She stares at me as though I might spontaneously combust at any moment, and I can’t help but laugh. “Something like that,” I tell her. I think I am getting better at adapting to her dialect. It never ceases to throw me when I first begin conversation with a recruit. I’m able to adjust in the Dreamscape, where my power affords me convenience, but it is difficult to keep up pretense when I am in my own home. Giving her a nudge, I say, “Do it again.”
She takes longer climbing down. I frown. If she is afraid of heights, this may be a weak spot to overcome. Many times humans are willing to do things in their dreams they would never do in the mortal realm.
“Ready?” she asks, and I nod, amused she feels she has to ask my permission.
Her time is better, but only slightly. I expected nothing more, yet her spirits deflate when I tell her.
As if of their own volition, my fingers find their way to her cheek. She flinches, but she lets me touch her. My heart thuds in my chest as I trace her hairline and push a lock of hair behind her ear. “Don’t worry,” I say, aching to hold her. “It won’t be long before you will outpace me.” A scoff shoots up her throat, but I won’t let her downplay who she is. “Amelia, you were born for this life. Embrace what makes you special.”
Without saying a word, she descends the ladder and we go through the motions again and again. I instruct her where to place her hands and when to use the most force to propel her body upward, applying the most efficient pace, but she doesn’t believe me.
I shake my head at her. “Agility will be much easier for you in the Dreamscape, especially since you won’t be physically present. What you have to focus on now are the movements. Athletes in you world know this as muscle memory. In the Dreamscape, such skill means survival. Each movement must be second nature to you when we enter the other realm.” For all I know we will be ambushed immediately, but I don’t want to worry her, so I leave that part out. Erobos can still influence her. They can also steal part of her soul if she allows them access.
“What is it like?” she asks, taking a step back from me and lowering to the platform. Her legs dangle over the edge, the unhurried movements of youth, reminding me how uncorrupted she truly is.
I focus on answering her, even though I would rather test our limits. She let me touch her. What else will she allow me to do? I straighten my shoulders and sit at a comfortable distance next to her. “The Dreamscape changes constantly. It mostly comes from mortal dreams, while some of the stable worlds, we call them sub-realms, are derived from imagination. That only happens when the mortal has a strong presence. Even those worlds shift from time to time when the creator changes or dies. The current terrain of sub-realms reflects modern ideals. Every mortal dreamer adds to the landscape of a sub-realm; therefore, you could walk into a 1950s café, or you could just as easily end up on a spaceship.”
Her eyes widen, growing distant, as if she has already transported. When she speaks, her voice is distant as well. “So anything is possible.”
“In essence, yes.”
She studies her hands for a moment, then visibly swallows. “Could I see Justine there?”
My heart squeezes in response to her question. She has lost so much. “It is unlikely,” I tell her, even though I want to give her a different answer. “I do not believe she had a broken soul when she passed.”
“Oh,” she says, shaking her head. “Okay. Good. Good to know.” Her body hardens with her tone.
Taking a chance, I reach out and pull her hand into mine. My pulse races when she allows this small contact. “I cannot bring back your loved ones, Amelia, but I hope to one day be counted among those you trust.”
She nods and stands up. “What now?”
My mind takes a minute to catch up to her withdrawal. Even though she is only a few feet away, the distance between us might as well be a mile. Better to know where I stand. “You must be hungry,” I say to create a diversion. “Perhaps we should break for lunch?”
“Seth?” she asks, her voice small.
I force my hands into my pockets to keep myself from pulling her into my arms. “Hmm?”
“It’s not you. I just don’t do people very well.”
This is what I am counting on. I don’t want one of my brothers to swoop in and steal her. Zed is mostly taken, but the other two are still searching for a companion. “You just need to get to know me better.” I give her a smile. “I promise to grow on you.”
She scrunches up her face. “What, like some kind of icky mushroom? No thanks.”
I laugh, and she smiles. It is good to see her smile.
