Page 18 of Clouds


  Just then the phone rang, and Meredith went to answer it. The airline was calling Shelly in for a flight that left at noon. She had to scramble to get ready and make a call to Mr. Hadley to let him know she wouldn’t be in for the rest of the women’s conference.

  “I understand,” he said. “I sure hope you’ll consider our offer, though. These women have been raving about the conference, saying it’s the best they’ve ever had.”

  Shelly hung up and grabbed her travel bag. She really didn’t want to go. Joining the women’s group to hear the speaker once more was much more appealing. Shelly smiled. She didn’t even know the speaker’s name, but her message had changed Shelly’s life. She was back together with God and knew his love in a way she never had.

  An almost giddy feeling followed her down the island road as she headed for the ferry. The stark winter sun shone through the thin veil of clouds. Even though the sun was weak, it had managed to melt the snow. Shelly hummed all the way, feeling light and content.

  On the flight to Phoenix, she smiled and gave an extra bit of care to each of the passengers. Her happiness seemed to bubble over. When the plane landed, she stood by the door next to the cockpit and bade all the passengers the customary “Bye-bye.” One of the passengers, a large man who had ordered a hot and spicy V-8 when she came around with the beverage cart, stopped and smiled back at her before exiting. She had felt generous and had given him the entire can to drink.

  “You look like a woman in love,” the man said. His breath nearly knocked her over. Shelly wished she hadn’t given him the whole can.

  “Thank you,” she said with a laugh. The truth was she did feel in love, in love with God for the first time in her life. How could she have grown up in the church and missed this?

  During her stay at the hotel, Shelly didn’t watch TV that night. Instead she started to read Psalm 1 and didn’t stop until after eleven o’clock when she could barely keep her eyes open. She put a marker in her Bible at Psalm 134 and fell asleep with a smile on her lips.

  Her return flight left Phoenix at six-forty-seven the next morning. Shelly didn’t feel as tired as she should have after getting only five hours of sleep. She returned with the same crew and ended up having a conversation with one of the women who used to fly Sunlit out of San Jose. According to her, rumor had it that the airline was going on the block at the end of the month. That could mean termination for all employees and rehiring at the discretion of whoever bought them out.

  Instead of feeling panicked, Shelly felt calm. Look how God has taken care of you so far. Six months ago you thought everything was going to fall apart, but your life didn’t collapse. You moved into your dream cabin, you have an awesome friendship with your sister, all your bills are paid off, you have money in the bank, you went to Germany, and you have another job offer. God, you are so good to me! How could I ever doubt you? Whatever happens, I’ll thank you for it.

  After Shelly’s flight arrived at SeaTac, she drove back to Whidbey Island in the pouring rain. The main road to Camp Autumn Brook was closed for repairs, so she had to take a detour that took her around the perimeter of the island. In the backed-up traffic she tried to see between the sloshing windshield wipers what was holding things up. It seemed that all the island traffic had been reduced to two lanes on this, the only available road.

  Shelly never came this way since it was farther than the main road. She hummed contentedly to herself and thought about what she would tell Mr. Hadley. It seemed right and logical for her to go ahead and take the position at the camp, but something made her want to hold back. She couldn’t figure out what it was.

  Looking out the window at the driving rain, Shelly noticed a video-rental store and thought it might be fun to get something to watch tonight, but she remembered she was reading a book and was eager to finish it. Then she remembered the book was the Bible, and she laughed aloud.

  Who would have believed I would turn down a movie to read my Bible?

  Outside the window she noticed a restaurant’s white twinkling lights. The sign above the door read, “Rondi’s.” Without using her blinker, Shelly turned right into the parking area where more than half a decade ago she and Jonathan had parked their bikes.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  It’s really coming down, isn’t it?” the waitress said after Shelly was seated at a small table by the window. The round tables on the patio, where she and Jonathan had sat, were being pelted by the steady rain.

  “I’d like some tea,” Shelly said. “And maybe a sandwich. Do you have turkey?”

