Nothing Left To Lose
Part 1: Guarding The Broken
By Kirsty Moseley
Copyright © 2017 Kirsty Moseley
All rights reserved.
The right of Kirsty Moseley to be identified as the Author of the Work has been asserted by her in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted , in any form or by any means without the prior written permission of the publisher, nor be otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.
All characters in this publication are fictional and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental.
Nothing Left to Lose, Part 1: Guarding the Broken was originally published in 2013 under the title Nothing Left to Lose which has been broken down and split into two parts. Copyright for the original work was filed in 2013.
Acknowledgements
I just want to say a huge thank you to Judi Perkins at Concierge Literary Designs and Photography for the beautiful cover – and for the patience with me when I had no clue what I wanted but kept making suggestions anyway. Thank you for creating exactly what I didn’t even know I wanted! Love you, woman!
This book is for Lee – my real life Ashton (just without the SWAT uniform). Love you, forever and always. xx
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter One
Sweet sixteen is a day that every girl should remember as special in their lives. In some cultures, it’s even considered to be the start of passage into womanhood. My sixteenth was anything but sweet; it was more like the passage into hell on earth. March 12 was the day my dreams died and my life was sent into a downward spiral of pain, grief and terror. My sixteenth birthday left an irrevocable scar on me, and was the beginning of events that I would see repeatedly in my nightmares.
Right now I was standing in the cold of the night, queuing for admittance outside club Ozone – unknowingly waiting for my traumatic ordeal to begin. The balls of my feet were already aching, a product of the ridiculously high heels that I wore. The cool wind whipped around me, making the little black dress that I was wearing billow around my thighs. My perfect boyfriend, Jack Roberts, was rubbing my arms, trying to warm me up. We’d been standing in line for the club for almost an hour, and finally were quite near the front.
“Jack, I’m not sure this is gonna work. Maybe we should just go watch a movie or something?” I whispered, eyeing the doorman, who was looking at the line suspiciously.
“Anna, it’ll work. You asked me to take you to a club for your birthday, so I’m doing exactly that,” he replied, cupping his chilly hands around my face.
I looked at him and my heart stuttered. I loved this boy with everything I had in me. He was kind, loving, caring, generous, thoughtful, and not to mention handsome. With his short blond hair and sparkling blue eyes, he was every girl’s dream. Literally. Every girl I knew was in love with my boyfriend, but he had only ever had eyes for me. We’d met when we were five years old. He’d asked me to be his girlfriend the first time I saw him, and we’d been together ever since. He was my everything, and we would be together forever. We already had everything planned – finish school, then college, then Jack would become a doctor like he’d always wanted to be, and I would become an artist. Eventually, we would get married and have kids. Perfect.
Three months ago, Jack had asked me what I wanted to do to celebrate my birthday; he said that I could choose anything in the world and we would do it. So I decided to go out to a club, and then I wanted to stay at a hotel, where we would have sex for the first time. After three months of planning and scheming, we had finally convinced our parents to let us stay out. Jack had gotten us both a fake ID card, and I was so excited that I could barely contain myself.
Now that we were here though, in the cold, surrounded by half-drunken people, all I wanted to do was go back to the hotel and have him run his hands all over my body to warm me up, and then we would finally be together physically.
I smiled up at him, my stomach clenching in anticipation. He smiled back and bent his head to kiss me. I melted against him. When Jack kissed me, I felt amazing, like my heart was flying, and like I was the luckiest girl in the world. His hands slipped down to my ass, squeezing gently, causing a small smile to tug at the corners of my mouth.
When he broke the kiss, he pulled back, grinning at me. His eyes sparkled in the dim street lights. “I love you, Anna.”
My heart throbbed again as my whole body broke out in goosebumps. I loved the sound of those three words coming out of his mouth; I still wasn’t used to hearing them even after all these years.
“I love you too,” I replied, and I did. I loved him more than anything. He kissed me again, pulling my body closer to his.
A gentle tap on my shoulder made me jump and break the kiss.
“Hi,” a male voice said from behind me.
I turned around to see a man who was probably in his mid-twenties. He wasn’t in the line of people waiting to enter the club; he stood the other side of the ropes. He was quite good-looking, with nicely styled, dark brown hair and brown eyes. A sleek, black, button down shirt covered his broad shoulders, and he’d paired it with black pants and extremely expensive-looking shoes. He was looking me over slowly.
“Er, hi,” I replied, smiling sweetly, trying to be friendly in case he worked here. He wasn’t on his own; two other guys stood behind him.
“I’m Carter,” the brown haired guy said, holding out his hand for me to shake.
“Anna.” I put my hand in his, shaking it politely. He didn’t let go, instead he pulled me towards him, away from Jack.
“I can get you in if you want, saves you waiting in the cold,” he offered, smiling. My insides bubbled with excitement at the thought of getting into the club. I looked back at Jack, who was frowning angrily and glaring at my hand that the guy still held.
