Page 56 of The Way We Live Now


  CHAPTER LIV.

  THE INDIA OFFICE.

  The Conservative party at this particular period was putting itsshoulder to the wheel,--not to push the coach up any hill, butto prevent its being hurried along at a pace which was not onlydangerous, but manifestly destructive. The Conservative party now andthen does put its shoulder to the wheel, ostensibly with the greatnational object above named; but also actuated by a natural desire tokeep its own head well above water and be generally doing something,so that other parties may not suppose that it is moribund. There are,no doubt, members of it who really think that when some object hasbeen achieved,--when, for instance, a good old Tory has been squeezedinto Parliament for the borough of Porcorum, which for the last threeparliaments has been represented by a Liberal,--the coach has beenreally stopped. To them, in their delightful faith, there comes atthese triumphant moments a conviction that after all the people asa people have not been really in earnest in their efforts to takesomething from the greatness of the great, and to add something tothe lowliness of the lowly. The handle of the windlass has beenbroken, the wheel is turning fast the reverse way, and the ropeof Radical progress is running back. Who knows what may not beregained if the Conservative party will only put its shoulder to thewheel and take care that the handle of the windlass be not mended!Sticinthemud, which has ever been a doubtful little borough, hasjust been carried by a majority of fifteen! A long pull, a strongpull, and a pull altogether,--and the old day will come back again.Venerable patriarchs think of Lord Liverpool and other heroes, anddream dreams of Conservative bishops, Conservative lord-lieutenants,and of a Conservative ministry that shall remain in for a generation.

  Such a time was now present. Porcorum and Sticinthemud had done theirduty valiantly,--with much management. But Westminster! If thisspecial seat for Westminster could be carried, the country then couldhardly any longer have a doubt on the matter. If only Mr. Melmottecould be got in for Westminster, it would be manifest that the peoplewere sound at heart, and that all the great changes which had beeneffected during the last forty years,--from the first reform inParliament down to the Ballot,--had been managed by the cunning andtreachery of a few ambitious men. Not, however, that the Ballot wasjust now regarded by the party as an unmitigated evil, though itwas the last triumph of Radical wickedness. The Ballot was on thewhole popular with the party. A short time since, no doubt it wasregarded by the party as being one and the same as national ruin andnational disgrace. But it had answered well at Porcorum, and with duemanipulation had been found to be favourable at Sticinthemud. TheBallot might perhaps help the long pull and the strong pull,--and, inspite of the ruin and disgrace, was thought by some just now to be ahighly Conservative measure. It was considered that the Ballot mightassist Melmotte at Westminster very materially.

  Any one reading the Conservative papers of the time, and hearing theConservative speeches in the borough,--any one at least who lived soremote as not to have learned what these things really mean,--wouldhave thought that England's welfare depended on Melmotte's return.In the enthusiasm of the moment, the attacks made on his characterwere answered by eulogy as loud as the censure was bitter. The chiefcrime laid to his charge was connected with the ruin of some greatcontinental assurance company, as to which it was said that he hadso managed it as to leave it utterly stranded, with an enormousfortune of his own. It was declared that every shilling which he hadbrought to England with him had consisted of plunder stolen fromthe shareholders in the company. Now the "Evening Pulpit," in itsendeavour to make the facts of this transaction known, had placedwhat it called the domicile of this company in Paris, whereas it wasascertained that its official head-quarters had in truth been placedat Vienna. Was not such a blunder as this sufficient to show that nomerchant of higher honour than Mr. Melmotte had ever adorned theExchanges of modern capitals? And then two different newspapers ofthe time, both of them antagonistic to Melmotte, failed to be inaccord on a material point. One declared that Mr. Melmotte was not intruth possessed of any wealth. The other said that he had derived hiswealth from those unfortunate shareholders. Could anything betrayso bad a cause as contradictions such as these? Could anythingbe so false, so weak, so malignant, so useless, so wicked, soself-condemned,--in fact, so "Liberal" as a course of action suchas this? The belief naturally to be deduced from such statements,nay, the unavoidable conviction on the minds--of, at any rate, theConservative newspapers--was that Mr. Melmotte had accumulated animmense fortune, and that he had never robbed any shareholder of ashilling.