  “Sure do. You like a salad to go with that?”

  “No. But do you have any soup?”

  “Tomato bisque,” she said. “The tomatoes are from Rondi’s garden.”

  Shelly smiled when she remembered last time the raspberries had been from Rondi’s garden.

  “Sounds perfect. And I’d like some cream and sugar for the tea.”

  “Ah, a real tea drinker. I’ll bring you a pot of Queen Victoria then. It’s the real thing, leaves and all. I’ll bring you a strainer. Rondi orders this from Murchies in Victoria.”

  Shelly was about to tell this newsy waitress that she wasn’t a purist when it came to a proper pot of tea, but she had just gotten spoiled over the years with adding flavorings to her hot drinks and she didn’t care for straight coffee or tea anymore. It didn’t matter. The woman was off to place the order.

  She returned shortly with a small, china teapot and all the necessary trimmings for a proper tea experience. Shelly thought she should have ordered scones instead of tomato soup and a turkey sandwich. But the food came to her table in a few minutes, and it all tasted good. Sitting back to sip her tea and to think, Shelly watched the pattern of the raindrops on the window.

  She remembered something Jonathan’s mother had once said when they were young. The day was rainy like this, and they were at Jonathan’s house. His mom was helping them make cookies, which Shelly adored doing even when she was young. But her mother rarely had time for baking, and her older sisters didn’t have the patience to help Shelly.

  Jonathan and Shelly were sitting at a tiny kitchen table next to the big picture window that looked out on the sloped backyard. The rain was coming down in sheets, and Shelly and Jonathan were contentedly licking the electric mixer’s beaters.

  Mrs. Renfield looked over at them and then stopped, as if she were trying to see something more clearly. A smile graced her wide mouth, and she said, “You two are like a couple of raindrops racing down the window together.”

  Shelly and Jonathan turned in sync and looked at each other for meaning to his mom’s statement. Then, shrugging in tandem, they turned back to their beaters and licked away. The moment was made memorable by Jonathan’s mom, who laughed so hard her glasses slid off her nose and landed in the bowl of cookie dough.

  But her statement was what Shelly remembered now. “Two raindrops racing down the window together,” she repeated quietly. Not together, Mrs. Renfield. Did it disappoint you, too, when I left? I’m sure you’ll enjoy Elena as your daughter-in-law. You’ll probably be eager for them to give you lots of grandbabies since I know you always wanted more children after Jonathan.

  Shelly finished the last of her tea and silently prayed for Jonathan. She prayed God’s blessing on him and his future marriage. She prayed for Elena’s and Jonathan’s parents and then started to pray for her parents. Shelly paid the bill, leaving a generous tip, and slipped back into the slow-moving flow of traffic. It took nearly forty minutes to reach home, and she prayed the whole way.

  “Oh, good. You’re home.” Meredith said as Shelly quickly closed the door behind her and took off her soaked jacket. She removed her wet shoes and put on a pair of slippers waiting for her by the door.

  In the living room, a hearty fire blazed. Meredith was upstairs in her loft office, which was open to the entryway. She looked down at Shelly and said, “Do you want to go on a road trip with me next week?”

  “A road trip?
Is this for your work?”

  “Yep. It’s a prospective author in Oregon. Should take us about six hours to drive down. Are you up for it?”

  “I don’t know,” Shelly said, making her way up the spiral stairs that led to Meredith’s office. “How long will you be gone?”

  “A day or two. I know you have the camp, and you’re still on call at the airline. I must be crazy to ask you, but I checked into airfare, and it’s ridiculous what they want me to pay for a Seattle to Eugene flight.”

  “What about Seattle to Portland?” Shelly asked, carefully moving a stack of papers from “the big flop chair,” as Meredith called it. Shelly sat down and tucked her feet under her.

  “I checked into that, but I would still need to drive almost three hours to get there from Portland; so I might as well drive the whole way. I just hate going places by myself.”

  “You always have,” Shelly said.

