POZZO: The Net. He thinks he’s entangled in a net.

  VLADIMIR: [Squirming like an aesthete.] There’s something about it …

  [LUCKY makes to return to his burdens.]

  POZZO: Woaa!

  [LUCKY stiffens.]

  ESTRAGON: Tell us about the time he refused.

  POZZO: With pleasure, with pleasure. [He fumbles in his pockets.] Wait. [He fumbles.] What have I done with my spray? [He fumbles.] Well now isn’t that … [He looks up, consternation on his features. Faintly.] I can’t find my pulverizer!

  ESTRAGON [Faintly.] My left lung is very weak! [He coughs feebly. In ringing tones.] But my right lung is as sound as a bell!

  POZZO: [Normal voice.] No matter! What was I saying. [He ponders.] Wait. [Ponders.] Well now isn’t that … [He raises his head.] Help me!

  ESTRAGON: Wait!

  VLADIMIR: Wait!

  POZZO: Wait!

  [All three take off their hats simultaneously, press their hands to their foreheads, concentrate.]

  ESTRAGON: [Triumphantly.] Ah!

  VLADIMIR: He has it.

  POZZO: [Impatient.] Well?

  ESTRAGON: Why doesn’t he put down his bags?

  VLADIMIR: Rubbish!

  POZZO: Are you sure?

  VLADIMIR: Damn it, haven’t you already told us!

  POZZO: I’ve already told you?

  ESTRAGON: He’s already told us?

  VLADIMIR: Anyway he has put them down.

  ESTRAGON: [Glance at LUCKY.] So he has. And what of it?

  VLADIMIR: Since he has put down his bags it is impossible we should have asked why he does not do so.

  POZZO: Stoutly reasoned!

  ESTRAGON: And why has he put them down?

  POZZO: Answer us that.

  VLADIMIR: In order to dance.

  ESTRAGON: True!

  POZZO: True!

  [Silence. They put on their hats.]

  ESTRAGON: Nothing happens, nobody comes, nobody goes, it’s awful!

  VLADIMIR: [To POZZO.] Tell him to think.

  POZZO: Give him his hat.

  VLADIMIR: His hat?

  POZZO: He can’t think without his hat.

  VLADIMIR: [To ESTRAGON.] Give him his hat.

  ESTRAGON: Me! After what he did to me! Never!

  VLADIMIR: I’ll give it to him.

  [He does not move.]

  ESTRAGON: [To pozzo.] Tell him to go and fetch it.

  POZZO: It’s better to give it to him.

  VLADIMIR: I’ll give it to him.

  [He picks up the hat and tenders it at arm’s length to LUCKY, who does not move.]

  POZZO: You must put it on his head.

  ESTRAGON: [To POZZO.] Tell him to take it.

  POZZO: It’s better to put it on his head.

  VLADIMIR: I’ll put it on his head.

  [He goes round behind LUCKY, approaches him cautiously, puts the hat on his head and recoils smartly. LUCKY does not move. Silence.]

  ESTRAGON: What’s he waiting for?

  POZZO: Stand back! [VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON move away from LUCKY, POZZO jerks the rope, LUCKY looks at POZZO.] Think, pig! [Pause, LUCKY begins to dance.] Stop! [LUCKY stops.] Forward! [LUCKY advances.] Stop! [LUCKY stops.] Think!

  [Silence.]

  LUCKY: On the other hand with regard to –

  POZZO: Stop! [LUCKY stops.] Back! [LUCKY moves back.] Stop! [LUCKY stops.] Turn! [LUCKY turns towards auditorium.] Think!

  [During LUCKY’s tirade the others react as follows: (1) VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON all attention, POZZO dejected and disgusted. (2) VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON begin to protest, POZZO’s sufferings increase. (3) VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON attentive again, POZZO more and more agitated and groaning. (4) VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON protest violently. POZZO jumps up, pulls on the rope. General outcry. LUCKY pulls on the rope, staggers, shouts his text. All three throw themselves on LUCKY who struggles and shouts his text.]