  The friends of Melmotte had moreover a basis of hope, and wereenabled to sound premonitory notes of triumph, arising from causesquite external to their party. The "Breakfast Table" supportedMelmotte, but the "Breakfast Table" was not a Conservative organ.This support was given, not to the great man's political opinions, asto which a well-known writer in that paper suggested that the greatman had probably not as yet given very much attention to the partyquestions which divided the country,--but to his commercial position.It was generally acknowledged that few men living,--perhaps no manalive,--had so acute an insight into the great commercial questionsof the age as Mr. Augustus Melmotte. In whatever part of the world hemight have acquired his commercial experience,--for it had been saidrepeatedly that Melmotte was not an Englishman,--he now made Londonhis home and Great Britain his country, and it would be for thewelfare of the country that such a man should sit in the BritishParliament. Such were the arguments used by the "Breakfast Table" insupporting Mr. Melmotte. This was, of course, an assistance;--and notthe less so because it was asserted in other papers that the countrywould be absolutely disgraced by his presence in Parliament. Thehotter the opposition the keener will be the support. Honest goodmen, men who really loved their country, fine gentlemen, who hadreceived unsullied names from great ancestors, shed their money rightand left, and grew hot in personally energetic struggles to have thisman returned to Parliament as the head of the great Conservativemercantile interests of Great Britain!

  There was one man who thoroughly believed that the thing at thepresent moment most essentially necessary to England's glory was thereturn of Mr. Melmotte for Westminster. This man was undoubtedly avery ignorant man. He knew nothing of any one political questionwhich had vexed England for the last half century,--nothing whateverof the political history which had made England what it was at thebeginning of that half century. Of such names as Hampden, Somers, andPitt he had hardly ever heard. He had probably never read a book inhis life. He knew nothing of the working of parliament, nothing ofnationality,--had no preference whatever for one form of governmentover another, never having given his mind a moment's trouble onthe subject. He had not even reflected how a despotic monarch ora federal republic might affect himself, and possibly did notcomprehend the meaning of those terms. But yet he was fully confidentthat England did demand and ought to demand that Mr. Melmotte shouldbe returned for Westminster. This man was Mr. Melmotte himself.

  In this conjunction of his affairs Mr. Melmotte certainly lost hishead. He had audacity almost sufficient for the very dangerous gamewhich he was playing; but, as crisis heaped itself upon crisis, hebecame deficient in prudence. He did not hesitate to speak of himselfas the man who ought to represent Westminster, and of those whoopposed him as little malignant beings who had mean interests oftheir own to serve. He went about in his open carriage, with LordAlfred at his left hand, with a look on his face which seemed toimply that Westminster was not good enough for him. He even hintedto certain political friends that at the next general election heshould try the City. Six months since he had been a humble man to aLord,--but now he scolded Earls and snubbed Dukes, and yet did it ina manner which showed how proud he was of connecting himself withtheir social pre-eminence, and how ignorant of the manner in whichsuch pre-eminence affects English gentlemen generally. The morearrogant he became the more vulgar he was, till even Lord Alfredwould almost be tempted to rush away to impecuniosity and freedom.Perhaps there were some with whom this conduct had a salutary effe
ct.No doubt arrogance will produce submission; and there are men whotake other men at the price those other men put upon themselves. Suchpersons could not refrain from thinking Melmotte to be mighty becausehe swaggered; and gave their hinder parts to be kicked merely becausehe put up his toe. We all know men of this calibre,--and how theyseem to grow in number. But the net result of his personal demeanourwas injurious; and it was debated among some of the warmest of hissupporters whether a hint should not be given him. "Couldn't LordAlfred say a word to him?" said the Honourable Beauchamp Beauclerk,who, himself in Parliament, a leading man in his party, thoroughlywell acquainted with the borough, wealthy and connected by blood withhalf the great Conservative families in the kingdom, had been movingheaven and earth on behalf of the great financial king, and workinglike a slave for his success.

  "Alfred's more than half afraid of him," said Lionel Lupton, a youngaristocrat, also in Parliament, who had been inoculated with theidea that the interests of the party demanded Melmotte in Parliament,but who would have given up his Scotch shooting rather than haveundergone Melmotte's company for a day.

  "Something really must be done, Mr. Beauclerk," said Mr. Jones, whowas the leading member of a very wealthy firm of builders in theborough, who had become a Conservative politician, who had thoughtsof the House for himself, but who never forgot his own position. "Heis making a great many personal enemies."

