"Gabrielle." He said her name in a low voice. Softly.
She turned back to him, her gaze a little wary. Finally. He was getting somewhere. He wanted her to see him. Just him.
He bent his head and took her mouth. There was no thought. His body just reacted, just needed, and he dragged her to him, his tongue stabbing deep, his mouth hot and urgent. She didn't hesitate. She opened for him. Went wild for him. Her mouth as ravenous as his.
It took restraint and discipline not to keep kissing her. His body was already hot and hard and aching. He knew he could have her. She would give herself to him without hesitation, just as she'd kissed him. Holding nothing back. Her body was his. She'd given him that, committed herself that far. He thought that would be enough for a while, but he found he wanted more. It was that little rebellion. The "dig up a grave" that got under his skin.
He lifted his head, his gaze searching hers. "Tell me what else you need tonight. Look around. Clothes? Anything at all to make you feel more comfortable."
"I actually did ask my sister how to do the clothes thing," Gabrielle admitted. "I like nice clothes. Although in the evenings when I was by myself, before I was Carpathian, I would sit in my comfy sweats and sip a glass of merlot. It was nice to wind down after dealing with hot viruses."
"What else did you ask your sister to teach you?" He took her hand and tugged her across the room to the chairs in front of the crackling fire.
"The first thing I wanted to learn was shapeshifting. I loved the idea of flying. It seemed like it would be pure freedom."
He had never thought of it that way. Not once. Shifting and flying was something he took for granted. The ability had never been a gift to him, but seeing it through her eyes, shapeshifting and soaring through the sky took on an entirely new meaning.
"When did you learn?"
She bit her lip and ducked her head so that clouds of gleaming black hair fell around her face, hiding her expression from him. She waved her hand and instantly she was wearing soft drawstring pants that clung to her hips and shaped her legs. Her top was short, barely covering her midriff, exposing a small strip of intriguing skin.
"Gabrielle," he prompted. "We made a pact to talk to each other. You do not like me in your mind. I have tried to be cognizant of your privacy, even when I did touch your mind."
"Would you change these chairs to the picture I have in my mind?"
It was the first time she'd invited him to share her mind. It was simply the image of a chair, but she invited him. That, along with her clothes that showed more skin than he'd ever seen a woman expose, sent a rush of hot blood coursing through his veins.
"Is that outfit considered decent in the modern world? I am not complaining, but do women wear such clothes?"
She looked at him from under her long lashes. Her face was soft, her eyes gentle, turning his heart over. "Yes. Some women wear a lot less. I like these clothes when I'm just relaxing. This outfit would be considered casual."
"These are not clothes of seduction?"
She shook her head slowly, and the expression creeping into her eyes and onto her face sent another wave of heat through him.
"Later I'll show you clothes designed to seduce a man."
His cock reacted in spite of his resolve to keep his body under control. He wanted to give her a chance to settle with him. Intense sex every time they got together was great, but it wasn't getting him her heart--and he wanted her heart.
He sent her a slow smile. "I will look forward to that. Show me this chair you desire."
He poured into her mind slowly. Easily. She had dropped her shields. He took care not to look around, not to pry. He wanted her to get used to giving him full access to all of her. Everything was his, and he wanted it. He wasn't going to accept limitations in their relationship. The chair she wanted looked very comfortable. Deep. Wide. Overstuffed. He switched out both chairs immediately, aware she hadn't answered his question about when she'd learned to shapeshift. She had avoided it. He didn't make the mistake of looking in her memories.
"Is this right?" he asked, putting his hand on the back of the chair nearest the fire.
She flashed a pleased smile and sank down. "It's perfect."
He took the one beside hers. He had to admit, it was a very comfortable chair, almost decadent.
"Do you like it?"
Her voice was shy. Hesitant. He reached over and took her hand, bringing it to his mouth, kissing her knuckles before letting her go. Immediately both her hands went to her lap, her fingers twisting together.