He’s getting to me. I keep telling myself he isn’t Jason, but damned if he doesn’t act like him. This is just too weird. I mean, here I am with this gorgeous guy, who is most definitely real, who is most definitely into me, and I can’t even look him in the eyes.
As much as I’d like to explore possibilities with him, it scares me to think of him at all, let alone to allow myself to hope where he is concerned. People hurt me. I need to remember that. When I told him I wasn’t good with people, I was being completely honest. Friend is the real F word in my book. Although, it would be nice to allow myself to feel for once. I just worry that I might not be able to feel for other people at all anymore.
Sure, he makes my heart spasm, but that might be just lust. How can I know for sure that I have a real connection with Seth?
Jason was so kind to me. He made me feel hope when I didn’t have any. Seth has an agenda, and I’m part of it. ‘Nough said.
Done with training for now, we walk side by side, silent. I’m not exactly eager to go to his room, but it seems to be where he spends most of his time.
Is he having trouble finding things to talk about too, safe things that won’t unleash World War III on the world as I know it?
I hope so. All I need is to have him bring up our past. It wasn’t real. He should know that, yet I doubt things are as clear cut for him. I don’t even know if it’s that clear cut for me anymore. This is his world we’re talking about, and I’m nothing but a stranger.
When we enter his shrine, my chest tightens. Every time I see the pit lining the room, I’m reminded of how trapped I am. How can Seth stand it?
Even just being entombed here as long as I have has left a mark on me. Getting out of the creepy room for even the smallest amount of time has helped my focus, but I have no idea if we’ll train more today. Worse, I have no idea if he will lock me in my room again so he can traverse the Dreamscape without me.
He opens my door and ushers me inside. Heavenly aromas greet me, and only now does my hunger gnaw a hole in my stomach.
I don’t wait for him before I bypass his sofa and bound over to the table. It’s set like a fancy restaurant with a crisp white table cloth, glowing candles, and silky napkins. I’m already seated by the time he reaches it. Giving him a sly smile, I dig in.
He frowns at me, but I don’t care. It’s not like I need his permission to eat. I’m a big girl with the panties to prove it. Staring at him while thinking about panties is just the wrong thing to do, so I look at my meal instead. “Lasagna?” I ask, only afterward realizing how stupid I sound. Of course it’s lasagna. What else would it be?
He chuckles. “Don’t you like it?”
I shrug. Whatever. It’s not like I care what he thinks anyway. He’s a freak. My internal wimp asks me what that makes me, but I ignore her and enjoy my food.
Seth’s dog peeks his head into the room and gives a good whine that hurts my ears. Seth, having his back to the door, doesn’t turn around. Instead, he motions for the dog to enter.
It’s a huge grayish thing. I think it might be a greyhound, but I’m not too sure. I don’t think they usually come that shaggy. “What kind of dog is he, anyway?”
“Baltek descends from a long line of royalty.” When I raise my eyebrows at him, he gets to it. “He’s Irish Wolfhound.”
Shows what I know about dogs. All I know is this one is big. I’ve tried to ignore h
im since I came here because I bet the thing would be taller than me on its hind legs. Worse, I bet it could fit my entire head into its mouth.
It might even be taller than Seth. One day I’m gonna find out, but today is not that day. The thing glares at me as if he really is thinking about eating my head.
Seth hands Baltek a slice of garlic bread, which gets downed in two bites. Comforting.
The dog then turns its penetrating stare on me. We’re going to have problems if he thinks he’s taking off with my food. I just worked out for hours, while he warmed his lazy bones by the fire. My muscles still burn. I wouldn’t be surprised if I can’t walk tomorrow. I stare him down until a growl rises up its throat.
Would it be terrible if I growled back? I consider this for a moment, then decide to steal a piece of bread from the basket to give him.
I hold it out, and he takes it gently into his mouth. Our eyes lock again, and some kind of connection is formed. This weird sort of warmth spreads from my chest into my fingertips.