  LUCKY: Given the existence as uttered forth in the public works of Puncher and Wattmann of a personal God quaquaquaqua with white beard quaquaquaqua outside time without extension who from the heights of divine apathia divine athambia divine aphasia loves us dearly with some exceptions for reasons unknown but time will tell and suffers like the divine Miranda with those who for reasons unknown but time will tell are plunged in torment plunged in fire whose fire flames if that continues and who can doubt it will fire the firmament that is to say blast hell to heaven so blue still and calm so calm with a calm which even though intermittent is better than nothing but not so fast and considering what is more that as a result of the labours left unfinished crowned by the Acacacacademy of Anthropopopometry of Essy-in-Possy of Testew and Cunard it is established beyond all doubt all other doubt than that which clings to the labours of men that as a result of the labours unfinished of Testew and Cunard it is established as hereinafter but not so fast for reasons unknown that as a result of the public works of Puncher and Wattmann it is established beyond all doubt that in view of the labours of Fartov and Belcher left unfinished for reasons unknown of Testew and Cunard left unfinished it is established what many deny that man in Possy of Testew and Cunard that man in Essy that man in short that man in brief in spite of the strides of alimentation and defecation is seen to waste and pine waste and pine and concurrently simultaneously what is more for reasons unknown in spite of the strides of physical culture the practice of sports such as tennis football running cycling swimming flying floating riding gliding conating camogie skating tennis of all kinds dying flying sports of all sorts autumn summer winter winter tennis of all kinds hockey of all sorts penicillin and succedanea in a word I resume and concurrently simultaneously for reasons unknown to shrink and dwindle in spite of the tennis I resume flying gliding golf over nine and eighteen holes tennis of all sorts in a word for reasons unknown in Feckham Peckham Fulham Clapham namely concurrently simultaneously what is more for reasons unknown but time will tell to shrink and dwindle I resume Fulham Clapham in a word the dead loss per caput since the death of Bishop Berkeley being to the tune of one inch four ounce per caput approximately by and large more or less to the nearest decimal good measure round figures stark naked in the stockinged feet in Connemara in a word for reasons unknown no matter what matter the facts are there and considering what is more much more grave that in the light of the labours lost of Steinweg and Peterman it appears what is more much more grave that in the light the light the light of the labours lost of Steinweg and Peterman that in the plains in the mountains by the seas by the rivers running water running fire the air is the same and then the earth namely the air and then the earth in the great cold the great dark the air and the earth abode of stones in the great cold alas alas in the year of their Lord six hundred and something the air the earth the sea the earth abode of stones in the great deeps the great cold on sea on land and in the air I resume for reasons unknown in spite of the tennis the facts are there but time will tell I resume alas alas on on in short in fine on on abode of stones who can doubt it I resume but not so fast I resume the skull to shrink and waste and concurrently simultaneously what is more for reasons unknown in spite of the tennis on on the beard the flames the tears the stones so blue so calm alas alas on on the skull the skull the skull the skull in Connemara in spite of the tennis the labours abandoned left unfinished graver still abode of stones in a word I resume alas alas abandoned unfinished the skull the skull in Connemara in spite of the tennis the skull alas the stones Cunard [Mêlée, final vociferations] tennis … the stones … so calm … Cunard … unfinished …

  POZZO: His hat!

  [VLADIMIR seizes LUCKY’s hat. Silence of LUCKY. He falls. Silence. Panting of the victors.]

  ESTRAGON: Avenged!

  [VLADIMIR examines the hat, peers inside it.]

  POZZO: Give me that! [He snatches the hat from VLADIMIR, throws it on the ground, tramples on it.] There’s an end to his thinking!

  VLADIMIR: But will he be able to walk?

  POZZO: Walk or crawl! [He kicks LUCKY.] Up pig!
br />   ESTRAGON: Perhaps he’s dead.

  VLADIMIR: You’ll kill him.

  POZZO: Up scum! [He jerks the rope.] Help me!

  VLADIMIR: How?

  POZZO: Raise him up!

  [VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON hoist LUCKY to his feet, support him an instant, then let him go. He falls.]

  ESTRAGON: He’s doing it on purpose!

  POZZO: You must hold him. [Pause.] Come on, come on, raise him up!

  ESTRAGON: To hell with him!

  VLADIMIR: Come on, once more.

  ESTRAGON: What does he take us for?

  [They raise LUCKY, hold him up.]

  POZZO: Don’t let him go! [VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON totter.] Don’t move! [POZZO fetches bag and basket and brings them towards LUCKY.] Hold him tight! [He puts the bag in LUCKY’s hand. LUCKY drops it immediately.] Don’t let him go! [He puts back the bag in LUCKY’s hand. Gradually, at the feel of the bag, LUCKY recovers his senses and his fingers close round the handle.] Hold him tight! [As before with basket.] Now! You can let him go. [VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON move away from LUCKY, who totters, reels, sags, but succeeds in remaining on his feet, bag and basket in his hands. POZZO steps back, cracks his whip.] Forward! [LUCKY totters forward.] Back! [LUCKY totters back.] Turn! [LUCKY turns.] Done it! He can walk. [Turning towards VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON.] Thank you gentlemen, and let me … [He fumbles in his pockets] … let me wish you … [Fumbles] … wish you … [Fumbles] … what have I done with my watch? [Fumbles.] A genuine half-hunter, gentlemen, with deadbeat escapement! [Sobbing.] ’Twas my granpa gave it to me! [He searches on the ground, VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON likewise. POZZO turns over with his foot the remains of LUCKY’s hat.] Well now, isn’t that just –

  VLADIMIR: Perhaps it’s in your fob.

