To keep from reacting, I imagined how Richter would look when I injected him with poison--the first time.
"But we'll be blind whenever she sleeps," Aric said. "So the Priestess keeps watch through her rivers. She has surrounded this area with water and controls the only road to the castle."
I somewhat recalled him yelling for Circe to let him pass. "Did she spare me because of you?"
He knocked back a shot. "Ask her."
I intended to. I'd been talking to puddles all this time; why stop now?
Then understanding dawned on me. "Whoa, whoa, it sounds like we're preparing for . . . a defense. I need the Emperor dead."
Aric's gaze fell on one of his shelves. "I forfeited the one weapon that could have defeated him from afar." The lightning javelin? He'd stolen it from Joules and safeguarded it for millennia. To save Selena from the Lovers--and gain my favor--he'd used the weapon intended for Richter.
In order to win me. Another decision he must regret.
Selena had died anyway. I'd chosen another man, and Aric had missed an opportunity to take Richter out the night of the massacre.
Can't change fate. "Then I will kill him. You promised that you and my grandmother would teach me how." In a past game, I'd taken down galleons, cracking them open like eggs. If I could tap into my full potential . . .
"The Tarasova will have more information about your abilities," he said. "I can help you train. But even if we felt confident of a victory, how will we find the Emperor without the Arcana calls?"
The idea of waiting to get vengeance nauseated me. I couldn't continue like this for much longer. It felt an awful lot like enduring--which was a slippery slope toward acceptance. "Lark and Circe will find him."
Lark's eyes flashed. "I've already got my scouts combing the area for Finn--and Richter. I'll merge with my animals as much as possible. On that note, I'm gonna make like a stray and get lost." She rose with her ferret. "Oh, here," she said, reaching into her pocket. She handed me the red ribbon, then slipped out of the room.
Feeling Aric's gaze on me, I fought not to react. He would suspect it had something to do with Jack--
"A token from the mortal, no doubt." Of course Aric would know. "You're taking this better than I'd expected."
He should've seen me at the gravestone. I clenched the ribbon and remained mute.
"Outwardly at least. Are we not to talk about Jack?"
His name was like a sudden gunshot about to free an avalanche. "No, we're not. I can't." Not yet.
"This is consuming you, but I'm not to be privy to your thoughts? Then you've turned your back on me again."
"Don't think of it like that, please." If Jack had been the love of my life, Aric was my soul mate. I loved this man, I regretted his lonely existence, and I appreciated everything he'd ever done for me. But I felt as if I'd lost Jack mere days ago.
The weeks I'd spent unconscious hadn't blunted my grief. When I'd had the hope of going back in time, I hadn't allowed myself to grieve. After that, I'd been too busy trying to reach Aric. "I'm hanging on by a thread here." As Jack had once told me.
"Then let me help you." Aric seemed to be saying so much with his eyes, yet I understood so little. I got the sense that he wanted me to remember something--but my mind wasn't up to speed.
I shook my aching head, struggling not to bleed out. Not quite yet.
He raked his fingers through his hair. "If you won't let me help, then what am I to you?"
Now, on the spot, I was supposed to label our relationship? We loved each other, but we weren't together romantically. If I believed that the game demanded blood and that fate couldn't be changed, then we never should be.
I didn't want to say the wrong thing, so I settled on the safest: "I . . . don't know?"
"Then Fauna is mistaken." His tone was like ice. "There is nothing unresolved on my part."
"What does that mean?" Where was the man who'd urged me to live, who'd cared for me?
"You are welcome in my home. We are allies, of a sort. That will be the extent of our relationship."
Of a sort? "I see." What were my eyes telling him?
I love you, but I have nothing left inside me. I'm a drained husk like Tess. My head's not right and won't be till Richter begs me to kill him.
Does the game demand blood?
I stood to go. "For what it's worth, thank you for the last two times you've saved me."
Voice gone low, he asked, "You're glad you didn't follow Deveaux into the flames?"
"No, you were right. I need to avenge him."