“Yeah? That’d be great! It’s freezing out here,” I chirped happily, trying not to jump up and down on the spot from excitement.
Carter laughed. “Come on then, Anna.” He nodded to one of the people that he was with, and they immediately unclipped the rope so I could step out of the line.
I reached back and grabbed Jack’s hand, grinning ecstatically.
“Er, Princess, your boy’s not invited,” Carter said, sneering at Jack as if he was something he’d just stepped in.
Confusion settled over me. “What? I thought you said you could get us in.”
He finally let go of my hand and stepped back. “I said I could get you in. We don’t need any spectators.” He jerked his chin towards Jack as his eyebrows furrowed in annoyance.
I frowned angrily. What a jerk! He’d interrupted me and Jack making
out, but thought I’d go into the club with him and leave Jack outside? “Right, well no thanks, I’m with my boyfriend. I thought you meant both of us. Sorry.” I took the rope back out of the other guy’s hand and clipped it back to the ring, then wrapped my arms around the love of my life, glaring at Carter.
Carter shrugged. “Suit yourself. Maybe you’ll save me a dance.” He smirked at me before he turned and walked straight into the club.
“What a jackass!” I growled, watching his disappearing back. Jack laughed, and all my anger melted away instantly at the sound. “What’s so funny?” I asked, smiling at him.
“You just can’t help yourself, can you? You make guys fall for you without even trying.” He grinned as he wrapped his arms around me, pulling me closer to his body.
“I know, it must be my irresistible charm,” I joked, fluttering my eyelashes.
“Either that or your incredible legs,” he teased, hesitantly rubbing his hands over my thighs. I slapped his chest playfully and pulled him down to kiss me again.
After about another half an hour, we were finally ushered through into the club with no problems. The doorman barely even glanced at our IDs. Once we were through the door, I jumped up and down, squealing excitedly.
“This is awesome!” I cried, grabbing his hand and immediately pulling him to the dance floor. The music was so loud you could almost feel the vibrations through the floor.
“Let’s get a drink,” he shouted in my ear after a couple of songs. I nodded and he took my hand, leading me towards the bar. We had a quick drink and then went straight back to dancing, losing ourselves in the rhythm of the loud music. He had one hand on my backside the whole time, making me feel hot and bothered. When he bent his head and kissed me, I tangled my hands in his hair, kissing him back with everything I had. We’d only been inside for an hour, but I was ready to leave. The club was fantastic but what I really wanted was what we planned for after – my night with him.
“Jack, want to go?” I asked, running my hands down his chest. He grinned at me and nodded eagerly. He had been ready to take our relationship to the next level for the last six months but we’d wanted to wait until we were both sixteen.
He took my hand and we made our way out of the club, weaving through the crowd of drunken people that were milling around enjoying their night. As we got near the stairs that led down to the front lobby, the guy that I spoke to in the line outside, Carter, stepped out and held his hand in front of us to stop.
“Hi, Princess. How about that dance?” he asked, looking me over slowly.
“No thanks, we’re leaving,” I declined confidently.
“Oh, I don’t think so.” He smiled and took my hand, yanking me forwards, away from Jack. My mouth popped open in shock.
“Get your fucking hands off her!” Jack growled menacingly, stepping forward. I looked back at him with wide eyes, wondering if there was going to be some kind of fight. Before I could even comprehend what had happened, someone grabbed him from behind, holding his arms behind his back securely.
I struggled to get out of Carter’s hold, ripping my hand from his. “Get the hell off me! Let him go! I don’t want to dance with you; I’m leaving with my boyfriend!” I cried angrily.
Carter smiled wickedly, not seeming bothered by this confrontation in the slightest. “One dance is all I ask, and then you can go,” he offered, waving his hand dismissively. Jack made a furious snorting sound so the guy that was holding him shoved him roughly against the wall, holding him there. I screamed and looked around wildly for some help.
“For fuck’s sake! You touch her and I’ll kill you!” Jack growled.
“No one speaks to me like that!” Carter shouted angrily.
He stepped forward and punched Jack in the face, splitting his lip. Almost instantly, blood poured down his face. Carter pulled his arm back, obviously about to deliver a second blow. He looked murderously angry; his whole face was contorted in rage. Panic rushed through my system at the thought of this guy hurting Jack. I couldn’t let that happen. I wouldn’t.
“No! Okay, okay, I’ll dance! One dance, just please don’t hurt him, please,” I begged, with tears rolling down my cheeks.
“No, Anna!” Jack shouted, spitting blood onto the floor. I looked at him and felt my chin quiver at the sight of his bleeding face. My heart was beating so fast that I thought I would pass out.
“It’s alright. One dance, I don’t mind,” I lied, forcing a small smile.
