CHAPTER XIV. LAMPOURDE'S DELICACY
It is easy to imagine the frame of mind in which the Duke ofVallombreuse returned home after his repulse by Isabelle, and her rescuefrom his arms by the timely intervention of her friends, the comedians.At sight of his face, fairly livid and contorted with suppressed rage,his servants trembled and shrunk away from him--as well they might--forhis natural cruelty was apt to vent itself upon the first unhappydependent that happened to come in his way when his wrath was excited.He was not an easy master to serve, even in his most genial mood--thishaughty, exacting young nobleman--and in his frantic fits of anger hewas more savage and relentless than a half-starved tiger. Upon enteringhis own house he rushed through it like a whirlwind, shutting everydoor behind him with such a violent bang that the very walls shook,and pieces of the gilt mouldings round the panels were snapped off, andscattered on the floor. When he reached his own room he flung down hishat with such force that it was completely flattened, and the featherbroken short off. Then, unable to breathe freely, he tore open hisrich velvet pourpoint, as he rushed frantically to and fro, without anyregard for the superb diamond buttons that fastened it, which flew inevery direction. The exquisitely fine lace ruffles round his neck werereduced to shreds in a second, and with a vigorous kick he knocked overa large arm-chair that stood in his way, and left it upside down, withits legs in the air.
"The impudent little hussy!" he cried, as he continued his frenziedwalk, like a wild beast in a cage. "I have a great mind to have herthrown into prison, there to be well-whipped, and have her hair shavedoff, before being sent to a lunatic asylum--or better still to somestrict convent where they take in bad girls who have been forciblyrescued from lives of infamy. I could easily manage it. But no, it wouldbe worse than useless--persecution would only make her hate me more, andwould not make her love that cursed de Sigognac a bit less. How can Ipunish her? what on earth shall I do?" and still he paced restlessly toand fro, cursing and swearing, and raving like a madman. While he wasindulging in these transports of rage, without paying any attention tohow the time was passing, evening drew on, and it was rapidly growingdark when his faithful Picard, full of commiseration, screwed up hiscourage to the highest point, and ventured to go softly in--though hehad not been called, and was disobeying orders--to light the candlesin his master's room; thinking that he was quite gloomy enough alreadywithout being left in darkness as well, and hoping that the lights mighthelp to make him more cheerful. They did seem to afford him some relief,in that they caused a diversion; for his thoughts, which had been allof Isabelle and her cruel repulse of his passionate entreaties, suddenlyflew to his successful rival, the Baron de Sigognac.
"But how is this?" he cried, stopping short in his rapid pacing up anddown the room. "How comes it that that miserable, degraded wretch hasnot been despatched before this? I gave the most explicit orders aboutit to that good-for-nothing Merindol. In spite of what Vidalinc says,I am convinced that I shall succeed with Isabelle when once that cursedlover of hers is out of my way. She will be left entirely at my mercythen, and will have to submit to my will and pleasure with the bestgrace she can muster--for I shall not allow any sulking or tears.Doubtless she clings so obstinately to that confounded brute in thebelief that she can induce him to marry her in the end. She means to beMme. la Baronne de Sigognac--the aspiring little actress! That mustbe the reason of all this mighty display of mock modesty, and of herventuring to repulse the attentions of a duke, as scornfully, by Jove!as if he were a stable-boy. But she shall rue it--the impertinent littleminx! and I'll have no mercy shown to the audacious scoundrel who daredto disable this right arm of mine. Halloa there! send Merindol up to meinstantly, do you hear?"
Picard flew to summon him, and in a few moments the discomfited bullymade his appearance; pale from abject terror, with teeth chattering andlimbs trembling, as he was ushered into the dread presence of his angrylord. In spite of his efforts to assume the sang-froid he was so farfrom feeling, he staggered like a drunken man, though he had not drankenough wine that day to drown a fly, and did not dare to lift his eyesto his master's face.
"Well, you cowardly beast," said Vallombreuse angrily, how long, pray,are you going to stand there speechless, like a stupid fool, with thathang-dog air, as if you already had the rope that you so richly deserveround your wicked neck? "I only awaited your lordship's orders,"stammered Merindol, trying to appear at ease, and failing lamentably."My lord duke knows that I am entirely devoted to his service--even tobeing hanged, if it seems good to your lordship."
"Enough of that cant!" interrupted the duke impatiently. "Didn't Icharge you to have that cursed de Sigognac, otherwise Captain Fracasse,cleared out of my way? You have not done it--my orders have not beenobeyed. It is worth while, upon my word, to keep confounded hiredrascals to do such work for me, at this rate! All that you are good foris to stuff yourself in the kitchen, you dastardly beast, and to guzzlemy good wine from morning until night. But I've had enough of this, byJove! and if there is not a change, and that without any further lossof time, to the hangman you shall go--do you hear? just as sure as youstand there, gaping like a drivelling idiot."
