Warner pumped under her, his face close to a howl. Extending her tongue, she licked her breasts. “I’ve never…”
“My centerfold pictures don’t do me justice.” She licked at her other nipple.
“Such a tease.” He pounded her at rapid speed, stimulating her for a second time.
“You’re tearing me apart.” Taddy held on to his shoulders and kept her eyes focused on him, like he wanted.
“Go with it, honey, go with it.” He slowly pulled out then back in again.
“I am.” Her body burned again. “I’m coming again.” Not easing up, he drove in deeper.
“Me too—I’m coming—aaah.” His neck muscles knotted, and his eyes dilated. “Love coming the same time as you.”
She massaged his chest while he filled her with his hot seed.
He kissed her as he drained his scrotum inside her. A pillow caught him as he fell back and stretched out. Warner was asleep in a few minutes. The lights from Park Avenue danced over his muscles as his body’s heat kept her warm.
Taddy lay on his chest, feeling loved. She’d waited her whole life to have him. He was hers. Hot tears poured from her eyes. This was what Kiki referred to as crying because one was happy.
In the morning, she woke to him staring at her. But that joy of having him with her only lasted for a brief second. She just remembered as much as she felt her stomach twist, she’d be seeing Irma soon.
“What is it?”
“I have to visit my mother in a little bit.”
“I thought you two didn’t speak.”
“We don’t.”
“When’s the last time you saw her?” Warner’s forehead creased.
“Ages ago.”
“Man.” Warner face sank.
“I haven’t heard a peep in years.”
Speechless, Warner’s mouth hung open. He licked his lips and blinked. “I’m going with you.”
“No. I’m tempted to cancel. But I’ll go. I can’t imagine what she wants. Maybe an epiphany came over her and she desires redemption.” Taddy wasn’t sure if she’d take her parents back in her life. Her mind played various scenarios in her head, one being illness. Another, salvation. Then, the true identity of her real birth father. Nothing stood out as to why Irma would initiate this meeting otherwise. “Let’s meet up afterward. This is a lot to dump on a guy I just met.”
“I’m not some guy. I’m your Big Daddy. I can handle it.” Warner remained supportive.
“Thank you. To be honest, I’d feel better if you came too.” Taddy admitted her needs for the first time to a man. To her surprise, she didn’t feel as weak as she thought she would. She actually felt stronger.
“What time are you meeting her?”
“Ten.” Two hours until show time.
“Where does she live?”
“Central Park West.”
Warner nuzzled her nose and kissed her. “Let me make you breakfast and then we’ll head over. You need to eat. I’m afraid you’ll pass out if you don’t.”
“You can cook?”
He got out of bed bragging, “I make delicious eggs Benedict.”
Thank you, Jesus.
Chapter Twenty
A Daughter’s Goodbye
May 23
Upper East Side, New York City
Jose had driven alongside Seventy-Ninth Street through Central Park to her parents’ building while anxiety cooled Taddy’s thoughts. The Brillfords resided in the San Remo, a twenty-seven-story luxury high-rise, home to Manhattan’s elite. Staffed with servants and guards, the building was primed for celebrities who sought privacy in the Big Apple.
The summer Taddy’s bastard child rumors had circulated, she’d overheard San Remo’s doorman discussing Irma’s past affair. They’d mentioned she’d fallen in love with another man in the building. Notable residents at the time included Steven Spielberg, Bruce Willis and music band U2’s lead singer Bono. She’d created a birthfather list in her head but conceded that no one could replace her dad, Joseph Graf. Maybe he couldn’t love her as his own but she’d always loved him.
Taddy glanced out the Cadillac’s window, feeling Warner resting his face against the back of her neck.
“You okay?”
“I hope to be.” She turned to look at him and kissed his cheek. Then she sat forward to talk to her driver. “Jose, this is it.”
Jose pulled up front, parked the SUV and opened the door for her and Warner. “Good luck, Miss Brill.”
“Thank you. I’ll call when we’re leaving for you to come back around.” Drawing her sunglasses up into her hair, she noticed Warner staring at her. He was worried.
