CHAPTER XX
They asked us considerable many questions; wanted to know what wecovered up the raft that way for, and laid by in the daytime insteadof running--was Jim a runaway nigger? Says I:
"Goodness sakes! would a runaway nigger run _south?_"
No, they allowed he wouldn't. I had to account for things some way, soI says:
"My folks was living in Pike County, in Missouri, where I was born,and they all died off but me and pa and my brother Ike. Pa, he 'lowedhe'd break up and go down and live with Uncle Ben, who's got a littleone-horse place on the river forty-four mile below Orleans. Pa waspretty poor, and had some debts; so when he'd squared up there warn'tnothing left but sixteen dollars and our nigger, Jim. That warn'tenough to take us fourteen hundred mile, deck passage nor no otherway. Well, when the river rose pa had a streak of luck one day; heketched this piece of a raft; so we reckoned we'd go down to Orleanson it. Pa's luck didn't hold out; a steamboat run over the forrardcorner of the raft one night, and we all went overboard and dove underthe wheel; Jim and me come up all right, but pa was drunk, and Ike wasonly four years old, so they never come up no more. Well, for the nextday or two we had considerable trouble, because people was alwayscoming out in skiffs and trying to take Jim away from me, saying theybelieved he was a runaway nigger. We don't run daytimes no more now;nights they don't bother us."
The duke says:
"Leave me alone to cipher out a way so we can run in the daytime if wewant to. I'll think the thing over--I'll invent a plan that 'll fixit. We'll let it alone for to-day, because of course we don't want togo by that town yonder in daylight--it mightn't be healthy."
Towards night it begun to darken up and look like rain; theheat-lightning was squirting around low down in the sky, and theleaves was beginning to shiver--it was going to be pretty ugly, it waseasy to see that. So the duke and the king went to overhauling ourwigwam, to see what the beds was like. My bed was a straw tick--betterthan Jim's, which was a corn-shuck tick; there's always cobs aroundabout in a shuck tick, and they poke into you and hurt; and when youroll over the dry shucks sound like you was rolling over in a pile ofdead leaves; it makes such a rustling that you wake up. Well, the dukeallowed he would take my bed; but the king allowed he wouldn't. Hesays:
"I should 'a' reckoned the difference in rank would a sejested to youthat a corn-shuck bed warn't just fitten for me to sleep on. YourGrace 'll take the shuck bed yourself."
Jim and me was in a sweat again for a minute, being afraid there wasgoing to be some more trouble amongst them; so we was pretty glad whenthe duke says:
"'Tis my fate to be always ground into the mire under the iron heel ofoppression. Misfortune has broken my once haughty spirit; I yield, Isubmit; 'tis my fate. I am alone in the world--let me suffer; I canbear it."
We got away as soon as it was good and dark. The king told us to standwell out towards the middle of the river, and not show a light till wegot a long ways below the town. We come in sight of the little bunchof lights by and by--that was the town, you know--and slid by, about ahalf a mile out, all right. When we was three-quarters of a mile belowwe hoisted up our signal lantern; and about ten o'clock it come on torain and blow and thunder and lighten like everything; so the kingtold us to both stay on watch till the weather got better; then himand the duke crawled into the wigwam and turned in for the night. Itwas my watch below till twelve, but I wouldn't 'a' turned in anyway ifI'd had a bed, because a body don't see such a storm as that every dayin the week, not by a long sight. My souls, how the wind did screamalong! And every second or two there'd come a glare that lit up thewhite-caps for a half a mile around, and you'd see the islands lookingdusty through the rain, and the trees thrashing around in the wind;then comes a _h-whack!_--bum! bum! bumble-umble-um-bum-bum-bum-bum--andthe thunder would go rumbling and grumbling away, and quit--and then_rip_ comes another flash and another sock-dolager. The waves mostwashed me off the raft sometimes, but I hadn't any clothes on, anddidn't mind. We didn't have no trouble about snags; the lightningwas glaring and flittering around so constant that we could see themplenty soon enough to throw her head this way or that and miss them.