"My lord duke," said Merindol in a trembling voice, "is unjust to hisfaithful servant, who desires nothing but to do his lord's bidding. Butthis Baron de Sigognac is not to be disposed of so easily as my lordbelieves. Never was there a braver, more fearless man. In our firstattack on him, at Poitiers, he got the better of us in a most wonderfulway--we never saw the like of it--and all he had to fight with was adull, rusty sword, not intended for use at all; a theatre sword, justfor looks. And when we tried to do for him here in Paris, the very nighthe got here, it all came to naught, because he was so watchful, andsomehow suspected what we were up to, and was ready for us; and thatupset our beautiful little plan entirely. I never was so surprised in mylife; and there was nothing for us to do, the whole four of us, but toget out of his sight as fast as we could, and he standing there laughingat us. Oh! he's a rare one, is Captain Fracasse. And now he knows myface, so I can't go near him myself. But I have engaged the servicesof a particular friend of mine--the bravest man and the best fighter inParis--he hasn't his equal in the world with the sword, they all say. Heis lying in wait for him on the Pont-Neuf now, at this very moment, andthere'll be no mistake this time. Lampourde will be sure to despatch himfor us--if it is not done already--and that without the slightest dangerof your lordship's name being mixed up with the affair in any way, as itmight have been if your lordship's own servants had done it."
"The plan is not a bad one," said the young duke, somewhat mollified,"and perhaps it is better that it should be done in that way. But areyou really sure of the courage and skill of this friend of yours? Hewill need both to get the better of that confounded de Sigognac, who isno coward, and a master hand with the sword, I am bound to acknowledge,though I do hate him like the devil."
"My lord need have no fears," said Merindol enthusiastically, being nowmore at his ease. "Jacquemin Lampourde is a hero, a wonder, as everybodywill tell your lordship. He is more valiant than Achilles, or the greatAlexander. He is not spotless certainly, like the Chevalier Bayard, buthe is fearless."
Picard, who had been hovering about for a few minutes in an uneasy way,now seeing that his master was in a better humour, approached andtold him that a very odd-looking man was below, who asked to see himimmediately on most important business.
"You may bring him in," said the duke, "but just warn him, Picard, thatif he dares to intrude upon me for any trifling matter, I'll have himskinned alive before I let him go."
Mirindol was just about leaving the room, when the entrance of thenewcomer rooted him to the spot; he was so astonished and alarmed thathe could not move hand or foot. And no wonder, for it was no otherthan the hero whose name he had just spoken--Jacquemin Lampourde inperson--and the bare fact of his having dared to penetrate so boldlyinto the dread presence of that high and mighty seignior, the Duke ofVallombreuse, ignoring entirely the agent through whom
his services hadbeen engaged, showed of itself that something very extraordinary musthave taken place.
Lampourde himself did not seem to be in the least disconcerted, andafter winking at his friend furtively in a very knowing way, stoodunabashed before the duke, with the bright light of the many wax candlesshining full upon his face. There was a red mark across his forehead,where his hat had been pressed down over it, and great drops of sweatstood on it, as if he had been running fast, or exercising violently.His eyes, of a bluish gray tint, with a sort of metallic lustre inthem, were fixed upon those of the haughty young nobleman, with a calminsolence that made Merindol's blood run cold in his veins; his largenose, whose shadow covered all one side of his face, as the shadow ofMount Etna covers a considerable portion of the island of Sicily, stoodout prominently, almost grotesquely, in profile; his mustache, with itslong stiff points carefully waxed, which produced exactly the effect ofan iron skewer stuck through his upper lip, and the "royal" on his chincurled upward, like a comma turned the wrong way, all contributed tomake up a very extraordinary physiognomy, such as caricaturists dote on.He wore a large scarlet cloak, wrapped closely about his erect, vigorousform, and in one hand, which he extended towards the duke, he heldsuspended a well filled purse--a strange and mysterious proceeding whichMirindol could by no means understand.
"Well, you rascal," said the duke, after staring for a moment inastonishment at this odd-looking specimen, "what does this mean? Are youoffering alms to me, pray, or what? with your purse there held out atarm's length, apparently for my acceptance."
"In the first place, my lord duke," said Lampourde, with perfectsang-froid and gravity, "may it not displease your highness, but I amnot a rascal. My name is Jacquemin Lampourde, and I ply the sword for aliving. My profession is an honourable one. I have never degraded myselfby taking part in trade of any kind, or by manual labour. Killing is mybusiness, at the risk of my own life and limb--for I always do my workalone, unaided, armed only with my trusty sword. Fair play is a jewel,and I would scorn to take a mean advantage of anybody. I always givewarning before I attack a man, and let him have a chance to defendhimself--having a horror of treachery, and cowardly, sneaking ways. Whatprofession could be more noble than mine, pray? I am no common, brutalassassin, my lord duke, and I beseech your lordship to take back thatoffensive epithet, which I could never accept, save in a friendly,joking way--it outrages too painfully the sensitive delicacy of myamour-propre, my lord!"
