Page 22 of Ruin


  Zeus’s car is mere feet away.

  The pap is still following us though. I think the guy must have a death wish.

  “Hey, Cameron, can you confirm whether the rumors that you also used to sleep with men for money are true?”

  It happens so fast that I’m helpless to stop it.

  The bag of food is thrown to the ground, and Zeus has the pap by the throat. His big hand around the guy’s neck, he shoves the pap backward, practically lifting him off his feet, hitting his back into Zeus’s car. His camera drops to the floor with a loud crack.

  “Zeus!” I cry, my hands reaching for his arms, trying to pull him off the guy, who’s gasping for air, his face reddening by the second.

  But Zeus isn’t letting go. It’s like he doesn’t even know I’m here right now.

  “Say that again, motherfucker. To my face,” Zeus grinds the words out through his clenched jaw.

  “I-I didn’t say anything,” the pap chokes out.

  Zeus leans his face into the guy’s. “Liar. Say it.”

  “Zeus, let him go,” I plead. “It doesn’t matter what he said.” I tug on the arm that has the guy by the throat. “Please. Think of Gigi.”

  The instant I say her name, I feel his muscles slacken in his arm, and I know I’ve reached him.

  “Please, Zeus,” I beg again.

  His eyes turn to mine. The look in them…I’ve seen that look on him only one time outside of the ring, and it was when that guy was hitting on me in that club, the night Zeus got the scar on his eyebrow.

  “You’re choking him,” I say with urgency as the guy gasps for air. “Just let him go, and we can go home together. Just me and you.”

  I can see the war he’s having in his mind. A few seconds later, his hand comes from around the guy’s throat, and he drops to the floor on his hands and knees, sucking in gulps of air.

  Zeus stares down at him. His voice is low and terrifying when he says, “You ever come near Cam again, even breathe in her direction, or imply some shit that you know ain’t true, and I’ll come after you. And there won’t be a fucking soul on earth who’ll be able to stop me. Do you hear me?”

  The pap gasps out, “I hear ya.”

  Zeus yanks open the passenger door. “Get in,” he barks at me.

  I practically jump to attention and get in the car.

  Zeus is in the driver’s side moments later, and then we’re peeling out of there.

  The anger rolling off him is palpable. It’s stifling in the confined space of his car. I feel like I’m the one choking now.

  I know I should say something, but I don’t know what to say.

  We drive back to his apartment in that thick cloud of silence.

  Zeus is still living at the apartment until his lease is up in just over a month, and then he’ll move into the house. In the meantime, he’s going to start work on the house, getting it ready—a new kitchen fitted, decorating the place up, buying furniture, basically making it a home.

  Zeus said he wants my input on the decor, as it’s my home, too, and I’ll be living there soon enough, so I should like how it looks. I didn’t argue with the “soon enough” comment because I know Zeus and how he gets when he sets something in his mind. Truthfully, the more I think about living with him, about us finally being a family, the more I feel comfortable with the idea—maybe even a little excited.

  Though, right now, excitement is the last thing I’m feeling. Worry, trepidation…yep, definitely feeling those.

  He parks the car outside his building. Turns off the engine. But makes no move to get out of the car.

  He’s sitting there. Hands curled around the steering wheel, eyes staring straight ahead.

  I unclip my seat belt and shift in my seat to face him. “Zeus,” I softly say his name.

  “I wanted to hurt him.” Dark eyes turn to mine. “I really wanted to fucking hurt him.”

  “I know,” I say quietly. “And you did hurt him. You hurt his pride. I’m pretty sure you broke his camera. And you definitely scared the shit out of him.”

  I smile, but he doesn’t react. The smile fades from my face.

  “After what happened with Scott”—he blows out a breath—“things started to look different. The hunger to fight…it didn’t seem so important anymore. But then…in that moment, that asshole was Marcel along with every fucking journalist out there who’s said something bad about you. He was every regret and mistake I’ve made with you. He was five years without you. He was missing out on Gigi’s start in life.”

  My eyes fill with tears, and I reach for his hand.

