“I think that is a great idea, get out of the house but don't be alone for long we have no idea what John has up his sleeves right now.” She smiled weakly and looked at my father. “We need to discuss how we are going to do this. Obviously you have to go home some time your wife is going to start worrying. However, in light of the new issues at hand I do not think it would be in Dawn's best interest if you went now.”
“We can discuss this when Dawn is gone.” My father said then glanced at me. “You go and have fun sweetie just come home at a reasonable hour. Preferably before the sun goes down.” He gave me a playful hug as the two exited my room discussing my step-mother.
I felt exhausted like my whole world had been intruded. When I blinked, I could see the two of them and the similarities between them. I could honestly see why Miranda, or Lilliana, or whatever her name is would hold on so tightly to Wesley.
I showered quickly and got dressed, settling on a simple black sweater dress and my combat boots. Tying my hair up in a loop on the top of my head and modestly putting on makeup I looked the best I was probably going to all things considered. I had managed to cover the black bags under my eyes. They were dark brown right now due to the amount of anger I was carrying around with me. I pulled out my phone and sent Adam a text.
Me: We still on for lunch?
After a moment my phone buzzed. I smoothed out my dress one more time and looked at the flashing object on my dresser.
Adam: Yeah, just got out of church. Meet you at my house?
Me: OK
And just like that I was ready to go. I left my room in a whirl taking notice that my parents were nowhere to be seen. I gave a little shrug and left the house. Getting behind the wheel and pulling out of my driveway felt as if I was forgetting something vital from last night’s visions. Yet I knew that it would still be there once I returned home, right now I was a normal girl with a normal life.
I tried to brush off the whole ordeal, but it was deeming difficult to do so. I reached over and flipped the radio on and was comforted by the squealing guitars of heavy metal, instantly I was able to lose myself in my imagination.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Stupid Girl
I pulled into Adam’s driveway as he and his father was getting out of the car. His dad gave me a slight wave and headed towards the front door while Adam hung back to meet me. His father was a nice man, I had only met him a time or two but he was always very pleasant. His father was very quiet, rarely struck up a conversation with people he didn't know. He said his dad hadn't been the same since his mother left three years earlier.
He looked nice today, a white button down shirt over blue jeans and black Doc Martins. I found it fitting for the image of the innocent white knight Hell bent on running away from love and all the things that came with it. I have to admit I think watching his parents’ marriage fall apart is the main reason he was so guarded when it came to anything love. You could just think the word in your head and watch his face turn green.
“Hey there stranger.” He said as he wrapped his arms around me in a warm hug.
“Hey there yourself.” I said as he squeezed me hard. I fought to catch my breath as I felt the bones in my back begin to pop.
“So I was thinking we could just have lunch here. I only have a few hours till my mother gets here." I frowned.
I thought that I would have more time than just a few hours.
“That sucks.” I said softly.
He looked at my pouty face and smirked.
“I have some family party at my grandparents’ house this afternoon. I figure though we can chat for a few hours and you can leave right before she gets here.” I nodded in agreement as I followed him inside the two story brick house.
“I’m making grilled cheese and tomato soup, does that sound good you two?” His father yelled when the front door closed.
“Yeah dad, that sounds great.” Adam yelled back. “So tell me about you and Aaron?” He teased me.
He couldn’t even let me get into the house before grilling me on my love life. I had forgotten how great it was to have a friend constantly plunge into your life.
“What is there to tell?” I asked not really understanding the fuss over me dating someone other than Wesley.
“Rumor has it that it’s serious.” He bat his eyes at me and laughed.
“Good lord.” I breathed. “No it is not serious. We have spent the last two nights together. He met my father that is really the extent of the seriousness.”
“Oh my, so he has met the mysterious father figure." He teased me then suddenly looked at me sticking his lip out like a toddler. “I’m hurt since I have yet to meet the man that sired you.”
I punched him playfully, and he laughed. “So I’m assuming that you are still holding out thinking that Wesley is going to come back around? I don't understand what you ever saw in that boy in the first place. He was rude, and he dressed funny.” Adam led me up the stairs into his room where we sat down on the gaming couch as he turned on the TV.
“Nope, I cannot be with someone that finds it necessary to cheat. What do you mean he dressed funny?” I felt my fingers itch, and I sat on my hands just in case.
“I don't know. I figured I needed something other than the fact that he was rude. Aaron is a nice guy and all but he has his secrets just like Wesley did.” He looked at me and gave me a smug smile. “There were some rumors last year that he spent the previous summer in a rehabilitation camp for drug abuse. However nobody ever saw him do anything, so it was wiped off as just a rumor.” Adam reached over and turned on his X-box and grabbed two controls tossing one onto my lap.
I started at it blankly.
Did he really think that I would play video games with him?
“Well you know what they say about rumors.” I said deciding a few rounds of Halo weren’t going to kill me.
“That there is some truth in them?” He asked flopping down on the couch next to me and starting the game.
“That isn’t exactly what I was going for.” I sighed. “He’s a nice guy. I have fun with him even though our first date was crashed by Wesley and Miranda.”