  “I know. So how about it? Do you want to go with me? I’m not above begging or bribing.”

  “It’s only for a day, right?”

  “I think so. We would drive down early on Monday morning and be back by Wednesday afternoon. You could still be here in time for dinner at camp on Wednesday, if they have a group coming in.”

  “That’s not a problem,” Shelly said. “And that’s why I’d consider going. No groups are coming in until that weekend. They wouldn’t need me at all during the week.”

  “What about the airline?”

  “Looks like it might be sold next week. I don’t expect to get too many calls, but I could take my beeper anyway. I could always catch a flight out of Eugene.”

  “This is a yes?”

  “It is a … probably.”

  “All right! Wanderlust girl hits the road again. It’ll be fun. Maybe we can even stop by Aunt Jane’s cabin on the coast.”

  “Wait a minute. You’re turning this into an all-week event.”

  Meredith sat back in her desk chair and propped up her feet on a three-foot-high stack of manuscripts. “Why not? You just said you don’t have to be back until the weekend. I can work anywhere. Have laptop, will travel.”

  “Yeah,” Shelly teased. “Laptop, cell phone, portable fax. You’re a streamlined traveler, all right.”

  “Hey, I am. You even said so after Germany.”

  “You’re right. You were award-winning in your compact packing for Germany.”

  “Germany!” Meredith said. “How could I forget? Big news today from Jana and Mike. I printed out their e-mail. Here, read this.”

  Shelly took the piece of paper and read the tidy little letters in a row across the paper.

  “They’re pregnant!” Meredith squealed out before Shelly had even finished the first line.

  “So I see. How exciting for them; that’s great.” Shelly was about to hand the letter back when a line at the bottom of the page caught her eye. It said, “We also lost all our staff at the base in Belgium; so Mike has been there the last four days. It doesn’t look as if we’ll have new staff arriving until the summer; so we may have to shut down the youth club’s meetings until then.”

  Shelly didn’t say anything to Meredith. Her sister must not have noticed. But Shelly thought about it for the next few days. If all the staff in Belgium had left, that meant Jonathan and Elena were no longer there. What had happened? Were they married? Did they move back to Akron? That’s probably where the wedding was, which would perhaps explain why Shelly didn’t receive an invitation.

  No matter how she explained it away, it still hurt. For five years she hadn’t known where he was. Boulder, Colorado, was her only clue, and then there he was in Belgium. She could almost handle that he was marrying Elena so long as Shelly at least knew where he was. Now he was gone again.

  She considered a dozen different ways to find him. A letter to Mike and Jana would most likely reach him eventually. Or she could e-mail Jana and ask for Jonathan and Elena’s address, saying she wanted to send them a wedding gift, which would, of course, be true.

  She prayed about it, telling her heavenly Father that she wanted to do what was right and best. All week long she had been devouring the Bible, looking not for answers but beyond that. She wanted to know the heart of him who holds all the answers. It struck her that so much of her life she had seen prayer as the way to ask for blessings, the way a child asks Santa Claus for a gift.

  That old paradigm was shattered in this growing love relationship that had begun between Shelly and the Lord. Now she sought not the blessing but the Blesser, not the gift but the Giver.

  Friday morning she decided to ask Meredith if she could use the computer to send an e-mail before she went over to the camp. Meredith set it up for her, and Shelly typed a short note to Jana, congratulating her on her pregnancy and asking for Jonathan and Elena’s address.

  As an explanation to Meredith, who was bound to read it before she sent it out, Shelly said, “I’ve had them on my mind for days. I want to send them a wedding gift and wish them well. Do you think I’m doing the right thing?”

  “Of course. Any communication you have with Jonathan is okay by me. I only wish there wasn’t an Elena in the picture. I know you say you’re fine with it, but I still wish—”

  “I know,” Shelly said, cutting her off. “But take my advice, Meri, and don’t go there.”

  Meredith tapped a few keys and sent the electronic mail zinging over the phone wires to the other side of the world. “A sister can still make a wish, can’t she?”