"Very much. When did your sister teach you about shapeshifting?" He kept his voice gentle, knowing he usually sounded as if he were making demands or giving orders.
She moistened her lips and looked up at him, still nervous, still not relaxing the way she did when he held her.
He tipped her face up to his. "Settle, Gabrielle. You are safe with me."
She started to reply, bit it back and took a deep breath.
"You have to be able to talk to me. We are just talking, getting to know each other. I respect the fact that you prefer me to wait to share your mind. If that would be easier for you . . ."
She shook her head. "Not yet. I'm not there yet."
"I see that, kislany. We are just talking."
She nodded. "I know. I do know that. It's just that . . ." She raised her eyes to his. "You said you were going to punish me. Well. Maybe not in those words, but you were angry with me and said if I didn't do what you said . . ." She trailed off again.
"And you're nervous about that?"
She nodded. Bit her lip. Twisted her fingers in her lap. He laid his hand gently over hers, stilling her fingers.
"O jela sielamak, even if I do punish you for putting yourself in danger, I would never hurt you."
"How was I in danger?"
He heard the little bite in her voice. He should have known. She couldn't light on fire for him the way she did if she didn't have passion in her. If she didn't have a backbone. He had misread her. She wasn't nearly as submissive as he thought. She had wanted to please him. She had wanted to make up for her earlier betrayal that, now, knowing the facts, wasn't as much of a betrayal as he'd first thought.
He liked that she wanted to please him. He liked that a great deal. "That woman traveled with assassins. I was not there to protect you. Already, these people turned your life upside down. You told me you were attacked by them and had to be converted by the prince. Not by your lifemate, but by another. Because I was not there to watch over you."
She blinked at him, and he knew he had revealed something important to her and she got it. His anger was directed more at himself than at her. He detested that he had left her in order to help feed the ancients and make certain they were safely contained in the ground again before returning to her. He had been delayed by the battle with the master vampire's lesser vampires and during that time, someone had penetrated his resting place when he considered her safe. He hadn't even set up safeguards to protect her. That was on him. That would always be on him.
"Aleksei."
Just his name. His heart turned over at her tone. He knew she had forgiven him everything just by the tone she used saying his name. Like music.
"It is my privilege and my duty to protect you from all harm," he said.
"I'll take more care," she promised. "You couldn't know she was going to be there. She heard me crying and just came in," she admitted. "I didn't even hear her."
That didn't make him feel any better. "Why were you crying?"
She swallowed. He knew answering him honestly was going to be difficult for her, but she was determined to give him truth. His respect and admiration for her rose a little more. She'd promised him truth, and no matter what, she was giving him that.
"I felt like a slut. I like having sex with you." Her eyes avoided his. She gazed unseeing into the fire while she made her confession. "A lot, Aleksei. I like it a lot. I wanted more. When I'm with you, I'm only thinking of you, an
d that felt like a betrayal of Gary." Her gaze jumped to his face and then she corrected herself. "Of him."
Clearly she was afraid of saying his name aloud to him. He'd done that. He'd made it so she couldn't discuss her feelings with him. That was why she'd turned to a stranger. Again. Totally on his shoulders.
"Then when you left and I thought that, it felt like a betrayal of you."
"Gabrielle, you have not betrayed me. I was wrong to make you think that. I did not know you had been human. You were not guided as you should have been. These mistakes are mine, not yours. I had not felt emotion in hundreds of years. I was so far gone I had to lock myself away to protect my own kind. Even now, there are darkness and demons inside of me."
"That isn't necessarily a bad thing, Aleksei," she said, her voice shy.
He loved the sound of her voice when she talked to him in that tone.
"I like you a little scary. It's exciting."
"Do you know what is truly exciting?" he asked.
Her eyes darkened. Smoldered. Sexy as sin.
"The thought of seeing the clothes meant to seduce a man."