  "He's the finest old turkey cock out," said Lionel Lupton.

  Then it was decided that Mr. Beauclerk should speak a word to LordAlfred. The rich man and the poor man were cousins, and had alwaysbeen intimate. "Alfred," said the chosen mentor at the club oneafternoon, "I wonder whether you couldn't say something to Melmotteabout his manner." Lord Alfred turned sharp round and looked into hiscompanion's face. "They tell me he is giving offence. Of course hedoesn't mean it. Couldn't he draw it a little milder?"

  Lord Alfred made his reply almost in a whisper. "If you ask me, Idon't think he could. If you got him down and trampled on him, youmight make him mild. I don't think there's any other way."

  "You couldn't speak to him, then?"

  "Not unless I did it with a horsewhip."

  This, coming from Lord Alfred, who was absolutely dependent on theman, was very strong. Lord Alfred had been much afflicted thatmorning. He had spent some hours with his friend, either going aboutthe borough in the open carriage, or standing just behind him atmeetings, or sitting close to him in committee-rooms,--and had beennauseated with Melmotte. When spoken to about his friend he could notrestrain himself. Lord Alfred had been born and bred a gentleman, andfound the position in which he was now earning his bread to be almostinsupportable. It had gone against the grain with him at first, whenhe was called Alfred; but now that he was told "just to open thedoor," and "just to give that message," he almost meditated revenge.Lord Nidderdale, who was quick at observation, had seen something ofthis in Grosvenor Square, and declared that Lord Alfred had investedpart of his recent savings in a cutting whip. Mr. Beauclerk, when hehad got his answer, whistled and withdrew. But he was true to hisparty. Melmotte was not the first vulgar man whom the Conservativeshad taken by the hand, and patted on the back, and told that he was agod.

  The Emperor of China was now in England, and was to be entertainedone night at the India Office. The Secretary of State for the secondgreat Asiatic Empire was to entertain the ruler of the first. Thiswas on Saturday the 6th of July, and Melmotte's dinner was to takeplace on the following Monday. Very great interest was made by theLondon world generally to obtain admission to the India Office,--themaking of such interest consisting in the most abject begging fortickets of admission, addressed to the Secretary of State, to allthe under secretaries, to assistant secretaries, secretaries ofdepartments, chief clerks, and to head-messengers and their wives.If a petitioner could not be admitted as a guest into the splendourof the reception rooms, might not he,--or she,--be allowed to standin some passage whence the Emperor's back might perhaps be seen,--sothat, if possible, the petitioner's name might be printed in thelist of guests which would be published on the next morning? Now Mr.Melmotte with his family was, of course, supplied with tickets. He,who was to spend a fortune in giving the Emperor a dinner, was ofcourse entitled to be present at other places to which the Emperorwould be brought to be shown. Melmotte had already seen the Emperorat a breakfast in Windsor Park, and at a ball in royal halls. Buthitherto he had not been presented to the Emperor. Presentations haveto be restricted,--if only on the score of time; and it had beenthought that as Mr. Melmotte would of course have some communicationwith the hardworked Emperor at his own house, that would suffice. Buthe had felt himself to be ill-used and was offended. He spoke withbitterness to some of his supporters of the Royal Family generally,because he had not been brought to the front rank either at thebreakfast or at the ball,--and now, at the India Office, wasdetermined to have his due. But he was not on the list of those whomthe Secretary of State intended on this occasion to present to theBrother of the Sun.

