No, Pierce, please! I swear—you know I would never…
Lying bitch!
His thick hand on her arm, right where the waiter had been touching her all night. Then a blinding pain and a sickening crack…
“Tess…?” Garron’s voice was worried.
When she opened her eyes, she saw that he had a hand out to her, as though he wanted to comfort her in some way but he didn’t quite dare.
“It’s all right,” she said in a voice that came out hoarse and shaky. She cleared her throat and tried again. “It’s all right. It’s just hard to talk about. He, uh, broke my arm that night. Here.” She pointed to her left forearm, right between the wrist and elbow. “It was just a greenstick fracture—not compound or anything. I had to lie when I went to get the X-ray. I said I fell down the steps…”
“Here?” His fingers brushed her arm just where she had pointed. “This is where he hurt you?”
Tess’s heart skipped a beat for some reason.
“Uh…yes.”
“May I?” He lifted her arm slowly.
“Um…I…I guess.” Now her heart was pounding. What was he going to do?
But Garron simply pressed his lips tenderly to the spot where she had been hurt all those years ago. Tess thought she could almost feel the old break throbbing under his gentle touch. He held the kiss for a long moment and looked up, meeting her eyes with his own. Tess gazed into those clear, blue-green depths, unable to look away as her heart went into overdrive. She could smell his scent again—that rich, masculine spice that seemed to surround him whenever he was having intense emotions.
At last he pulled away and let her arm go.
“Why…why did you do that?” she whispered.
“I don’t know. I wanted to.” He was still looking at her intently, his eyes on fire in the dim room.
“Thank you, I…” Tess cleared her throat, trying to get her scrambled thoughts back in order. “Anyway, that’s why when you came up and that guy was…was touching my hand, I sort of freaked out,” she went on, trying to pretend the tender kiss had never happened. “I mean, I know you’re not Pierce but my first response was—”
“Fear,” Garron finished for her. “And I didn’t help any by going insane with rage and grabbing him by the neck.”
Tess nodded. “Well, yeah.” She sighed. “It’s just…all these things—these fears—I thought I was starting to get over them. But then when he grabbed me again and took me back to his house and…and…” She shook her head. “Well, you know. Anyway, I guess it just brought everything back.”
“That’s understandable.” He nodded. “Forgive me for losing control like I did. Such an emotional outburst is…unpardonable. It’s just…my other…” He shook his head. “My naming day is near and I fear…”
“What?” Tess asked, when he stopped speaking and looked away from her. “What do you fear?”
He shook his head. “You’re braver than me. I can’t even speak my fear aloud. I’m afraid if I do…”
“It might come true.” Tess nodded. “I think I understand.”
Garron closed his eyes tightly for a moment, a look of intense pain crossing his face. “It’s getting harder to control—more difficult to hold back. I don’t know what to do.”
“I…” Tess didn’t know what to say. But suddenly a snatch of the conversation she’d overheard came back to her. “She tames it. I don’t know how she does it but every time she touches me or I touch her—every time her skin comes into contact with mine—I can feel my dr’gin quieting within me. It’s hard to explain but it’s almost as if it likes her.”
Garron’s exact words when he spoke to his brother. And twice he had told her that she calmed the burning in his blood.
Me, she realized. I’m the answer—I can help him.
The question was, did she have the courage to give him what he needed?
It’s wrong…dangerous, whispered the little voice in her head, the voice of self preservation that had come to live inside her when she married Pierce. You shouldn’t…
But it didn’t have to be sexual, did it? Couldn’t it just be…calming? She remembered the way he had hugged her on the Mother Ship. The way he had sat on the edge of the bed and pulled her close, resting his head on her chest as though asking mutely for comfort. Why couldn’t it be like that?
“Garron,” she said softly.
“Yes?” He didn’t look up.
“I think…I think I can help you. If…if you want me to.”
“How?” He looked up at last.
