“You have to hear this next one. It’s totally the sweetest song ever,” Anna exclaimed. I rolled onto my side, trying to dodge the pile of CDs Anna had sprawled across her bed, and sat up. I found it endearing that she preferred CDs. With all the new phones, gadgets, and music players, the little, round discs were all but obsolete.
I had to admit that after spending twenty minutes in her bedroom, I enjoyed Anna’s excitement. Sort of nice to be silly and girly for a change.
Anna flitted over to the stereo and cranked the volume up. I tried to figure out its appeal. Must not be my type of music.
“What are you trying to do, kill Sam with your crappy boy bands?” Blake cut in.
My neck snapped to the side to see Blake standing in the doorway. Greasy clothes were replaced by clean jeans and a baby-blue T-shirt. Wet curls hung at his neck. However, I noted that his hands were still stained a muddy gray. As if sensing my gaze, he tucked his hands into his pockets and leaned against the doorframe. If I only I had a camera. Darn him for looking like a J.Crew model right now.
“These guys are not a boy band. How many times do I have to tell you? They’re unique. A little emo mixed with pop,” Anna explained. Blake’s eyes met mine.
“Want to go for a drive?” he asked.
My heart thumped, and I had to fight to keep my voice even. “Sure.” I glanced at Anna, wondering if she’d want to join us. It wasn’t that I would mind her company, but I hoped for some alone time with her brother.
She wagged a finger at Blake. “You better drive careful. I don’t think she wants to go a hundred miles per hour.”
“Yes, Mom.”
I glanced at him. “Should I be worried?”
“Naw,” he drawled back at me.
“Whatever, Blake.” Anna’s hand flew to her hips. I grinned. Got to give the girl an A for being so passionate about everything.
Blake’s eyes danced back at me. “Come on.” His crooked grin coaxed me to my feet. Five minutes later, I snapped my seatbelt in, double-checking that it was secure. Blake turned the heater on low, but the air coming out was still cold.
My stomach flipped within me as he slid the key in and hit the clutch.
“Don’t worry. I won’t go that fast, okay?”
I gave him a nervous laugh. It’s not the speedometer I’m worried about. More like what could happen on this drive. I pressed my palms on my jeans, trying to push all the possibilities from my mind.
He shot a glance my way and chuckled. “What’s wrong? You’ve ridden with me thousands of times.”
Exactly, to and from school. But where are we going now? I hoped he attributed my odd behavior to Anna’s warning.
“Yes, well, that was before I knew about your lead foot,” I managed.
He gave me a wink and shifted into gear, the car lurching to life. Within seconds, we were on a county road heading north, the hunk of metal we rode in purring as it hugged the gentle turns in the road. I tucked my hands under my thighs, staring out my window. Autumn colors swirled by, broken up by the occasional house, wooden fence, or barn.
Blake flicked his stereo on. “Now, this is real music.”
I instantly liked the unfamiliar song; the slow beat matched the singer’s smooth tone. I wanted to tease him, say how he’d been wrong, but everything about the moment was too perfect. Yep, this isn’t like riding to school. I glanced over, and our eyes met. He’s different somehow…
My face flushed and I stared ahead, recognizing our location. “Heading to Baker’s Bridge?” I asked. A local hot spot in the summer, the bridge was usually packed with teenagers sunbathing on the rocks and jumping off the cliffs into the rushing Animas River.
“Yeah, is that okay?”
“Sure.” I shifted in my seat and then almost gasped when I felt a strange sensation spread across my shoulder blades. Oh, please no! Not now! My heart’s thumping was no longer over Blake maybe kissing me. I was terrified of transforming again, wings and all. Maybe Blake won’t freak out too bad…
I wrapped my arms around myself, bracing for the change.
Blake glanced over. “Are you warm enough?”
“Uh, yeah, I’m good.” Just about to pop wings, no biggie.
The car slowed down, and he peeked over at me again. “Sorry, I didn’t realize how fast I was going.”
Guess I look pretty nervous. I forced a grin. I might as well act normal until my wings made their grand appearance. “No worries, I’ve had a good life. But seriously, you’re going to kill yourself driving so fast.”