“Come here.” He hugged her and whispered in her ear, “I’ll help you through this, as much as you want me to.”
“I can lean on you?” she asked.
“Yes.”
“Any final advice before we go in?”
“Listen to what your mother has to say. Focus on what she says.”
“I intend to.”
“We can leave whenever you’re ready.” His arms cinched tight around her waist.
Having a guy with her for emotional support was new for her. It felt pretty damn good. Taddy hoped to get used to having Warner at her side. He gave the doorman their names, and he buzzed them up.
When the elevator doors opened, Taddy smelled a familiar cleansing agent the maids wiped the walls with. Built in the 1930s with mediocre ventilation, the staff used tea tree oil was used to keep the building fresh. She stared at the double doors for a minute. The sign read “26EFG”. The cooperative occupied three units. Half in eagerness, half in terror, she rang the bell. Her pulse throbbed as childhood memories came back to her.
Taddy did her best to drop the self-preserving defenses she’d used in the past so she could remain open to whatever her mother wanted to talk to her about. Standing in this building felt awkward but she had missed her home. How could they have let so much time elapse? Why had they done this? Maybe soon she’d have the answers she finally longed for. And maybe then the hole she’d felt in her heart would finally be filled.
When she rang the doorbell a second time, she could hear the chimes on the other side echoing through the penthouse. The door opened and, to her surprise, Mr. Constance wasn’t the one to greet them.
Countess Irma stood before her.
Irma must’ve been about five foot two. Her mother’s fingers fluttered around her collarbone as if she was uncertain whether she should offer a hug or a handshake. “Tabitha Adelaide…” She put her arms out for an embrace, as much as she could. Taddy felt it was cold and lacking, but it was a start.
Her mother wasn’t as she’d imagined. Irma barely resembled the woman Taddy remembered. Somehow she’d shrunk. Irma was flat-chested, her body frail and her face sunken. Her black eyes had hollowed, reflecting her emptiness.
Obviously, Irma didn’t subscribe to the cosmetic surgical maintenance procedures Birdie used to keep up. Sure, Irma wore designer clothes, certainly this season’s Escada. Her makeup was caked into a mask, a perfect illusion. Underneath her overpriced clothes and titanium dioxide face were many imperfections. Nothing a beauty day could fix or cover. Her pain felt palpable to Taddy.
Unsure what to call her, Taddy said, “Mom, this is Warner.”
A soft gasp escaped from Irma’s lips.
Taddy deflected any attention from herself. She wasn’t comfortable with her mother looking her up and down. Everything suddenly felt even more awkward.
Warner and her mother shook hands.
Irma escorted them into the front living room.
She wasn’t surprised to see the home was decorated much like a showroom. It was cold and sterile and didn’t reflect any warmth. Everything was just to impress those looking in from the outside. There were no pictures from her childhood. Nothing in the home spoke of family, not the kind she once knew. She wondered if they’d been happy before Irma’s affair began.
“Where’s Dad?”
 
; “Germany. Joseph’s speaking at a conference for work in Heidelberg.”
“Did you tell him you invited me here?”
“No.”
They sat in silence. Irma pushed a teapot forward. It was a china pattern that reflected a delicate gold tree branch. Taddy couldn’t take her eyes off it. She remembered the service set from her childhood. The bone china had yellowed in places it shouldn’t. Taddy hugged her Birkin bag, putting distance between them.
“You okay?” Warner whispered in her ear and wrapped a protective arm around her shoulders. She nodded.
Irma poured them each a cup. “I caught you on the news. You’ve grown into such a beauty, Tabitha Adelaide.”
“I’ll be thirty before I know it.”
“Where does Taddy’s middle name come from?” Warner asked.
“Her middle name came from a friend in the building. A Texas natural-gas heiress named Adelaide de Menil.”
“How is Miss de Menil?” Taddy asked. That woman had been a force in the photography world and had showed her and Lex how to take pictures.
“We stopped speaking years ago, when the Eastons left the building.”
