have the husband she wanted.
When the simple ceremony was over, everyone gathered at Annie’s uncles’ house for a light reception. They had a little music, a lot of laughing and congratulations. Small gifts were given to each couple.
As was usual, the men congregated in the kitchen, a place they avoided except for parties. They told ribald jokes and slapped the two grooms on the back a lot. The women gathered in the parlor. They reminisced about their honeymoons. They laughed and told veiled stories about how little they knew when they got married.
The members of the Morris family were uncomfortable with the conversations in both rooms. Hixson and Sarah had been cheated out of that bit of innocence.
Charlton, Annie, Momma, Emma and Eliza had a little surprise for Hixson and Sarah. Charlton told the couple, “A crowded house is no place for newlyweds, you know. Annie and I will be going to the new house on her farm. We’ve done our best to come up with a bridal suite for you two. So you can have a little nuptial privacy. Eliza will show you where this afternoon.”
Charlton and Annie had gone to their new home. Eliza brought Hixson and Sarah to a ten acre field on the Morris farm that was lying fallow that year. It was covered in sunflowers while it rested from farming. This late in the year, the sunflowers were eight to ten feet tall and brilliant.
They had taken Hixson’s army tent and two canvas wagon sheets, and made a large tent. Furniture was brought down from the house. It was a little hideaway in the middle of a working farm. A table and two chairs stood inside, with a meal waiting for them. The bed was made. They had even laid a rug on the ground. Charlton had dug a fire pit outside the tent, and got a fire ready to be lit. September was warm, but the nights were cool.
Hixson and Sarah were deeply touched. It was such a thoughtful gesture. Eliza was a little embarrassed. She knew in a vague way why they would want privacy. She kissed each of them and went home.
There was an elephant of unspoken anxiety in the tent when the newlyweds sat down to eat. Neither had much of an appetite; they were too nervous. Hixson had never been one to shy away from something just because it wasn’t easy. So when the sun went down, he lit the fire, and laid a blanket by it.
“Come out and sit with me?” he asked, patting the blanket next to him.
Sarah went out and sat with him, trying not to look nervous. Hixson wrapped his arms around her and held her for a little while. He buried his face in her hair, and softly asked, “Are you scared?”
She paused so long that Hixson thought she couldn’t tell him. “I’m not scared, no. I am a little nervous, I guess, but I know that with you, it will be alright.” Another long pause. “I think I’m more worried that when the moment is there, you won’t be able to forget. I might not be able to make you, um, satisfied. Maybe you won’t want me.” It may have been the most difficult thing Sarah ever had to say out loud.
Hixson held her tightly for a moment, then looked fully into her face. “I’ve been worried that maybe you wouldn’t be able to forget. Or that I might hurt you.” He held her close again and said, “Oh, how could you think I wouldn’t want you? You’re all I’ve wanted since the first time I saw you!” He kissed her ardently, and she responded with equal passion.
Sarah was overwhelmed by the tenderness in Hixson as he loosened her hair, and unbuttoned her dress. The feel of his strong, capable and yet gentle hands on her was so sweet. There was nothing in his loving touch that could remind her of anything unpleasant.
Hixson was astonished at how warm and responsive Sarah was. She looked different to him, too. He had seen her undressed before, but at the time he was so focused on her injuries he didn’t really see her.
He had been to the brothel a time or two after he first enlisted, but he had never seen such a stunning woman. She was perfect, he thought: full, round breasts, tiny waist and slim legs. Her wheaten hair waved around her lovely shoulders and long neck. Her face was calm and beautiful.
It was ironic that Sarah had also seen Hixson undressed because he had been injured. She got a different view as well. He was lean, but very muscular from hard work and long hours. She ran her hands down his upper arms and across his chest and gasped at the pulling she felt inside. The puckered scars on his back and belly were a sign to Sarah that Hixson was always meant to be hers.
“If anything is even a little uncomfortable, just tell me and we’ll stop.” Hixson was kissing her neck.
Stopping was the last thing on Sarah’s mind. “With you, everything will be fine.”
Hixson ran his hands down her back and swept around to her rib cage. He kissed her neck, her shoulders and breasts, smoothing his strong hands over her soft skin and feeling how slight she was.