  POZZO: Wait! [He doubles up in an attempt to apply his ear to his stomach, listens. Silence.] I hear nothing. [He beckons them to approach. VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON go towards him, bend over his stomach.] Surely one should hear the tick-tick.

  VLADIMIR: Silence!

  [All listen, bent double.]

  ESTRAGON: I hear something.

  POZZO: Where?

  VLADIMIR: It’s the heart.

  POZZO: [Disappointed.] Damnation!

  VLADIMIR: Silence!

  ESTRAGON: Perhaps it has stopped.

  [They straighten up.]

  POZZO: Which of you smells so bad?

  ESTRAGON: He has stinking breath and I have stinking feet.

  POZZO: I must go.

  ESTRAGON: And your half-hunter?

  POZZO: I must have left it at the manor.

  [Silence.]

  ESTRAGON: Then adieu.

  POZZO: Adieu.

  VLADIMIR: Adieu.

  POZZO: Adieu.

  [Silence. No one moves.]

  VLADIMIR: Adieu.

  POZZO: Adieu.

  ESTRAGON: Adieu.

  [Silence.]

  POZZO: And thank you.

  VLADIMIR: Thank you.

  POZZO: Not at all.

  ESTRAGON: Yes yes.

  POZZO: No no.

  VLADIMIR: Yes yes.

  ESTRAGON: No no.

  [Silence.]

  POZZO: I don’t seem to be able … [Long hesitation] … to depart.

  ESTRAGON: Such is life.

  [POZZO turns, moves away from LUCKY towards the wings, paying out the rope as he goes.]

  VLADIMIR: You’re going the wrong way.

  POZZO: I need a running start. [Having come to the end of the rope, i.e. off stage, he stops, turns, and cries.] Stand back! [VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON stand back, look towards POZZO. Crack of whip.] On! On!

  ESTRAGON: On!

  VLADIMIR: On!

  [LUCKY moves off.]

  POZZO: Faster! [He appears, crosses the stage preceded by LUCKY. VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON wave their hats. Exit LUCKY.] On! On! [On the point of disappearing in his turn he stops and turns. The rope tautens. Noise of LUCKY falling off.] Stool! [VLADIMIR fetches stool and gives it to POZZO, who throws it to LUCKY.] Adieu!

  POZZO: Up! Pig! [Noise of LUCKY getting up.] On! [Exit POZZO.] Faster! On! Adieu! Pig! Yip! Adieu!

  [Long silence.]

  VLADIMIR: That passed the time.

  ESTRAGON: It would have passed in any case.

  VLADIMIR: Yes, but not so rapidly.

  [Pause.]

  ESTRAGON: What do we do now?

  VLADIMIR: I don’t know.

  ESTRAGON: Let’s go.

  VLADIMIR: We can’t.

  ESTRAGON: Why not?

  VLADIMIR: We’re waiting for Godot.

  ESTRAGON: [Despairingly.] Ah!

  [Pause.]

  VLADIMIR: How they’ve changed!

  ESTRAGON: Who?

  VLADIMIR: Those two.

  ESTRAGON: That’s the idea, let’s make a little conversation.

  VLADIMIR: Haven’t they?

  ESTRAGON: What?

  VLADIMIR: Changed.

  ESTRAGON: Very likely. They all change. Only we can’t.

  VLADIMIR: Likely! It’s certain. Didn’t you see them?

  ESTRAGON: I suppose I did. But I don’t know them.

  VLADIMIR: Yes you do know them.

  ESTRAGON: No I don’t know them.

  VLADIMIR: We know them, I tell you. You forget everything. [Pause. To himself.] Unless they’re not the same …

  ESTRAGON: Why didn’t they recognize us then?

  VLADIMIR: That means nothing. I too pretended not to recognize them. And then nobody ever recognizes us.

  ESTRAGON: Forget it. What we need – Ow! [VLADIMIR does not react.] Ow!

  VLADIMIR: [To himself.] Unless they’re not the same …

  ESTRAGON: Didi! It’s the other foot!

  [He goes hobbling towards the mound.]