13
Aleksei stayed very still, willing Gabrielle to comply. He wanted her to make a move, to show him she wanted him as much as he wanted her. He was beginning to need her. Not the allegiance of a lifemate, but the vow, the promise of a true lifemate. He wanted her to want him. To see him. He had to admit, he hadn't given her much. He intended to change that.
"Sometimes it takes me a couple of times to get the clothes right and inevitably I forget something," Gabrielle admitted.
He liked that she told him that. It was a small thing, but still, it was something she was giving him, a piece of herself.
"And the shapeshifting? Do you make mistakes with that?" That would be worrisome. If Gabrielle's clothes weren't perfect, that would still be perfectly fine, but shapeshifting was dangerous if one didn't know what they were doing. He didn't like that she was so reluctant to discuss that with him.
She took a breath. "I shifted for the first time the night I came here to confront Gary." She bit her lip. "Um. Him," she corrected.
"Kislany." He called her baby gently in his language. "You can say his name to me. It is not just you who needs to come to terms with this. I do as well. And I am." Slowly. Very slowly. He wanted to rip the man's heart out, but she didn't need to hear that. "Tell me about shifting. If you were converted some time ago, why did your sister wait so long to teach you anything?"
"It was my fault," Gabrielle said hastily. "Joie is very busy. She's gone a lot. I was busy doing a lot of research."
He touched her mind. He couldn't stop himself. Gabrielle was clearly choosing her words carefully because she didn't want him to think less of her sister. He inhaled sharply.
"Where did you get the idea that you were less than your sister? Or your brother?" It came out before he could censor. Before he wanted to censor. Her mind was more than just confused. She really believed that ridiculous notion.
He saw the instant retreat. Felt it. He reached out and caught her face, turning it back toward him. "You are not less than anyone. She was not doing work that was needed more than what you were doing."
"As soon as I asked her, she showed me," Gabrielle said in a small voice, a whisper of sound.
His heart turned over. Her mother had done this to her. Made her feel small and powerless. She didn't have the personality to deal with the temper tantrums. And she'd been too young. Too sensitive. Too intelligent. She'd buried herself in the acquisition of knowledge and no one noticed she'd retreated--gone into her own mind and lived there. She was too young for the crowd around her in school, and again, she simply disappeared into studies and into her own mind.
He realized that had become a pattern with Gabrielle. When she'd been traumatized, stabbed repeatedly by the assassins who hunted Carpathians on the pretense that they were vampires, she had retreated into her own mind. No one had noticed. Not even her sister. Not the prince who was responsible for her. No one had taken care of her. They hadn't taught her the very fundamentals of being a Carpathian. To feed. To sleep in the soil where she would be rejuvenated and protected. Safeguards. Shapeshifting. They had given her nothing. It was no wonder she thought herself less than others. To them, it seemed she had no value.
Gary had noticed her. He had realized she needed friendship. Help. Someone to talk to, to share her work and laugh with her. To pay attention. It was no wonder she thought herself in love with the man. He was the only one who really showed her any interest or kindness.
Aleksei shifted out of the chair, opened her thighs and wedged himself between them, kneeling on the floor there between her legs. He framed her face with his hands. "Without you, Gabrielle, I would be either vampire or gone from this world. Without you, the thought of you every single rising, I would have succumbed to the darkness growing in me. I took a vow, for you, that I would never dishonor you. You kept me sane. You did that."
Her breath caught in her lungs. She shook her head. "No, Aleksei, that was you. You're an honorable man. You stood fast against the darkness."
He held her gaze captive. "I made that vow to you, Gabrielle. That vow for my lifemate flows in letters across my back. For you. To you. Whether I found you or not, I knew you. I saw you, there in my mind. In my heart. I knew you would be passionate and sweet. That you would give me whatever I asked for. And that is you. You always give me what I ask for."
"I disobeyed you," she whispered.