_______________
I didn't realize until later how unintentionally cruel my parting words to Aric had been. As if I had nothing else in my life?
Where's your head at, Evie?
20
Day 425 A.F.
I woke to my own cries, out of breath from another nightmare about Jack. Tears flowed down my cheeks like crimson seeping from a tourniquet.
"Twist, tighten, constrict," I muttered, gazing around with confusion. Where was I?
My glyphs lit my new suite. I frowned to find Cyclops taking up half of the bed. He must've nosed his way in here.
He blinked his eye at me. Whatcha gonna do?
I lay on his neck and scratched his scarred ears until the roosters began to crow (whenever they thought it should be dawn). Then I rose and took a shower.
Under the steaming water, I struggled to clear the fog in my mind and decide my path going forward.
Now that I'd warned Aric and Lark about Gran, I would take more time with her, chipping away at her beliefs day by day--while gleaning as much information as possible about the other cards. I might not agree with her about my allies, but she and I would be on the exact same page about my enemies.
Dressed in a sweater and jeans, I let Cyclops out, then knocked on Gran's door. No answer. Figuring she must still be asleep, I headed to the tower. The stairs were a misery on my still healing legs, but I made it to the top.
From the panoramic windows, I gazed out past the castle's slate roof into the drizzly darkness. The river at the base of the mountain coursed like a moat, looking small from this height.
I turned back to the room, surveying the sunny landscapes I'd painted on the walls. This tower was a time capsule in itself.
I sat on the bed and fired up the laptop--one present among the many Aric had given me. I'd stored my zip-drive's worth of family photos on it. Some part of me must have always known I would return to the castle of lost time.
From the bed, I could see my ballet slippers hanging on the back of the door. Aric had found them for me. Dancing for him had been pure pleasure, and each day I'd fallen for him more. I'd dreamed about him in this bed. And hated myself for missing Jack. . . .
Forcing my gaze from those slippers, I scrolled through pictures on my laptop. Gran might like to look at them. God, everything had been so shockingly green. This was how Jack had envisioned Acadiana. I patted my jeans pocket, where I kept the ribbon--
My eyes went wide. I didn't have a single picture of him. I scrambled for one of my blank drawing journals and a pencil set. I hadn't sketched much while here. Nothing had moved me to.
With my pencil flying over the paper, I drew Jack as he'd looked after taking command of the Azey South army. He'd ridden into Fort Arcana with his expression so heartbreakingly proud. He'd liked being a leader, and he'd been good at it. I would've said he'd been born for it, but his life had been cut too short.
On another page, I tried to capture the look in his eyes as he'd gazed down at me in Selena's pool, just before our first kiss. Next I would draw him within the cypress stand he'd described to me, when he'd told me a story about our dream day together: "We decided it was our place. No one else's. Because that was where we became Evie and Jack."
As my pencil moved, I repeatedly whispered, "Twist, tighten, constrict--"
"Your grandmother is looking for you," Aric intoned from the doorway. I'd never heard his spurs. "She can't
climb these stairs, so she bade me to come get you."
I clasped my sketchbook against my chest. "I tried her earlier, but she was still asleep." How strange that I could be so numb inside, but I still felt love for Aric. My blood-starved heart had leapt at the sight of him.
"I'm sure you're keen to catch up with her about old times." Sarcasm?
"Will she and I talk about the past? I hope so." In time. "But I'm also mindful that Richter could be heading our way. I need to learn everything she can teach me."
He leaned one of his broad shoulders against the doorframe. "And she will be delighted to instruct you, I assure you."
I narrowed my eyes. "You brought her here. You told me you wanted me to learn."
"After I saved your life and reunited the two of you, I didn't think her first lesson would be to eliminate me. At best, it's flawed game strategy, since I am motivated to protect you."
"I can pick and choose what I decide to believe," I assured him. "To use."
"Take care that she doesn't poison your mind."
"Didn't you hear? I'm immune to poison."
Aric parted his lips to say something, then seemed to think better of it. As he strode away, the sound of his spurs rang in my ears.
I glanced back at my sketch. When had I drawn a frame of flames around Jack?