  He had dined freely. At this period of his career he had taken todining freely,--which was in itself imprudent, as he had need at allhours of his best intelligence. Let it not be understood that hewas tipsy. He was a man whom wine did not often affect after thatfashion. But it made him, who was arrogant before, tower in hisarrogance till he was almost sure to totter. It was probably at somemoment after dinner that Lord Alfred decided upon buying the cuttingwhip of which he had spoken. Melmotte went with his wife and daughterto the India Office, and soon left them far in the background with arequest,--we may say an order,--to Lord Alfred to take care of them.It may be observed here that Marie Melmotte was almost as great acuriosity as the Emperor himself, and was much noticed as the girlwho had attempted to run away to New York, but had gone without herlover. Melmotte entertained some foolish idea that as the IndiaOffice was in Westminster, he had a peculiar right to demand anintroduction on this occasion because of his candidature. He didsucceed in getting hold of an unfortunate under secretary of state, astudious and invaluable young peer, known as Earl De Griffin. He wasa shy man, of enormous wealth, of mediocre intellect, and no greatphysical ability, who never amused himself; but worked hard night andday, and read everything that anybody could write, and more than anyother person could read, about India. Had Mr. Melmotte wanted to knowthe exact dietary of the peasants in Orissa, or the revenue of thePunjaub, or the amount of crime in Bombay, Lord De Griffin would haveinformed him without a pause. But in this matter of managing theEmperor, the under secretary had nothing to do, and would have beenthe last man to be engaged in such a service. He was, however, secondin command at the India Office, and of his official rank Melmotte wasunfortunately made aware. "My Lord," said he, by no means hidinghis demand in a whisper, "I am desirous of being presented to hisImperial Majesty." Lord De Griffin looked at him in despair, notknowing the great man,--being one of the few men in that room who didnot know him.

  "This is Mr. Melmotte," said Lord Alfred, who had deserted the ladiesand still stuck to his master. "Lord De Griffin, let me introduce youto Mr. Melmotte."

  "Oh--oh--oh," said Lord De Griffin, just putting out his hand. "I amdelighted;--ah, yes," and pretending to see somebody, he made a weakand quite ineffectual attempt to escape.

  Melmotte stood directly in his way, and with unabashed audacityrepeated his demand. "I am desirous of being presented to hisImperial Majesty. Will you do me the honour of making my requestknown to Mr. Wilson?" Mr. Wilson was the Secretary of State, who wasas busy as a Secretary of State is sure to be on such an occasion.

  "I hardly know," said Lord De Griffin. "I'm afraid it's all arranged.I don't know anything about it myself."

  "You can introduce me to Mr. Wilson."

  "He's up there, Mr. Melmotte; and I couldn't get at him. Really youmust excuse me. I'm very sorry. If I see him I'll tell him." And thepoor under secretary again endeavoured to escape.

  Mr. Melmotte put up his hand and stopped him. "I'm not going to standthis kind of thing," he said. The o
ld Marquis of Auld Reekie wasclose at hand, the father of Lord Nidderdale, and therefore theproposed father-in-law of Melmotte's daughter, and he poked histhumb heavily into Lord Alfred's ribs. "It is generally understood,I believe," continued Melmotte, "that the Emperor is to do me thehonour of dining at my poor house on Monday. He don't dine thereunless I'm made acquainted with him before he comes. I mean whatI say. I ain't going to entertain even an Emperor unless I'm goodenough to be presented to him. Perhaps you'd better let Mr. Wilsonknow, as a good many people intend to come."

  "Here's a row," said the old Marquis. "I wish he'd be as good as hisword."

  "He has taken a little wine," whispered Lord Alfred. "Melmotte," hesaid, still whispering; "upon my word it isn't the thing. They'reonly Indian chaps and Eastern swells who are presented here,--not afellow among 'em all who hasn't been in India or China, or isn't aSecretary of State, or something of that kind."

  "Then they should have done it at Windsor, or at the ball," saidMelmotte, pulling down his waistcoat. "By George, Alfred! I'm inearnest, and somebody had better look to it. If I'm not presented tohis Imperial Majesty to-night, by G----, there shall be no dinnerin Grosvenor Square on Monday. I'm master enough of my own house, Isuppose, to be able to manage that."

  Here was a row, as the Marquis had said! Lord De Griffin wasfrightened, and Lord Alfred felt that something ought to be done."There's no knowing how far the pig-headed brute may go in hisobstinacy," Lord Alfred said to Mr. Lupton, who was there. It nodoubt might have been wise to have allowed the merchant prince toreturn home with the resolution that his dinner should be abandoned.He would have repented probably before the next morning; and hadhe continued obdurate it would not have been difficult to explainto Celestial Majesty that something preferable had been found forthat particular evening even to a banquet at the house of Britishcommerce. The Government would probably have gained the seat forWestminster, as Melmotte would at once have become very unpopularwith the great body of his supporters. But Lord De Griffin was notthe man to see this. He did make his way up to Mr. Wilson, andexplained to the Amphytrion of the night the demand which was madeon his hospitality. A thoroughly well-established and experiencedpolitical Minister of State always feels that if he can make a friendor appease an enemy without paying a heavy price he will be doing agood stroke of business. "Bring him up," said Mr. Wilson. "He's goingto do something out in the East, isn't he?" "Nothing in India," saidLord De Griffin. "The submarine telegraph is quite impossible." Mr.Wilson, instructing some satellite to find out in what way he mightproperly connect Mr. Melmotte with China, sent Lord De Griffin awaywith his commission.

