“It’s not like that,” Sammy said.
“I know what this is.” Becky squinted.
“What is?” I asked.
She smiled. “This is good.”
“What is good?”
“You are entering phase two. The anger phase.”
“Believe me, it’s a phase I’ll never get through.”
I tried to wipe the smirk off her face but she still had it.
“Whatever.”
THE NEXT DAY I was called in again but this time to Constance’s office in the infirmary, and alone.
I knocked twice on her door and she looked up, giving me the widest smile. “Come in, Elena.”
I walked toward one of the chairs in front of her desk and plunged into it. “How could you, Constance?”
“I didn’t, Elena. He saw it himself.”
“How?” I yelled as I would have remembered.
“When he found you in the tower and took you back to your room,” she said without opening her eyes.
That dream wasn’t a dream. It really had been him and my friends had lied to me and said it was George.
I took a deep breath. “How many know?”
“Him, me and your friends who got themselves ones too.”
“Yeah, I know it was stupid.”
“It’s their way of telling you that a barcode is not going to define who you are, Elena.”
I took a deep breath, pushing back the tears. Why couldn’t I see that?
“It’s why I asked you to come.” She didn’t smile. In fact she looked distraught. “I know you don’t want to go on this journey as we have no idea how long this will take.”
I nodded, not looking pleased at all. It was as if they were forcing him on me to make peace.
“I don’t want to use this card, Elena, but I have family stuck inside of Etan.”
I swallowed hard. I’d forgotten about Constance’s husband and daughter. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think.”
“Don’t be. I know how hard it is for you that is why I took the chance to help you a bit more. I hope you don’t mind.”
I shook my head as I was ready to ask for more help when I heard that conversation, but I was scared that Blake was somewhere here wanting to talk to me with her next to me.
“I got a Night Seeker to help you.”
“A what?”
She giggled. “There are only a few left in Paegeia and it doesn’t surprise me that the Council didn’t teach you about them yet. They are seen as a dangerous species, but I promise you, Leonard is far from dangerous. They are exceptionally good when it comes to things that are bothering us.”
“Like a psychiatrist?” I asked.
“They keep to themselves, Elena. They are blind, hence the name, Night Seekers. And they have a gift that a normal psychiatrist doesn’t have.”
“What sort of gift?”
“They really make things so much easier when speaking to one about their problems and time feels shorter. They sure give a new meaning to the name head doctors.”
I couldn’t help but giggle.
“I know it was bold of me to do this, without asking you, but he is willing to help as a favor to me. He helped me with the separation from my family and I know he can help you too. He doesn’t take things away, so it will never feel like it has never been done to you, Elena. He somehow gives you strength to make it bearable and get over it. Make it easier to move on faster.”
I nodded.
“He’s easy to talk to as well. You will see if you just give him a chance.”
I really wanted the dreams to stop and I did want to get over all of this and move on.
“Okay, I’ll see him.”
“That’s my girl.”
“So when is my first appointment with him?”
“In a couple of days, I’ll let you know when he arrives. He is going to stay at the academy for the next two weeks. The board has already granted it, if you agreed to see him. I just need to send word to him and he will come.”
“Okay, I’m going to see a head doctor. About time too, don’t you think?”
“You were always a strong young lady. It’s just I feel this time you need that extra help, Elena. Make things more bearable.”
“Okay.” I looked at her. “Is there anything else?”
“Nope, just that. You can go back to class.”
“Thanks.” I got up and left her infirmary.
A Night Seeker? What the hell was still roaming in Paegeia that I didn’t know about?
Y FIRST APPOINTMENT with Leonard the Night Seeker was this afternoon. I didn’t tell anyone about it and to be honest I wasn’t sure that I was ready to speak about the events that had happened.
I didn’t know what to expect with this Night Seeker either.
When the final bell rang I put the last map of Elm away. I only had Areeth to search through and if I found something, well, I was going to need my friends to help me, and probably Emanual too.
He would freak if I told him that I wanted to go back to a Wyvern city but he had given his oath that he would keep me safe. And I felt safe whenever he was around.
I knocked on Constance’s door and walked in as she acknowledged me.
“Good afternoon, Elena. Are you ready to meet Leonard?”
I nodded and took a deep breath.
“Don’t be scared, I know the pale skin and long teeth make people fear them.”
“Long teeth?”
She giggled. “Look past the appearance Elena, he is going to do wonders for you. I just know it.”
“Okay.” I didn’t sound so sure anymore.
She led me to another room and knocked on the door first. A deep beautiful voice said “Enter” and she opened the door.
I found a man sitting on a chair with a cane against the wall. Another chair was right opposite him. He took a deep sniff which honestly gave me the creeps. “Constance.” He smiled. “I assume Elena is with you. Did you mention the carnivore appearance or do I need to run and hide first?”
She giggled. “No, Leonard. She knows. Leonard, this is Elena, Elena, Leonard.”