21
The Hunter
Somewhere far in the West
"Goan to die in this hellhole," I muttered. "Down here in the dark."
I hadn't choked down anything but hardtack in weeks, would be damned before eating the "meat." My bones were jutting, but I wouldn't last long enough to starve.
Fever would take me soon.
I shook, sweating against the freezing ground. Breaths wheezing. Dirt and salt caked my damp skin, all along the whip marks on my bare back. Stung like fire.
The slavers gave prisoners four hours a night to sleep, but I refused to pass out. I couldn't stand the nightmares, the ghosts. They were coming for me--'cause I was about to walk among them.
I squeezed my eyes closed. Yet that made the sounds of the ghosts even louder.
Maman's liquor bottle clinking against a glass. Her rosary beads whispering as I took them from her neck. Clotile's soft-spoken French. The sharp pop of gunfire when she shot herself.
I heard the folks in my Azey army. Just before Richter attacked, there'd been laughter and music. Everyone had been happy. Hopeful.
Over and over, I heard Selena's scream of fury: "Emperor!" She'd sensed Richter a split-second before he'd struck.
I replayed her fierce look as she'd shoved me off a moving horse into an abandoned mine. I'd crashed through rotted planks down into that deep shaft just as the blast had hit.
Radio busted . . . lava chasing me underground . . . a rushing flood carrying me through the mountain and out the other side . . . miles . . . pain . . . darkness . . . waking in shackles . . .
Slavers had sold me west. Now I was trapped in yet another mine.
Evangeline haunted me more than all of them. Was she among the living or the dead? I'd led her right to the Emperor. Had she been far enough away from the explosion? Sometimes I thought yes, sometimes no, tormenting myself, going back and forth.
Death hadn't been far. He might've sensed the Emperor's approach like Selena had. Dominija could've used his unnatural speed to rescue Evie.
I would give anything to know she was okay. Would sell my soul to see her eyes one last time. Whenever she got excited, they shimmered. I'd imagined them all lit up when she'd talked to me on the radio about snow. She'd laughed, and my heart had soared. She'd chosen me.
Right before the blast--
My eyes flashed open in the dim mine. Had I heard whispering along with the ghosts? I couldn't make out the words.
I darted my gaze. After my last fight with the slavers, I was still seeing double--which was how I'd gotten this fever in the first place. Desperate to escape, squinting in the dark, I'd swung my pickax at the lock on one of my ankle cuffs.
Fucking missed.
I'd gouged out a good chunk of flesh. At best, half of my leg would be lost to infection. What use would the overseers have for a slave who couldn't mine salt? None. They'd slit my throat and feed me to the rest.
Probably why the other prisoners avoided me.
'Cause I was already dead.
The whisper returned: "Hunter."
The hallucinations were getting worse. Losing my mind right along with my leg.
"Hunter, Hunter, Hunter."
Sounded so real. I wanted to yell, "I ain't the hunter!" The hunter was the idiot who got all those people killed. The idiot who might've gotten Evie killed.
"Hunterrrrrr."
"Va t'en! Laisse-moi tranquille!" Go away! Leave me alone!
"HUNTERRRRRR!"
I shot upright from the dirt. Damn near blacked out. Was that . . . the Fool's voice?
22
The Empress
Cold rain fell outside, but Gran and I were warm in her lavish sitting room in front of the roaring fire.
If the flames reminded me of Jack, I gave no outward sign, numb again after this morning. I'd furiously filled half a notebook with sketches of him.
Gran sipped from her teacup. Though I sensed a nervous energy in her, she looked more exhausted than yesterday.
She nodded toward the fancy tea tray, with its cheese and fruit selections. "Despite all of Death's faults, he does provide some perks."
"He's definitely equipped to ride out an apocalypse in style." The inside of the castle was as luxurious as the outside was spooky.
The Flash had charred its gray stone walls with black streaks. Fog seemed trapped on the grounds. Flickering gas lamps lit the courtyard, the training yard, and the long winding drive.