“Not likely.”
“Why do all boys think they can’t get hurt?” I wasn’t sure why I was turning all motherly on him. So not sexy. Not that I was an expert in that department.
“Oh, I can get hurt, but it’s been a long, long time. Trust me. We’re fine.” He glanced at me. “Just relax.”
“I am,” I lied.
His hand reached over and secured mine, tugging it off my lap and pulling it closer to him, where he rested our intertwined fingers on his thigh. I swallowed hard, his hand warming mine. The strange feeling in my back ebbed as adrenaline trickled through my veins, my skin tingling where we touched. I inhaled deeply, relieved I might live another day as a normal teenage girl, taking a car ride with a boy.
I tried to allow myself to enjoy the moment. The stereo’s music rolling with the bends in the road, the scent of the clean leather seats, and the warm heater vents blowing on my face. If this isn’t a date, I’m stumped. I’d never felt anything like this before, definitely not with Jeremy. Every sense in my body felt awakened and on edge.
Should I tell him the truth? I needed to talk to someone about it. My heart stirred. And I like him… a lot. I chewed on my lower lip and glanced over at him. His eyes were on the road, one hand hooked on the top of the steering wheel.
I opened my mouth, ready to let the words fly, when he asked, “Want to get out and walk around?”
I peered out my window. I’d been so wrapped up in my thoughts that I hadn’t realized we’d arrived. “Sure.”
He parked and turned the key. I knew he had to let my hand go to get out of the car, but I still didn’t want him to. He gave my fingers a quick squeeze and released my hand. We climbed out, and I realized how close I’d been to divulging everything.
“You going to be warm enough?” he asked.
“I’m fine. I didn’t grow up on the beach like you, this is nothing.” As soon as his eyes were diverted, I zipped up my jacket. Cold is still cold.
He came around the car to me, and I hoped he’d reach for my hand again. He seemed to hesitate and then shoved them into his pockets. Disappointed, I slid mine deep into my jacket as well.
“Have you ever jumped off the bridge?” he asked as we meandered closer to the cement bridge wall.
“No, and I never will.”
“Really? Why not? Looks fun to me.”
We stayed close to the side of the bridge, avoiding the passing cars. The shoulder offered a small space to walk along. I peered over the wall at the water rushing below.
“Dare you to do it now then,” I joked.
“Okay.” I wanted to roll my eyes at his crooked grin, but he actually lifted his foot to the wall’s edge, hoisting himself up.
The thought of him entering the icy water below made my stomach sink to my knees. Panicked he’d follow through with it, I grabbed his waist from behind and tugged back on him.
“Wait! What are you doing? I was kidding!” I yelled at his backside.
I could hear him chuckling, but I didn’t let go. Stupid boy! My arms formed an awkward cocoon around his middle.
He stepped back down and turned around fast, leaving me still embracing him. “If you wanted to hold me, you could have just said.”
I released him, my face feeling hot. “No, you just scared me to death acting like you’d jump, that’s all.”
“I wasn’t acting. I would’ve done it. This is nothing. You should’ve seen the cli
ffs—”
“But its freezing! You’d get pneumonia!” I protested, cringing that my hands had landed on my hips.
“Naw, I’d be fine, but I’m glad you’re worried about my safety.” He winked, still dishing out that cocky grin of his.
“I’m not worried,” I countered, feeling unhinged. Probably because he’s toying with my worst nightmare. Logically, I knew he didn’t know, but it still irritated me. “I don’t care if you do jump, just not while I’m around, okay?”
To my surprise, his grin vanished, his eyes turning contrite. “Are you afraid of heights, Sam?”
“I’m not a fan of them, no.” I could feel his eyes still on me, but I didn’t know if I wanted to divulge more. Oh, might as well. He already thinks I’m nuts. “It’s not just that though. I’m afraid of water.”
I braced myself for his snarky comment. I mean, what seventeen-year-old admits to being afraid of water?
His tone was soft. “Don’t you know how to swim?”
I kept my gaze locked on the rippling water below. “Yes, my parents forced me to take lessons. I almost drowned when I was nine. I just don’t like to be under the water long. It freaks me out.”
