“Lia, fuck!” he shouts as I feel him release into me. “Fucking hell,” he groans as we both collapse against each other. “I can never get enough of you,” he murmurs absently as he rubs soothing circles against my sweaty skin.
“Me, either,” I admit, not really knowing if he expected an answer, but helpless to deny it. We sit still joined for a while before he gently pulls my body off his. I groan, feeling my swollen tissue clinging to his semi-hard length. No part of me ever wants to be apart from him, it seems.
He turns the shower on, causing us both to gasp before the water turns from cold to hot. Shivering, he laughs. “I think we both needed that blast.” I hold my arm with the cast to the side as he washes me quickly and helps me from the shower before turning to wash himself. I remove my soaked bandages and dry off. The tape holding the splint on my nose is wet as well, but I just pat it dry knowing the doctor will be removing it today. When he steps out, he makes quick work of reapplying fresh bandages before walking once again toward the closet. I wrap a towel around myself before following him.
“Luc,” I call to him, knowing I’m going to have a battle on my hands. When he steps out holding jeans and a button-down shirt, I prepare to present my case. “I want you to go to the office today after my appointment.”
He looks at me as if I’m speaking a foreign language. “Pardon?”
I walk past him to select a loose-fitting T-shirt and jeans from my side of the closet and then return to his side to select one of his expensive power suits. When I hand it to him, he takes it, still looking puzzled. “I want you to get back to your normal routine. You’ve been away from your office for weeks now.”
He is already shaking his head before I finish my last sentence. “No, I’ve got things under control. Aidan is in the office, and we talk several times a day. I can handle things from here fine.”
When he turns with the obvious intention of hanging the suit back up, I grab his arm. “I need for you to do this. I have to try to get my life back, and that’s not going to happen as long as I cower in this apartment.”
“Then we’ll spend the day doing something. What would you like to do?” His handsome face is so eager and sincere that I feel horrible for trying to push him away for a few hours. Not only do I need to attempt to stand on my own two feet again, but Lucian needs it, as well. If I continue to stay behind the safety of these walls with him every day, then I’ll never want to leave his side. He has already given me more security than I’ve ever had before, and I can’t continue to depend on him for my wellbeing. I need to return to a few weeks ago, when he was one of the best parts of my life but not my entire world. We both need to have our own independence again.
I take the jeans and shirt from his hand, leaving him only the suit. Looking up at him, I implore him to understand. “I love you, Luc, but I have to try to shake off the fear and self-pity that have taken over since my attack. If I can’t be alone for a few hours, then how will I ever be able to leave this apartment again by myself? My last semester of school starts soon, and I have to be able to return to my life by then.” He looks so torn by my words. He’s no more ready to leave me than I am for him to go, but I can also see that he understands what I’m trying to say. I know I’ve won, and he’ll leave me for the first time this afternoon. I also know it’ll tear him apart to do so, which makes me love him even more—if that is possible. If I’m being completely honest with myself, I’ll also admit that my bid for freedom today is about helping Lucian return to level ground, as well. Being trapped in this apartment can’t be good for him mentally; he has too much time to think about the past.
He pulls me close, dropping his forehead onto mine. “I don’t want to do this.”
“I know, but thank you. I promise I’ll be fine.”
He curses once under his breath before sighing. “You promise to call me if you need anything at all? Even if you’re just lonely.” I nod, blinking back tears.
“Fuck, Lia, I mean it. I want to hear the words.”
“I promise,” I manage to say, even as I’m choking back the urge to beg him to stay with me. At this point, it seems to be a toss-up as to who will have a panic attack first when we part. I know one thing: if we’re both this emotional already, I need to make our actual goodbye very quick or I’ll break down and he won’t consider leaving me again anytime soon. In an attempt at self-preservation, I pull away and dress before drying my hair and securing it in one of the ponytail holders Lucian has provided. I need to cut up another pair of his underwear and use the waistband as a holder again; I bet that would bring a smile to his face. Maybe tonight, if I’m still holding it together by the time he gets home.