He turned his head and I found a pale face, as white as snow, with shades and the reddest lips anyone could ever have.
He smiled without showing his teeth in my direction and held out his hand for mine. I looked at Constance who winked and I touched his pale hand. He entwined his fingers with mine. “Don’t worry. I don’t want to date you, this is our custom greeting,” he joked and I giggled.
I could see pointy teeth sticking out from under his lips as he spoke and was sure his appearance was something I could get used to, but he was hardly dangerous. In fact I think he was trying everything to not make me scared of him.
“Nice to meet you, Elena.”
“Likewise,” I said and he gestured toward the chair.
I sat down and he took the chair opposite me again.
Constance exited without saying goodbye.
“I know it’s not always easy to speak to someone about the nightmares that haunt us in life, but I promise you that you will feel stronger after each and every time you see me. It’s still a process, Elena. Night Seekers have the ability to see through touch, to understand without speaking a word.”
I gulped down hard as he said it; it’s why his hand was entwined with mine. “Wait?” I asked. “You already know what happened to me?”
“This is our customary touch. We see faces through that, you can call them our eyes.” He twirled his hand. “But we see more than that. I do know already all the things that are bothering you, and will help you through them, speed up the process, where others have to deal with their fears for years and years.”
“I don’t quite understand how you can speed it up. Aren’t there stages for working through these sorts of things?”
“There are, but doing it through me, well, best you see what I mean. I will never reveal to anyone what is said in here or what I saw a couple of minutes ago. What is said to a Nig
ht Seeker stays with a Night Seeker. Just look to us as the keepers of people’s problems. We deal with them in the long run.”
“That doesn’t seem fair at all. Won’t it affect you?”
He smiled again. “Hardly, as it has happened to you and not to me, but I will experience it through you, so it’s like we are sharing the pain.”
I nodded, even though I knew he couldn’t see it.
“You’re nodding.”
I giggled. “Sorry about that.”
He chuckled. “Not to worry. So what is troubling you that’s causing Constance to worry about you so much?”
“I thought you knew that already.”
“I do, but you need to talk about them.”
“Something happened to me a couple of months back, well almost two months ago.”
“Was it something bad? Of course it’s something bad. Forgive me.”
I smiled softly. “Yes, I was stuck in a Wyvern city and I couldn’t get out. I now know what it feels like to be sold off and become someone’s property, but he took great care of me. It was his son and a couple of others that didn’t share his good nature.”
“Speak, tell me everything from the beginning. Let’s start with the day you got stuck in this place.” He took my hand softly in his. “Try to remember everything you can.”
I nodded. And started off telling him about Blake and how I’d released him, how I told him the words that would finally set him free. And that he had then kissed me.
“Let’s stop there. Did you want him to kiss you?”
“I don’t know. I guess a year ago, yes, but then, not so much. He was mean, always mean. I tried to make him stop, push him away, but he didn’t let me.”
“So he forced this kiss on you?”
“At first, yes, but then I—” I didn’t want to admit it. “I guess a part of me wanted it and a part didn’t want it. I don’t know how to explain it.”
“No you are doing great. I’m getting the picture loud and clear. And what happened then?”
“He grunted, let go of me and at first I thought it was him being cruel again but then he told me that it wasn’t like that.” Tears welled up in my eyes. “Blood started to pour out of his nose, ears, eyes, and then he just fell over.”
“I see, that memory is a very strong one. Haunting you for a long time, no?”
I nodded again. “Yes.” I remembered that he couldn’t see me. “I thought I’d killed him and that was when my body just took over. My mind was thinking of all the events but my body was acting all by itself.”
He nodded.
“I don’t know how I got into the Wyvern city at all.”
“I see. Not to worry. Not a lot of humans are wired like you. It’s a defense mechanism that I’ve seen only a couple of times. Where one’s actual body goes into auto pilot guiding them wherever they have to go, in your case, away from what you thought you did, while the mind is trying to cope with the events. It’s rare but natural, Elena.”
“It doesn’t feel natural.”
“Well it’s perfectly normal, just rare, like I said. Let’s stay on this topic for a while. What did you feel when you thought you killed Blake? I assume he is your dragon.”
He didn’t know who Blake was, or me? That was weird. “I felt like a murderer, like I was poison. Everyone dies around me. First my father, then another dragon, and then my boyfriend, all saving me. So when Blake died, I thought that I was poison.”
“I can relate to that.” He sighed. “You were not raised in this world, were you?”
I shook my head. It was weird how my hand was still in his as he asked me the questions, but I guessed he was seeing it, as I was busy telling him. “She should’ve called me sooner. You have so many things to deal with.”
“Tell me about it.”
“Let’s deal with recent events and when you came back from your mission. I believe you are going on one, that is what Constance told me.” Leo asked. “Then we can tackle the loss of this boyfriend of yours and all the others that you have lost.”