“Oh Hell, I bet that was painful. Seeing him with her.” He said something under his breath that I couldn’t make out.
“I think it hurt him more to see me with Aaron then it was for me to see him with her. Maybe I’m over it, who knows. Maybe we really are too young to know what love really is.” I said softly. “I don’t foresee this thing with Aaron lasting long but it is nice to have someone around that says that they want to fix you.”
“Fix you huh?” He laughed. “That’s one Hell of a pick-up line. I’m going to have to remember that one.”
“Since we are on the subject of those we are dating, how’s Nadine?” I asked simply wanting to change the subject.
“She’s good, she’s been dealing with some family issues here recently so we haven’t seen each other. She texts me all day every day wanting to know what I’ve eaten and where I’ve been.” He sounded annoyed.
“You still plan on ending things with her?” I asked listening to him growl as his character died in the game. I smiled to myself. Though I rarely play video games I am very good at them.
“At some point yeah. She’s still Hell bent on getting me to fall in love with her. I keep telling her we are too young and I still have one more year of high school after this one I’m not ready to start picking out china patterns.” He glanced at me, there was something different in his eyes they seemed warmer than usual.
“I’m sorry to hear that. I hear spring is the best time to get married,” He reached over and punched me softly on the arm.
“Not funny Weathers, not funny at all.” I always knew he was playing with me when he called me by my last name.
We played the game until his father called us down for lunch. We all sat together at the table eating our grilled cheese and tomato soup.
His father was quiet and kept glancing between the two of us before he finally spoke.
“So Dawn, what are your plans for college?” he said between bites.
I had never been asked this question, so I wasn’t sure how I supposed to answer. My mother never imprinted the image of college in my head like most kids mothers. The thought of me being out of school seemed more of a reason for us to travel more, see the world. My mother had so many places she wanted to go. So many people she wanted to save.
“I’m not sure, Mr. Snyder.” I paused and looked at Adam. He had this horrified look on his face. “More than likely I will wind up taking some classes at the community college. My mother wants to take some time to visit family after I get out of school.”
“That sounds like fun.” He said softly, then without a hesitation, “You excited about prom?”
Where were these questions coming from?
I blinked and felt a nudge on my thigh and Adam cleared his throat.
“Oh, of course, super stoked.” I lied. I hadn’t even thought about prom let alone graduation.
So much was going on I didn’t even realize that it was more than half way through the year. After a few more minutes of uncomfortable conversation Mr. Snyder excused himself from the table and left the room.
“Of course!” Adam laughed picking up my bowl and plate and walking to the sink. “You haven’t even thought about it. Nadine is obsessing over what she is going to wear already. We are two months out and she’s already making plans.” He rolled his eyes and rinsed the dishes. “You know if I didn’t know you already I would be questioning your sanity. You are nothing like the other girls at school.”
“I’ll take that as a complement.” I laughed feeling great after having a normal lunch with a normal family talking about normal things.
It wasn’t long after lunch when Adam’s mom sent him a message stating that she was on her way to get him. I had never met the woman, but he was scared she would have heart failure if she met me. My smile alone could cause her to have an aneurism, my laugh a full fledge heart attack. His mother was very close minded so anything that didn’t match the same innocent texture of her son was not supposed to be near him. He didn’t want her to whip out a can of bitch-be-gone on me. We said our farewells, and I departed his driveway right as his mother was pulling in.
****
I didn’t want to go home right away, so I sent Aaron a message and decided to stop at his place for a bit just to see how he was doing. Since his run in with my father the day before I wanted to make sure there was no neurological damage.
I was still wrapping my mind around the whole Daddy thing in the first place. There was no way of knowing what kind of damage my father could have on a teenage brain. Besides going home now was just going to make me start thinking, and I didn’t want to think. I had been through enough for a day all I wanted to do was forget all I knew for at least for an hour or two more.
Aaron didn’t live far from Adam, just right down the street. I hadn’t even cut the engine, and he was outside opening my car door. I thought his eyes were going to pop out of his face when I got out of the car. You would think this boy had never seen a girl before as he smiled broadly. I didn’t know what was catching his fancy. The dress was in no way revealing, the only part of me that showed was my knees and maybe half of my calves.
“I’m digging the outfit.” He said wrapping his arms around my waist and pushing his lips to mine.
His kiss seemed heated and intense as he forced my lips open taking the kiss deeper than any of the others we had shared. He pressed me against my car his body molding to mine as he hands lingered up and down my sides. I wasn’t sure if I wanted what he wanted, that much was for certain. He pulled away from me panting and stepped back looking at me again. I couldn’t understand the lust on his face. His eyes were glassy, his pupils dilated, and he wouldn’t take his hands off of me from the time we left my car till we were in the living room of his upper class home.
He brought me a Dr. Pepper from the kitchen and sat down on the couch next to me. The TV was off, but the radio was on, old school Limp Bizkut playing softly from the speakers, and a book I had never read was lying face down on the arm of the couch. I didn’t have the chance to read the title or get the name of the author before his lips crashed into mine again just as heated as they had been outside.