I had the middle watch, you know, but I was pretty sleepy by thattime, so Jim he said he would stand the first half of it for me; hewas always mighty good that way, Jim was. I crawled into the wigwam,but the king and the duke had their legs sprawled around so therewarn't no show for me; so I laid outside--I didn't mind the rain,because it was warm, and the waves warn't running so high now. Abouttwo they come up again, though, and Jim was going to call me; but hechanged his mind, because he reckoned they warn't high enough yet todo any harm; but he was mistaken about that, for pretty soon all of asudden along comes a regular ripper and washed me overboard. It mostkilled Jim a-laughing. He was the easiest nigger to laugh that everwas, anyway.
I took the watch, and Jim he laid down and snored away; and by and bythe storm let up for good and all; and the first cabin-light thatshowed I rousted him out, and we slid the raft into hiding-quartersfor the day.
The king got out an old ratty deck of cards after breakfast, and himand the duke played seven-up awhile, five cents a game. Then they gottired of it, and allowed they would "lay out a campaign," as theycalled it. The duke went down into his carpet-bag, and fetched up alot of little printed bills and read them out loud. One bill said,"The celebrated Dr. Armand de Montalban, of Paris," would "lecture onthe Science of Phrenology" at such and such a place, on the blank dayof blank, at ten cents admission, and "furnish charts of character attwenty-five cents apiece." The duke said that was _him._ In anotherbill he was the "world-renowned Shakespearian tragedian, Garrick theYounger, of Drury Lane, London." In other bills he had a lot of othernames and done other wonderful things, like finding water and goldwith a "divining-rod," "dissipating witch spells," and so on. By andby he says:
"But the histrionic muse is the darling. Have you ever trod theboards, Royalty?"
"No," says the king.
"You shall, then, before you're three days older, Fallen Grandeur,"says the duke. "The first good town we come to we'll hire a hall anddo the swordfight in 'Richard III.' and the balcony scene in 'Romeoand Juliet.' How does that strike you?"
"I'm in, up to the hub, for anything that will pay, Bilgewater; but,you see, I don't know nothing about play-actin', and hain't ever seenmuch of it. I was too small when pap used to have 'em at the palace.Do you reckon you can learn me?"
"Easy!"
"All right. I'm jist a-freezin' for something fresh, anyway. Le'scommence right away."
So the duke he told him all about who Romeo was and who Juliet was,and said he was used to being Romeo, so the king could be Juliet.
"But if Juliet's such a young gal, duke, my peeled head and my whitewhiskers is goin' to look oncommon odd on her, maybe."
"No, don't you worry; these country jakes won't ever think of that.Besides, you know, you'll be in costume, and that makes all thedifference in the world; Juliet's in a balcony, enjoying the moonlightbefore she goes to bed, and she's got on her nightgown and her rufflednightcap. Here are the costumes for the parts."
He got out two or three curtain-calico suits, which he said wasmeedyevil armor for Richard III. and t'other chap, and a long whitecotton nightshirt and a ruffled nightcap to match. The king wassatisfied; so the duke got out his book and read the parts over in themost splendid spread-eagle way, prancing around and acting at the sametime, to show how it had got to be done; then he give the book to theking and told him to get his part by heart.
There was a little one-horse town about three mile down the bend, andafter dinner the duke said he had ciphered out his idea about how torun in daylight without it being dangersome for Jim; so he allowed hewould go down to the town and fix that thing. The king allowed hewould go, too, and see if he couldn't strike something. We was out ofcoffee, so Jim said I better go along with them in the canoe and getsome.
When we got there there warn't nobody stirring; streets empty, andperfectly dead a
nd still, like Sunday. We found a sick nigger sunninghimself in a back yard, and he said everybody that warn't too young ortoo sick or too old was gone to camp-meeting, about two mile back inthe woods. The king got the directions, and allowed he'd go and workthat camp-meeting for all it was worth, and I might go, too.