  “I wanted to hurt him, Cam…but I wanted to hurt myself more.”

  “Zeus…”

  “You’re better off without me,” he says. “I should never have come back.”

  A tear spills down my cheek. “Is this you giving up on us again?”

  “No.” Remorseful eyes move to mine. “But you should give up on me. I’m no good for you, Dove. I’m no good for anyone.”

  I climb over the console, straddling his lap, and take his face in my hands. “Bullshit. You listen to me, Zeus Kincaid. I have loved you for nine years. Five of them, I spent without you, and not once did my feelings for you diminish or stop. You are good for me. We’re only good together. This is just another bump in the road for us. We’ve gotten over bigger. And we’ll get over this one.”

  His eyes, which are fixed on mine, slowly blink once. “I love you,” he rasps out. “So fucking much, it hurts.”

  I kiss his scarred brow, then his cheek, and finally his mouth. “It hurts to love you, too, Zeus. But it also heals me. Loving you is everything.”

  “Fuck,” he groans. His fingers plunge into my hair, and his mouth takes mine in a deep kiss. “I just wish you could see my feelings for you, Dove. See how fucking deep they run.”

  “So, take me inside your apartment, and show me,” I whisper into his mouth.

  And he does exactly that.

  Zeus takes me into his apartment, and he spends the rest of the night showing me with his body just how deep his feelings for me really do go.

  Gigi, Zeus, and I are having a lazy Saturday afternoon at his apartment.

  I took Gigi shopping this morning. It’d been a while since we had our girlie time together. And then we grabbed three takeout burritos for lunch and brought them with us to eat at Zeus’s place.

  We’re all fed up with burritos, and now, we’re sitting on the sofa together, watching Tangled for what is quite possibly the thousandth time.

  Gigi is sprawled all over Zeus like a blanket. He looks so content, sitting there with her. They both do.

  It makes my heart swell. I could sit and watch them all day long like this.

  Zeus catches me staring. I don’t look away. It’s so much easier that I don’t have to hide my feelings from him or myself anymore.

  The corner of his lips lifts into that stunning smile. I smile, too.

  He parts his lips, wetting them with his tongue.

  My sex clenches.

  Down, girl. We’re rated PG at the moment.

  His eyes flicker down to Gigi, whose eyes are glued to the TV screen. Then, he looks back to me.

  I love you, he mouths.

  My smile widens so big, I’m sure my face is about to crack.

  I’m just about to mouth the same words back when there’s a knock at his door.

  Both our eyes turn in that direction.

  “You expecting anyone?” I ask him.

  He shakes his head. He goes to move, but I tell him to stay put.

  “I’ll get it,” I say, so he doesn’t have to disturb Gigi.

  I push up to my feet and pad barefoot to his door.

  I check the peephole, and when I see who it is, a bad feeling drops into my stomach.

  I unlock the door and pull it open. “Rich, Emilio,” I greet them.

  Emilio is also an officer at the station, and they’re both in uniform, which means they’re on the job. My bad feel
ing sinks lower.

  “Everything okay?”

  “Is Zeus here?” Rich asks me.

  “Um…yeah. He’s just in the living room with Gigi.” I protectively hold the door close to me. “Why?”

  “We just need a word with him, Cam,” Emilio says.

  I hear footsteps behind me. Then, Zeus’s hands are pressing gently down on my shoulders but in a possessive manner.

  I don’t miss Rich’s eyes going to them.

  “What can I do for you, boys?” Zeus says.

  At the term boys, Rich straightens up to his full height, which is still nowhere near as big as Zeus.

  Testosterone. The cause of most of the world’s problems.

  “There’s been a complaint of assault and malicious destruction of property made against you, and we need you to come to the station with us,” Rich tells him.

  “What?” I gasp.

  The paparazzi guy.

  “And you’re here to take me in?” Zeus says calmly.

  “No,” I say, panicked. I turn my eyes to him.

  He must see the fear in them because he says, “It’s okay, Cam.”

  “No, it’s not!” My voice rises in panic, and I internally chastise myself. I don’t want Gigi to come here and see what’s going on.

