We’d better get you checked out. Tristan takes my things for me.
So much for declaring my love to anyone.
I glare at Johanna for a moment. Right about now I’d much rather declare my hatred. She did that on purpose. And as much as I do want to hate her for being so ridiculously cruel, the only real emotion I can muster for her is pity. She’s used to getting everything she wants, and I have a feeling what she wants is what I already have, Blake Daniels.
* * *
After a brief, yet effective, visit to the campus clinic, I convince Tristan to drive me to the body shop where Blake works. He pointed it out once as we drove by with its oversized sign out front that reads Joe’s Automotive. It’s about twenty minutes from campus, so in exchange for hauling me out here, I promised Tristan I’d talk Kaya into going on a double date with us when she comes to visit. Kaya is a bit boy crazy, so already I know she’ll be the last to mind.
I glance down at my arm wrapped in a sling because, no thanks to Johanna’s violent jealous streak, I seem to have sprained my shoulder. But I swear it feels fine, just a little pinch here and there.
Tristan pulls into the lot, and I spot Blake under the wheel-well of a bright red sedan.
Thank you, I see him.
Tristan leans over the dashboard to get a better look at the garage. Why don’t you find out when he’s off? If he has a few more hours, I’ll buy you a burger, and we can get a head start on that paper for Lit.
That’s nice of you.
I hop out and head over. An older man with a sour face and double chin asks if he can help me.
I pull out my phone and flash him my standard Hello, my name is Annie, and I’m deaf note.
“Deaf?” He must have shouted it because Blake rolls from under the car he’s working on, and his face breaks out in an affectionate grin just for me. He’s wearing a blue jumper covered in greasy patches, and it makes him that much more attractive.
Sorry to interrupt. I flash my phone.
His eyes dart straight to my sling. “What happened?” His face fills with concern as he ushers me away from his boss.
I’m fine. I’m a klutz, that’s all. I just thought I’d stop by and see when you get off. I should have called. I don’t know what I was thinking.
Blake nods to the older man. “When can I take off, Joe?”
“Go home.” He waves us away as he heads back into the garage.
We head to Tristan’s truck together, and I collect my things. Tristan eyes Blake with a weary look. I’m not sure why, but he’s not a fan of Blake’s. It seems to be a theme with the men in my life.
Tristan signs to me. He’s asking what really happened to your arm.
I turn to Blake and sigh before texting. I was in a hurry, and one of the girls thought it would be fun to watch me fly. I would have had it down if it weren’t for that whole gravity thing.
Blake’s mouth opens then closes. The distinct look of hurt crosses his features.
“What kind of a person—girl—would do that?”
The kind that can’t have you, I want to say but don’t.
We wave Tristan off, and Blake gives me a quick tour of the shop.
“I’m working on this puppy.” He kicks the bumper of the red Toyota I found him tucked under. His eyes weigh heavy on a motorcycle to his right.
Is it hard for you to be around the bike?
He swallows hard, answering the question with a bob of his Adam’s apple. “Damn hard.”
Do you ride?
“Used to. Loved it, too.”
Maybe when my arm is better you can take me. I’ve always wanted to try. Of course my mother will kill me. :)
He pulls his cheeks back. “I don’t know.” Blake presses out a smile all for me. His arms find my waist as he tucks a kiss high on my cheek. “I would never in a million years do anything to put you in harm’s way.” He says it slow, deliberate.
You think it’s too dangerous?
“No—it’s just”—he shakes his head—“I haven’t been on one since Ben died.”
Then we’ll do it together.
“You sure?” His beautiful eyes squint into mine, and, for the first time, I see a thread of fear in them.
Are you afraid?
His lips twist to the side before he gives a sheepish grin. Blake gently takes the phone from me and types into it. I’m a guy. I’ll be the last person to admit to my girlfriend that I’m afraid of anything.
A fire rips from my feet to my temples. “Girlfriend,” I mouth looking up into his beaming beautiful face. Hell, I wanted to say it.
