "only I did not want you to frightenMiss Muffet away before she had her curds and whey."
"Oh, I had them," the little girl said. "Nurse Jane gave them to mebefore you came in, Uncle Wiggily. But now let me tell you what Icame for, and then Mrs. Spin-Spider can measure me for a new dress.I came to ask if you would do me the favor to come to my birthdayparty next week. Will you?"