CHAPTER 12
I had for some time past, dwelt upon the prospect of our being reducedto this last horrible extremity, and had secretly made up my mind tosuffer death in any shape or under any circumstances rather than resortto such a course. Nor was this resolution in any degree weakened by thepresent intensity of hunger under which I laboured. The proposition hadnot been heard by either Peters or Augustus. I therefore took Parkeraside; and mentally praying to God for power to dissuade him from thehorrible purpose he entertained, I expostulated with him for a longtime, and in the most supplicating manner, begging him in the name ofevery thing which he held sacred, and urging him by every species ofargument which the extremity of the case suggested, to abandon the idea,and not to mention it to either of the other two.
He heard all I said without attempting to controvert any of myarguments, and I had begun to hope that he would be prevailed upon to doas I desired. But when I had ceased speaking, he said that he knew verywell all I had said was true, and that to resort to such a course wasthe most horrible alternative which could enter into the mind of man;but that he had now held out as long as human nature could be sustained;that it was unnecessary for all to perish, when, by the death of one,it was possible, and even probable, that the rest might be finallypreserved; adding that I might save myself the trouble of trying to turnhim from his purpose, his mind having been thoroughly made up on thesubject even before the appearance of the ship, and that only herheaving in sight had prevented him from mentioning his intention at anearlier period.
I now begged him, if he would not be prevailed upon to abandon hisdesign, at least to defer it for another day, when some vessel mightcome to our relief; again reiterating every argument I could devise, andwhich I thought likely to have influence with one of his rough nature.He said, in reply, that he had not spoken until the very last possiblemoment, that he could exist no longer without sustenance of some kind,and that therefore in another day his suggestion would be too late, asregarded himself at least.
Finding that he was not to be moved by anything I could say in a mildtone, I now assumed a different demeanor, and told him that he must beaware I had suffered less than any of us from our calamities; that myhealth and strength, consequently, were at that moment far better thanhis own, or than that either of Peters or Augustus; in short, that I wasin a condition to have my own way by force if I found it necessary;and that if he attempted in any manner to acquaint the others with hisbloody and cannibal designs, I would not hesitate to throw him into thesea. Upon this he immediately seized me by the throat, and drawing aknife, made several ineffectual efforts to stab me in the stomach;an atrocity which his excessive debility alone prevented him fromaccomplishing. In the meantime, being roused to a high pitch of anger, Iforced him to the vessel’s side, with the full intention of throwing himoverboard. He was saved from his fate, however, by the interference ofPeters, who now approached and separated us, asking the cause of thedisturbance. This Parker told before I could find means in any manner toprevent him.
The effect of his words was even more terrible than what I hadanticipated. Both Augustus and Peters, who, it seems, had long secretlyentertained the same fearful idea which Parker had been merely thefirst to broach, joined with him in his design and insisted upon itsimmediately being carried into effect. I had calculated that one atleast of the two former would be found still possessed of sufficientstrength of mind to side with myself in resisting any attempt to executeso dreadful a purpose, and, with the aid of either one of them, I had nofear of being able to prevent its accomplishment. Being disappointed inthis expectation, it became absolutely necessary that I should attendto my own safety, as a further resistance on my part might possibly beconsidered by men in their frightful condition a sufficient excusefor refusing me fair play in the tragedy that I knew would speedily beenacted.
I now told them I was willing to submit to the proposal, merelyrequesting a delay of about one hour, in order that the fog which hadgathered around us might have an opportunity of lifting, when it waspossible that the ship we had seen might be again in sight. After greatdifficulty I obtained from them a promise to wait thus long; and, as Ihad anticipated (a breeze rapidly coming in), the fog lifted before thehour had expired, when, no vessel appearing in sight, we prepared todraw lots.
It is with extreme reluctance that I dwell upon the appalling scenewhich ensued; a scene which, with its minutest details, no after eventshave been able to efface in the slightest degree from my memory,and whose stern recollection will embitter every future moment of myexistence. Let me run over this portion of my narrative with as muchhaste as the nature of the events to be spoken of will permit. The onlymethod we could devise for the terrific lottery, in which we were totake each a chance, was that of drawing straws. Small splinters of woodwere made to answer our purpose, and it was agreed that I should bethe holder. I retired to one end of the hulk, while my poor companionssilently took up their station in the other with their backs turnedtoward me. The bitterest anxiety which I endured at any period of thisfearful drama was while I occupied myself in the arrangement of thelots. There are few conditions into which man can possibly fall where hewill not feel a deep interest in the preservation of his existence;an interest momentarily increasing with the frailness of the tenure bywhich that existence may be held. But now that the silent, definite, andstern nature of the business in which I was engaged (so different fromthe tumultuous dangers of the storm or the gradually approaching horrorsof famine) allowed me to reflect on the few chances I had of escapingthe most appalling of deaths--a death for the most appalling ofpurposes--every particle of that energy which had so long buoyed me updeparted like feathers before the wind, leaving me a helpless prey tothe most abject and pitiable terror. I could not, at first, even summonup sufficient strength to tear and fit together the small splinters ofwood, my fingers absolutely refusing their office, and my knees knockingviolently against each other. My mind ran over rapidly a thousand absurdprojects by which to avoid becoming a partner in the awful speculation.I thought of falling on my knees to my companions, and entreating themto let me escape this necessity; of suddenly rushing upon them, and,by putting one of them to death, of rendering the decision by lotuseless--in short, of every thing but of going through with the matterI had in hand. At last, after wasting a long time in this imbecileconduct, I was recalled to my senses by the voice of Parker, who urgedme to relieve them at once from the terrible anxiety they were enduring.Even then I could not bring myself to arrange the splinters upon thespot, but thought over every species of finesse by which I could tricksome one of my fellow-sufferers to draw the short straw, as it had beenagreed that whoever drew the shortest of four splinters from my hand wasto die for the preservation of the rest. Before any one condemn me forthis apparent heartlessness, let him be placed in a situation preciselysimilar to my own.
