"Carmen," he said. "You have an extraordinary amount of shit going through your mind. It's like someone gave that big brain of yours a shake and now there are a zillion ideas flying around like confetti." He gave her a kiss on the forehead. "It will just take a little time to settle, sweetheart."
The doorbell rang.
Effortlessly Kurt lifted her off him and placed her on the couch. Then he got up with a big cheeky grin on his face. "Food!" he said happily, and strode off. He came back with a huge paper bag.
"Come into the kitchen with me," he said. "You just gotta love Chinese take away."
Kurt dished out tangerine beef, young chow fried rice, Singapore noodles and vegetable spring rolls. There was even chicken and corn egg drop soup that he put in bowls.
"Can you believe that it is only 1:30 in the afternoon?" Carmen said. "It feels much later."
She was looking through his kitchen cupboards for glasses and giggled when she found a cup that proclaimed: "For a fast erection – call Hi-Rise scaffolding."
Kurt grinned, took it from her hand, and placed it and a glass for himself down on the counter. "I use those scaffold guys a lot. Usually I leave stuff like this at work but this cup cracked me up. What do you want to drink?"
"Just water."
He put water and ice in the cup and glass from his ritzy fridge dispenser and then they sat down, and dug in. Carmen started by sipping the soup right out of her bowl after picking it up with both hands. It tasted divine. She was surprised at how hungry she really was.
Amused, Kurt picked up her spoon and waved it back and forth, raising his eyebrows and grinning.
"I know," she said. "I am terribly uncultured and uncivilized, but I just didn’t feel like using a spoon."
"You're hungry," he excused her. "And we did a lot of stuff this morning." Kurt's cell rang and he picked it up. "Yeah?" he said. "Uh huh. Right. I'll be there in an hour," he said and hung up. "I have to go to a site, sweetheart, and I probably won't get back until six."
"That's okay."
"You could come with me if you don't want to be alone."
"No, I'll be alright."
"Carmen," Kurt said. "You've had a rough day, and a little TLC is required at least until tomorrow. Dr. Nielsen prescribes a hot bath, then a good movie or a good book. After we eat, I'll get you all set up."
"Thor," she giggled. "The 'God of Thunder' and a Doctor? You don’t give a girl a chance do you?"
When they finished eating, Kurt showed her the library and how to work his Kindle. He also explained how to use the spa bath and the entertainment system with the billion or so movies on it. Overwhelmed, Carmen remembered the boredom of her basement dungeon and shook her head at this abundance of possibilities.
Well just look at me now, she thought. Is this too good to be true, or what?
17. Working Gear
Kurt came out of his bedroom dressed for work and Carmen's eyes crossed as her lungs stopped any and all attempt at oxygen transfer. Talk about breathless!
Holy shit.
What was it about a working man that got her so riled up? Was it the big male thing? The muscular, rough and tough "I can bend iron bars with my bare hands" look?
Thor wore faded blue jeans, brown leather work boots, and a thick Wrangler blue cotton button down long-sleeved work shirt that had seen some use already. The man's body alone was compelling; he was so tall with broad shoulders and a perfect chest. Carmen could imagine a tool belt hanging around his narrow hips. Yum.
Kurt walked toward her with his confident, 'I am Captain of the Universe' walk, with his long blond hair around his shoulders, and his green eyes flashing. There was a curious boyish smile playing around his mouth, as if he had a big secret. And those damn dimples! Jesus.
OMFG I want to have sex with him wearing those clothes, Carmen thought, just staring at him – completely mesmerized.
His smile broadened as he stopped right in front of her. Carmen could swear she saw his eyes darken. "You," he said in a low seductive purr, "look like a woman who needs to be fucked."
"It's that outfit," Carmen blurted out. "God damn, Thor, you look amazing."
"If I had time I'd just unzip myself and take you right here, up against this wall."
When Carmen swayed unsteadily at this idea he laughed and put his arm around her. "But I don’t mind leaving you horny, sweetheart," he said. "It will take your mind off things. No masturbating, you have to wait for me, alright?"
