I stood rocking a bit, clenching Sean close to my chest. My eyes were closed and I tucked his head under my chin. My body trembled frantically because I didn’t know what to do. I felt sick to my stomach like I had never been before.
“Lauren. Lauren, are you okay?” Aaron finally asked, his voice full of concern.
I couldn’t even look at him as Dean Manson’s words continued to ring through my ears. That was when I felt Aaron’s large, calloused hands grab my shoulders, forcing me to stop my swaying and to stare at him. I gazed into his deep, sapphire eyes, which were wide with fear as they locked on mine. My stomach felt ten times worse gazing into his expressive eyes.
“Did he hurt you or Sean?” Aaron questioned slowly, his eyes still locked on mine.
I couldn’t speak because I was afraid I would start crying, so I just shook my head. I knew my voice would betray me.
“Can we please just leave here, now?” I asked feebly.
I felt his arms around my shoulders, holding me securely to him. I closed my eyes and kept them clamped shut, afraid that they would spill their secrets about what had really happened in the house. And what would happen not too far into the future.
“I’m being smooshed!” Sean squeaked as he squirmed. Aaron took Sean from my arms, but I wanted to hold on longer.
The feeling of Sean out of my arms made my hands start to quiver. My hands wouldn’t stop trembling as if a black hole had just formed there to take Sean away from me to never be with me again.
“Lauren! What’s wrong?” Aaron spoke in a freaked out tone.
Aaron pulled me to him and stared down at me. I just wanted to be held in his arms and know this was all a nightmare, that our families weren't actually dead and were just waiting at home for us. Yet I knew that his soothing voice would not tell me such a thing. No matter how many nights I wished upon the stars.
After he grabbed a blanket from behind him and wrapped it around me, Aaron lifted me up and sat on the ground with his arms wrapped securely around me. I looped my arms around his shoulders as I edged closer to him. I leaned my face into the base of Aaron’s neck. I couldn’t bear to lose any more of them—my new family. I couldn’t live if I had to watch more of them die.
With a tender touch, Aaron’s face rested against the top of my head as he closed his arms tighter around me. He rubbed my back, trying to figure out a way to calm me down. I knew I was scaring Aaron. I was scaring myself as well, but I couldn’t help it. I had images of the ones I loved dying before me and I felt helpless. I turned my head slightly to glimpse up at the new one person in my life; Aaron’s intense blue eyes explored my own.
Stretching, I placed his lips against mine for a mere touch without any pressure before I went back to my place at the bottom of his neck. I didn’t care if the others were watching.
“Can we please go now?” I inquired, my voice wavering a bit.
Aaron didn’t even answer. He simply lifted me and gathered the others. We fled into the night, away from the barn and its home. I held Sean’s hand as he held Paige’s and Aaron had an arm around my shoulder when our pace slowed. I knew that Aaron was anxious to know if I had lost my mind or something. I soaked up the silence while the thoughts went through my mind as I strived to figure out what I was supposed to do.
I mean what Dean Manson had proposed was horrible, and he had been asking for something unreasonable, right? To go with him and he’d forget about Aaron, thus leaving my family with Aaron. Or else, he'd hunt every one of us down to kill us slowly and painfully.
I turned to peek at Aaron under my eyelashes, but his attention was up ahead to get us toward safety, not realizing it wouldn’t help at all. I had asked if I could bring the others with me, especially Sean and Paige since they were so young, if I did agree to be with Dean Manson. He of course said no as he claimed they’d be fine with Aaron, at least he wouldn’t kill them. My heart ached as I glanced at Sean and Aaron knowing I’d be leaving them. My brother. I was the last real person in our family that would be there for him. I hoped Paige and Aaron would take good care of him when I left.
Aaron was the only guy that I had really cared about. He stayed with all of us even though we weren’t his problem. Not only that, but Sean and Paige had bonded with him. Then there were the feelings I had been feeling for him for months now.
I couldn’t sit back and watch the whole group die. I paid attention to the direction we headed so I could find my way back to Manson. I knew Aaron was going to be furious with me when he found out. I also knew Aaron would try to think of a way to save us all, but I knew there wasn’t any other way.
Finally we came to a stop in a thick growth of trees. There we all sat in silence, but I knew their eyes were on me, just waiting for me to lose my composure again. I had to wait for them to fall asleep so I could leave. We all sat near one another as I felt everyone’s eyes on me, trying to figure out if they were able to talk or not. I had to make things comfortable or they won’t go to sleep.
“Is everyone alright?” I asked, scanning around the group.
