man. To kiss him once more. To tell him that he was confused
and a little frightened by what he was feeling, and to talk to
him about it. Normally when Vic wanted to talk about
something Shane was the one he called up. Who was he
supposed to call and talk to about this?
Shane was asleep once more, and Vic finally let his body
relax a little. He closed his eyes, trying to will himself not to
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think about this situation. Even thoughts that made his heart
ache about Owen’s unreturned feelings were better than the
confusion he was feeling toward Shane right now. Vic opened
his eyes and blinked up at the dark ceiling, thinking of Owen
and frowning a little. Did this mean he was finally moving on a
little? Did the fact that he was beginning to lust after Shane
like this mean that maybe he really could break free from
Owen’s spell after all these years?
Shane sighed heavily in his sleep and shifted slightly, and
his hand that had been dangling off the side of Vic’s body
reached out as he stretched, the fingers brushing over the palm
of Vic’s right hand and then entwining themselves between
Vic’s own fingers.
Vic gasped a little at the unexpected touch, and he
thought back on the three levels of pleasure he had made up to
explain his attractions to Owen. Physical, emotional, and
painful. It hit him then, that his requirements for emotional
pleasure—the comfortable silences, the long talks into the
night, the affectionate words and now, finally, the unconscious
need to be touched even in sleep—, he felt them all from Shane.
Those had always been missing from Owen, unless the younger
man was feeling particularly affectionate or lost, but with
Shane they had always been there. Offered freely without any
sort of demands made in return other than reciprocation.
Vic’s heart felt as if it were beating in his throat as he
thought about their ability to sit and watch the sun set without
speaking. Perhaps that was where he had gone wrong with
Owen. He had simply had the levels wrong. The emotional
pleasure, it was supposed to come before the physical, not after
it. He and Shane already shared that emotional bond that he
and Owen had never quite been able to form, though he was
almost certain that neither of them had intended for it to go
further than friendship. Now, though, now the physical aspect
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was definitely playing a part, and it hit Vic suddenly that if he
kissed Shane again, he would be kissed back.
He wondered briefly if he were also to love Shane… would
he be loved back?
His fingers closed over Shane’s and he brushed his
fingertips over the back of Shane’s hand. He bit his lip as
Shane moved his head and nuzzled into the pillow beneath
him, pulling Vic closer as he tried to get comfortable. Life was
full of uncertainty, Vic knew that. His love life especially had
been full of heartache and disappointments, unrequited love
reinforced by brief, wonderful moments of tenderness.
A lot of things in life were uncertain, but Vic knew one
thing was certain right then. He shook his shoulder a little,
nudging Shane and waking the other man. Shane inhaled
quickly through his nose, surprised to be ripped from sleep
again so soon, and he raised his head quickly to look at Vic in
groggy concern.
“What’s wrong?” he asked in a rough whisper.
Vic turned a little in Shane’s arms, keeping hold of the
man’s hand as Shane tried to pull away and give him room to
move. He swallowed nervously and blinked rapidly at Shane in
the moonlight.
“I was wondering if I was right,” he said softly.
“What?” Shane asked in sleepy confusion.
“I was thinking that if I kissed you again, I would be kissed
back,” Vic told him, turning completely until he and Shane
were facing each other. He pushed up onto his elbow and
looked down at Shane. “Would I be kissed back?” he asked
after a stunned silence, his curiosity and need and possibly a
little bit of the beer overriding any embarrassment.
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Shane didn’t answer, and Vic could tell that the other man
was holding his breath now. He leaned his head forward slowly,
giving Shane the chance to back away if he so desired, and
when Shane remained where he was, Vic pressed their mouths
together chastely.
Shane froze as they made contact, and Vic’s heart
practically stopped as he waited for a response. Shane inhaled
deeply through his nose and pressed forward, parting his lips
and letting his tongue glide over Vic’s before deepening the kiss
and pulling Vic to him with the hand that had yet to release
Vic’s shoulder.
They twined slowly together, all thoughts leaving Vic’s
mind save for the need to get closer. He just needed to touch,
to taste. He needed Shane to devour him and hold him close all
night, and for him to still be there in the morning when Vic
awoke.
They parted breathlessly, Vic’s heart beating loudly in his
ears and Shane’s breaths coming in ragged gasps as they
clutched each other. “That…,” Shane gasped, running the side
of his nose against Vic’s affectionately and nuzzling him. “That
answer your question?” he asked breathlessly.
“More,” Vic responded in the same breathless tone, the
excitement of newfound contact making his normal brain
function slightly difficult. Shane kissed him again, pressing
into him until Vic was once again on his back and Shane was
hovering over him, kissing him gently as he settled his body
halfway on top of Vic’s.