They lay together in the firelight, under the stars. The anxieties were gone. They stretched out, pressed together, first side by side, then her on top, then him. Hixson was so much taller than Sarah, his chin rested on top of her head, but her toes, stretched out, barely reached his feet.
Hixson brushed his hands from the nape of her neck, all the way down her back and across the curve of her bottom. He couldn’t get enough of touching her, her skin was so soft. Even the smoothness of her legs touching his legs was bliss.
The slightly scratchy feeling of Hixson’s rough hands felt good to her and she loved to have him touching her. She felt his gentle strength wrap around her like a warm blanket. Sarah ran her hands through Hixson’s wavy brown hair, shining in the firelight, and stroked down across his chest and belly.
She was hesitant to reach further for a moment, but only for a moment. A flash of apprehension crossed her mind, and was quickly gone. She felt a silky wetness on Hixson, which made the pulling feeling inside her grow stronger. His passion rose as she touched him, and she soon felt a warm wetness of her own.
Sarah had the sure, confident hands of a healer. It was a talent that let her touch Hixson in all the right ways. At last, she took him in her hands and touched his wetness to hers. His voice was ragged as he whispered in her ear, “Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.” She whispered back.
Hixson caressed the inside of her thighs, and higher, until her breath came in short gasps. Yes, she was sure. This was what love was.
“I’ll be careful.” Hixson breathed, and he was. But Sarah was as ready as he was.
September 17th, 1865--Dover, Pennsylvania
Hixson and Sarah strolled up to the house slowly. They were in no hurry to have the magic spell broken. The worry they had each felt was gone. It was all going to be fine. She still had healing to do, but Sarah was going to be fine.
Momma was peeling potatoes when she saw them from the kitchen window. She stood watching them, hands frozen mid-peel. She had been very concerned that their wedding night might not go well. That would be understandable.
Her son had the look of a contented man, though. Sarah didn’t look traumatized, embarrassed or upset. Maybe everything went alright?
Unaware of their audience, Hixson stopped and held Sarah for a moment. He kissed her passionately, and ran his hand across her bosom. She kissed him back and even though Momma couldn’t see where Sarah had her hand, she could guess.
Hixson was expecting a lot of grinning and winking from his Poppa, and some wicked jokes, too. He considered warning Sarah, but decided against it. Cross that bridge when you come to it, he told himself.
Emma went out to get the eggs and saw them coming. She had been worried, too. All she needed was a quick glance to make her concerns vanish. She couldn’t have been happier. Sarah, who had been like a daughter to her, had found the right man.
Breakfast was huge, and delicious. Poppa was on his best behavior, and only made one comment that might have a double meaning. “Got a good appetite this morning, son?”
Momma punched Poppa on his good arm. “Behave yourself, you old billygoat!” She turned to her new daughter. “Don’t pay no attention to him. Everything is funny to Poppa.”
Eliza was not entirely sure she understood t
he joke, but she had some idea. She, too, hoped it had gone well, whatever exactly ‘it’ was.
Over breakfast, Hixson, Sarah and Emma started making plans about when to leave for Virginia. Emma was naturally anxious to get Caleb. They decided to leave the next day, and take advantage of the autumn weather for traveling. They would take the wagon, not the buggy, so that Emma’s household goods could be brought back with her.
Charlton and Annie came by soon after breakfast, and were surprised to find the family still sitting at table. No one wanted to go to the choring, thinking Sarah would stay in Virginia and wait for Hixson to come back to her. They sat down to coffee and chatted.
Poppa and Momma stood together at the head of the table. When everyone noticed them there, the room grew quiet. “Youngsters, we have an announcement.” Poppa began. “Now that my boys are grown and wed, and little Eliza there growing up so fast...well, your Momma and I went to the lawyer yesterday. We had the farm split into three equal parcels. Charlton, you’ll be getting the south 120 acres next to Annie’s farm. Hixson, you’ll have the west 120. Eliza, you’ll get the east 120 and the house.” Poppa grinned at the shocked looks on his children’s faces.
Momma took over. “Eliza, your Poppa and I were hoping that when you wed, you might consider living here in the house. And letting us stay on. You have time to think about that