Birdie and Eddie had moved downtown. Claiming they wanted to relive their youth, they’d bought a loft in Soho. With Eddie always on tour and Lex in boarding school, Birdie despised living in such a massive penthouse. She’d also stated, on numerous occasions, that she hated the Upper West Side snootiness.
“Makes sense.” Taddy shrugged. Her mother didn’t have many, if any, friends left to keep her company, except Muffie.
“Muffs always talks about your PR firm. Your aunt is so proud of you.”
Taddy figured her mother would start with small talk.
“I didn’t realize just how successful you’d become.”
“I enjoy it.”
“What types of clients do you represent?”
“Lipstick, footwear, handbags—fun stuff,” Taddy answered. She wondered how long they’d dance until the real questions and answers began.
Irma’s eyebrow rose as she studied her. “Makes sense. You were the only ten-year-old in town who wore haute couture.” For years Donna Karan, who also resided in the building, had taken a special interest in her and Lex. Donna invited the girls to her showroom to share her fashion designer passion. That was where Lex’s prowess came from, and her desire to have her own brand.
“Lex and you sure did enjoy dressing up when you were little. Always getting into something or another. I couldn’t keep you girls out of my wardrobe closet.”
“She says hello. Easton Essentials is doing great.”
“Yes, that’s what Birdie said when we spoke the other day.” Her beady eyes shifted to Warner.
Nervous, Taddy glanced down at the coffee table between them. Her eye caught yesterday’s Wall Street Journal piece featuring her and Warner. Sticking out from the newspaper was Today’s Business magazine. She knew the issue well. Taddy’s image was emblazoned across the cover.
The featured piece had given readers an inside glimpse of Taddy’s career as a single woman taking on the media world. Kiki had released her financial statements to the journalist in hopes that being a Fortune 500 company would make it possible to expand overseas.
Her mother reached across the table for her hand, but Taddy pulled away.
Uncomfortable with the snub, Warner brushed his left leg against hers. “Taddy—”
“It’s okay, Mr. Truman.” Her mother kept her focus on Taddy. “I also read about you in that magazine too. It’s a nice change from the last time you were in print, Tabitha Adelaide.”
“Mom—”
“It’s true.” Irma’s eyes widened.
“What do you mean, Countess?” Warner asked.
“Please call me Irma.” She gave him a thin-lipped smile. “The last time I read about Tabitha Adelaide in print she forgot to put any clothes on. She also ranted about what horrible parents we’d been and how the courts thought it best to have her taken away from us.”
Taddy chewed on her tongue for a second, remembering the pictorial. The photos taken may have been in poor taste, but she’d only been eighteen. She’d worn a heraldic crown while spreading her legs and managing a generous smile. Did her resentment this year for Neve Adele stem from her own visceral feeling about her choices? Were Neve and her one in the same?
She didn’t enjoy the exposure the way Neve did. “I needed money. With no skills, how else could I pay for college and live in Manhattan?” She’d been offered a quarter of a million dollars to pose nude, give the dirt on her former royal socialite Brillford life and announce the new Taddy Brill. The spread had launched her independence and landed her a contract for a lingerie line, which had doubled her pay. With a million in the bank before year’s end, she’d been able to bring her media firm alive.
Taddy and Lex had graduated from Avon Porter Academy, where they’d met Vive and Blake, made a friends-for-life-pact and enrolled in Columbia University. At first, Taddy wanted to go college in Los Angeles, as far from the East Coast as possible. However, her friends persuaded her to return to Manhattan. Penniless, Taddy had stayed with Vive. The Farnworths kept an apartment at the Sherry-Netherland.
Vive promised her that living east of Fifth Avenue while Taddy’s parents remained west would keep her mind Brillford-free. It hadn’t worked. In the years since they’d separated, she’d thought about her parents at least once every hour. In New York City, with its limited square footage, Taddy had found it odd that she’d never bumped into her parents at any social events. It’d seemed as if they’d fled the country.
Her mother offered no answer. Irma redirected her attention to Warner. “Are you planning to marry Tabitha Adelaide?”
“Our relationship is brand new,” Taddy interjected before Warner could respond.
