Chapter Twenty Five: Crossing the line. A couple of days later and I’m still drinking; I look in the mirror at myself, I’m unshaven, the white of my eyes are actually grey in colour and I am a shadow of my normal self. The healthy, vibrant and strong Steve Mitchell has been replaced with an unshaven, grey skinned individual with a hollow face of despair; even my hair looks as if it has not been cut for more than a year. I have to get a grip of myself; I pick up a razor, turn the tap on and splash hot water on my face, it’s time to take a shave and get cleaned up. Over the next couple of weeks my strength returns a little at a time as I start to eat well, run, swim and hit the gym; small pieces of my old self return as I rebuild the real me: the confident, strong soldier has returned, I’m back and it’s time to give Jeff a call. We chat about our nights out in London, the beer and the girls we never seem to score; it’s all good laddish stuff. I finally manage to get a word in edgeways and remind him of what we spoke about after we had played pool. He goes quiet and lets me speak, as if waiting for the moment. ‘Jeff. I’ve got to get back to work tomorrow as I’m skint and the firm won’t hold my job forever, I was given a six week window to sort myself out and it’s over. But as its Wednesday tomorrow and I am at work, can I come and see you Friday night. I have something of great importance to talk to you about’ ‘Steve, come and see me tonight and you may never have to work again.’ ‘What are you on about Jeff?’ ‘Look, you know a little about me now, come and find out who I really am. I have an offer you can’t refuse; it’s exciting, legal and truly a benefit to mankind – see you tonight, about 9pm’. That’s was it, that’s all he said, Jeff had put the phone down and literally left me hanging. I would have to go; tonight.
The next sequence of events were to take me down a road that I least expected to travel; at any other point within my life it would be inconceivable, but now I was on my own and needed friendship of a different kind, help if you like, I was open to anything. Jeff answered the door as I approached, as if he had been waiting for me or had a sixth sense. ‘Hello Steve, come in mate, how are you today?’ ‘Take a look Jeff, see for yourself. Can you not see the white of my eyes and the spring in my step?’ ‘I’m impressed Steve, you look fit and strong; unlike me.’ ‘You have other more serious attributes though Jeff.’ He grins at me in acknowledgement of the flattery, invites me to sit around the dining room table and offers me a coffee; I want to get on with things, but I accept, it seems like the right thing to do. He sits opposite me, leans back in his chair and crosses his very large arms, the forearm muscles bulging under the pressure. He then takes a breath, puffs a little from his pudgy nose and says: ‘You first Steve, what’s on your mind?’ I then proceed to explain that after losing Catriona, with whom I was deeply in love with; I have found a space in my life that needs to be filled and I am very interested in the comradeship that I feel would be available if I was to be accepted for membership in the Freemasons. Would he accept my request to be proposed for membership? The corner of his mouth twitches as he tries not to smile. He leans over the table, pinches my cheek and pats me on the shoulder: ‘Of course I will Steve, of course I will, it will be my pleasure.’ Once you have crossed the line and asked to join this elite club you are immediately aware of being disempowered from normal reality; you are now at the bottom of a very large and tiered structure of power and influence. I will pray at night and hope this decision will not be closely followed by a very large dose of regret. ‘Well thanks Jeff, I appreciate it. I am scared and excited if you know what I mean.’ ‘I do Steve; I was in your place once.’ ‘So what was all this about not working again? Surely that was just talk’.
He informs me that we must move fast, faster than the normal procedures of membership normally allows. He cannot tell me anything until I am an apprentice, and then only specific layers of information will be released to me unless a third degree sanction over rides normal protocol. ‘But what about money Jeff I need to work’ He informs me that he will keep me going until I have reached an appropriate level of instruction, at which point the system will take over and I will receive monies from the mother lodge. An internal project is gaining momentum at a far greater pace than anyone could have imagined and it’s important; in fact it’s of a global scale and will change the face of world politics and the demographics of a certain region forever. Well it all sounded very dramatic but will it pay the bills? Jeff left the room without a word and was gone for a good ten minutes. When he returned, I was sipping my coffee and looking out of the window at the view across town. He lives on the high side of St Marys Cray and you can see for miles, but I prefer it green and was thinking that he really should move out into the green belt of North Kent. A soft but solid thump on the table brought me to my senses and I turned round and looked at Jeff, and then at the table. A tightly packed wad of tatty bank notes sat in the middle of the table; the impact of this vision: a wad of notes that many will never see, sets in your mind an image of instant gain and opportunities, and a realization that it must be ill-gotten gains and someone must be looking for it. ‘Here, this should get you through a few months of bills and expenses.’ I pick it up and stare at it, the look on my face was not one of greed and excitement, but sheer shock at what had just transpired. ‘Bloody hell Jeff, there must be ten grand here; I can never repay this’. I was duly informed that I was not to worry about it, I would earn it soon enough. All would become clear and very soon. I was to enter the brotherhood blind of faith and vision; but become one with worldly knowledge that only a true brotherhood can offer. All he would tell me, as if by way of keeping me interested; was that the only reason I was even being considered for fast tracking was because of my past history of being honourable and brave under duress of criminality; and that world events had leapt forward at an unprecedented rate. My immediate question was? ‘If that qualifies me, what does it qualify me for’? His answer was strong and dismissive: ‘Two days Steve, that’s all you have to wait for, be patient and you will soon learn what it’s all about’. And two days later a very plain, but conspicuous letter landed on my door mat, the envelope and the letter its self were of a light blue paper, an extremely expensive and high quality paper. I opened the letter, it was crisp, heavy even: it was a letter of invitation to an ‘Introduction of members’ meeting at Bromley lodge no: 698. Jeff had proposed my introduction and the process had started. To say I was taken by surprise was an understatement; I never imagined we would move this quickly. Now: If my approach to this was sensible, I could only benefit; whether I became a lifelong brother or not, I would still gain an understanding of what and who was involved. The meeting was set for 7pm tomorrow, so they were not hanging about that’s for sure. I was to attend with my proposer.