She giggled. "But masturbating IS my way of taking my mind off things," she protested.
Kurt took each of her wrists and twisted them roughly behind her back in one sharp, fast move. Stepping in close, he savagely imprisoned her against his hard male body.
She was trapped.
Carmen's breath caught. The fierce animal way he overpowered her made her instantly wet.
Fuck! Genial and good natured or not, Kurt was still an implacable Dom through and through.
"From now on," Kurt said menacingly, staring down at her with hooded eyes, "you only masturbate at my instruction, with me watching."
"Yes, sir," she whispered. Visions of that sexy possibility instantly rolled through Carmen's mind in vibrant Technicolor. It was just as well that Kurt held her so firmly, because she was suddenly weak-kneed.
Clearly conscious of how he had aroused her, Kurt's lips twitched. He walked her to the front door. "I wish I didn't have to go," he said.
Kurt pulled her to him, crushing her body against his own. Then he released her slightly, putting his forehead against hers. Carmen inhaled deeply, just breathing him in. She found this shared intimacy of his a comforting gesture.
"Right now you are completely safe. You have nothing to worry about, okay?"
"Okay."
"I know what you were afraid to tell me, about your time as a sex slave," he said. "It didn’t frighten me off."
"You don’t know everything," she said biting her lower lip, still worried.
"I don’t have to know everything," he said. "I already know you. You'll tell me sometime when you're ready, and it won't make a bit of difference. I'll still want you."
Carmen couldn't help it, she was anxious. A slutty and scarred ex sex slave, and the beautiful Thor the 'God of Thunder.' He was so perfect and she was so flawed. How could that possibly work? Why would he want her?
Kurt's pulled away from her and his blond brows furrowed in a frown. He could probably feel anxiety coming off her in waves.
"Carmen, Carmen, Carmen," he said giving her a little squeeze as he looked down at her. His firm, flat stomach felt rock-hard against her body. "You have to keep your eye on the big picture here, alright? A crazy upbringing with a sociopathic brother, and four months abducted by an asshole isn’t the big picture. The big picture is that I have found you. We have found each other."
There was wonder in Kurt's expression and Carmen thought he was staring at her as if he might devour her. "I swear that I have never been so happy in my life," he said. "You are the one for me, Carmen. That isn't going to change."
Wow. The warm bubble of joy that exploded inside her after that little speech was devastating. Carmen's eyes stung and welled and she began to cry.
Kurt swore and held her tighter. "Those are happy tears, right?"
She sniffed and gave a sobbing half laugh. "Right," she agreed, pulling back a little to wipe her eyes with her fingers. "I'm just a little emotional. It's been a big day and I am crazy in love with you, Kurt Nielsen."
"I love you, too," he said, running his hands through her hair. "I wish I didn’t have to go," he said again.
He tilted her face up and Carmen just stared. Carmen loved looking at him. Man he was beautiful. There was a tiny bit of stubble coming up on his jaw, and those green eyes always took her breath away.
He was warm and fiercely protective and he smelled all male. Kurt kissed her goodbye, a sweet tender press of lips.
"I'll be home as soon as possible," he said. "TLC, gorgeous, and that's an order. Enjoy your
bath."
~~~
Carmen got a text from Kurt that he wouldn't be home until after seven, but he'd bring dinner. He brought pizza and beer, but because Carmen wasn't much into beer, he opened a bottle of classy red wine for her.
He also handed her two dozen red roses with a kiss. "These are for you," he said
No one had ever given her flowers before. Carmen, who always lived on the breadline, couldn't help but hear a voice in the back of her mind tell her that it was a foolish waste of money. Money meant nothing to Kurt – he had tons of it. Yet it was a thoughtful gift.
Red roses, she thought. They are a common gesture of love given from a man to a woman. And look at me - I'm giddy as a school girl with her first crush. Underneath everything - there I am, a "normal" girl after all.
Together they ate, watched some TV, and they cuddled and talked. Carmen couldn’t believe how kind and attentive Kurt was.