All of them looked tired and scruffy just being there. The cluster of people before me no longer looked like children. Age and wisdom beyond their years lay in all of their haunting eyes. Was I taking the cowardly way out of this life?
“We’re all fine, but the question is are you?” asked Cole.
“I’m fine. I’m sorry, I was just a little spooked.” I shrugged.
I glanced at all of them, except for Aaron. I thought he might see right through my act. Out of everyone, Aaron was the one I couldn’t fool.
“Are you sure?” Aaron asked.
I turned toward Aaron and nodded my head with my eyes closed. I gave a false smile as real as I could have mustered.
“They didn’t hurt me there. Being in there with Manson and his followers just spooked me is all, like I said earlier. Let’s just move on and try to make the best of the situation. I mean, we escaped the man who has been after us for months now.”
I wanted to have some chance of being happy with everyone before I left them. If I didn’t leave that night or early the next morning, Dean Manson would be on the war path for us and there was no chance our little group could win against him.
“I’m just saying we just escaped the man who wants us dead. We should just have a relaxing night for once.”
Aaron was now bluntly staring at the dirt we were sitting on and as he played with the overgrown grass between his fingertips that was greening with spring approaching. His legs were crossed and his once dark blue jeans were torn in places, with dirt embedded into the fabric. The black jacket was zipped up most of the way, hanging a bit on his broad shoulders like on a hanger, but the material seemed to have kept him warm while his shirt underneath was well hidden. I didn’t even remember him picking that jacket up.
“Lauren, I’m cold,” Paige timidly whispered as she was falling asleep.
“Lauren and I will go get some wood. Jill you’re in charge,” Aaron responded as he stroked the top of Paige’s head.
Aaron stood up and put out a hand to help me up. Aaron pulled lightly to get me off the ground while pulling me closer to him.
“Why is Jill in charge again? I’m older than her!” Cole whined.
I noticed that Aaron’s eyes didn’t leave mine as Cole spoke, but they weren’t holding any of the loving magic anymore. Aaron’s gaze seemed like he was trying to read me instead.
I just started to head in a direction, feeling his hands leave mine. I knew that Aaron was following me as I heard the crunch of the earth below his feet. We stayed by the camp so that we could see everyone and I picked up pieces of fallen wood. I stood back up, watching Aaron. He appeared beaten, like he had already lost everything. Almost like he knew I was already gone.
“Aaron, what’s wrong?” I finally asked, not able to take the silence between the two of us.
I staggered closer to Aaron, hearing the ground cracking beneath my feet.
“I just th
ought I lost you and Sean to that man,” a crushed voice came out.
I gave a half smile as my heart sped up. I pushed some of his hair away from his eyes. I returned my eyes to his, which seemed to never have left my face as much as I had been avoiding his.
“What?” I questioned, smiling.
“When he had me, all he talked about was how he was going to use Sean and you to get to me. That he knew that I—” Aaron paused only for a moment. “He knew that I had feelings for you.”
My heart’s beating just came to a halt. I felt tears coming to surface with the lump growing in my throat.
“What… What feelings?” I asked, my voice wavering.
He smirked as he leaned his forehead down against mine while his arms wrapped around my waist tenderly.
“Do you really need to ask?”
I didn’t know what to say. I had just hoped that I was the only one that cared so this escape could be easier, but I was wrong, so very, very wrong. That is why Manson wanted me, Aaron cared for me and my departure would kill Aaron or draw him in.
My eyelids locked to hold back the tears, but failed as two escaped. Quickly, I looped my arms around his neck, hoping he hadn’t seen them. Yet he must have known he backed up just to glide my face near his. With my face between his hands, he used his thumbs to brush away my slow tears.
“Why are you crying?” Aaron’s face was full of concern as his eyes looked into mine. I put on a weak smile.
“Happy tears,” I answered.
Half of his mouth turned up in a smile. Aaron pushed back a loose curl behind my ear with a soft whisper of a touch. My heart was screaming out in anguish as my mind was howling that I had to leave him to save his life.
“We probably should get some wood before the others freeze.” I wanted to hit myself for saying this, but it was going to be hard enough already.
I wasn’t going to make it more difficult by mistreating them right before I left. Why did Aaron have to like me? I never flirted with him or gave him a reason to.
Aaron grinned then locked lips with me, having a hand behind my head with the other on my hip. At first, Aaron kept me close, hungrily pressed against him, but then he pulled away to pick up some wood, leaving me shocked and feeling the need to hit him, yet desiring more.
“We’ll talk more when the others are asleep.” Aaron’s voice sounded like velvet as he sauntered away with the biggest grin on his face.