“Like this.” Tess stood and came around to face him. She stepped between his knees and, heart pounding hard, she reached for him.
Garron seemed to hold his breath as she enfolded him, wrapping her arms around his neck and shoulders and pulling him close. The couch was low so his head came to rest right against her breasts. Tess pulled him close anyway, pressing against him. The v-neck of her t-shirt pulled down a little and she felt the scratch of his cheek against the tops of her breasts as he put his arms around her hips and hugged her back.
“Gods,” he muttered hoarsely. “Oh, Tess…”
“It’s all right.” She ran her fingers through his thick, black hair and pressed a kiss to the top of his head. “Everything is going to be all right, Garron. I promise.”
“I hope you’re right. I just…don’t know how.”
“Like this,” she whispered. “Does it…does it help?”
“You know it does.” He looked up at her, his eyes glowing brightly. “Your touch calms the burning…tames the beast within.”
“But not completely,” Tess said, studying his face. “You need more, don’t you?”
“I…” He dropped his eyes. “I cannot ask for more.”
“Yes, you can.” Taking a step back, Tess took his hand and tugged. “Come on.”
“Where are we going?” he asked, getting off the couch.
“To…” Tess took a deep breath. “To the bedroom.”
“But what—?”
“You’ll see.”
Trying to keep her courage up, she lifted her chin and marched down the short hallway to the bedroom with its ridiculous antler bed and plaid bedspread. Taking the handmade quilt that was folded at the foot of the bed, she shook it out and spread it over the garish plaid. There—much better!
Then she started to undress. Off came the baggy t-shirt and down came the loose yoga pants.
“Tess, wait…” Garron sounded uncertain. “What are you doing?”
“Giving you what you need.” She turned to face him in only her bra and panties. Should she take them off as well? Her fingers hovered over the front snap of her bra but in the end she lost her nerve. This would have to do.
“And what…” Garron cleared his throat. “What exactly is it that you think I need?”
“Skin-to-skin contact.” Tess looked him in the eyes. “I have a confession to make—I actually woke up earlier than you thought this morning. I really had to use the restroom so I was going to go but then I heard you talking to someone in there—I guess maybe your brother?”
He groaned. “You heard all that?”
Tess’s heart began to pound. Was he mad?
“I did,” she said steadily. “And I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier.”
“It’s all right.” He shook his head. “I just…didn’t want you to know.”
“I would have put the pieces together anyway,” Tess assured him. “All day you’ve been so tense…so on edge. I didn’t realize it before but this was why, wasn’t it? You’ve been fighting the…the other that lives inside you. The…what did you call it?”
“The dr’gin.” He looked grim. “It has been…especially insistent today. I don’t know how much longer I can hold it off.”
“And what happens if it comes out? Never mind…” Tess held up a hand. “I don’t want to know. Right now what I want is for you to strip. Um, down to your shorts, I mean. If…if you wear shorts?”
He frowned. “I’m not sure what article of clothing you’re talking about. But if you’re asking if I wear anything under my flight leathers, I’m afraid not.”
“Okay, um…” Tess bit her lip. What should she do? It’s not sexual, she told herself firmly. It’s comforting…calming. And completely necessary.
“Tess?” He had already taken off his black t-shirt, baring the most mouthwatering chest she’d ever seen.
She took a deep breath. “Take it off,” she commanded. “Go ahead, take it all off.”
Garron complied, but slowly. “What exactly are we going to do?” he asked as he finished taking off his boots and began unfastening his trousers.
“Nothing sexual,” Tess said quickly. “Just…just hold each other, that’s all.”
“All right.” If he was disappointed, he showed no sign of it. But when he pushed down the tight black leather trousers, his long, thick shaft was more than half erect.