"Very well, so be it, Maitre Jacquemin Lampourde, since you desire it,"answered Vallombreuse, very much amused at the oddity of his strangevisitor. "And now have the goodness to explain your business here, witha purse in your hand, that you certainly appear to be steadily offeringto me."
Jacquemin satisfied by this concession to his susceptibility, suddenlyjerked his head forward, without bending his body, while he waved thehat that he held slowly to and fro, making, according to his ideas,a salute that was a judicious mingling of the soldier's and thecourtier's--which ceremony being concluded, he proceeded as follows withhis explanation:
"Here is the whole thing in a nutshell, my lord duke! I received,from Merindol--acting for your lordship--part payment in advancefor despatching a certain Baron de Sigognac, commonly called CaptainFracasse. On account of circumstances beyond my control, I have not beenable to finish the job, and as I am a great stickler for honesty, andhonour also, I have hastened to bring back to you, my lord duke, themoney that I did not earn."
With these words he advanced a step, and with a gesture that was notdevoid of dignity, gently laid the purse down on a beautiful Florentinemosaic table, that stood at the duke's elbow.
"Verily," said Vallombreuse sneeringly, "we seem to have here one ofthose droll bullies who are good for naught but to figure in a comedy;an ass in a lion's skin, whose roar is nothing worse than a bray. Come,my man, own up frankly that you were afraid of that same de Sigognac."
"Jacquemin Lampourde has never been afraid of anybody in his life," thefighting man replied, drawing himself up haughtily, "and no adversaryhas ever seen his back. Those who know me will tell your lordship thateasy victories have no charm for me. I love danger and court it. Itake positive delight in it. I attacked the Baron de Sigognac 'secundumartem,' and with one of my very best swords--made by Alonzo de Sahagun,the elder, of Toledo."
"Well, and what happened then?" said the young duke eagerly. "It wouldseem that you could not have been victorious, since you wish to refundthis money, which was to pay you for despatching him."
"First let me inform your highness that in the course of my duels andcombats, of one sort and another, I have left no less than thirty-sevenmen stretched dead upon the ground--and that without counting in allthose I have wounded mortally or crippled for life. But this Baronde Sigognac intrenched himself within a circle of flashing steelas impenetrable as the walls of a granite fortress. I called intorequisition all the resources of my art against him, and tried inevery possible way to surprise him off his guard, but he was ready foreverything--as quick as a flash, as firm as a rock--he parried everythrust triumphantly, magnificently, with the most consummate science,and a grace and ease I have never seen equalled. He kept me busydefending myself too all the time, and more than once had nearly donefor me. His audacity was astonishing, his sang froid superb, and hisperfect mastery over his sword, and his temper, sublime--he was not aman, but a god. I could have fallen down and worshipped him. At the riskof being spitted on his sword, I prolonged the fight as much as I dared,so as to enjoy his marvellous, glorious, unparalleled method to theutmost. However, there had to be an end of it, and I thought I was sureof despatching him at last by means of a secret I possess--an infallibleand very difficult thrust, taught and bequeathed to me by the greatGirolamo of Naples, my beloved master--no man living has a knowledgeof it but myself--there is no one else left capable of executing itto perfection, and upon that depends its success. Well, my lord duke,Girolamo himself could not have done it better than I did to-night. Iwas thunderstruck when my opponent did not go down before it as if hehad been shot. I expected to see him lying dead at my feet. But notat all, by Jove! That devil of a Captain Fracasse parried my blow withdazzling swiftness, and with such force that my blade was broken shortoff, and I left completely at his mercy, with nothing but the stump inmy hand. See here, my lord duke! just look what he did to my precious,priceless Sahagun." And Jacquemin Lampourde, with a piteous air, drewout and exhibited the sorry remains of his trusty sword--almost weepingover it--and calling the duke's attention to the perfectly straight andeven break.