"I am not talking about obedience. When I asked you if you would wear your hair down for me when we were alone, you said yes. You gave that to me. Every time I have asked you for something, you have said yes. You give it to me. I had no idea you would be this beautiful, but I knew you. I talked to you. Each rising, before I went hunting, I told you I would be there for you. I would give you everything you wanted or needed. That I would keep you safe. I would protect you. I would love and cherish you. I meant those things. You saved me. You did that, no one else."
She shook her head. "This is why you were so angry. I understand it better now. I betrayed you when you needed me most."
He stilled her face. "No, o jela sielamak, which means 'light of my soul,' because that is what you are to me. The light of my soul when I had none. When I was nothing but darkness."
"Aleksei." She whispered his name. A denial.
"You are the most important person in my world. I know you are afraid of me. I have demons. The darkness resides in me. I control my world. I want my woman to myself. I want her devoted to me. None of those things is easy to live with, and when you combine them, it makes it particularly difficult. It is no easy task to take me on, but always, always, know that you are the most important person in my life."
"You scare me most of the time, Aleksei," she admitted.
He smoothed his hand over her dark hair. "I know I do, kislany, but fearing me makes you come alive."
She took a breath and let it out, nodding. Giving him that. She was reluctant and embarrassed to admit it, but still, she gave the admission to him.
"I cannot stop being who I am, Gabrielle. I will always be controlling. I will do my best to try to remember you are modern, but I have centuries of being a predator with no one challenging me. When you challenge me, it makes me crazy. It makes me need to dominate you. To show you who you belong to. I need you to give in to me."
She gave him a faint smile, her fingers trailing along his jaw. "It's kind of nice to have someone else making decisions, especially when I question every decision I'm making. I can't be any different, though, either, Aleksei, and I'm not all about obeying."
He laughed softly. "Then we will have to make certain both of us enjoy your disobedience."
"Is that possible?"
"Oh, yes, my innocent, it is very possible. You will learn that lesson this night. We have many lessons to enjoy together. We can practice shapeshifting so I will know you are safe, and then we will continue until you feel as if you
were born Carpathian and are powerful in your own right. Does that sound like a plan?"
She nodded.
For the first time she relaxed completely, and she looked happy.
He ran his hand down her front, from her throat to her lap. Light. Possessive. Claiming her. "You can start by showing me these clothes of seduction."
"I don't think you need clothes of seduction to be seduced," she said, her long lashes veiling the sudden sultry expression in her eyes. "I think you get all revved up without them."
His eyebrows shot up. She was teasing him. He'd never been teased--or if he had, he didn't remember. It tasted wonderful on his tongue. Her smile. The sound of her voice. The teasing tasted like Gabrielle and filled his mouth with the exquisite flavor he was so addicted to, the one he craved and now needed so urgently.
"What's your favorite color, Aleksei?"
Her voice came out husky. Sensual. A whisper that had blood pounding in his cock.
"Color?" he repeated.
"You must have one color you like more than others."
He didn't understand where the conversation was going but he was willing to go along with it because her beautiful eyes promised him paradise.
"I like fire. Red."
"Of course you do." Gabrielle inhaled sharply, drawing Aleksei's masculine scent deep into her lungs. She should have known he would prefer red.
She kept her gaze burning deep into his, waved her hands slowly down her body, letting her fingertips skim the sides of her breasts, trace her tucked-in waist and the flare of her hips. Her touch continued down her thighs. All the while, she pictured the daring image in her head of the sexiest lingerie she'd seen.
The camisole was a deep red, made of stretch floral lace, revealing and concealing, but definitely showing off her abundant curves. The front had a mock corset detail, so that the ties were crisscrossed but showed an abundance of skin. The garters attached to red fishnet stockings that were topped with floral lace. The small, red thong was more stretchy lace, and she had made certain she was smooth and bare for him.
Aleksei sank back on his heels, his face going hard, lust fueling the fire in his gaze. "Stand up," he whispered, almost hoarsely.