When it remained quiet, I peered over at him, meeting his gaze.
“Well, that’d scare anyone. What happened?”
“It was the one time I went to California.” I laughed mirthlessly. “We were at a beach in San Diego. My sister, Jocelyn, was with me when a wave hit us. I just remember tumbling under it, sucking in water and sand, and then being pulled further out. I’d come up, hear my parents screaming, and then be thrown under again.”
I tried to suppress a shudder, but it rippled through me anyway. “I couldn’t see anything in the blackness, and my eyes kept burning. I just remember swallowing what felt like gallons of salt water.”
I inhaled reflexively, trying to relieve the pressure settling on my chest. I didn’t want to meet Blake’s eyes. I knew he’d see terror written all over my face. For whatever reason, my near drowning had marked the beginning of therapy, confusion, and periodic blackouts. It gave way to me being known as the poor crazy Campbell girl, the one who wasn’t a model or volleyball player, the one who never quite fit in.
His hand touched my arm, his fingers sliding down until he secured my hand in his. “That sounds horrible. How did you survive?”
With his warm hand wrapped around mine, the crushing heaviness on my chest began to dissipate. I felt like I could breathe again. I can do this. I faced him.
“That’s the weird part. I thought I’d died. Everything stopped. I was in this strange, black void… I couldn’t feel pain or fear… just peace. And then next thing I know, I’m coughing out salt water on the beach. I just remember seeing my dad sobbing over me. My family said it looked like I’d swam to the surface somehow, and then my dad had grabbed me and swam me to shore. So I don’t know. One minute I’m dead, the next I’m okay.”
“You don’t remember swimming up though,” he asked, his brow furrowed.
“No, but I could’ve sworn…”
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“Come on, Sam, tell me. You can trust me.” His tone was eager. His warmth radiated up my arm, tempting me to move closer.
“K, don’t laugh though. It felt like someone was with me. I didn’t feel alone.”
He grinned. “Maybe it was your guardian angel.” I slugged his shoulder, and his eyes flew open wide. “What did you do that for?”
“You’re making fun of me.” At least, I thought he was. I didn’t know how to take this suddenly serious Blake.
He pulled me close to him, his free hand sweeping the hair from my face. His fingers lingered near my jaw, sending goose bumps shooting across my skin. “No, Sam. I’m not.”
His gaze darted between my eyes and then down at my lips. The uncertainty in them left me reeling. Is he going to kiss me? My heart squeezed, and my breath caught in my throat. I felt my body gravitate toward him. Oh gosh, I’m the one leaning in… I couldn’t stop the pull I felt toward him. My neck turned up, my lips parting. His breath tickled my face.
“Sammy, baby!” a voice boomed out in the distance.
Blake’s head snapped back and I rocked unevenly forward, realizing how close we had been to kissing. Embarrassed yet disappointed, I searched the bridge, spying the source of the call, although I already knew who it was. Mack.
“Impeccable timing, Mack,” Blake muttered. I peeked over at him. Wonder if he wants to kill Mack right now too.
Mack jogged over. I could’ve sworn his grin faltered a second when he saw Blake’s hand on mine, but then he laughed loudly. “Wow. Fancy meeting you two here, of all places.”
“Yeah, fancy that,” Blake said dryly, but I didn’t miss the smile spreading on Blake’s face and I relaxed. It was such a relief; Jeremy would be spitting bullets right now if Mack had appeared.
“Hey Mack, what’s up?” I asked, wondering what he was doing wandering up here by himself anyway.
“Oh you know, off saving the world, same old same old. How about you two?”
I grinned at him. “We were just debating if we should jump.” Or kiss.
“Brrr,” Mack replied, shaking his shoulders. “No thanks, there are parts of me that don’t like turning blue.”
Blake chuckled, and I rolled my eyes at both of them.
Mack turned to Blake, his lips twitching. “An old friend’s back.”
Blake visibly started, but then his face went blank. “Oh really?”
Mack nodded. “Saw him today.”
I looked to Mack and then Blake for answers.