I’ve never quite understood why people dote on their animals, as if they’re their kids or something, but I’m beginning to get it. I’m already thinking about handing him another piece just to see if the warmth turns into something else, when the unthinkable happens.
He licks me. I stare, frozen solid from the contact.
I’ve never been licked by an animal. On the rare occasion I even came across one, I gave it as wide a berth as I could.
I can’t help but laugh.
Baltek must take this as his sign to attack because one minute I’m sitting upright and the next I’m on my back as he licks my face with his gigantic tongue.
My stomach erupts in this strange jubilance that’s as foreign to me as China, and pretty soon Seth’s laugh mixes with mine. Baltek puts his whole effort into it and slimes my entire face. He manages to get my arm before Seth calls him off me.
Seth kneels at my side and helps me up before he lifts the chair onto its legs.
Now that the action is over, embarrassment climbs up my neck. Not knowing what to do with my emotions, I avoid Seth’s searching stare and excuse myself. I make it into the bathroom and lock the door behind me before covering my heaving chest.
What the hell just happened?
Amelia’s laugh is the most amazing thing I’ve ever heard. The sound rings through me like a morning sunrise. No sound has ever affected me like this, and I want more.
I pat Baltek’s head and give him the rest of my food. I can’t eat now, not when we have achieved such progress. For the first time since I’ve had her in my realm, Amelia showed signs of true happiness.
If I know her, she is attempting to downplay what just happened. I will not let her justify her feelings away.
I knock on the door that separates us. “Amelia?” I call, trying to infuse lighthearted airiness into my voice.
“I’m busy,” she says. “What do you want?”
She’s already accomplished what I set out to stop. I’m tempted to insist we talk about what happened, but I change tactics. “I’ll meet you in the training room,” I say. For emphasis, I stop halfway out of her room and call over my shoulder, “You still remember how to get there?”
“Sure,” she says, her voice filled with relief. “See you in a few.”
I nod at the door as if she can see me, then make myself leave. She has to learn to trust me, and me hovering over her right now is probably not the best use of my time.
Before I head back to the training room, I let Baltek into the conservatory. He needs to stretch his legs, and this is the only place in my realm he can do so. Since the curse took hold, it is difficult for me to maintain more than a few rooms at a time.
Once inside the wide open space, he bounds away, heading for his usual spot under a large pine. He’s been stalking a squirrel there for decades. I can’t bring myself to tell him the poor thing died years ago.
I’ve got something new for him to chase, but I haven’t released his companion just yet. I called her here just before I picked up Amelia. With the portal open, she was easy to locate and transport. Animals are much easier to convince than humans. She’s still learning to trust me, though, which is essential when it is time for one of her pups to replace Baltek. His line has served me for millennia, and I intend to keep it going.
I’ve considered keeping more dogs on a regular basis, but time constraints put a burden on my animals. They spend countless hours alone.
Since he isn’t paying attention to me anymore, I leave. He’ll be happy in here for a while without outside entertainment.
I hurry down the hall, hoping I’ve beat Amelia to the training room. It’s empty when I walk in, so I take the opportunity to get in some cardio. I’m three-quarters of the way through the course for the twentieth time when her scent hits me square in the face. It might as well have been a blow for how it throws me off-balance.
I manage to recover before I do, indeed, eat rubber, but it’s clear she’s seen me flounder when I turn around.
Her face is aglow with amusement. Normally this would irritate me, but somehow, I find the whole thing funny, too. A strangled chuckle arises from me. It’s clear I need to practice more.
Now that Amelia is with me, I will have plenty of opportunities for pleasure, I hope.
Instead of teasing me like I think she will, she simply asks, “So what now?”
I consider this for a while until I come up with something that will require us to be in close quarters. If I do this right, she won’t see through my pretense.
“How much hand-to-hand combat have you had?”
She scoffs but smiles. “More than Justine wanted me to. Why?”
