He thrust into me with such force I felt the bed moving beneath us. Sweat beaded his face, and his breath came in loud gasps. His hands squeezed my wrists brutally, holding me still so he could pound into me as hard as he wanted. My fingers curled into fists, nails biting into my palms, as I tried to control the flood of sensation that threatened to overwhelm me.
I didn’t want to like this. Brian was being so rough with me I’d be bruised and sore when this was over. Probably what he was doing should be hurting me even now, but endorphins or adrenaline or just plain desperation had me feeling no pain. The pressure on my wrists, the sensation of being pinned down, should have angered me. There was no give-and-take to this lovemaking. And yet my body sang with the pleasure of it, my back arching, my heels digging into his ass, my mouth open on a silent scream.
Then the climax hit me, and the scream was no longer silent. The sound that escaped me was raw, and urgent, and so loud they might have heard me in the next building. My cry triggered Brian’s release, and he pounded into me even harder, if that was possible.
When it was over, he went limp on top of me, his hands releasing their death grip on my wrists as his forehead dropped to touch mine. We were both gasping for breath, both drenched in sweat. I barely had the strength for it, but I wrapped my arms around him and held him to me, my hands stroking the sweat-slicked skin of his back.
As the sweat cooled, I became aware of a burning sensation between my legs and a fierce ache in both my wrists. Apparently, the adrenaline had worn off, but despite the discomfort, I couldn’t regret what we’d done. Brian might not have been the sweet, sensitive lover I’d come to expect, but he was still the man I loved.
Still panting, he slipped out of me, then slid his arms under me and scooted me all the way onto the bed, climbing on after me and wrapping me in his arms. Our legs twined, and he tucked my head under his chin, my ear pressed against his chest so I could hear the pounding of his heart.
We didn’t speak, instead lying quietly in each other’s arms as we caught our breath. I closed my eyes and inhaled the musky, familiar scent of him, the scent I’d missed so desperately in the days since I’d turned him away. And I knew I was lost.
It didn’t matter what danger being with me put Brian in, and it didn’t matter that I was handing him the power to crush my heart. I couldn’t keep pushing him away. I needed him too badly, needed to be with the man who loved me just the way I was, even if I wasn’t sure that love could stand the test of time.
I raised my head to say something appropriately mushy, but before I opened my mouth, the phone rang. Brian and I grimaced at the same time.
“They can leave a message,” he said, stroking my still-sweaty cheek with one hand.
I was severely tempted to ignore the goddamn phone. There was so much I still had to say to Brian, and I had to say it now or I might chicken out. But as Lugh had pointed out on more than one occasion, there was much more at stake here than my own life and happiness. I sat up with an unhappy moan, wincing slightly at the soreness between my legs. “With all the drama surrounding my life, I have to at least see who it is.”
I felt his eyes on me as I reached for the phone and checked the caller ID. It was the front desk, which usually meant a visitor or a package. It was too late for a package.
I picked up the phone, then practically dropped it when Mr. Watkins, the front desk clerk, told me my father wanted to come up. My brain did a few jumping jacks as I tried to figure out (1) what the likelihood was that this was really my father, and (2) what the hell he could want to see me about if it was.
Mr. Watkins waited patiently while I thought about it for what felt like five minutes.
“Ms. Kingsley?” he finally prompted when my hesitation lasted too long.
If my father really had come out of hiding to talk to me, then I supposed I had no choice but to see him. Maybe the Spirit Society had sent him on Dougal’s behalf to try to pry information out of me. Then again, maybe Cooper had called and told him what I now knew about my past, and my father had come to try to make amends. Hey, it made a nice fantasy! “Send him up.”
Brian looked at me reprovingly as I slipped out of bed.
I gave him an apologetic smile as I pulled my jeans back on. “It’s my father. I have to talk to him.” There was so much I needed to say, but the thought of beating the crap out of him for what he’d allowed the Society to do to me was more tempting than I wanted to admit. “I’ll try to make it quick.” I dragged my shirt on over my head, not bothering with the bra. “Wait for me,” I said, then bent to give Brian a quick kiss.