Lucian
I stand next to Lia patiently waiting for her to finish the hug marathon she seems to have going with Sam. This is the first time they’ve seen each other since he drove us home from the hospital. Of course, he has called to check on her daily, as have Cindy, Aidan, and my aunt. “It’s so good to see you, Miss Lia,” he says, clearly doting on her. “You look just beautiful.”
“Thank you, Sam,” she says in that shy way she has. Lia always has a tough time accepting compliments, probably because her bitch of a mother never did anything but tear her down. She has finally gotten somewhat used to my compliments, even though I wonder sometimes if she believes them or just tries to humor me and accept them gracefully now. “I’ve really missed you,” she adds, making Sam literally crumble at her feet. There is little doubt that my driver, and longtime family friend, is completely enamored with her. Her mixture of sweetness and innocence, especially considering what she has survived in her life, is hard to resist. She draws people like a moth to a flame, especially my friends, it seems. I am quite aware that some of them, or maybe all, like her more than me right now.
He opens the door, ushering her in before turning finally to me. “Good morning, Luc. It’s good to see you, as well.”
Giving him a sarcastic smile, I say, “Yeah, I’m sure.” He grins in return, seeming completely unrepentant. He’s been with me long enough to know when I’m kidding. Truthfully, I love the fact that my inner circle is so taken with her. I would never tolerate them being less than courteous to her, so it makes things easier for all concerned. He and I had discussed the agenda for the day earlier. I thought he was going to throw a fit when he found out that he would be dropping me at the office and returning Lia to the apartment…alone. I’m certain he thought I was an insensitive bastard before I assured him that I was only honoring her wishes and didn’t like it any more than he did. I’ve also arranged for a couple of security guards from Quinn Software to screen any visitors to our home. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Sam sits on the street in front of our building until he picks me up later.
The drive passes quickly as we were lucky to miss the normal Asheville downtown rush-hour traffic. I help Lia from the car, settling my hand into the small of her back as we walk toward the modern structure that houses Dr. Patricia Kay’s practice. She has been my physician since I was a child, although I rarely see her more than once per year at my physical. As we approach the reception desk, the bored-looking attendant hands Lia a stack of forms on a clipboard that looks like they will take hours to complete. She seems overwhelmed, but determined, as she takes a seat and squares her shoulders. I see her pen pause when she reaches the section on insurance. I calmly take the pen from her fingers and cross the section out, writing ‘cash’ below it. “Maybe I should have gone somewhere…cheaper,” she mumbles as she looks at the expensive décor surrounding us.
I chuckle as I tweak her nose. “It’s fine, baby. Don’t worry about it.” She’ll be trying to clean the damned toilets in the apartment again to pay for the appointment. I’m going to have to hire a housekeeper before she gets any ideas. She is so fucking adorable sometimes that I wonder how I ever lived before her. The answer there is simple: I didn’t; I existed. Each day for the last ten years of my life was a repeat of the day before. The only thing that really c
hanged on a regular basis was the woman I was screwing. The thought has no more than left my mind when a perfectly-manicured hand lands on my shoulder, causing both Lia and I to look up.
“Luc! How wonderful to see you… at a doctor’s office of all places.” I inwardly wince as my past collides once again with my present. I get politely to my feet and kiss Laurie’s proffered cheek before quickly pulling away. Her blonde hair is carefully styled in the usual sleek bob. She is immaculately dressed in tailored cream slacks and a silk top. Her jewelry is understated but expensive. I recognize the diamond bracelet encircling her wrist and am surprised she hasn’t managed to solicit a new one from someone else by now.
“Laurie, you’re looking well,” I say as I attempt to block her view of Lia. Like most of the women I’ve dated or slept with in recent years, Laurie is a jealous and petty person, and I don’t want her anywhere around Lia.