  I step forward a little, toward Rich and Emilio, but Zeus doesn’t relinquish his hold on me.

  “Isn’t there something you can do?” I plead to Rich.

  Rich gives me a sad look. He shakes his head. “It’s out of my hands.” He reaches for the handcuffs from his belt.

  Tears spring to my eyes.

  Zeus moves around me, shielding me. And I instantly see Rich and Emilio stiffen.

  Zeus holds his hands up in surrender. “Gigi’s here,” he says directly to Rich, a surprising quietness to his voice. “I’ll come quietly. I’m not gonna make a scene. I just don’t want my daughter to see me in those.” He nods at the cuffs in Rich’s hand.

  Rich glances at Emilio, who nods.

  Rich clips the cuffs back on his belt. “Okay,” he says. “But we have to go now.”

  Zeus turns to me and takes my face in his hands. “I love you, and I’ll be home soon,” he tells me. “Tell Gigi…just tell her I’ll be back real soon.”

  The ache in his eyes brings the tears back to my eyes. He firmly kisses me on the lips before I can start bawling.

  I hold on to him tight, not wanting to let him go. Breathing him in, like I’m never going to see him again.

  I’m going to see him again.

  “I love you,” I whisper against his lips.

  He pulls away from me, leaving me cold, and walks out the door, past Rich and Emilio, who immediately follow him, but I catch sight of the hurt in Rich’s eyes before he turns to leave.

  Rich and I were never together properly, but he did have feelings for me, and I did for him to a certain degree even if he did let Zeus run him off so easily. But it’s hard to care about his feelings right now when he’s putting Zeus in the back of his patrol car and shutting the door.

  My heart is beating like a drum against my chest.

  He’s coming back, Cam. It’s going to be okay.

  “Mommy, why is Daddy going in a powice car with Wich?”

  The sound of Gigi’s voice beside me has me shutting my fears away and clearing my expression. I reach down and pick her up. She wraps her legs around my waist, her arms around my neck.

  “Daddy’s just helping Rich with something.”

  “Daddy a powiceman now?” Her eyes light up.

  “No.” I kiss her hair. “He’s just helping Rich with some questions; that’s all. Nothing to worry about.”

  I watch the car pull away, catching sight of Zeus in the backseat of the police car. His eyes on me and Gigi.

  And my heart starts to hurt.

  Closing the front door, I turn my face to Gigi, painting on a bright smile. “How about we bake some cookies for Daddy to have when he gets home?”

  “Chocowate chip?” She smiles hopefully.

  “How does double chocolate chip sound?”

  “Yay!” She excitedly claps her hands.

  “I just need to call Granny Elle real quick. Why don’t you go watch Tangled for a few more minutes, and then we can go to the store to buy the ingredients, as I’m sure Daddy doesn’t have any?” I smile at her.

  “Okay, Mommy,” she says cheerfully. Blissfully unaware that her father is currently on his way to the police station for assaulting a paparazzi. And the arresting officer is a guy I used to sleep with.

  God, what a clusterfuck of a mess.

  The only consistent and sure thing in my life is this little girl in my arms. And the fact that, no matter what, I love Zeus, and I always will.

  I put Gigi to her feet, and she runs off to the living room. I wait until I hear the sounds of Tangled resume before I slide my cell from my jeans pocket and speed-dial Aunt Elle’s cell.

  She answers on the second ring. “I literally just heard about the complaint filed against Zeus,” she tells me before I get a chance to say anything. “I’ll deal with it, Cam. Don’t worry about anything.”

  “Thank you,” I breathe, blinking back tears from my eyes.

  “Mommy! Can we go to the store yet? I wanna make cwookies!” Gigi calls from the living room.

  “One more minute,” I call to Gigi. “Sorry,” I say to Aunt Elle. “I told Gigi we’d make Zeus some cookies for when he got home. I have to take her to the store—” A sob catches in my throat. I press my hand to my mouth.

  “It is going to be okay, Cam. Say it.”

  I take a deep breath, blinking back tears. “It’s going to be okay.”