But he got up and reached for his clothes. “I’ll wait,” he assured me before I could protest. “I’m just not going to wait naked in bed with your father in the next room.”
I laughed briefly, until I caught another glimpse of the stun gun clipped to his belt. “When did you get that?” I asked with a jerk of my chin.
“This morning. I was feeling a little skittish after everything that’s happened.”
I frowned. I didn’t like the idea of Brian carrying a weapon. Yeah, I wanted him to have some defense in the event of a demon attack, but it seemed like another step down a path I wished I could keep him from walking. I glanced at the bruises that were forming around my wrists and realized he might already be farther down that path than I liked to admit.
My doorbell rang, and though I wanted to stay here with Brian, to talk to him and to work things out, I knew now was not the time. Leaving him to finish getting dressed, I slipped out into the living room as the bell rang a second time. I hesitated before I answered the door. My father had conspired with the Society and with Lugh’s brothers to have me possessed by a demon against my will. He’d drugged me so he could take me to the hospital, then apparently left me to Cooper and Neely’s mercy without a second thought. Had he known what those bastards had been planning to do to me? Had he condoned them torturing me?
My mind rebelled at the thought. No matter that he wasn’t my biological father, no matter that we’d never gotten along, he had still raised me since I was a baby. My mind couldn’t encompass the idea that he was evil. Yes, he’d tried to give me to the demons, but in his worldview being possessed was a good thing.
The bell rang a third time, but despite my bone-deep conviction that my father wouldn’t harm me, I fished my Taser out of my handbag before answering. I checked through the peephole to be sure it really was my father on the doorstep, then swung the door open. As a concession to our close, personal relationship, I kept the Taser down by my side instead of pointing at him, although it was armed and ready to go.
His face as he stood there regarding me was studiously neutral, even when he saw the Taser. I had to resist the urge to punch him.
“Nice of you to drop by, Pops,” I said. “Give me one good reason I shouldn’t slam the door in your face.”
His expression didn’t change. “You wouldn’t have opened the door in the first place if you didn’t want to talk to me.”
“I want to talk to you about as much as I want to have my tonsils removed without anesthetic.”
“Then by all means slam the door.”
I almost did it. Almost convinced myself I’d had more than my quota of confrontations today. But I knew if I shut him out now, I might never hear from him again. And boy did I have a lot of questions for him!
With a grunt of frustration—I really hate having my bluff called—I flung the door all the way open and stepped back. Dad’s expression finally changed, a hint of triumph sparking in his eyes. He stepped through the doorway then closed the door behind him and turned the dead bolt.
I didn’t feel like offering him a seat, so I stood in front of him in my most aggressive posture, legs shoulder-width apart, head held high, finger on the trigger of my Taser. I probably looked like a bodyguard wannabe, but I didn’t give a damn.
“So where the hell did you and Mom disappear to?” I asked.
He regarded me steadily. “If we’d wanted you to know
, we’d have left a forwarding address.”
I blinked at that. I was the smart-ass of the family, and my dad usually stuck to “just the facts.” I supposed he was under a lot of strain these days, though I had to admit he didn’t look particularly stressed out. In fact, if I didn’t know better, I’d think he was enjoying himself.
“I assume Cooper called and told you I remembered what you did to me.”
For half a second, I thought he looked surprised, but that hint of expression was gone before I was sure. “I never did anything to you.”
I waved his protest away. “You let Dr. Neely and Cooper have their way with me. They couldn’t have done it without your permission. Even you can’t deny your role in that.”
He shrugged. “If you expect me to wring my hands in guilt, you’ve got another think coming. I could have insisted your mother abort you. All in all I think I’ve treated you rather decently.”
I curled my lip in disgust. “If that’s the case, you need to look up ‘decently’ in the dictionary. Don’t you feel even a hint of remorse for what you did?”
I’d never been under the impression that my dad harbored any great love for me, but I’d always thought he’d felt at least some parental responsibility. Based on his total lack of remorse, I supposed that wasn’t the case.