Carter laughed and grabbed my hand, pulling me towards the dance floor. He pulled me into his chest, wrapping his arms around me tightly, his face inches from mine. I felt sick; my skin was crawling. I turned my face away, refusing to look at him as he ground his crotch into my hip. Bile rose in my throat, so I quickly swallowed it down. One of his hands slipped down to my ass, the other onto my thigh. I closed my eyes and willed the song to be over; my body was shaking in anger and fear. I just prayed they weren’t hurting Jack while I wasn’t there.
Finally, after what seemed like forever, the song finished. I put my hands on his chest and pushed as hard as I could, but he didn’t let go, he just held me tighter, laughing.
“You know, you’re so beautiful, Princess,” he breathed in my ear.
“Please, you said one dance, please,” I begged, trying to squirm out of his hold.
“I’ve changed my mind. One’s not enough,” he purred, kissing my neck.
I gasped and pushed him again, panic washing over me as I squirmed, trying to get some distance between us. This time he dug his fingers into my sides roughly. Pain shot through me, making me cry out, but no one could hear because the music was still thumping around us.
“Please! Why are you doing this?” I cried, tears falling down my face.
He ran his tongue up my face, licking my tears away. “Mmm,” he breathed; it was almost a moan of appreciation. He slipped his hand under my dress and rubbed his fingers against my panties.
Immediately I clamped my legs together to try and stop his touch. “No! Please let me go. Jack!” I screamed, thrashing, trying desperately to get out of his hold. No one even batted an eyelid at us.
“Fine, let’s go find your precious Jack,” he sneered, pushing me roughly towards the stairs. I stumbled up the stairs as fast as my legs would carry me. My heart was in my throat the whole time. When I got to the top, my eyes settled on Jack; he was still being held against the wall by the same blond guy. As soon as he saw me, he started to struggle against the restraining hands.
“Let him go, please,” I begged, trying to get to him. I saw Carter nod his head and instantly the other guy let go. As soon as he was free, Jack grabbed me and pushed me behind him protectively.
“Whoa, easy there boy, no harm done,” Carter mused, sneering distastefully. “Although your girlfriend there is sexy as hell.” He looked me over slowly, licking his lips.
I cringed into Jack’s back, my skin crawling because of the way he was looking at me. Suddenly Jack launched himself at him, his fist connecting with Carter’s stomach. Carter doubled over with a groan and the two men he was with grabbed Jack again as he fought and struggled against their hands. I looked around for help, but no one was coming. Why was no one helping us? People weren’t paying even the slightest bit of attention to us as they drank, laughed and danced around us, not even looking in our direction as the music thumped and vibrated off the walls. My hands were shaking; my heart was beating way too fast. I already knew they were going to hurt him. All I could think was that he’d said we could leave, Carter had said we could go, so why did Jack have to do that?
“Please, please!” I screamed as one man held him and the other punched him over and over in the stomach. I grabbed at the one hitting him, trying to pull him away but Carter’s arms wrapped around me, lifting me off my feet and pulling me back a couple of paces.
“Door,” Carter barked angrily.
The blond guy nodded, and suddenly they were dragging Jack away. I jerked out of Carter’s
grasp and ran after them, still crying and screaming hysterically. They dragged him through a fire door. As I reached to try and help him again, Carter grabbed hold of my arm roughly and slammed the door behind him so we were outside on some sort of fire escape. He threw me backwards, making me lose my footing and stumble into the wall. The side of my head connected with the rough bricks; the pain and shock of it made my vision cloudy. I could feel the slight trickle of blood down the side of my face. I squeezed my eyes closed, fighting against the pain that was making my legs weak.
I could hear Jack grunting and groaning, so I forced my eyes open against the blackness that was trying to engulf me. He was on the floor and they were taking turns kicking him; his face was covered in blood, his eyes desperate and scared.
I couldn’t breathe. This was like something out of a nightmare, a nightmare that I couldn’t escape from.
I needed to stop this – now. “What do you want? I’ve got money, I can get you money! Please?” I screamed. One of the guys pulled out a metal-looking thing like the police have; he snapped it out and started beating my already broken boyfriend with it. I heard the bones crack in his arm. “PLEASE STOP! I’ll do anything. PLEASE?” I screamed, gasping for breath. I crawled over to Jack and wrapped my arms around his broken body.
“Run,” he croaked, his voice barely above a whisper. He squeezed his eyes shut, his jaw clenching tightly as he groaned.
“Jack, please. You’re okay, it’s okay. I love you. Please,” I begged, sobbing against his bleeding face.
He winced and put his arm around me, digging his fingers into my back. “Run, Anna. Get away, please!”
Carter’s hands clamped around my upper arms, pulling me to my feet and away from Jack. The other two guys both bent and gripped Jack’s arms, pulling him up too. He screamed as they touched him. The sound of his pain made my legs feel weak. Carter wrapped his arms around me from behind and kissed my neck while Jack watched with a horrified expression on his face as he gasped for breath. Carter’s hand snaked up my side coming to rest on my breast, squeezing roughly. Before I knew it was going to happen, I bent over and was violently sick.