She’s overconfident. This will be entertaining. “That’s good news.”
“It is?”
“Mmm. Erobos can sneak up on you when you least expect it. Like us, in the Dreamscape they can take any form, so you have to be prepared.”
“Us?” she asks. “Speak for yourself, buddy. I don’t know the first thing about shifting forms.”
I have so much to teach her, but this day is for winning her trust and, if my luck holds out, maybe a small piece of her heart. “That is another thing I need to teach you,” I tell her.
She lifts up her hand and studies it as if it is a foreign substance. I laugh, and it lights my soul a bit more. Although I’ve had companions in the past, they have never affected me this profoundly. Something about this girl sings to me.
“Come here,” I say.
Her eyes lift to mine, immediately wary. I had hoped showing her that she knew me already would help speed up the process, but it may have been a mistake. I’m starting to think I should have waited to reveal who I was. “Amelia, please trust me.”
She gives a half nod, as though she is only half committed to the effort. If that’s all she’ll give me, I’ll take it. She walks as if slogging through setting concrete, each step appearing more difficult than the last.
I turn up my lips, hoping it resembles a smile, but she’s not looking at me. She’s staring at her shoes. I shouldn’t be jealous of shoes, but I somehow am.
She stops two feet away. It’s close enough, but I wish she’d close the distance between us and let me take her into my arms. My mouth craves to feel hers. Loss of the worst sort courses through me.
Dreams can be life altering, but one is always aware in the morning which reality has won the day.
If I’m not careful, I’m going to fail to recall my purpose for putting up with this training. Seth has a way of making me forget I have a brain at all sometimes, and it worries me. No one should be able to manipulate me this much.
I stare up at him, waiting for him to unleash his wisdom on me, but I can’t quite hold his gaze. I have to look away, or I’ll do something stupid.
My eyes find his lips instead, and my mouth responds with a sigh. The man in front of me is not Jason, but he has Jason’s perfect, full lips. Totally kissable. Totally lickable. Totally turning into a k
nowing smile.
I clamp my eyelids shut and take a deep breath. My heart still races, like I’m climbing the rope ladder again instead of standing opposite Seth.
I take a casual stance and fold my arms over my chest. “What did you have in mind?” I ask because otherwise, my brain’s going to give me ideas I’d rather not explore at the moment.
My attempts to separate Seth from Jason get harder by the second, and I’ve got to figure out a way to distance myself from him, while maintaining the pretense of learning from him.
Yeah, right.
Seth takes a step toward me, and I freeze. Frowning, his voice comes out fierce. “Is this your usual defense for an attacker?”
I clear my throat, hoping it will work on my mind too. “I didn’t realize you were going to attack me.”
The left side of his mouth tilts into a smirk. “Unlike in theater, villains don’t usually yell attack before doing so.”
“I know that,” I say, disgusted.
His gaze holds a challenge. “Prove it.”
All right. Never let it be said I’m unreasonable. I widen my stance, throwing my inner foot back.
Before I can swallow, his fist flies at my face. I’ve got less than a second to react, but my body’s moving before my mind catches up.
I deflect his jab, twist my hand around his wrist, then whirl across his body to pin his arm up. He doesn’t make it easy for me, though, and uses my momentum to throw me off-balance. Within two seconds, he’s up against my back with my arm cranked so high my tendons might just snap. The ache makes me clamp my teeth together, but I will not cry out.
Is that what he wants? For me to show how weak I am? Well, he has no idea what I’m capable of.
His breath heats my neck, but he doesn’t loosen his grip. If anything, it’s worse. “Where did you go wrong?”
The scene replays in my mind, but the only thing I did wrong was allow him to get close to me. Is that it? Is that what he’s trying to tell me? “I attacked instead of deflecting?”
His stubble brushes my ear and my body explodes in tingles. Holy crow’s feet, why does he have to be this close? My heart beats faster with every breath that puffs into my ear.