“Thank you, darling,” she gushes as her nails curl into my arm. I’d love nothing better than to tell her to fuck off. I abhor small talk, especially when it’s with someone who I’d be happy to never see again. She is doing her best to dart her eyes behind me at Lia. The office is almost empty, so it seems obvious that she and I are here together. “I hope everything is okay,” she says in a voice full of false concern. I feel the crazy urge to tell her that I’m here about my genital herpes but figure instead of having a little fun at her expense, she’d go screaming it in the streets at the top of her lungs. Damn, it would be fun to see her go off the rails for a bit, though.
With a perfectly blank expression that doesn’t encourage questions, I say, “I’m fine.” The irony of that answer isn’t lost on me. Of course, she didn’t specifically ask me if I was messed up in the head or snorting coke like fucking Pez lately, so it’s not technically a lie. She has now given up all pretense of being discrete and has moved to the side to look directly at Lia, who I see as I turn around is also looking at her with rapt curiosity. No doubt, she remembers Laurie’s name as the person I last dated before I met her. When Lia starts smoothing her hands over her ponytail and looking down at the stack of papers on her lap, I know I’ve hurt her feelings by not making the introductions. She thinks that I’m ashamed of her, which couldn’t be further from the truth. The expensively coifed woman on my other side could never hold a candle to the beauty who owns me body and soul. Therefore, I try to control my protective instincts as I extend a hand to Lia and pull her to her feet. I drop my arm around her shoulders and pull her possessively into my body, wanting Laurie to have no question as to our relationship.
“Laurie, this is my girlfriend, Lia.” I see the other woman’s eyes bulge at the title before she manages to get herself under control. Again, I hate the fucking juvenile word ‘girlfriend,’ but if nothing else, it scores a direct hit to Laurie because she knows she was never anything close to that, nor did I address her as such. “Lia, this is an old friend, Laurie.” As Laurie draws up even further, I decide that I’m just an evil bastard today. Maybe Lia’s right, and I have been in the apartment for too long, which is very unfortunate for Laurie.
Lia extends a polite hand to Laurie, who just looks at it as if it’s a snake while sputtering, “Girlfriend? Since when?”
Ah, the fake veneer is off now, and she’s insulted to have been replaced. As she takes in Lia’s appearance, I know the fact that she is younger is the real kick in the ass here. Before I can answer, the door to our right opens and a voice calls out, “Lia Adams.”
I turn my back on Laurie and grab Lia’s purse for her. “I’ll walk you back, baby,” I say before turning back to Laurie briefly. “Take care.” I don’t bother telling her it was nice to see her because we both know it would be a lie. I do get a small bit of satisfaction from seeing her still standing where I left her, looking like someone who just found out her trust fund was empty. Wait…wasn’t this almost a replay of our first date? And they say there is no justice in the world.
Chapter Ten
Lia
Shit, why didn’t I dress better today? How could I have possibly known, though, that we would run into Lucian’s ex-whatever at my doctor’s appointment? The woman looks like she belongs on a runway, and I look just a touch above a homeless person. I almost dropped my pen when he said her name. After seeing both Monique, who he had admitted to having sex with, and now Laurie, I see a definite trend in the type of women Lucian prefers—or used to prefer. Looking down at my jeans and flip-flops, I wonder how he can’t help but find me lacking compared to the woman fawning all over him. Dammit, even my toenail polish is chipped! I haven’t exactly been thinking of stuff like that since…
She is doing her best to check me out over his shoulder. I waver between wanting to slide down a few seats and hope that she’ll think we aren’t together and kicking him in the shin for not bothering to introduce me. I’m leaning toward being pissed off at him when I feel eyes burning into me. Looking up, I find her staring at me in puzzlement. I decide I’m skipping the shins and going straight for a kick to his balls if he doesn’t speak up. Before I can finish with my plan to maim him, he takes my hand and pulls me gently to my feet before wrapping his arm tightly around me. When he introduces me as his girlfriend, I feel the childish urge to stick my tongue out at the now shocked other woman. That’s right, sister; Lucian is now slumming. Stick that in your Botox mouth and smoke it. Oh, my God, Rose is rubbing off on me. When I extend my hand to her, she looks like she is on the verge of a fit or a seizure of some kind. I can only imagine what she would have done had he called me his wife. Crap, I would have paid every penny in my bank account to see that.