He waved off my complaint as if it meant nothing to him. “That’s not what I came here to talk about.”
I was seriously tempted to force the issue, but after he and my mom had made such a production of disappearing, I figured if he’d come out of the woodwork voluntarily, it must have been something really important. So I swallowed my questions and my emotions and let him put me off.
“So what did you come to talk about?”
He gave me a flinty, steely-eyed glare that chilled me to the marrow. “I came to talk about the host you transferred Lugh into. I believe you said his name was Peter Bishop?” The glare was followed by a triumphant smile.
I shook my head, clearing the cobwebs as any number of sickening revelations bloomed in my mind. Der Jäger was the only one who knew the name of the fictitious host who’d taken Lugh from me. He could have told his cohorts about it, but he didn’t exactly strike me as a team player. Raphael had told me Der Jäger was safely imprisoned back in the Demon Realm. I had believed Raphael would never do anything to endanger Lugh.
But the man who’d raised me as his daughter was watching me now with a predatory gleam in his eyes. A gleam that I couldn’t help recognizing as evil. Raphael had lied.
I swallowed hard. “Der Jäger, I presume?”
Chapter 25
Der Jäger’s smile broadened as he took a step closer to me. I took a corresponding step back as my Taser hand rose. My reflexes are pretty quick, but not as quick as a demon’s. Before I had a chance to get off a shot, Der Jäger slapped the Taser out of my hand, sending it flying across the room. I backpedaled, but he didn’t immediately pursue.
“We meet again,” he said with a mocking bow. “I was disappointed we weren’t able to finish our little…chat.”
“Yeah, me, too,” I said, edging toward the Taser, which lay on the floor by the couch. Der Jäger had destroyed the minds of his previous hosts. My stomach curdled as I realized that in all likelihood, my dad was now officially a vegetable.
Had Dad willingly taken Der Jäger, knowing what the demon was planning to do to me? I shook my head. I’d had a lot of bad thoughts about my dad, and I would never forgive him for handing me over to Cooper and Neely, but I refused to believe he would have given himself to a sociopathic demon. He was a fanatic, but he had at least a small streak of decency in him.
My throat tightened as grief tried to push tears out of my eyes. I fought them, hating to give Der Jäger even the faintest hint of satisfaction.
“Tell me,” Der Jäger said, still smiling, “was that a real name you gave me, or did you just make it up?”
I took another step toward the Taser. Der Jäger allowed it, as if he didn’t notice what I was up to. Every instinct in my body screamed that he was toying with me. However, I didn’t see any more attractive options to fix my hopes on.
“I told you the truth,” I said. “But since I don’t know where Peter Bishop is these days, I don’t have anything else I can tell you. Even if I wanted to.”
The arrogant prick still didn’t stop me from moving closer to the Taser. Hope speared through me. Maybe he was so arrogant I’d be able to make him pay for it.
“How’s the finger?” he asked, and I stopped in my tracks.
Shit! I’d taken the tape off when I took Brian to bed, and it hadn’t even occurred to me to put it back on to face my father. Der Jäger could see with his own eyes that my finger was uninjured. What were the chances he wouldn’t be able to figure out what that meant? His smile told me they were nil.
Der Jäger cocked his head, a furrow appearing between his brows. “How very odd,” he said. “All the evidence says you must still be hosting Lugh, and yet I can’t sense him on you at all. Why is that?”
I leapt for the Taser, hoping his puzzlement would leave him momentarily distracted.
His body slammed into mine with the force of a Mack truck, and we both fell to the floor. Der Jäger’s weight crushed the breath out of me, stealing my cry of pain, but we still made a mighty crash when we landed. I was facedown, so I jerked my head backward, my skull making solid contact with his nose. I heard the crunch of cartilage, and felt the hot, sticky gush of blood on the back of my neck.
Der Jäger didn’t seem to much mind the pain, but I think I surprised him, because I was able to pitch him off me. I reached for the Taser, my fingers almost closing on it, but Der Jäger grabbed my ankle and yanked me back. The motion sent the Taser skidding across the floor, once again well out of reach.