"Your highness can see that it was a prodigious blow that snapped thissteel like a pipe-stem, and it was done with such ease and precision.To despatch Captain Fracasse by fair means is beyond my skill, my lordduke, and I would scorn to resort to treachery. Like all truly bravemen, he is generous. I was left entirely defenceless, and he could havespitted me like an ortolan just by extending his arm, but he refrained;he let me go unscathed. A miraculous display of delicacy, as well aschivalrous generosity, from a gentleman assaulted in the gloaming on thePont-Neuf. I owe my life to him, and moreover, such a debt of gratitudeas I shall never be able to repay. I cannot undertake anything moreagainst him, my lord duke; henceforth he is sacred to me. Besides, itwould be a pity to destroy such a swordsman--good ones are rare in thesedegenerate days, and growing more so every year. I don't believe he hashis equal on earth. Most men handle a sword as if it were a broomsticknowadays, and then expect to be praised and applauded, the clumsy,stupid fools! Now, I have given my reasons for coming to inform yourhighness that I must resign the commission I had accepted. As for themoney there, I might perhaps have been justified in keeping it, toindemnify me for the great risk and peril I incurred, but such aquestionable proceeding would be repugnant to my tender conscience andmy honest pride, as your highness can understand."
"In the name of all the devils in the infernal regions, take back yourmoney!" cried Vallombreuse impetuously, "or I will have you pitched outof the window yonde
r, you and your money both. I never heard of sucha scrupulous scoundrel in my life. You, Merindol, and your cursedcrew, have not a spark of honour or honesty among you all; far enoughfrom it." Then perceiving that Lampourde hesitated about picking upthe purse, he added, "Take it, I tell you! I give it to you to drink myhealth with."
"In that, my lord duke, you shall be religiously obeyed," Lampourdereplied joyfully; "however, I do not suppose that your highness willobject to my dedicating part of it to lansquenet." And he stretched outhis long arm, seized the purse, and with one dexterous movement, like ajuggler, chucked it jingling into the depths of his pocket.
"It is understood then, my lord duke, that I retire from the affair sofar as the Baron de Sigognac is concerned," continued Lampourde, "but,if agreeable to your highness, it will be taken in hand by my 'alterego,' the Chevalier Malartic, who is worthy to be intrusted with themost delicate and hazardous enterprises, because of his remarkableadroitness and superior ability, and he is one of the best fellowsin the world into the bargain. I had sketched out a scheme for theabduction of the young actress, in whom your highness condescendsto take an interest, which Malartic will now carry out, with all thewonderful perfection of detail that characterizes his clever way ofdoing things. Merindol here, who knows him, will testify to his rarequalifications, my lord duke, and you could not find a better manfor your purpose. I am presenting a real treasure to your lordship intendering Malartic's services. When he is wanted your highness has onlyto send a trusty messenger to mark a cross in chalk on the left-handdoor-post of the Crowned Radish. Malartic will understand, and repair atonce, in proper disguise, to this house, to receive your lordship's lastorders."
Having finished this triumphant address, Maitre Jacquemin Lampourdeagain saluted the duke as before, then put his hat on his head andstalked majestically out of the room, exceedingly well satisfied withhis own eloquence, and what he considered courtly grace, in the presenceof so illustrious a nobleman. His oddity and originality, togetherwith his strange mingling of lofty notions of honour and rascality, hadgreatly amused and interested the young Duke of Vallombreuse, who waseven willing to forgive him for not having despatched de Sigognac; for,if even this famous professional duellist could not get the better ofhim, he really must be invincible, and in consequence the thought of hisown defeat became less galling and intolerable to his pride andvanity. Moreover, he had not been able to get rid of an uncomfortableconsciousness, even in his most angry mood, that his endeavouring tocompass de Sigognac's assassination was rather too great an enormity,not on account of any conscientious scruples, but simply because hisrival was a gentleman; he would not have hesitated a second about havinghalf-a-dozen bourgeois murdered, if they had been rash or unfortunateenough to interfere with him, the blood of such base, ignoblecreature being of no more consequence in his eyes than so muchwater. Vallombreuse would have liked to despatch his enemy himselfin honourable combat, but that was rendered impossible by the baron'ssuperior ability as a swordsman, of which he still had a painfulreminder in his wounded arm; which was scarcely healed yet, and wouldprevent his indulging in anything like a duel for some time to come. Sohis thoughts turned to the abduction of the young actress; a pleasantersubject to dwell upon, as he felt not the slightest doubt that once hehad her to himself, separated from de Sigognac and her companions, shewould not long be able to withstand his eloquent pleading and personalattractions. His self-conceit was boundless, but not much to be wonderedat, considering his invariable and triumphant success in affairs ofgallantry; so, in spite of his recent repulse, he flattered himself thathe only required a fitting opportunity to obtain from Isabelle all thathe desired.
"Let me have her for a few days in some secluded place," said he tohimself, "where she cannot escape from me, or have any intercourse withher friends, and I shall be sure to win her heart. I shall be so kindand good and considerate to her, treat her with so much delicacy anddevotion, that she cannot help feeling grateful to me; and then thetransition to love will be easy and natural. But when once I have wonher, made her wholly mine, then she shall pay dearly for what she hasmade me suffer. Yes, my lady, I mean to have my revenge--you may restassured of that."