When the nurse calls my name, I gladly gather my ton of paperwork, which I’m not even halfway finished with, and turn to find that Lucian has already picked up my purse and seems determined to go back with me. I would rather see the doctor alone, but I don’t want to leave him out here with Botox Barbie. From the speed he’s rushing me through the doorway, he must feel the same way. He holds my clipboard while the nurse ushers me to the scales and takes my weight. He is smart enough to turn away until the nurse is finished. I don’t know many women who would gladly have a man know her weight, regardless of the number. Some things in life just need to remain a mystery.
When we reach the exam room, the nurse motions for me to step up onto the table and says the doctor will be in soon. Lucian sets my stuff on the countertop next to the sink before walking over to me. He raises a brow at the stirrups on either side of my legs. “This table has a lot of possibilities. I wonder if they sell to individuals.”
“You’re sick,” I giggle, feeling lighter than I have in days. Even meeting his perfect ex hasn’t shaken me…too much. Well, it does make me wonder why his taste in women has changed so dramatically. I’m nothing at all like the stick-thin, haughty woman I just met. Since he is so relaxed, I decide to put the question before him. “So…Laurie, huh?”
Instead of looking uncomfortable, he actually smirks. “Yeah, sorry to put you through that. We both got off pretty easy, though.”
I smile in return. “I think it was the whole ‘girlfriend’ thing that had her so tongue-tied. I couldn’t decide if she was going to faint or throw up.”
“I’d have paid good money to see the first one,” Lucian admits. “I’ve only seen her rattled a few times.”
I shake my head saying, “Let me guess, the last time before today was when you broke up with her?”
He cringes dramatically. “That was just ugly. When she figured out that she wasn’t going to be able to talk me out of it, she threw a fucking vase at my head.”
I begin laughing, unable to imagine the woman in the waiting room doing something so…normal, at least for a teenager. “No! Did she hit her target?”
“Hell no,” he says, looking offended. “I move a little faster than that, and she throws like a girl.”
We are both laughing over his comment when the door opens and someone I presume is the doctor steps in. She appears to be in her fifties, with sh
oulder-length brown hair, heavily tinged with gray. I like her immediately when she puts her hands on her hips and looks at Lucian with a resigned huff. “What are you doing in here with my patient, Lucian Quinn?”
He grins in return, looking a tad sheepish. “We’re together,” he says, taking my hand. “I’m Lia’s boyfriend.”
She takes his sleeve and starts ushering him toward the door. “I don’t care if you’re her God, you’ll have to go back to the waiting area. I have to adhere to all of these privacy policies they have floating around now.” I almost laugh when I see him holding onto the doorframe, clearly torn about leaving. Dr. Kay gives him a reassuring pat on the shoulder, saying, “I’ll take care of her, Luc.” He reluctantly walks out into the hallway and she shuts the door behind him. She turns back to me, shaking her head. “I swear that boy is just as stubborn today as he was when he was a child.”
I smile in answer, feeling myself relax. I’m secretly glad she made Lucian leave the room, although I hope Laurie has already gone. “So, you knew the boy before the man?” I ask, dying of curiosity. I wonder if she knew Lucian’s parents before they passed away.
She walks to the sink to wash her hands, looking back over her shoulder as she says, “Oh, yes, his mother and I were childhood friends. I still miss her,” she adds quietly, seeming lost in thought for a moment. As she dries her hands, she looks me over before sitting on a stool next to the exam table. “Luc told me what happened to you when he called to make your appointment. I’m very sorry that you had to endure something like that, Lia.”
I feel my eyes well up at her kindness. I feel the crazy urge to lay my head on her shoulder and soak up all the comfort I know I would find there. My emotions, it seems, are still all over the place. Instead, I manage to get out a shaky, “Thank you.”