  “Let me know when you hear back from Jana,” Shelly said, traipsing down the stairs and ignoring Meredith’s question.

  “I will. I promise. The very second I receive e-mail back I’ll tell you.”

  Shelly headed over to the camp through a light drizzle. She needed to give Mr. Hadley an answer about taking the position. They had a meeting set for Monday, but she needed to talk to him today so she and Meredith could start on their trip early Monday. The only difficulty was that Shelly still didn’t feel settled about agreeing to take the job. It made sense for a long list of reasons, but every time she prayed about it, a cloud of hesitancy moved in. She remembered something she had read in Psalms about God leading the children of Israel through the wilderness by using a cloud by day. Shelly looked around at the hovering puffs of mist and thought, If God led them around with a cloud, did that mean the children of Israel were in a fog all the time?

  The silly thought made her smile. But it also reminded her that maybe she wasn’t the only one who ever felt as if she were walking around in a fog instead of floating on a cloud.

  When she met with Mr. Hadley, she told him what was on her heart. “I can’t explain it, but I don’t have a clear answer for you. I don’t feel right about making a commitment yet. Could you give me another week to pray about it some more?”

  “That’s no problem. We’ve had a couple of applications come in, and now we know more clearly what kind of person we want to run the show. Your changes to the setup have made a world of difference, and that means a lot.”

  Shelly told him about taking off with Meredith for the next week, and that was fine with him, too. “It’s a good week to go,” he said.

  “That’s what I thought, since there aren’t any groups coming in.”

  “Not that,” Mr. Hadley said. “It’s Valentine’s Day on Monday. You and Meredith shouldn’t be stuck here in the woods like a couple of spinsters. You should get out to meet people.”

  Shelly knew he meant well, but it was a bitter comment to swallow.

  When they loaded up Meredith’s Explorer on Monday, it was still dark. Shelly remembered Mr. Hadley’s comment and shared it with her sister.

  “Do you think we’re turning into old maids?” Meredith asked once they were on the road.

  “Maybe. It doesn’t bother me as much as it would have a couple of weeks ago,” Shelly said. “I mean, I want to get married someday, but I feel more content and fulfilled right now than I ever have. I know I’m still on an emotional hi
gh with God, but you know what? It’s the most incredible thing that’s ever happened to me. I’ve never felt so complete before.”

  “You’ll get no criticism from me,” Meredith said. “I love seeing what God is doing in you. I have to admit, for a while there I was kind of worried. You never went to church or seemed to have any interest in spiritual things. I prayed for you a lot.”

  Shelly stretched out her legs. “Thanks. God sure answered your prayers. He does that, you know.”

  “What? Answer prayer?”

  “Yes. All the time. I never saw it before. He puts all the bits of life together like a mixed bouquet, and he knows what goes in where.”

  “I hope he includes a tall, dark, and handsome ‘flower’ in my bouquet,” Meredith said with a laugh. “He’d better. I’ve been praying for one for the last three years.”

  “Anyone in particular?”

  “Yes. I want the right one, the one God has picked out for me.”

  “Do you think,” Shelly said, “that there’s really only one man for us, or could we marry just about anyone and be happy as long as we’re going by God’s rules?”

  Meredith paused before saying, “All I know is that there is a man out there somewhere for me, and the day I meet him, I’ll know.”

  “Whoa! No room there for any sloppy mix-ups?”

  “No.”

  Shelly had nothing else to say. They drove on, listening to music as Shelly thought about Jonathan. Meredith hadn’t heard back from Jana yet, but she had brought her computer along; so Shelly might hear from Jana this week.

  They made good time and didn’t stop until they reached Portland. Meredith and Shelly both got out to stretch at a gas station. They forgot that in Oregon only the station attendants can pump the gas, but they were happy to let the uniformed guy perform his duty. They went next door to a small espresso bar to buy some wake-up coffee, and both ordered the Valentine’s Day Mocha Special, which came with a chocolate candy heart.