Blake spins me around and lands a feathery kiss over my lips. “Is that okay?”
“Yes,” I whisper, afraid my vocal cords might have gotten a little too involved.
“You want to grab a bite across the street?” His thick brows furrow, tenting those glassy jade eyes, and I want to take a bite all right.
I would rather go to your place.
* * *
The Golden Oaks Horse Ranch is acre after acre of sprawling green lawns. Multiple corrals dot the vicinity as schoolgirls take the horses out for a walk. In the distance I see a black beautiful beast traversing hurdles, training for what I think is dressage. Kaya rides. Horses have always been her thing, so I’ve been exposed by proxy. I’m more of a feed them an apple and pet their velvet noses type of girl.
“You realize when your brothers discover I brought you here, I’ll be a dead man.” Blake raises his brows as he steps out of his bedroom with his hair still beaded with water from the shower. We hit a drive-through and picked up a few burgers that we ate on the way over. Blake said he needed a quick shower because he was grimy. I tried to tell him that I didn’t mind, and, God did I ever not mind. Blake is gorgeous with or without a hard day’s work staining his body. He strides into the living room nice and slow. His T-shirt clings to his body annunciating each hard line of his perfect pecs, those well-defined abs.
You have nothing to fear. I flash the phone at him then take it back. I was serious about the motorcycle. I don’t want you to deny yourself something you enjoyed for so long. I don’t think your brother would either.
His chest expands with his next breath. “You’re right.” He holds his hand out and nods at my phone. I let it slip into his hand as he types something out. I like it like this with Blake, sharing my phone, sharing our kisses. But I can’t help but wonder if everything about me moves too slowly for him. Benji would probably give me an ass kicking for being such a wimp. But then he doesn’t have to deal with the fallout of his death. I do.
“Fallout?” I mouth.
He shakes his head as he takes me by the hand. “Trust me, its more drama than it’s worth.”
I get that it’s hard for him. But I do appreciate it when he opens up to me.
Whenever you want to talk about him—I’m here for you.
“Thank you.” Blake lands a soft kiss on my temple.
The truth is I want to talk about everything under the sun with Blake. It’s nice to hear a guy’s perspective on things like with Tristan, or some of the other boys I’ve gotten to know throughout the years, but with Blake everything takes on a new dimension. With Blake it’s deep waters where as before it was shallow ground. I’m fascinated by him in far too many ways.
My hand drifts down to his stomach, and I inch my fingers up his shirt. I’m ready for whatever else Blake Daniels is ready to give me. I untie the sling from the back of my neck and take it off.
“You need that.” He tries to replace it, but I push his hand down from the sling to the bottom of my sweater.
I don’t need this either.
Blake latches onto my eyes, and we have a brief standoff that speaks louder than any words—louder than the silence that engulfs my world.
“Annie,” he says it with an inherent sadness. His eyes tell me how grievous it is for him to take this next step with me, and I can’t help but wonder why.
What’s the matter? My emotions are rolli
ng like the tide, and I can feel them looking to crash right here in his brother’s carriage house.
He carefully takes my phone. I just don’t want you to think I’m taking advantage of you.
A moment bleats by without words or notes or whispers. A horrible ache grips me. What if this is the end? The part when he very gently tells me we could never work. A ripe anger percolates through me without warning. The last thing I wanted when I came to see Blake was to get mad at him. Ironically, I came to profess my feelings. I sort of hoped he would do the same.
If I were some other girl, you wouldn’t be saying that to me. I let my dark, non-enthused expression say everything else.
He squints out a heartfelt smile. “You’re right.”
I take a breath and glance at the door. I can text Marley or Tristan, and they’ll be here in a half hour. But my heart breaks because not one part of me wants to leave.
So I’m just Disability Girl to you? I’m deaf, so you’re playing along and being nice to me? Tears warble, blurring my vision.