  VLADIMIR: Unless they’re not the same …

  BOY: [Off.] Mister!

  [ESTRAGON halts. Both look towards the voice.]

  ESTRAGON: Off we go again.

  VLADIMIR: Approach, my child.

  [Enter BOY, timidly. He halts.]

  BOY: Mister Albert …?

  VLADIMIR: Yes.

  ESTRAGON: What do you want?

  VLADIMIR: Approach.

  [The BOY does not move.]

  ESTRAGON: [Forcibly.] Approach when you’re told, can’t you?

  [The BOY advances timidly, halts.]

  VLADIMIR: What is it?

  BOY: Mr Godot …

  VLADIMIR: Obviously … [Pause.] Approach.

  ESTRAGON: [Violently.] Will you approach! [The BOY advances timidly.] What kept you so late?

  VLADIMIR: You have a message from Mr Godot?

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  VLADIMIR: Well, what is it?

  ESTRAGON: What kept you so late?

  [The BOY looks at them in turn, not knowing to which he should reply.]

  VLADIMIR: [To ESTRAGON.] Let him alone.

  ESTRAGON: [Violently.] You let me alone! [Advancing, to the BOY.] Do you know what time it is?

  BOY: [Recoiling.] It’s not my fault, sir.

  ESTRAGON: And whose is it? Mine?

  BOY: I was afraid, sir.

  ESTRAGON: Afraid of what? Of us? [Pause.] Answer me!

  VLADIMIR: I know what it is, he was afraid of the others.

  ESTRAGON: How long have you been here?

  BOY: A good while, sir.

  VLADIMIR: You were afraid of the whip.

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  VLADIMIR: The roars.

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  VLADIMIR: The two big men.

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  VLADIMIR: Do you know them?

  BOY: No, sir.

  VLADIMIR: Are you a native of these parts? [Silence.] Do you belong to these parts?

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  ESTRAGON: That’s all a pack of lies. [Shaking the BOY by the arm.] Tell us the truth.

  BOY: [Trembling.] But it is the truth, sir!

  VLADIMIR: Will you let him alone! What’s the matter with you? [ESTRAGON releases the BOY, moves awa
y, covering his face with his hands. VLADIMIR and the BOY observe him. ESTRAGON drops his hands. His face is convulsed.] What’s the matter with you?

  ESTRAGON: I’m unhappy.

  VLADIMIR: Not really! Since when?

  ESTRAGON: I’d forgotten.

  VLADIMIR: Extraordinary the tricks that memory plays! [ESTRAGON tries to speak, renounces, limps to his place, sits down and begins to take off his boots. To BOY.] Well?

  BOY: Mr Godot –

  VLADIMIR: I’ve seen you before, haven’t I?

  BOY: I don’t know sir.

  VLADIMIR: You don’t know me?

  BOY: No, sir.

  VLADIMIR: It wasn’t you came yesterday?

  BOY: No, sir.

  VLADIMIR: This is your first time?

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  [Silence.]

  VLADIMIR: Words, words. [Pause.] Speak.

  BOY: [In a rush.] Mr Godot told me to tell you he won’t come this evening but surely tomorrow.

  [Silence.]

  VLADIMIR: Is that all?

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  [Silence.]

  VLADIMIR: You work for Mr Godot?

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  VLADIMIR: What do you do?

  BOY: I mind the goats, sir.

  VLADIMIR: Is he good to you?

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  VLADIMIR: He doesn’t beat you?

  BOY: No, sir, not me.

  VLADIMIR: Whom does he beat?

  BOY: He beats my brother, sir.

  VLADIMIR: Ah, you have a brother?

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  VLADIMIR: What does he do?

  BOY: He minds the sheep, sir.

  VLADIMIR: And why doesn’t he beat you?

  BOY: I don’t know, sir.

  VLADIMIR: He must be fond of you.

  BOY: I don’t know, sir.

  [Silence.]

  VLADIMIR: Does he give you enough to eat? [The BOY hesitates.] Does he feed you well?

  BOY: Fairly well, sir.

  VLADIMIR: You’re not unhappy: [The BOY hesitates.] Do you hear me?

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  VLADIMIR: Well?

  BOY: I don’t know, sir.

  VLADIMIR: You don’t know if you’re unhappy or not?

  BOY: No, sir.

  VLADIMIR: You’re as bad as myself. [Silence.] Where do you sleep?

  BOY: In the loft, sir.

  VLADIMIR: With your brother?

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  VLADIMIR: In the hay?

  BOY: Yes, sir.

  [Silence.]

  VLADIMIR: All right, you may go.

  BOY: What am I to say to Mr Godot, sir?