Miniature Fiction: Another 50 Very Short Stories
By: Patrick Lane
Copyright © 2014 by Patrick Lane
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Introduction
Miniature Fiction is a website I started for very short stories. Its currently hosted on tumblr and can be found by going to MiniatureFiction.com
I started this as a website where some friends and I could share some short stories. Most of them are mine, but there is a growing number of people who find the site and submit their own. Please submit your own if you feel so inclined. I give links to authors tumblr pages, websites, twitter feeds, ebooks… whatever they want.
If you submit a story, it is yours to do with as you please. It will never be sold or claimed as mine. If a story of yours is published you are consenting to having it shared as that is partly what the site is all about. However, I do ask that anyone who shares the stories give their writer proper attribution. Please don’t claim ownership of other peoples works. Authors who become regular contributors may be given their own section on the site that points to all the various places they can be found on the web.
Currently, all the stories being published on Miniature Fiction are limited to three sentences. This may seem like an arbitrarily small amount for a story, but the idea is to create very short fiction that can be consumed quickly while people are browsing. In the future, this may be increased slightly, but for now that’s all there is. It’s a challenge, but I think some people find it fun.
You can also find Miniature Fiction on twitter @MiniatureFic and by emailing me at
[email protected] Enjoy and let me know what you think.
All stories on the site and appearing in this book are Copyright © 2014 by Pat Lane
1. Oracle
A violent group of the hordes were pounding on my door, I just barely had enough time to send off my report before the first one broke through.
2. Susi, Sadness, and Slutty Shirts
Sitting alone in the Sushi Palace, Suzanne downed another shot of some foreign brew. Drunkenly leering at one of the servers, she pulled down the center of her already slutty shirt. The server, David, didn’t giver her a second thought.
3. O.M.A.C.
The inaugural Organized Monopoly Alcoholics Convention started fine. Once the alcohol really got flowing, those battles over trades got violent. Perhaps this would be the first, and last, O.M.A.C.
4. Sweet Revenge
My best friend played a Halloween trick on me, scared me pretty good with a glow in the dark skeleton. Some would say my plan to have a stray dog chew his face off was going too far... but I think its fine.
5. I’m Having a Moral Crisis
I’ve been offered the chance for a lot of money, life changing money, but it would mean betraying my best friend. s on the one hand I have a two decade friendship. But on the other hand, I’ve hated him for years.
6. I Kinda Cheated on You Too
I told my girlfriend I kissed another woman one time, she said she understood and had a “similar” experience. i won’t bore you with the details, but I don’t think basketball teams are the equivelent of kissing one girl one time.
7. My Constant Nightmare
Bees, it always has to be bees; why must it always involve bees?
8. Point of Order
The raging dictator stood in front of the whole United Nations, screaming obscenities and proclaiming all the ways he’d destroy the world. Boldly, the French President stood, appearing to stand up to the monster. “Point of order, I had the floor and was discussing worldwide art preservation....”
9. Drunk Softball
I watched other players do it for years, play community softball completely drunk. I decided it’d be fun to give it a try. After I fell over the 3rd time and threw up on second base I realized this may not have been the best decision.
10. Super Bowl Bet
Most people bet on rational things, like the winner, or the score. I make much rarer bets, like how many times the commentators say something stupid. I’ve put $25,000 on 150 stupid comments.
11. Morals
The hero stood before the assembled media, the savior of the country and the whole world. The media wanted to know how he grew up so strong, with such courage and high moral character. The hero breathed deep, “It all started with Dr. Seuss....”
12. Walking in the Rain
Every morning I grab my dog and go for a walk, my lone companion. Today, like every day for a week, the rain pours down on us. I keep going because this walk is part of our ritual, its just me, Diesel, and my crushing loneliness.
13. Tension In The Workplace
My co-worker wasn’t happy with me; I didn’t do anything wrong, but I also knew there was no point in arguing with someone’s emotions. You could cut the tension with a knife, but maybe I’d cut them instead...
14. Corporal Punishment
America is, let’s face it, going bankrupt trying to house millions of prisoners every year. As the Senator of Texas, I had a solution, but I knew the timing wasn’t right. Some day I knew America would be ready for the return of public shaming, beatings, and forced servitude.
15. Withholding
I examined my personal retirement report and knew I wasn’t contributing enough. Sure, I had the companies plan as well, but deep down we all knew they’d never pay us after we stopped working. It was just so hard to put off money when I could be buying DVD’s or pick-up trucks.
16. Oracle 2
The information gatherers, those people like myself who had the means and will to find out the state of the world and report it, decided on a new mission. We needed to determine the best “safe zones”, the areas free from the plague and the hordes. Then we needed to come up with rules and methods to run these little societies, scary to think I’d be helping control the human populations future.
17. Hide Your Face So The World Will Never Find You...
My crime was monstrous and I was on the run. I knew the only way to hide was to conceal my identity, so I mutilated my own face, performing an act that any horror movie could only hope to replicate. My crime was that bad, stealing from a Starbucks is truly unforgivable.
18. Ask No Questions, Have No Fear
Fear is what prevents us all from making the absolute most of ourselves. Fear prevents us from taking the big risks, risks which could have huge payoffs. It’s for that reason I’m injecting myself with an experimental drug to take away all my fear... forever.
19. #Occupy My Heart part 4
The Tea Party and the #Occupy movement was once again clashing on a battlefield of words, this time on the eve of the Presidential Inauguration. Steven was sneaking out of Jenn’s tent in the Occupy camp before sunrise. He thought he’d gotten away clean, but he was seen by someone who knew him as a Tea Partier, the hated enemy.
The Shadow of the Park
People think Disney is the happiest place on Earth. But their parks have shadows, deep, dark shadows where the dregs of society cling. I mean, do you realize that people who go there drive Chevy's?
20. Dear Old Friends
I saw an old friend from high school, guy I used to hang out with a lot, all the time really. We went to a bar and talked about old times, got a drink and toasted to "friendship." The alcohol burned my throat as I thought about how much I hated him.
21. Surrender to the Urge
Baker couldn't help himself, his mind - his very soul was crying out for things he knew he shouldn't want. He decided to give into these deep, dark, primal urges. He drove to Popeye's and ordered as much as he wanted.
22. Drum Roll Please...
 
; One last chance is all I had, its all I wanted. I'd had an incredible career, rising from nothing and reaching the highest heights - only to come crashing back down to the bottom. One more night, one more chance was all I had now, so i took a breath and began to sing...
23. The Zombie Defense
It was a bold, somewhat insane plan - other countries were evacuating their citizens and trying to secure "safe zones" from the zombies. The President in America had a decidedly different plan, arming up. America was the most heavily armed society in the world; he ordered everyone to get a gun and stock up - the zombies needed to be killed.
24. A Taste of Joy
I spent weeks playing Mass Effect 3, desperately seeking fun or joy of any kind. I didn't experience any joy at all, I never did in anything in life, until I finally beat it. For a moment I felt it, but just like that it was gone; it was the most I'd felt in years.
25. Bazinga!
The moment of triumph finally came, I needed something to say. It had to be something that would proclaim