  “Good girl. Now, you and Gigi get to baking those cookies, and I’ll have Zeus back home before they’ve cooled.”

  “Thank you,” I say again.

  “You never need to thank me. There isn’t a thing in this world that I wouldn’t do for you or our Gigi girl.”

  Emotion clogs my throat. “I love you, Mom,” I say, surprising myself.

  That’s the first time I’ve ever called her it. I don’t know why I just did now. Or why I haven’t always called her it.

  There’s a pause.

  I don’t know what she’s thinking, and that scares me. A lump fixes in my throat, and my damp hand clamps tight around my phone.

  “Should I not have said that?” I whisper.

  She makes a choked sound. And, when she speaks, her voice is thick, “You’re my daughter, Cam. You always have been. You always will be. Hearing you call me Mom…” Another pained sound comes from her.

  I’ve never seen her cry before. She’s the strongest woman I’ve ever known. But I’m pretty sure she is or is close to tears right now.

  A tear rolls down my cheek. I brush it away. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

  She lets out what seems to be a happy sound. “You haven’t upset me. Far from it. You’ve…I’m just happy right now. I’d rank this as the second happiest day of my life.”

  “What was your first?”

  “The day you came to live with me and the day Gigi was born.”

  “That’s two things,” I say.

  “Joint first,” she tells me. “I’m not going to choose between my girls.”

  I laugh softly as another tear slips down my cheek. I brush it away.

  “Now, let’s stop before you have me bawling, and I wreck my reputation as the station’s hard-ass. Let me get Zeus out of this trouble he’s gotten himself into.”

  “Okay,” I whisper.

  We hang up, and I push my cell back into my jeans pocket. I dry my face with my hands, blow out a strengthening breath, step back into Mommy mode, and walk through into the living room to find my girl sprawled out on the sofa, singing along to Tangled.

  “Okay, Gigi girl.” I clap my hands together, getting her attention. “Let’s go to the store, and then we can get our bake on.”

  True to her word, Aunt Elle got Zeus home. It took a bi
t longer than the time it took Gigi and I to go to the store and back and bake the cookies, but she got him home nonetheless.

  Aunt Elle had Zeus released on a DAT—desk ticket appearance. Meaning he wouldn’t have to stay in jail until his arraignment. He’s supposed to go in front of a judge in a few days, so he can be formally charged with assault and malicious destruction of property.

  I know. I want to cry every time I think about it.

  But Zeus is confident that it’ll never get that far. And Aunt Elle agrees with him.

  The paparazzi guy will want money. That’s all he’ll want, according to Zeus. That’s why he pressed charges in the first place.

  Zeus’s lawyers are currently prepping to make a deal with this guy. If he accepts, which Zeus says he will, the charges will be dropped, and Zeus will pay him damages.

  Sickens me to think that this guy can harass us while we’re out together, take our pictures, and say some awful, derogatory, and untruthful things about me, and Zeus is the one who has to pay. Literally.

  But, “It’s the way of the world,” Zeus said.

  I’m just starting to think the world sucks an awful lot more than I realized. Well, at least the world Zeus is a part of.

  I’m at work, at my desk, when my cell rings. The name of the man of the moment lights up my screen, like he knew I was just thinking about him.

  “Hey,” I answer. “I was just thinking about you,” I echo my thoughts.

  “Were you thinking about the amazing things I could do to you with my tongue?”

  “I wasn’t, but I am now.” I squirm in my seat.

  “So, how about you come to my apartment on your lunch break, and I can do those things to you in celebration of the asshole dropping the charges?”

  “Really?”

  “Really,” he says. “I just got the call from my lawyer. I have to pay the asshole fifty thousand dollars, but—”

  “Fifty thousand dollars!” I shriek, quickly glancing around to make sure nobody heard me.

  “It’s fine.”

  “No, it’s not. You shouldn’t have to pay fifty thousand dollars to that asshole.”

  “Dove, I’d pay it twice if it meant I got to shut him up again. It’s not a big deal. It’s only money. Just let it go. I have. And come here and celebrate the charges going away with me in bed.”