“No,” he says it so loud his voice vibrates over my chest. He shouted as if demanding I hear. The vibrations, the distended cords in his neck, give it away. Blake pulls me in by the waist, his hands riding up over my back in a comforting manner. “I swear we’re good.” He takes my phone and types into it. You’re mine, Annie. I wouldn’t want it any other way. If I wanted to be just friends with you, then we would be. You and I are together. This—he taps his chest and mine—is real. I’m in this for the long haul. You are the only girl for me.
A lone tear rolls down my cheek, and Blake kisses it away before it has a chance to fall.
I bite hard over my lip to keep from bawling as I tap into my keyboard. Then why in the world would you not want me?
“Want you?” His head tips back a moment. “God, I want you.” He looks right at me, holding me by the shoulders as he speaks slow and clear. “All of you, Annie. I want your heart, your body—and, yes, I want both of those in my bed. You own me, Annie. I’m all yours. I’m not going anywhere or looking anywhere else.”
A swell of relief covers me, it submerges me in its beautiful waters and I want to drown in this joy, a very happy girl.
“Blake,” I whisper his name like I’ve practiced so many times when I’m alone. “Thank you.”
Now, it’s his eyes that are welling up with tears. “Do you know how much I love hearing you?” He shakes his head as he taps into my phone with a marked aggression. I have to tell you something I’ve been waiting to say for quite some time. His eyes press into mine. “I am in love with you, Annie Edwards.” He holds my gaze, his lips curving into a brilliant smile. I love you. I’d move entire cities, rearrange the continents to keep you safe—in my arms—he leans in ever so close—in my bed. You’re the woman I want by my side for the rest of my life. And that I can say with certainty. Blake points to himself then crosses his arms over his chest before pointing to me—the ASL sign for I love you. He breaks out in a giant grin, his eyes never leaving mine.
My lips tremble as I bite down on them. I love you, too. I sign back just the way he did. Blake’s eyes enlarge. And now I’d like to teach him something new. I hold up my hand with my middle and ring fingers down, horns up (pinky and forefinger), thumb out.
“Rock on?” He shakes his head as his grin spreads wide.
Shorthand for I love you. I show him my phone.
He holds up his hand, mirroring mine. “I love you,” he mouths before his lips cover mine.
Blake pulls back a moment. “I want everything with you, Annie.” He glances down at my body then up again. “If you’re feeling ready to move things along, so am I. This is about us.” His mouth moves slowly, methodically. “I want you to feel comfortable. I would never force you to do something you didn’t want.”
A coy smile creeps up the side of my face. I’m ready to move things along. I’m putting down the phone now. I shake it a moment before setting it on the coffee table.
“Okay.” A slow, sexy grin flirts with his lips. Blake knows how to smile with his entire being. The joy on his face shines through like the sun, and it makes me feel amazing knowing I put it there. “But how about we work our way up to the big event,” he mouths carefully. “I want to do something beautiful that you won’t forget.”
Sounds like more waiting to me. I don’t stop the disdain from taking over my face as I reach for the phone, but Blake gently lands his hand over mine.
“You said you were putting it down.” He pulls us to the rug in front of the fireplace. The flames blink on and off so quick they look like an illusion. “There’s something I’ve wanted to do for you.” Blake reaches over and grabs a guitar from the corner. That sad ache returns to his eyes. “Annie, I want to sing just for you.” Tears come to him again because it hurts him to know I can’t hear it.
I nod and get on my knees. My fingers grip the bottom of his T-shirt, pulling it right off his body before he can protest.
I hold a finger up and do the same to my sweater. Blake blows out a breath as his eyes roam over my pale skin, my pink lace bra that shows my nipples right through. I straddle him from behind and lay my chest over his bare back, dotting a kiss to his ear. Gently, I cup my hand over his throat.
“Go,” I whisper in his ear.
Blake turns and stares into me sweetly with that constant look of anguish alive in his gaze. I wish it didn’t pain him that I can’t hear, but knowing that it does makes me want him ten times more.