Exhausted, they went to bed early, but Kurt made no demands. He was affectionate, and Carmen began to worry that he didn't find her attractive now that he knew about her time with Robert Ellis.
When Carmen found herself closing up, Kurt nagged this foolish fear out of her. Then he laughed so hard that she began to feel a little silly.
"You are so strong, Carmen, and so amazing," he said, propped up on one elbow as he lay beside her on the bed. "Everything that happened today made me feel a kind of wonder. How did I get so lucky? You are a miracle. I don’t even feel like dominating you, tonight. What I feel like doing is simply holding you close and loving you with all my heart."
Between the roses and that earnest statement, Carmen really lost it, weeping like a child with uncontrollable happy tears.
In the end they made love together in Kurt's big bed. Sex was slow and easy, graced with murmurs of tenderness. The way he touched her made her feel beautiful, valued and cherished. Kurt did dominate her in the end, it was his natural inclination to do so, but he was so damn sweet about it that Carmen just had to smile.
They surged together in his soft cotton sheets, the sound of their ragged breaths loud in the quiet of his bedroom.
Ever aware of her, Kurt felt her draw close and told her to come for him. When they climaxed, they released together.
18. Kurt's Ex-Girlfriend
Kurt's computer flagged everything that mentioned his name or the name of his construction company.
Thus when Carmen opened his lap-top and checked the morning news on-line, she saw the nasty little article in the 'New York Daily News' gossip column. It slammed Kurt Nielsen for his violent behavior toward women, and with spiteful innuendo it questioned whether he had substance abuse issues.
"Many sources report that….bla, bla, bla."
What a total load of bullshit!
The article made Carmen furious. In the righteous, riled up vengeful state she was in, it wasn't a good idea for anyone to make her mad.
Strangely her fury on behalf of Kurt was much greater than the anger she had felt for her own betrayal by the DEA. Now why was that? Carmen wanted to fix everything for Kurt. No she needed to fix it.
It was the least she could do after all he had done for her.
Kurt had left in a 7am start for work, but had told Carmen that his sister, Stella was coming to pick her up and take her shopping today. Carmen needed lots of new clothes, he said, and his little sister loved to shop. They would get on so well together, he assured her, two of his most favorite people in the world. He also left her $1000 and his charge card and told her they could call him if there were any problems. Kurt said he would call later and they could all meet for lunch around 1pm.
In his own way, Kurt was like a whirlwind, flying Carmen like a piece of straw off into places unknown. What could she do about it? There was no point in arguing with a force of nature after all.
When Stella arrived, Carmen was on the phone, but she let her in with a smile and raised her finger to tell her she would be just a minute.
Carmen grinned at Kurt's little sister.
She was tall, probably 5'-10", long-legged and slim. She had long blonde hair, of course, with dark blue eyes and a saucy mischievous smile. Stella was dressed in a chic youthful style with a deep purple pleated skirt, black thigh-high leggings with black ankle boots, and a black sweater with a golden cuffed blouse underneath, accenting her wrists and neck, as well as the beautiful blonde hair. A black super wide belt finished the look. It had bling on it spelling out the words "City Chic" in big gold letters.
She looked like a fashion model that had just stepped off a catwalk.
Stella had a wide innocent smile, and she seemed absolutely elated to be here. Even though Stella was two years older than Carmen, to Carmen she seemed very young.
Was it that protected upbringing? Living in an open, trusting environment and knowing her older brother loved her, so that Stella felt safe perhaps?
Stella gave Carmen a big happy hug once she was off the phone.
"It's so great to meet you, Carmen," Stella gushed without a single emotional barrier to be found. "My God you are so pretty! Wow, what a figure. I wish I had boobs, but you're so little!" she rattled on. "You know my brother is completely nuts over you, don't you? And he has gotten you to move in already? Wow, well he has never done that before, not even with Laura. He has been having such a terrible time with all this violence crap in the media and it just makes me so angry!"
Carmen couldn’t stop smiling. She and Stella were going to get along perfectly. And why wouldn’t they? They both adored Kurt.