Vic moaned in encouragement and let his free hand wrap
over Shane’s back, and he realized with something like a thrill
of pleasure that Shane’s hand still held his own. Their fingers
were entwined still, and even as Vic took note of it, Shane
shifted his arm and brought Vic’s hand up slowly, pressing it
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finally into the mattress beside Vic’s head and pinning him
there gently.
“I had no idea you…,” Vic gasped with difficulty as Shane
finally shifted his kisses to Vic’s chin and then the tender skin
of his neck. He closed his eyes and tried to slow his breathing
as Shane’s breath gusted over his sweaty skin, and he tilted his
head back to give the other man better access.
Shane took hold of the collar of Vic’s shirt with difficulty,
his hand reaching up from beneath Vic’s neck, and he pulled it
down and to the side in order to give him access to more skin.
Vic groaned a little as the material bit into the other side of his
neck and Shane’s arm muscles flexed beneath him.
“I had no idea,” he continued roughly, desperate to fill the
silence for some reason. “If I’d known—”
“Vic,” Shane whispered as he cease
d his attentions to Vic’s
collarbone and raised his head.
“Hmm?” Vic responded dazedly as he looked up at the
other man in the soft moonlight.
“Stop talking,” Shane whispered, his voice gruff and
affectionate.
Vic pressed his lips together and snorted quietly, and
Shane kissed him once more, so gently that his lips just barely
rested against Vic’s before the kiss deepened again. Vic found
that he could barely breathe.
Shane’s fingers trailed past the back of his neck as the
other man pulled his arm from beneath Vic’s body in order to
prop himself up. “You talk entirely too much,” Shane
murmured in between kisses.
“And you don’t talk nearly enough,” Vic told him, the last
word cut off by Shane’s lips meeting his hungrily once more.
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“Later,” Shane whispered demandingly as he shifted his
body to cover more of Vic’s, and Vic instinctively lifted one leg
and hooked it over Shane’s hip.
The kisses continued, and Vic slowly began to realize
exactly what they were doing. Thoughts of friendships being
ruined and comfortable silences being dashed to bits screamed
through Vic’s mind briefly, but as Shane’s hand came up to
cup the side of his face and then moved up to thread lightly
through his hair, Vic realized that he wasn’t actually afraid of
that happening.
Shane groaned softly and let his hands come to rest on
Vic’s hips, his fingers sliding under Vic’s T-shirt. “It’s been… a
while,” he murmured.
“Like riding a bike,” Vic joked with a grin as he pulled at
Shane’s shirt. Shane sat up and yanked it over his head, then
immediately pulled Vic’s off as well and tossed them both to the
ground.
“You said you wanted me,” Vic reminded him in a low
voice as his hand trailed through the light fuzz on Shane’s
chest and down further, purposely bypassing his cock to glide
under the material of his boxers and across the tender skin of
his thigh and hip.
Shane’s grip on Vic’s hips tightened almost painfully and
he groaned. It was exciting and nerve-wracking, but Vic didn’t
want it to stop.
“Yes,” Shane answered with a hiss. “I don’t want to hurt
you, though,” he said with difficulty.
“You won’t,” Vic said confidently. “Did you pack condoms
with you?” Vic asked dubiously. Vic knew he hadn’t packed
any, knowing it would be just the two of them in a fairly remote
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location. He had never dreamed he and Shane would ever be
this intimate.
“In the drawer,” Shane mumbled as he kissed Vic hungrily
and pinned him against the mattress. He kissed him again and
then pushed away from him, rolling off the bed and stepping
away. “Get that off,” he said with a gesture to Vic’s boxers as he
went to his bureau and began to dig in one of the top drawers.
Vic hurried to obey, his stomach tumbling nervously as he
thought about what they were about to do. He was about to
fuck Shane. His best friend Shane. Even after the intimacy
they’d already shared, it still boggled his mind a little.
Shane turned back around and looked at Vic with a little
grin, a condom in one hand as he shucked his own boxers.
Vic’s breath hitched excitedly. Yeah, this felt right. He was
about to fuck Shane. And it felt really fucking right.
“Find a date on that,” Shane ordered with a little laugh as
he tossed the condom at Vic like a Frisbee and went into the
bathroom. “Been in there for fucking ever,” he said in a muffled
voice as Vic snickered quietly.
“Get the body wash,” Vic ordered as he squinted in the
moonlight that streamed through the windows, trying to read
the little date on the pack. “2010,” he read happily. “Damn,
Shane, don’t these things last like, decades?” he teased.