“Who are you talking about?” I asked. I didn’t miss the boys’ swift glance to each other. Suddenly irritated that my childhood friend, Mack, kept secrets with Blake, I turned on him.
“Come on, you have to tell me, now that you brought it up,” I complained, fearing I sounded like a whiny baby.
Mack squinted. “Kory. You probably don’t remember him.”
I racked my brain. Kory? Oh yeah… “The guy Jen had a crush on?” I asked.
Mack flinched, and I felt bad because I knew he liked her. “Yeah, that guy.”
What’s Kory have to do with this? I racked my brain to remember what I knew of him. We went to the same elementary school until they discovered he had cancer. Our school had done a huge fundraiser to help pay for some new cancer treatment he was going to get, and then his family moved away. Years later, he’d showed up in middle school. I probably wouldn’t have even realized who he was except for the fact that Jen was obsessed with him from eighth grade on.
“Didn’t he move away when we were sophomores?” I asked.
“Yeah,” Blake answered, instead of Mack. How would he know? He didn’t live here.
I turned to ask when I noticed Blake’s jaw clench as his eyes narrowed. He stared out over the bridge.
Swallowing back my question, I glanced at Mack. “So what? He’s moved back again?”
Mack cocked his head to the side. “Yep. Maybe it’s time to get reacquainted. Huh, Blake?”
“Yes.” The word came out flat, lifeless. Blake glanced at me, his face softening. “Sam, I’m sorry, but I think we better head back. I have… a few things to do before I leave.”
The drive back was quiet; I slumped in my seat, the pain of disappointment smarting. I had hoped this outing would have a very different outcome. But since Mack’s announcement, Blake had turned quiet, almost moody. He seemed a thousand miles away, not right next to me.
I cleared my throat. “So, are you going to tell me what you’re thinking about?”
His eyes widened, as if remembering I was there. “Oh, sorry, zoned out there.”
I hiked my shoulders up. “So… how do you know Kory and why do I get the feeling you don’t like him much?”
He sighed heavily. “Kory used to live in California. Let’s just say the last time we saw each other, it didn’t end well.”
> I wanted more, but I had a hunch Blake wouldn’t expand. Instead, he said, “Sam, can you promise me something while I’m gone?”
I folded my arms across my chest, tempted to say ‘no’ to whatever he was about to ask. Why’s he keeping secrets from me? Then realization seeped in; wasn’t I doing the same thing by not telling him about my wings?
“Okay, sure,” I muttered.
“I know you love to go biking and running but while I’m gone, can you be extra cautious? In fact, I don’t think you and Anna should go on that ride anymore.”
“Wait, what? Why not? I promised her we’d go. What’s going on, Blake?”
“Nothing, nothing’s going on.”
“Yeah, right…” I glanced at him, and my words faded. He reminded me of a first time snow driver; shoulders stiff, hands white knuckling the steering wheel, and eyes flickering to the rearview mirror repeatedly. Apprehension replaced my frustration. Are we being followed?
I stared at him. “What’s wrong, Blake?”
His eyes met mine briefly, and then flashed back to the road. “Nothing, just promise me, okay?”
I had a horrible, sinking sensation in my gut. “Okay, fine. I promise I’ll be careful, but I’m not backing out on Anna.”
He glanced my way and then sighed. “Always the stubborn one… I see why you two get along so well.” He grinned. “I’d never hear the end of it from Anna if you don’t go, so on second thought, keep that date.”
“Haha.”
“But stay away from Jeremy,” he added. His light tone let me know it wasn’t my safety he was worried about—he just couldn’t stand the guy.
“No worries there. Let’s just say Jeremy and I have an understanding too.”
“Oh really?” Blake’s eyes danced back at me. “Best news I’ve heard all day. Spill it, and don’t spare the details, especially the parts where you told him what a moron he is.”
Relieved to see Blake’s playful side, I told him everything, poor Jeremy becoming the brunt of all our jokes.
After Blake had dropped me off and I climbed the steps to my bedroom, the weight of the afternoon hung on me like a noose. It started with the nagging suspicion that someone had been watching me outside Blake’s house, and that maybe he wasn’t that far off telling me to be careful.