  "My dear Alfred, just allow me to manage these things myself," Mr.Melmotte was saying when the under secretary returned. "I know my ownposition and how to keep it. There shall be no dinner. I'll be d----if any of the lot shall dine in Grosvenor Square on Monday." LordAlfred was so astounded that he was thinking of making his way tothe Prime Minister, a man whom he abhorred and didn't know, and ofacquainting him with the terrible calamity which was threatened. Butthe arrival of the under secretary saved him the trouble.

  "If you will come with me," whispered Lord De Griffin, "it shall bemanaged. It isn't just the thing, but as you wish it, it shall bedone."

  "I do wish it," said Melmotte aloud. He was one of those men whomsuccess never mollified, whose enjoyment of a point gained alwaysdemanded some hoarse note of triumph from his own trumpet.

  "If you will be so kind as to follow me," said Lord De Griffin. Andso the thing was done. Melmotte, as he was taken up to the imperialfootstool, was resolved upon making a little speech, forgetful atthe moment of interpreters,--of the double interpreters whom theMajesty of China required; but the awful, quiescent solemnity of thecelestial one quelled even him, and he shuffled by without saying aword even of his own banquet.

  But he had gained his point, and, as he was taken home to poor Mr.Longestaffe's house in Bruton Street, was intolerable. Lord Alfredtried to escape after putting Madame Melmotte and her daughter intothe carriage, but Melmotte insisted on his presence. "You might aswell come, Alfred;--there are two or three things I must settlebefore I go to bed."

  "I'm about knocked up," said the unfortunate man.

  "Knocked up, nonsense! Think what I've been through. I've been allday at the hardest work a man can do." Had he as usual got in first,leaving his man-of-all-work to follow, the man-of-all-work wouldhave escaped. Melmotte, fearing such defection, put his hand on LordAlfred's shoulder, and the poor fellow was beaten. As they were takenhome a continual sound of cock-crowing was audible, but as the wordswere not distinguished they required no painful attention; but whenthe soda water and brandy and cigars made their appearance in Mr.Longestaffe's own back room, then the trumpet was sounded with a fullblast. "I mean to let the fellows know what's what," said Melmotte,walking about the room. Lord Alfred had thrown himself into anarm-chair, and was consoling himself as best he might with tobacco."Give and take is a very good motto. If I scratch their back, Imean them to scratch mine. They won't find many people to spend tenthousand pounds in entertaining a guest of the country's as a privateenterprise. I don't know of any other man of business who coulddo it, or would do it. It's not much any of them can do for me.Thank God, I don't want 'em. But if consideration is to be shownto anybody, I intend to be considered. The Prince treated me veryscurvily, Alfred, and I shall take an opportunity of telling himso on Monday. I suppose a man may be allowed to speak to his ownguests."

  "You might turn the election against you if you said anything thePrince didn't like."

  "D---- the election, sir. I stand before the electors of Westminsteras a man of business, not as a courtier,--as a man who understandscommercial enterprise, not as one of the Prince's toadies. Some ofyou fellows in England don't realise the matter yet; but I can tellyou that I think myself quite as great a man as any Prince." LordAlfred looked at him, with strong reminiscences of the old ducalhome, and shuddered. "I'll teach them a lesson before long. Didn't Iteach 'em a lesson to-night,--eh? They tell me that Lord De Griffinhas sixty thousand a-year to spend. What's sixty thousand a year?Didn't I make him go on my business? And didn't I make 'em do as Ichose? You want to tell me this and that, but I can tell you that Iknow more of men and women than some of you fellows do, who think youknow a great deal."

  This went on through the whole of a long cigar; and afterwards,as Lord Alfred slowly paced his way back to his lodgings in MountStreet, he thought deeply whether there might not be means ofescaping from his present servitude. "Beast! Brute! Pig!" he said tohimself over and over again as he slowly went to Mount Street.