Shane poked his head around the corner of the doorframe
and raised an eyebrow.
“I’m being good,” Vic said instantly, not liking the evil glint
he could see in Shane’s eye.
“You look good too,” Shane growled as he walked back out
with a bottle of body wash in his hand. “You sure you can
handle it with just this?” he asked skeptically as he held up the
body wash.
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“I’m quite skilled,” Vic said cheekily as he reclined on the
mattress and watched Shane as the man looked him over.
There was nothing quite so erotic, in Vic’s opinion, as watching
someone else as desire lit up their eyes and made them burn
for you. There was nothing quite so sexy as seeing someone
else want you like Shane wanted Vic right then. “Come on,” Vic
whispered as he pushed himself into the center of the bed and
rested back on his elbows. He hoped Shane could see the same
desire in him, because Vic was certainly feeling it.
Shane moved forward, tossing the bottle onto the bed and
crawling slowly until he settled between Vic’s legs. He hovered
over Vic, looking down at him and breathing shallowly. “You’re
sure?” he asked one last time. “I don’t want to hurt you at all.”
Vic smiled reassuringly and said, “One of us’ll get hurt if
you don’t get on with it.”
Shane took his sweet time about it despite Vic’s threats,
pleas, and shameless moans, though Vic wasn’t really
complaining since, despite the other man’s protests about
being out of practice, Shane obviously knew exactly what he
was doing. By the time he sat back to roll the condom on, Vic
was clutching at the sheets and panting, biting his tongue to
keep himself from demanding to be fucked right that instant.
He wanted Shane inside him, but he also wanted it to last as
long as it could.
Shane leaned over him, kissing him passionately as he
guided the head of his cock to rest against Vic. He continued to
kiss Vic as he rocked gently, putting more and more pressure
on the muscles with each rocking motion and stimulating them
beyond anything Vic had experienced in quite some time. He
wasn’t as promiscuous as he had been in his youth, and he
rarely bottomed anymore save for with Owen, who never did
anything slowly like Shane was now doing. Vic clutched at the
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other man, moaning appreciatively into his mouth as the
stimulation continued.
“Ready?” Shane asked huskily as he pressed their
foreheads together and his breath gusted across Vic’s face.
“Fuck yes,” Vic answered eagerly, his stomach flipping
once more as he thought about just who exactly he was doing
this with. “Shane,” he moaned wantonly as Shane pushed
carefully into him, loving how it felt to say it and groaning in
ecstasy at the overwhelmed sound Shane made in return.
Shane’s breath came in short pants as he tried to go
slowly and allow for V
ic to adjust to the intrusion, and when
the burn finally ebbed, Vic turned his head and bit Shane’s
ear, tightening his muscles to indicate that he was just fine,
thank you, and to get on with the fucking.
“God, yes,” Shane breathed as he started an agonizingly
slow rhythm, pulling out almost completely before slowly
pushing back in. Vic moaned helplessly and his back arched in
pleasure, and Shane reached down and hooked his elbow
under Vic’s knee, pulling Vic’s leg up and changing the angle of
his thrusts so that it made Vic cry out unintelligibly. “Vic,”
Shane gasped desperately against the moist skin of Vic’s neck
as he quickened his pace.
“Oh, fuck yeah,” Vic managed to respond, though his brain
was slowly short-circuiting and his body screamed that it liked
Shane’s attentions a lot.
Shane’s panting breaths came in Vic’s ear as Vic’s own
labored gasps were forced out of him by every thrust. He
turned his head, inhaling the scent of the other man and
forever ingraining the smell in his brain as the one that smelled
of sex. Nothing else would ever again come close, Vic knew.
Shane’s body tightened above him, holding him close and
pressing into him as he murmured words into Vic’s ear. Words
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that made Vic’s heart thud in his chest and his cock throb with
the need for release.
“Holy fuck, Shane,” Vic managed through labored gasps.
Shane’s free hand slid up the mattress to tangle in Vic’s
hair and hold him still, stopping the rocking that Vic’s body
had been doing with each thrust and making Shane’s cock
drive even deeper.
“God, yes!” Vic shouted as Shane pushed deeper and
deeper into him. He couldn’t breathe, save for the occasional
gasp that was forced out by his struggling lungs, and his
stomach muscles clenched almost painfully with the strain of
keeping his hips off the mattress as Shane rocked into him.
“Vic,” Shane hissed into his ear, sending thrills through
Vic’s body. Rarely did he hear his name said with such
desperate passion. Shane continued, his thrusts slowing as he
tried to hold off.