I remember thinking this castle was haunted by Death. By his loneliness. I told Gran, "You could call him Aric, you know. His name is Aric Dominija."
She shrugged. "I know. Death introduced himself when he picked me up."
So much for my little attempt at humanizing him.
"When I first got here, I snooped around," she said. "And I asked Paul questions. We talked a lot." She sounded as if she liked the guy. Paul was about twenty-six or so, with buzz-cut black hair. His blue eyes were widely spaced, and he had a toothy grin that made him approachable. "He told me Death calls this place Lethe, named after one of the five rivers in Hades, the river of forgetfulness. Do you know why?"
I'd called this place the castle of lost time, which hadn't been too far off the mark. "It is close to lethal. But I don't know for certain." Aric was such a stickler for meanings and details, I could be sure he'd picked the name for a reason.
In the past, he'd told me he never wanted to forget my previous betrayals. But in the agonizing centuries between games, he'd smoked opium, had probably yearned to forget.
"The knight prepared this place for just about every catastrophe," Gran said. "It's out of the flood zone, and away from nuclear fallout sectors. There are thick metal shutters to cover every window. I even found copper plating in the walls to shield against electrical storms."
With no sun and the temperatures dropping, this castle was a self-sustaining oasis. I pictured it as a spaceship on a barren moon, with the only life support around: crops and livestock, clean water, sunlamps, filtered air, and tankers of fuel.
Too bad it couldn't withstand a helicopter missile attack. Or a volcano.
Gran reached for the teapot to top off her cup. "We're not close to active magma, so if the Emperor attacks, he will have to spill blood to generate his own lava."
Richter created it with his blood? "The way I generate plants when none are around?" The way the Lovers had created their carnates.
Circe had told me the Emperor's hands bled lava. I hadn't made the connection. No wonder he was recuperating.
Gran nodded. "Which drains your power." She set down the pot, looking fatigued just from lifting it. "There's another way to grow. I'll show you--" She cou
ghed, the movements racking her frail frame.
I leapt up to rub her back. "Did you sleep at all?"
When the fit eased, she smoothed her hair. "For ten hours. Woke up more tired, though. Stress must be catching up with me."
I took my seat again. "Gran, what if you had a stroke?"
"Did Death tell you that?" The sudden venom in her tone startled me. "Next he'll tell you that I'm losing my wits. He means to drive a wedge between us." Her teacup shook when she raised it to her lips.
"Aric wouldn't do that. He doesn't lie. He could have a hundred times to further his own agenda, but he refuses to." What had he told me and Jack? Lies are curses you place on yourself.
She set her cup down hard. "All Arcana lie. And feign emotion and betray. It's the nature of the beast."
In the past, I'd tried to seduce Aric, faking affection. Finn had disguised himself as Jack to seduce Selena. She'd lied to me, Lark too. Matthew most of all: Empress is my friend.
My denial died on my lips. Still, I didn't believe Aric would. "He told me that you would know a great many things about the game, and that you might have foresight."
She allowed the change of subject. "Nothing like the Fool's precognition. But I get feelings about the future. They guide me, directing my movements. Right now I'm feeling you won't be ready for the next stage of the game."
"Why not?" I asked, revenge ever on my mind.
"Your powers aren't mature. If they had been, you could've fought off those Bagman bites instantly. You need to practice, from your basic skills on up." She dug in her pocket, retrieved three seeds, and set them on the tray. "Do you feel a connection to them?"
"I sense their potential." And I could tell their species: pomegranate, climbing ivy, and wisteria.
"Now try to bring forth a bud without blood. Imagine them sprouting. Casting off their shells."
Shells. Husks. A withered corpse planted in the dirt. Tess's body was like a forever-dead seed. "I-I'll try."
"Once you master this, you'll be able to sense buried seeds out in the Ash. Your arsenal will be anywhere on earth."
I concentrated on the ones before me and pictured them growing. I sucked in a breath when they began to vibrate. No bloodletting necessary. A tiny sprout was budding from one seed, had gained only about a millimeter. I focused, beginning to sweat.