“Oh!” Tess couldn’t stop the gasp that escaped her. He had the most spectacular body she’d ever seen on a guy. Broad shoulders led down to a tan chest and rippling abs that moved like molded steel when he shifted. Long, muscular arms and legs with big, capable hands which she already liked were nice but her eyes kept straying back to his torso. A small trail of black hair led from his belly button down to his… Tess tried not to look but she couldn’t help it. So I was right when I hugged him this morning, she told herself as her eyes flickered over the long, thick shaft. He really is that big. And he isn’t even all the way hard!
“Are you all right? Do you want me to put my leathers back on?” He started to reach for his trousers but Tess shook her head.
“No, no! I just…I’m sorry. You’re just so, um, big…everywhere.”
Garron looked down at himself with a frown.
“I believe my endowment is normal for a Kindred.”
“Well, it’s a lot bigger than normal for a human.” She could feel her cheeks getting hot and she tried again not to look below his waist. “Look, never mind about that. Just get on the bed with me.”
“All right.” He lay down on the bed on his back and looked up at her. “Are you coming?”
Poor choice of words! Tess felt a hysterical bubble of nervous laughter rise in her throat and swallowed it back down with difficulty. She had to get hold of herself now—it was time to do this.
She lowered herself to the bed wearing only her pink lace bra and panties. She supposed she really ought to be naked for this to be true skin-to-skin contact but she just wasn’t quite that brave.
Garron was lying on his back, waiting for her, so she scooted over and put her head on his chest. She could hear his heart, deep and steady, and after a moment, he put an arm around her and drew her closer, so that her entire front was pressed to his long side.
“Mmmm.” Tess dared to rest a hand on his broad chest, between the flat copper disks of his nipples and let his warm, masculine scent envelop her. His skin seemed hot—almost as though he had a fever and she wondered if he was okay. He didn’t seem sick—maybe Kindred just ran hotter than humans. She closed her eyes and tried to relax.
“This is…nice. Comforting.” His voice was a deep rumble in her ear.
“I think so too.” Tess patted his chest lightly. “Is it helping…do you think?”
“Some.” He shifted uncomfortably and she realized something was wrong. “Garron?” She opened her eyes and looked at his face. There was a look almost of pain etched on his chiseled features. A quick glance further down the long, muscular length of his body showed why. He was now fully at attention, his thick shaft achingly hard with a pearly white drop of precum just at the tip. “Garron, honey,” she said hesitantly. “Is this…doing you more harm than good?”
“I don’t know.” He shifted again, as though trying to get comfortable. “Being this close to you with so little between us is just…difficult.”
“I’m so sorry!” Tess was mortified. “I never meant to…to make things worse.” She started to get up but Garron stopped her with a hand on her arm.
“Don’t go.” His eyes blazed in the dim room. “You’re so beautiful you make me ache but it’s a pain I would willingly bear just to be near you.”
“Oh…” Tess felt a flutter around her heart and allowed herself to be drawn down against him again. “All right.”
Garron turned his head and pressed his face to her hair.
“Gods, you smell so damn good,” he muttered. “And you’re so sweet and soft. It’s like I’m holding a lin’del.”
“Um, a what?”
He looked at her. “I think it’s what your people call an angel? An otherworldly creature too beautiful to be real. That’s what I mean.”
“That’s so sweet.” Tess snuggled a little closer to him. “And you smell pretty good yourself. Do you wear some kind of cologne or…?”
“It’s my bonding scent. When a Kindred wants to bind a female to him, his body makes a certain scent to attract her.” He sounded conflicted about it.
“And did…did your body ever make that scent for…” Tess couldn’t say the name.
“For Nella? No.” He sighed. “We were never this close—ever. We barely touched hands and only once or twice touched lips. Our society on Pax did not allow it.”
“So you never got to hug her? Or kiss her?” Tess felt sorry for him now.
“No, though I wanted to badly. We talked about it. We had…many plans for after we mated. But of course…” He left the sentence unfinished.
Tess was sorry she’d brought it up. “I shouldn’t have said anything. It’s obviously a painful subject.”