The duke said what he was after was a printing-office. We found it; alittle bit of a concern, up over a carpenter-shop--carpenters andprinters all gone to the meeting, and no doors locked. It was a dirty,littered-up place, and had ink-marks, and handbills with pictures ofhorses and runaway niggers on them, all over the walls. The duke shedhis coat and said he was all right now. So me and the king lit out forthe camp-meeting.
We got there in about a half an hour fairly dripping, for it was amost awful hot day. There was as much as a thousand people there fromtwenty mile around. The woods was full of teams and wagons, hitchedeverywheres, feeding out of the wagon-troughs and stomping to keep offthe flies. There was sheds made out of poles and roofed over withbranches, where they had lemonade and gingerbread to sell, and pilesof watermelons and green corn and such-like truck.
The preaching was going on under the same kinds of sheds, only theywas bigger and held crowds of people. The benches was made out ofoutside slabs of logs, with holes bored in the round side to drivesticks into for legs. They didn't have no backs. The preachers hadhigh platforms to stand on at one end of the sheds. The women had onsun-bonnets; and some had linsey-woolsey frocks, some gingham ones,and a few of the young ones had on calico. Some of the young men wasbarefooted, and some of the children didn't have on any clothes butjust a tow-linen shirt. Some of the old women was knitting, and someof the young folks was courting on the sly.
The first shed we come to the preacher was lining out a hymn. He linedout two lines, everybody sung it, and it was kind of grand to hear it,there was so many of them and they done it in such a rousing way; thenhe lined out two more for them to sing--and so on. The people woke upmore and more, and sung louder and louder; and towards the end somebegun to groan, and some begun to shout. Then the preacher begun topreach, and begun in earnest, too; and went weaving first to one sideof the platform and then the other, and then a-leaning down over thefront of it, with his arms and his body going all the time, andshouting his words out with all his might; and every now and then hewould hold up his Bible and spread it open, and kind of pass it aroundthis way and that, shouting, "It's the brazen serpent in thewilderness! Look upon it and live!" And people would shout out,"Glory!--A-a-_men_!" And so he went on, and the people groaning andcrying and saying amen:
"Oh, come to the mourners' bench! come, black with sin! (_amen!_)come, sick and sore! (_amen!_) come, lame and halt and blind!(_amen!_) come, pore and needy, sunk in shame! (_a-a-men!_) come, allthat's worn and soiled and suffering!--come with a broken spirit! comewith a contrite heart! come in your rags and sin and dirt! the watersthat cleanse is free, the door of heaven stands open--oh, enter in andbe at rest!" (_a-a-men! glory, glory hallelujah!_)
And so on. You couldn't make out what the preacher said any more, onaccount of the shouting and crying. Folks got up everywheres in thecrowd, and worked their way just by main strength to the mourners'bench, with the tears running down their faces; and when all themourners had got up there to the front benches in a crowd, they sungand shouted and flung themselves down on the straw, just crazy andwild.
Well, the first I knowed the king got a-going, and you could hear himover everybody; and next he went a-charging up onto the platform, andthe preacher he begged him to speak to the people, and he done it. Hetold them he was a pirate--been a pirate for thirty years out in theIndian Ocean--and his crew was thinned out considerable last spring ina fight, and he was home now to take out some fresh men, and thanks togoodness he'd been robbed last night and put ashore off of a steamboatwithout a cent, and he was glad of it; it was the blessedest thingthat ever happened to him, because he was a changed man now, and happyfor the first time in his life; and, poor as he was, he was going tostart right off and work his way back to the Indian Ocean, and put inthe rest of his life trying to turn the pirates into the true path;for he could do it better than anybody else, being acquainted with allpirate crews in that ocean; and though it would take him a long timeto get there without money, he would get there anyway, and every timehe convinced a pirate he would say to him, "Don't you thank me, don'tyou give me no credit; it all belongs to them dear people in Pokevillecamp-meeting, natural brothers and benefactors of the race, and thatdear preacher there, the truest friend a pirate ever had!"