He locked his arm in her to display their new commitment. “Marriage is a great plan for our future. She and I will talk about it when the right time comes along.”
Irma gave an approving nod as if she was in the position to do so.
She wasn’t.
Warner continued, “Irma. If you don’t mind, I’ll speak on my girlfriend’s behalf for a minute. Why did you request to see Taddy today?”
Here we go.
Irma sat back in her chair, her fingertips pressed together into a point as if about to confess her sins. Her gaze was intent on Taddy’s face when she replied, “I want you in my life. I also want to offer an apology. I am sorry, Tabitha Adelaide.” Her mother’s face softened, confident her words were enough.
They weren’t.
“Why today?”
“I’ve missed you.”
“Missed me?”
“I want us to be friends.” Irma could barely say the friend word, let alone offer any sincerity.
“After all these years, you want us to be close.” Curses ripped from her lips.
“Taddy, don’t.”
She ignored Warner and kept going. “Why do you want me back?”
Irma shifted in her chair. “I want to get a divorce and start over.”
“Okay, move out,” Taddy mocked, gazing around the apartment. Her mother could walk out the front door if she wanted.
“It’s not easy. If I leave Joseph, he’ll cut me off. I’ll walk away with nothing.”
“So…”
“How will I live?”
“Dad will give you something—”
“No. Joseph will make certain I’m penniless.”
“Ah-hmm.” Her mother’s reasoning suddenly came into focus. Taddy felt lost in her thoughts, drowning in the muck and mire that was Irma. Now Irma kept pushing at her. Floating alone on the verge of exhaustion, Taddy had nothing to hold on to.
Disappointed, she now understood the reason Irma had reached out to her. According to the magazine article, Taddy was wealthy. Irma’s recent words played in her head. “I didn’t realize just how successful you’d become.” Taddy was supposed to be her financial security. Her mot
ives were fueled by money. What else? Irma knew the cash rules. She’d married for it, birthed a child for it and lived by it. “You’re saying you want to leave Dad and have me take care of you?” She had to laugh, otherwise she’d cry.
“No, honey. That’s not it at all. I—I love you.”
Her mom had never said that to her before.
“What?” Taddy inhaled sharply through her nose.
“I said that isn’t it at all.”
“No, Mom, after that.” She closed her eyes and tried to think of nothing at all. That seemed logical. Taddy wanted to hear her mother say it again, just one more time. Please, Mom, just say it like you mean it, please.
Silence. There was nothing but Warner’s heavy breathing to be heard among them. He squeezed her hand tight for her to open her eyes and so she did.
“Sorry, Tabitha Adelaide. I don’t know what else I can say or do to make it up to you.” Her mother glared at her. Irma’s loss for words and frozen face confirmed Taddy’s suspicion. The thing that ticked Taddy off the most was that Irma didn’t have a clue as to how ruthless she sounded.
The chill between them grew.
Taddy let go of Warner and slipped her hands under her legs and sat on them, thanking her lucky stars Lex and Vive hadn’t come with her. If her best friends had heard Irma, Lex would’ve grabbed Irma’s freshwater-pearl-adorned neck and snapped her in half. Lex had one thing in common with Birdie, the girl loved to throw a good punch. And vile, terse words would’ve spewed from Vive.
Speechless, Warner sat in silence. Taddy doubted he’d be familiar with parental extortion. But from what he’d told her about his ex-fiancée, maybe he understood that some people put money first.
She wanted to maintain composure, but she needed to ask. She had to find out why. “Were you there when I needed you?”
“When you were a child, yes I was.”
“I was a child when you dropped me off.” Her words nearly choked her.
“Avon Porter kept you fed and educated,” her mother defended. “You were in the top private boarding school in the country! I wouldn’t call that neglected.”
A heaviness centered in her chest. Her mother would never see it Taddy’s way. Irma mothered in a different style, one where nannies breastfed someone else’s children. “You left me, Mother. You never came back.” Taddy promised herself she wouldn’t cry. But it was too late. The tears fell down her cheeks as she relived the pain.