The only difference now was that we were out of the public eye so his hands wandered from my waste to my neck and then gradually down to my chest. I jumped when I felt his hands on my breasts. I gasped and pulled away from him looking him in the face trying to figure out what exactly he was doing.
This didn’t feel right. It didn’t feel like we were supposed to be at this point yet. Yes, I had slept with Wesley after knowing him for a short period but this was different. There was a connection there that I didn’t have with Aaron. I would describe it as some primal calling that had to be tamed. Now I was just feeling queasy like it was my first time all over again. This nervous flutter was in the pit of my stomach pestering me.
“I’m sorry.” He breathed sitting up and glancing at me out of the corner of his eyes.
“No, it’s ok I was just not expecting that is all.” I breathed straightening my skirt that had somehow ridden up mid-thigh.
“I just thought that...” He stopped himself. “Never mind.”
“No, what?” I asked softly inching a little closer to him.
I liked the boy well enough I just wasn’t sure I was ready to add another notch to my bedpost quite this quickly. Then again Wesley had wasted no time by being with Miranda. This in no way made me question my feelings for Wesley. I still loved him. I just wasn’t with him.
How does that even work, how could he not tell that she wasn’t human?
I mean you would think he could feel her coldness with every inch of his naked flesh. The images in my head made me shiver, and the thought made me want to gouge my eyes out with a spork.
I suddenly felt a hardening in my heart and without thinking I pressed my lips to Aaron’s hard and hungry. Here I was again, and my demonic side was fighting to lose control. I felt hunger and guilt, elated and scared. I felt like I had an angel and a demon on my shoulder telling me what I should do and what I shouldn't. Both of them whispering in my ears to give in to my animal instincts and I was.
Panting and biting, clawing and groaning my heart pounding my veins icy and I felt nothing. Absolutely nothing for the boy just this immense want and need to own him to make him bend to my will, to corrupt whatever innocence was left in him. I felt something change, but I didn't care I would own his soul.
I let his hands wander; we didn’t have to go all the way I could let a little go at a time.
How else was I going to heal from everything that had happened to me?
Aaron’s hands were firmly on my hips and he was pulling me up to my feet his lips still attached to mine. In heated visions I started clawing at his shirt biting his flesh relishing in the fact that his soul was about to be mine.
I’m not exactly sure what happened. One second I’m standing there so much heat radiating through my body not giving a damn about anything staring at this absolutely gorgeous blonde haired boy. The next I’m suddenly back in that alleyway behind the club staring into the black eyes of my assailant. Before I knew it I screamed pushing Aaron away from me only it wasn’t Aaron I was seeing, it was John.
He was staring at me astonished. I didn’t know what to do so instead I collapsed to my knees crying. Suddenly the images of what had been happening were tearing through my body and I felt guilt, horrible guilt. I couldn't understand what had just happened.
His arms were around me in a second holding me close running his agile fingers through my hair, kissing my forehead, telling me it would be ok. The want to own him still lingered in the back of my mind my fingers still itched to cling to him and I fought the urge t
o look at him with a seductive grin.
He had forgotten what had happened, he couldn't have expected this, couldn't have known that I would have cases of collapsing. That I would remember things, see things, and be scared to death of any intimate moment for a long time. I should be thankful for that, who knows what would have happened if I hadn't been brought back to Earth.
“I forgot.” He soothed my tears holding onto me tightly.
“It’s not your fault.” I sniffed.
“No, but when I saw you I wasn’t thinking.” I let out a wet snort, and he kissed the top of my head again. “I don’t know what I was thinking I suppose. Hormones tend to have a mind of their own when your girlfriend shows up looking all sexy.”
Did he really just call me his girlfriend?
I was definitely not ready for that. However, this was not the time for me to correct him.
“It’s ok, I wanted to,” I lied, “Then all I could see was him and I felt so much fear.” I wiped my tears from my eyes and looked at him through my eyelashes.
He softly touched my face and leaned in putting his lips to mine. The kiss was light and was meant to be only reassuring, but it sent a spark through my soul. I felt the darkness in me squeal but I pushed it back letting the light through. Maybe it was the fact he was comforting me after all that had just happened, or maybe it was the fact that he made me feel safe. I wrapped my arms around his neck and reciprocated the kiss.
It deepened slowly, but effectively, my heart slowly feeling warmth instead of rock hard ice, my veins icy instead of full of fire. My body was confused, it had no clue what was going on. What had not felt right only moments ago was now. It felt as if I would die without his touch, without fulfilling this incredible need, without filling this empty void.
What happened over the next half hour was blurry and emotionally confusing. Though my body reacted pleasantly to everything that he did I couldn’t help but close my eyes and think of my Wesley, my sweet innocent Wesley. When I opened my eyes again, I could see him hovering over me, that smile plastered to his lips his blue eyes sparkling. My body felt warm and invigorated like it was being mended, put back together all scars erased.