His fingers strum the guitar, and I feel the slight buzz trickle through his body to mine. Blake starts in on a slow song and my hand, my chest, vibrates with a warm beautiful rhythm. I close my eyes and let Blake’s body slowly rock me while the throbbing of his voice penetrates my bones. This moment, right here, is the one that binds our souls together. Blake strums his way into my life one note at a time, headed toward that special place where his existence becomes inextricably linked with mine, his life an indelible part of who I am. Blake sings for a beautiful livelong hour. These are the same songs, the same vibrations I’ve felt at the Black Bear while pressed against the wall. All those lonely nights I was desperate for any part of Blake and deep down I was afraid those quivering pulses that were once meant for hundreds of girls in that room are now just for me.
He pulls the guitar strap off his shoulders and glides the instrument back into the corner. Blake twists into me until I’m kneeling in front of him. His eyes do a quick sweep of my partially clad body. His lips curve in approval. I reach back and clasp my fingers to the back of my bra.
Blake shakes his head. His eyes never leaving mine. “That’s my job.” His grin expands as his hands find mine, and he unhooks my bra. Carefully he slips it off, his eyes still trained on mine. I lean back, inviting him to see me like this. The cool cabin air licks over my body, but my skin burns alive under the supervision of his heated gaze.
“Annie”—he shakes his head just barely as he examines me—“you are so beautiful.”
A groan emits from deep in my core. I love reading his lips. I die a little when he says things like that. Both Blake and his lips are perfect.
My gaze drops down to his bare chest. Blake has wide set shoulders like a linebacker. His abs alone are enough to hold my attention for weeks on end. I trace my finger from his neck to his rock hard stomach, dripping down slow as six weeks.
He touches his finger to his lips before dropping it over my nipple. “I’m going to kiss you right there.”
I can feel a string of giggles trying to bubble their way up my throat, but I won’t let them. I want to tell him that he doesn’t need to ask—that an invitation isn’t needed to a single one of my body parts. He can have them all. They’re all his, for his pleasure alone. I don’t need them anymore. I only need him.
My hands cup the side of his face as I rub over his stubble with my thumbs.
“Blake Daniels,” I whisper. “I love you.”
His lips tremble. His eyes flood with tears as he comes
at me with a kiss. His mouth falls over mine, hot and weighted. His tongue gently slips next to mine before we engage in a familiar dance we’ve been spinning in for weeks. Kissing Blake is a high all its own. His juicy kisses linger before he runs his fiery mouth down my neck. Blake hikes me over his hips as his mouth finds a home over my left nipple, and I give an aching gasp, struggling to breathe, struggling to get my bearings.
Oh, God. I can’t think or move or catch my next breath. My lids flutter as I glance down at his dark hair moving slowly over my chest. This, right here, is enough to push me over the edge. A pent up energy envelops me all at once, and my body demands to explode. In a minute I’m going to embarrass myself and orgasm right over his lap. Should girls have orgasms while their boyfriend’s mouths are getting familiar with them? Definitely a question for Kaya—or Marley for that matter. For now I evict the thought from my mind. My voice box trembles out a moan as I try to put a cap on it.
Blake grows in his jeans, and I can feel his hardness beneath my thigh. I slip my legs around his back and touch my hand over him there. I want him—every last inch of him tonight. There’s not a thing he could possibly do in the future to make this moment any more special. His mouth speeds back up my body as he licks a line from my neck to my temple. A soft series of puffs emit into my ear, and I can tell he’s whispering, forgetting all about my inabilities because Blake, unlike the rest of the planet, seems to see right through them. I pull back and take him in with his lustful gaze, those seductive tired eyes, glassy with red tracks.
“I love you,” he mouths it plain as day, and, in a remarkable way I hear him right in my heart where it really counts.
I pull back and sign with all my might. I love you, too.
Blake takes up my hand and kisses each and every one of my fingertips. Blake and I have started a fire. I don’t see how we can possibly put it out.