“Okay,” I simply said. It sounded like a great plan now that I was actually here with him.
“Today we are going to make you feel not so poisonous anymore. Your touch isn’t what kills people. It’s the evil in this world that does. It couldn’t possibly come from someone as lovely as yourself, so you need to stop blaming yourself.”
“But if they didn’t trust me…”
“Shhh, you are not poisonous,” he said again. “Repeat it after me. I’m not poisonous.”
It sounded stupid, but I did. I said it.
“Again.”
“I’m not poisonous.”
Something happened. It was a jolt that rippled through my mind and for a few short seconds I saw it through his eyes. It wasn’t me. It was Fox that had killed my father, and the dragon that had killed Brian. It was Paul that had killed Lucian, and Tanya that had sacrificed her daughter for my life and a procedure that was delayed by two years with Blake. None of it had been me. Then it was as if my own insecurities of blaming myself for all their deaths jolted back into me.
I breathed hard again.
“What was that?”
“It’s seeing things how they are, even for a few short seconds. You are not to blame for any of those deaths, Elena.”
A buzzer went off. “That’s all the time we have. I must rest as these sessions do take quite a lot out of me and I have another sad case a bit later tonight.”
I giggled the way he said it.
“I hope you are going to sleep better tonight and remember, you are not poisonous. It’s okay to hug and touch people.”
“Thank you,” I said with tears in my eyes. I didn’t know why I had them but Constance was right. It was as if the huge weight that had come with everyone’s deaths was lifted off my shoulder.
“I’ll see you tomorrow again, Elena.”
“I’ll be here,” I said and opened the door.
I found Constance in her office.
“And?”
“He’s actually upset with you for only calling him now.”
She closed her eyes and sighed.
I giggled. “It’s going to work,” I said as I wiped away the tears.
She got up and wrapped her arms around my shoulder. “I’m glad to hear that. You feel any better yet?”
“We sorted out one huge thing. I’m not poisonous.”
“You never were, Elena.”
“I know that now. Thanks for getting him here.”
“It’s the least I could do. I was scared that you wouldn’t want to see him.”
“That thing he does.”
She giggled.
“He’s just showing you how to look at things. Human psychiatrists only get that through their clients after years and years of therapy. You got it in an hour.”
“He’s amazing.”
“I’m glad you see that.” She hugged me again.
“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow.”
I really wanted to know about his appointment tonight but remembered what he’d said, what was said to a Night Seeker, stayed with a Night Seeker.
Still I stopped and turned around. “Did he really see everything that happened to me with that one touch?”
She smiled. “Not all of it, he just got a sort of summary, Elena, think of it as a show that is on fast forward. It’s what he gets from the first touch and through the sessions when you speak about it in details, the fast forward button stops and it plays normal.”
“I didn’t even think people could do that.”
“Well, he is a Night Seeker, Elena, there is a difference. As they do live off blood.”
“He’s a vampire?”
She giggled. “Is that what your side calls them?”
“They are not real.”
“Like Dragons.”
“Okay, scratch that.”
She laughed and I said goodbye. Vampires too, oh my!
> I KNOCKED ON the infirmary door around seven and Constance smiled as she’d just walked out of her office.
“Enter, Blake.”
I took that first step. “Leo here?”
“He’s waiting for you. She had her first session too, it’s going to work Blake.”
“I hope so.”
“It will, and he will do wonders for you too.”
I smiled and followed her to the room where the Night Seeker was waiting. I was never fond of them. Queen Catherine was forced to see one too but she refused, which meant that the woman always ended up playing with me whenever I was around.
They weren’t the prettiest of creatures out there, but if Constance said that they were good, then I had to give this a shot.
She knocked on the door and a deep voice said “Enter”.
I found the pale man sitting on a chair and there was another one opposite him.
“Leo, this is Blake.”
“Good evening Blake.” He reached out his hand and his fingers entwined with mine, their custom greeting. I didn’t like it much and was glad when he eventually let go of my hand.
“You were born and raised this side so I don’t have to explain what type of a creature I am.”
“Nope, I know exactly what it is you can do.”
“What can I help you with today?”
“I just want Elena to be okay, that’s all.”
“Elena, is she your girlfriend?”
“C’mon. I know you saw her this afternoon.”
He smiled and it showed all his fangs. “I thought you knew Night Seekers.”
“Yes, but pretending that you don’t know her makes me worry that you don’t really care.”
He chuckled. “You sure are a ray of sunshine.”
I chuckled too. “Hardly,” I said. “So will she be okay?”
“Dents.” He sighed. “You only care about your riders and don’t care about anything else in this world. Do you?”
“Please just answer me.”
“It’s up to her, Blake and that is all I can say.”
“She hates my guts, you know.”
“You want to share that with me. Make me understand.”
I stared at him. He was seriously not doing this. “Sure, why not, but I promise you that nothing you are going to show me, will make me feel better about myself. I deserve it.”