And then he busted into tears, and so did everybody. Then somebodysings out, "Take up a collection for him, take up a collection!" Well,a half a dozen made a jump to do it, but somebody sings out, "Let_him_ pass the hat around!" Then everybody said it, the preacher too.
So the king went all through the crowd with his hat, swabbing hiseyes, and blessing the people and praising them and thanking them forbeing so good to the poor pirates away off there; and every littlewhile the prettiest kind of girls, with the tears running down theircheeks, would up and ask him would he let them kiss him for toremember him by; and he always done it; and some of them he hugged andkissed as many as five or six times--and he was invited to stay aweek; and everybody wanted him to live in their houses, and saidthey'd think it was an honor; but he said as this was the last day ofthe camp-meeting he couldn't do no good, and besides he was in a sweatto get to the Indian Ocean right off and go to work on the pirates.
When we got back to the raft and he come to count up he found he hadcollected eighty-seven dollars and seventy-five cents. And then he hadfetched away a three-gallon jug of whisky, too, that he found under awagon when he was starting home through the woods. The king said, takeit all around, it laid over any day he'd ever put in in themissionarying line. He said it warn't no use talking, heathens don'tamount to shucks alongside of pirates to work a camp-meeting with.
The duke was thinking _he'd_ been doing pretty well till the kingcome to show up, but after that he didn't think so so much. Hehad set up and printed off two little jobs for farmers in thatprinting-office--horse bills--and took the money, four dollars. And hehad got in ten dollars' worth of advertisements for the paper, whichhe said he would put in for four dollars if they would pay inadvance--so they done it. The price of the paper was two dollars ayear, but he took in three subscriptions for half a dollar apiece oncondition of them paying him in advance; they were going to pay incordwood and onions as usual, but he said he had just bought theconcern and knocked down the price as low as he could afford it, andwas going to run it for cash. He set up a little piece of poetry,which he made, himself, out of his own head--three verses--kind ofsweet and saddish--the name of it was, "Yes, crush, cold world, thisbreaking heart"--and he left that all set up and ready to print in thepaper, and didn't charge nothing for it. Well, he took in nine dollarsand a half, and said he'd done a pretty square day's work for it.
Then he showed us another little job he'd printed and hadn't chargedfor, because it was for us. It had a picture of a runaway nigger witha bundle on a stick over his shoulder, and "$200 reward" under it. Thereading was all about Jim and just described him to a dot. It said herun away from St. Jacques's plantation, forty mile below New Orleans,last winter, and likely went north, and whoever would catch him andsend him back he could have the reward and expenses.
"Now," says the duke, "after to-night we can run in the daytime if wewant to. Whenever we see anybody coming we can tie Jim hand and footwith a rope, and lay him in the wigwam and show this handbill and saywe captured him up the river, and were too poor to travel on asteamboat, so we got this little raft on credit from our friends andare going down to get the reward. Handcuffs and chains would lookstill better on Jim, but it wouldn't go well with the story of usbeing so poor. Too much like jewelry. Ropes are the correct thing--wemust preserve the unities, as we say on the boards."
We all said the duke was pretty smart, and there couldn't be notrouble about running daytimes. We judged
we could make miles enoughthat night to get out of the reach of the powwow we reckoned theduke's work in the printing-office was going to make in that littletown; then we could boom right along if we wanted to.
We laid low and kept still, and never shoved out till nearly teno'clock; then we slid by, pretty wide away from the town, and didn'thoist our lantern till we was clear out of sight of it.
When Jim called me to take the watch at four in the morning, he says:
"Huck, does you reck'n we gwyne to run acrost any mo' kings on distrip?"
"No," I says, "I reckon not."
"Well," says he, "dat's all right, den. I doan' mine one er two kings,but dat's enough. Dis one's powerful drunk, en de duke ain' muchbetter."
I found Jim had been trying to get him to talk French, so he couldhear what it was like; but he said he had been in this country solong, and had so much trouble, he'd forgot it.