At length delay was no longer possible, and, with a heart almostbursting from my bosom, I advanced to the region of the forecastle,where my companions were awaiting me. I held out my hand with thesplinters, and Peters immediately drew. He was free--his, at least, wasnot the shortest; and there was now another chance against my escape.I summoned up all my strength, and passed the lots to Augustus. He alsodrew immediately, and he also was free; and now, whether I should liveor die, the chances were no more than precisely even. At this momentall the fierceness of the tiger possessed my bosom, and I felt towardmy poor fellow-creature, Parker, the most intense, the most diabolicalhatred. But the feeling did not last; and, at length, with a convulsiveshudder and closed eyes, I held out the two remaining splinters towardhim. It was fully five minutes before he could summon resolution todraw, during which period of heartrending suspense I never once openedmy eyes. Presently one of the two lots was quickly drawn from my hand.The decision was then over, yet I knew not whether it was for me oragainst me. No one spoke, and still I dared not satisfy myself bylooking at the splinter I held. Peters at length took me by thehand, and I forced myself to look up, when I immediately saw by thecountenance of Parker that I was safe, and that he it was who had beendoomed to suffer. Gasping for breath, I fell senseless to the deck.
I recovered from my swoon in time to behold the consummation of thetragedy in the death of him who had been chiefly instrumental inbringing it about. He made no resistance whatever, and was stabbed inthe back by Peters, when he fell instantly dead. I must not dwellupon the fearful repast which immediately ensued. Such things may beimagined, but words have no power to impress the mind with the exquisitehorror of their reality. Let it suffice to say that, having in somemeasure appeased the raging thirst which consumed us by the blood ofthe victim, and having by common consent taken off the hands, feet,and head, throwing them together with the entrails, into the sea, wedevoured the rest of the body, piecemeal, during the four ever memorabledays of the seventeenth, eighteenth, nineteenth, and twentieth of themonth.
On the nineteenth, there coming on a smart shower which lasted fifteenor twenty minutes, we contrived to catch some water by means of a sheetwhich had been fished up from the cabin by our drag just after the gale.The quantity we took in all did not amount to more than half a gallon;but even this scanty allowance supplied us with comparative strength andhope.
On the twenty-first we were again reduced to the last necessity. Theweather still remained warm and pleasant, with occasional fogs and lightbreezes, most usually from N. to W.
On the twenty-second, as we were sitting close huddled together,gloomily revolving over our lamentable condition, there flashed throughmy mind all at once an idea which inspired me with a bright gleam ofhope. I remembered that, when the foremast had been cut away, Peters,being in the windward chains, passed one of the axes into my hand,requesting me to put it, if possible, in a place of security, and thata few minutes before the last heavy sea struck the brig and filled herI had taken this axe into the forecastle and laid it in one of thelarboard berths. I now thought it possible that, by getting at thisaxe, we might cut through the deck over the storeroom, and thus readilysupply ourselves with provisions.
When I communicated this object to my companions, they uttered a feebleshout of joy, and we all proceeded forthwith to the forecastle. Thedifficulty of descending here was greater than that of going down in thecabin, the opening being much smaller, for it will be remembered thatthe whole framework about the cabin companion-hatch had been carriedaway, whereas the forecastle-way, being a simple hatch of only aboutthree feet square, had remained uninjured. I did not hesitate, however,to attempt the descent; and a rope being fastened round my body asbefore, I plunged boldly in, feet foremost, made my way quickly to theberth, and at the first attempt brought up the axe. It was hailed withthe most ecstatic joy and triumph, and the ease with which it had beenobtained was regarded as an omen of our ultimate preservation.
We now commenced cutting at the deck with all the energy of rekindledhope, Peters and myself taking the axe by turns, Augustus’s wounded armnot permitting him to aid us in any degree. As we were still so feebleas to be scarcely able to stand unsupported, and could consequently workbut a minute or two without resting, it soon became evident that manylong hours would be necessary to accomplish our task--that is, to cut anopening sufficiently large to admit of a free access to the storeroom.This consideration, however, did not discourage us; and, working allnight by the light of the moon, we succeeded in effecting our purpose bydaybreak on the morning of the twenty-third.