“Not as much as it used to be.” He cleared his throat. “Maybe that’s…why I seem to have such difficulty keeping my vow.”
“It isn’t breaking your vow to do…what we’re doing,” Tess objected. “I mean, we’re just, uh, lying here. And Nella wouldn’t have wanted you to be in pain or out of control, would she?”
“No…” He didn’t sound completely sure of himself. “I don’t think so.”
“Well, then…” Speaking of him being in pain, she couldn’t help noticing that he was as hard as ever. Her hand, still pressed to his chest, itched to slip down and ease his ache—to explore that hot, hard length she saw throbbing against his flat belly.
What’s wrong with you? whispered a frightened little voice in her head. What are you thinking of? You know that’s wrong…dangerous. It’s exactly what Pierce was always accusing you of doing. Touching another man!
Yes, but despite all the accusations and “punishments” Pierce had subjected her to, she had never once done anything he had accused her of. Besides, he was her ex-husband, even if he wouldn’t sign the divorce papers, and he wasn’t here. Tess wanted to do something to banish him from her life—something she never would have dared to do back when she was with him.
Besides, she told herself firmly. It isn’t sexual. It’s like…therapy. The poor guy needs some help. I’m just going to help him…that’s all.
Slowly, carefully, she let her hand drift down Garron’s chest and torso. His rock hard abs twitched nervously under her fingertips as she slid even lower but he said nothing until she finally wrapped her fingers around his long, thick shaft.
“Tess?” His deep voice was hoarse and uncertain. “What are you doing?”
“Helping you.” He was so thick she couldn’t get her hand all the way around him but she slid her fingers up and down his hot length anyway. It felt like holding a living, pulsing bar of iron in her hand and touching him seemed to make the warm spice he’d called his bonding scent intensify.
“Helping me…what exactly?” He gave a low gasp as her hand reached his broad, flaring crown and then traveled down again to his base.
“Helping you have a release. That was why you went to the Pairing House in the first place, wasn’t it? You needed a release. Only you never got one.” Tess stroked him again, beginning to find a rhythm. “I think if you did you’d feel better??
?more in control.”
He gave a shaky laugh and pumped up into her hand. “You appear to be the one who’s in control, lin’del.”
“I am, aren’t I?” Tess liked the idea. It made her feel strong, powerful…less vulnerable. She had never been in control with Pierce. She’d never been allowed to do anything but lay there and look at the ceiling. Now Garron was lying naked on the bed, his big muscular body spread out just for her like some kind of erotic feast, and he was completely open to her. Touching him like this was a heady experience.
But wouldn’t it be even better, whispered the naughty little voice of Tess BP, wouldn’t it be even nicer to taste him?
The thought gave her a wicked little tingle right between her thighs. Did she dare? She looked at Garron, lying there with his big hands clenched in the quilt on either side, his entire body tense with need. The look of almost pain was back on his face and she wasn’t sure if he was trying to reach a release…or trying to hold it off.
How can you resist? the little voice urged. Besides, you’re helping him—remember? It’s just therapy…
Therapy. Right. Tess knew she shouldn’t and yet…the little voice was right. How could she resist?
Slowly, she pressed a soft kiss to his chest and then moved lower, to kiss his rib cage.
“Tess? Lin’del?” Garron’s eyes—which had been tightly shut—flew open. He looked at her uncertainly as she kissed the hard ridge of muscle right above his hipbone.
“Shhh,” Tess soothed him. Her heart was pounding, but with excitement, not fear—she hadn’t felt so empowered for years.
“But what are you—?”
“This,” she murmured and pressed a soft, gentle kiss to the side of his shaft. Then she looked up at him. “Unless you’d rather I didn’t?”
“It is forbidden.” His breath was coming fast now—his broad chest rising and falling rapidly.
“Then…you want me to stop?” Tess bit her lip and started to pull back.
“No, please…” He shook his head quickly. “That which is forbidden…is desirable. If you truly wish it, I would not…would not stop you.”