They sat down in the kitchen and Carmen made coffee, while listening to Stella talk. Man, it was fun to hear her run on about inconsequential things. It was like something Carmen had seen on TV, two women chatting over coffee. It made Carmen almost feel like a regular girl.
Sitting beside her, Carmen bumped her shoulders with Stella. "I have a plan," she said. "Is your heart set on shopping?"
Stella frowned doubtfully, and her big blue eyes looked troubled. "You don’t want to shop? Kurt was pretty keen on me taking you out. What did you want to do instead?"
Carmen smiled. "I want to pay a visit to Kurt's ex-girlfriend, Laura."
~~~
Laura Thomas was in New York's Presbyterian University Hospital. Carmen, wise in the ways of all things sneaky, paid one of the Spanish speaking cleaners to get her a uniform and borrowed her ID for an hour.
As luck would have it, Carmen found Laura alone in her room, sitting on her bed.
Laura was a willowy sort of creature, tall, super slim, blonde and blue-eyed. She was seriously way too skinny. Had she recently lost weight? Probably she had from all this stress. Laura was the type of girl that a man would instinctively want to protect. The young woman was seriously beautiful in a vulnerable, wan, sad sort of way.
Carmen could imagine men falling all over themselves while throwing their coats down in puddles for her to walk over.
"Hi," Carmen said coming in and shutting the door.
"Hi," Laura replied back, with a perplexed look on her face.
"Oh, I'm not really a cleaner," Carmen explained, using her most endearing 'trust me' expression. "I snuck in here. I came in kind of undercover, because the press is all over this shit. I am here for Kurt Nielsen."
"You are?" Laura gasped. "Really?"
Carmen crossed her heart. "True story."
Laura got all teary.
"Hey," Carmen said, handing her a box of tissues and sitting down next to her on the bed. "You know that he has told me all about you?" she said. "He doesn't blame you, Laura. Kurt says the whole thing is your mother's fault."
Laura brightened. "Really?"
"Well, it wasn't your idea was it?"
"No!" Laura said. "I wish I hadn’t gone along with her."
It was like a flood, or a tsunami. Laura Thomas poured out her story, and from Carmen's point of view it was a kind of common one in the general scheme of things. Laura was the only child of a single parent, a parent that simply took
over Laura's life from time to time. From the moment Laura learned to talk, her mother had told her what to say. Apparently once her mother got an idea, she ran with it.
Laura's mother constantly told Laura both subtly and openly that Laura was hopeless and useless and that she basically couldn't manage in life without her mother's guidance. Poor Laura had such low self-confidence that she doubted her own ability to make her own decisions.
A person tends to believe whatever is repeated over and over, whether it is true or not.
Carmen knew this intimately.
Carmen fought with her own mind as she constantly tended to beat herself up with negative internal mental comments like: "I am so stupid," and various other self flagellation mantras. That was bad enough, but it must have been even worse for Laura. A sweet sensitive sort of girl like Laura could easily be confounded by a confident and overwhelming personality like her mother appeared to be.
"I tried to explain to my mother that I told Kurt to use a belt," she said. "I like a hard spanking."
Carmen giggled. "What's not to like about a hard spanking?"
"Oh," Laura said brightening. "You understand."
"Totally."
"Somehow when she is hammering away at me, I just kind of cave," Laura said. "Everything she says just seems so reasonable. My mother explained that 'there are always two sides to every story.' Mother told me that even though I wanted it, Kurt was wrong to do it. She wouldn’t let me speak to my lawyer, she did all the talking. Honestly, it is so difficult to cross her. She scares me."
"I hate that expression," Carmen said. "There are two sides to every story," as if that explains and justifies everything. You know what I say when someone tells me that?"
"No," said Laura.
"I say, well of course! There are two sides to every story… and one side is WRONG!"
The two women giggled like school children over that, and Carmen found herself really liking Laura Thomas. She could see what Kurt had seen in her. Carmen had experienced a difficult upbringing, that was true, but you know what? It seemed to Carmen that rich or poor, with a family, or orphaned, street smart or naive, everybody had a hard time. There were so many ways to take a wrong turn. Life was tricky for everyone.