Peters now volunteered to go down; and, having made all arrangementsas before, he descended, and soon returned bringing up with him a smalljar, which, to our great joy, proved to be full of olives. Havingshared these among us, and devoured them with the greatest avidity,we proceeded to let him down again. This time he succeeded beyond ourutmost expectations, returning instantly with a large ham and a bottleof Madeira wine. Of the latter we each took a moderate sup, havinglearned by experience the pernicious consequences of indulging toofreely. The ham, except about two pounds near the bone, was not in acondition to be eaten, having been entirely spoiled by the salt water.The sound part was divided among us. Peters and Augustus, not being ableto restrain their appetite, swallowed theirs upon the instant; but I wasmore cautious, and ate but a small portion of mine, dreading the thirstwhich I knew would ensue. We now rested a while from our labors, whichhad been intolerably severe.
By noon, feeling somewhat strengthened and refreshed, we again renewedour attempt at getting up provisions, Peters and myself going downalternately, and always with more or less success, until sundown. Duringthis interval we had the good fortune to bring up, altogether, fourmore small jars of olives, another ham, a carboy containing nearly threegallons of excellent Cape Madeira wine, and, what gave us still moredelight, a small tortoise of the Gallipago breed, several of which hadbeen taken on board by Captain Barnard, as the _Grampus_ was leavingport, from the schooner _Mary Pitts_, just returned from a sealingvoyage in the Pacific.
In a subsequent portion of this narrative I shall have frequent occasionto mention this species of tortoise. It is found principally, as mostof my readers may know, in the group of islands called the Gallipagos,which, indeed, derive their name from the animal--the Spanish wordGallipago meaning a fresh-water terrapin. From the peculiarity of theirshape and action they have been sometimes called the elephant tortoise.They are frequently found of an enormous size. I have myself seenseveral which would weigh from twelve to fifteen hundred pounds,although I do not remember that any navigator speaks of having seen themweighing more than eight hundred. Their appearance is singular, and evendisgusting. Their steps are very slow, measured, and heavy, their bodiesbeing carried about a foot from the ground. Their neck is long, andexceedingly slender, from eighteen inches to two feet is a very commonlength, and I killed one, where the distance from the shoulder to theextremity of the head was no less than three feet ten inches. The headhas a striking resemblance to that of a serpent. They can exist withoutfood for an almost incredible length of time, instances having beenknown where they have been thrown into the hold of a vessel and laintwo years without nourishment of any kind--being as fat, and, in everyrespect, in as good order at the expiration of the time as when theywere first put in. In one particular these extraordinary animals beara resemblance to the dromedary, or camel of the desert. In a bag at theroot of the neck they carry with them a constant supply of water. Insome instances, upon killing them after a full year’s deprivation of allnourishment, as much as three gallons of perfectly sweet and fresh waterhave been found in their bags. Their food is chiefly wild parsley andcelery, with purslain, sea-kelp, and prickly pears, upon which lattervegetable they thrive wonderfully, a great quantity of it being usuallyfound on the hillsides near the shore wherever the animal itself isdiscovered. They are excellent and highly nutritious food, and have,no doubt, been the means of preserving the lives of thousands of seamenemployed in the whale-fishery and other pursuits in the Pacific.
The one which we had the good fortune to bring up from the storeroom wasnot of a large size, weighing probably sixty-five or seventy pounds.It was a female, and in excellent condition, being exceedingly fat, andhaving more than a quart of limpid and sweet water in its bag. Thiswas indeed a treasure; and, falling on our knees with one accord, wereturned fervent thanks to God for so seasonable a relief.
We had great difficulty in getting the animal up through the opening, asits struggles were fierce and its strength prodigious. It was upon thepoint of making its escape from Peter’s grasp, and slipping back intothe water, when Augustus, throwing a rope with a slipknot around itsthroat, held it up in this manner until I jumped into the hole by theside of Peters, and assisted him in lifting it out.
The water we drew carefully from the bag into the jug; which, it will beremembered, had been brought up before from the cabin. Having done this,we broke off the neck of a bottle so as to form, with the cork, a kindof glass, holding not quite half a gill. We then each drank one of thesemeasures full, and resolved to limit ourselves to this quantity per dayas long as it should hold out.
During the last two or three days, the weather having been dry andpleasant, the bedding we had obtained from the cabin, as well as ourclothing, had become thoroughly dry, so that we passed this night (thatof the twenty-third) in comparative comfort, enjoying a tranquilrepose, after having supped plentifully on olives and ham, with asmall allowance of the wine. Being afraid of losing some of our storesoverboard during the night, in the event of a breeze springing up, wesecured them as well as possible with cordage to the fragments of thewindlass. Our tortoise, which we were anxious to preserve alive as longas we could, we threw on its back, and otherwise carefully fastened.