The door to the bedroom opened, and my heart nearly stopped when Brian came charging through.
“No!” I screamed, unable to muster a more coherent protest in my sudden terror.
Why do men always feel the need to come riding to the rescue even when they know they’re outgunned? I swore to myself that if we both lived through this, I was going to have a long, heartfelt talk with Brian about his misguided hero complex.
My own cry of distress was a mistake as well. Even through the blood that coated his face from his broken, misshapen nose, I could see the vicious smile that tugged at the corners of Der Jäger’s mouth. He let go of my ankle, homing in on a new target. I threw myself at him, wrapping my arms around him even though I knew I hadn’t the strength to hold him.
“Brian, run!” I screamed. “Get out of here!”
But the curse of testosterone poisoning wouldn’t let him leave me there to fight Der Jäger alone. Instead of running, he was wading into the fight. All it would take was one touch of skin on skin, and Der Jäger could take possession of the man I loved. And destroy him.
No way I was letting that happen! I’d already lost my father to Der Jäger. I refused to lose Brian, too.
In desperation, I tried to open my mental doors to Lugh. After all, Der Jäger already knew I had him, so there was no longer any reason to hide. Pain stabbed through my head, but though I strained to let Lugh in, my body and mind stayed stubbornly linked.
Der Jäger easily broke my hold on him, lurching to his feet to meet Brian’s charge. Despair strangled the scream in my throat.
Der Jäger sidestepped, like a matador evading an enraged bull. Brian’s eyes widened in surprise, and he tried to pull up. I noticed his right hand reaching under the tails of his shirt, going for the stun gun. He should have drawn the stun gun immediately, but I guess reaching for a weapon isn’t a corporate attorney’s first instinct, especially when he’d just bought the damn thing this morning.
Before his hand found the stun gun, Der Jäger grabbed him, hauling Brian up against his chest while pinning his arms to his sides. Brian’s shirt was long-sleeved, so there was no skin-to-skin contact at first. Not until Der Jäger wrapped a hand around his
throat and squeezed.
Brian’s eyes bugged out, and I could hear him struggle to drag air into his lungs. However, he was breathing, and since my dad hadn’t collapsed to the floor in a heap, I knew Der Jäger hadn’t taken Brian yet. Of course, why would he, when my own reactions had revealed what a stellar hostage Brian would make?
I hardly dared move or breathe. I sat frozen on the floor where I had fallen, one hand reaching out toward Brian as I cursed fate for putting me back in my worst nightmare. The Taser had come to rest near the legs of the dining room table, and there was no way I was getting my hands on it again. My head throbbed, but Lugh couldn’t help me now, so I resisted his push. He knew how much Brian meant to me, and he would try his best to protect him. However, I knew that in the grand scheme of things, Lugh would consider Brian expendable. I could never think of Brian that way, and so it was best if I remained in control, even if I didn’t know what I could do to help either of us.
“Shall I take a new host?” Der Jäger asked, his eyes dilated with excitement as Brian struggled helplessly.
I swallowed hard, trembling in every limb. “Please don’t,” I said in a quavering voice. “I’ll do whatever you want. Tell you whatever you want to know. Just let Brian go.” Like I thought there was a chance in hell that was going to happen!
Der Jäger’s eyes lit with a gloating smile. “I knew you could be reasonable. Behave yourself, and I just might let your boyfriend go.”
“Let him go now!”
He laughed. “Why should I?”
I wished I could think of a clever answer, but all my brain could focus on was the threat to the man I loved. Being in love sapped every ounce of logic from my mind, and I just sat on the floor and sputtered like an idiot. Lugh gave another push, and I mentally snarled at him to knock it off. I wasn’t letting him in, and that was final.
The moment of pain seemed to refocus some of my brain cells, and I found the will to answer Der Jäger’s question.
“Because if you don’t let him go now, I’ll know you never intend to let him go, and I won’t have any incentive to answer you.”