“Then you will henceforth wear clothing appropriate to your status. No tight binding around chest or butt.”
“Appropriate clothing,” she agreed, defeated. Her dress became two sizes larger, so that it was no longer tight.
“You flirted shamelessly with Cyrus, who was trying to be true to the code,” Stymy continued inexorably. “When that didn’t work, you took naughtiness to a new level. No one has done that before. You should be excruciatingly ashamed.”
“Well, he called me a child!” she retorted.
“Not any more,” Cyrus said, hoping to pacify her before she damaged her case. At least she hadn’t mentioned spanking.
“You used magic to invoke a technicality of age, and shamelessly seduced him,” Stymy said. “Thus signaling us to deliver your baby”
“Yes,” she agreed smugly. “They’re both wonderful.”
“You must now renounce them both, and promise never to do it again. Not until you have aged naturally to maturity in six years”
She exploded, outraged. “The bleep I will! I love him! And my daughter too! I won’t renounce anything! I’m glad I did it!”
Cyrus exchanged a horrified glance with Kadence, seeing the case abruptly lost.
But the stork wasn’t fazed. “Do you not realize that you have brought a child into this realm who can not share a normal family life with you or her father? This is bad for her upbringing and social adjustment. You have made a man love you who can not marry you. This is bad for his sanity”
Rhythm froze. “Oh, I’m sorry! I didn’t think of that.”
“A child wouldn’t. That’s why cautionary rules exist.”
“I can get along,” Kadence said bravely.
“So can I,” Cyrus said, though it really bothered him.
“Neither of you should be required to sacrifice in this manner,” Stymy said. “You need to have a normal family life. Her action caused you to forfeit it”
Rhythm burst into tears. “I never meant to do that! If I have to, to make it right, I’ll give you up. Maybe you can marry someone else, Cyrus, and adopt Kadence. Then you’ll have a family.”
“No!” Cyrus and Kadence said together.
“But it’s not right to make you suffer. I alone should suffer for my naughtiness”
Cyrus hugged her from one side, and Kadence from the other. “We’d rather suffer with you, than without you,” Cyrus said.
Rhythm tried to speak again, but was choked off by tears.
“Fortunately you have one significant thing in your favor, Princess,” the stork said, as they sat sharing their misery.
“I do?” Rhythm asked, soggily surprised.
“Love, as you said. It conquers all. Even on occasion the Adult Conspiracy. We are required to compromise.”
“You are?” Cyrus asked, hardly daring to believe it.
“It was in the nature of a test question. True love brooks no opposition. Therefore we will accept the status quo, except that we will ignore any signals we may receive from Princess Rhythm, regardless of her temporary age, until she comes of age naturally.”
“But what about the family?” Kadence asked.
“This is unfortunate,” Stymy said. “We hope that the troupe represents a feasible substitute. It allows you to interact frequently, and the members are supportive of each other. The three of you know your relationship, so you can act as a family when alone together. As I said, it is a compromise”
But now Cyrus was suspicious. “Why should you compromise? It can’t be just that there is love.”
“There are two other factors,” Stymy agreed. “All of you are needed for the completion of your private mission.”
“You know about that?” Cyrus asked sharply.
“Only that it is of vital importance to the larger welfare of Xanth, so we must not interfere. The Good Magician put out the word”
Now Rhythm spoke. “What’s the other thing?”
“It is somewhat personal,” the stork agreed reluctantly. “Punishing you would also compromise me, for making the delivery. I should have checked the situation more carefully. I much prefer that no issue be made. It could cost me my position”
Oho! Cyrus had to bite his tongue to keep from chortling.
“We won’t tell if you don’t,” Rhythm said, amused but serious.
“I believe we have an understanding,” Stymy said, his beak making a wry curve.
“Silence all around,” Cyrus said, immensely relieved.
“Let’s get out of here,” Kadence said. “Before anyone changes their mind.”
“That does seem best,” the stork agreed.
Outside the Stork Works, on their way back, Rhythm thought of something else. “That silence includes you,” she reminded Kadence. “In case you should accidentally see anything at night you shouldn’t. Because we aren’t going to let you be by yourself. Not while something is out to get you.”
“Aw, you’ll both be covered by a blanket anyway,” the girl said. “It never shows anything”
Cyrus and Rhythm exchanged half a guilty look. It was definitely time to move on.
“Now we need to retrace our route, so I can pick up Me-lete,” Cyrus said.
“Gee—can we visit the merfolk again?” Kadence asked brightly.
“I will make a Find spell that will guide us directly to it,” Rhythm said with half a shudder. “No need to visit the mer-folk”
Cyrus didn’t comment. They all knew that the threat to Kadence had not been the mers’ fault, but it remained a bad memory.
The Find spell showed the direction, which wasn’t exactly the way they had come. Actually they had not passed this way at all; Rhythm had transported them. It also tried to lead them through the worst of thickets, so they couldn’t go straight.
They walked along any enchanted paths they found, but few folk traveled to and from the Stork Works by foot, and the paths did not always go the direction they needed. So as night approached they looked for a safe spot to camp.
“We are close to Melete,” Rhythm said. “Which is odd.”
“Odd? Why?”
“Because we are nowhere near where we left her”
He did not like that. “Do you think this is more of the mischief we have been encountering?”
“It may be,” she said grimly.
“But you can protect us, Mother,” Kadence said, sounding not quite certain.
“She can protect us,” Cyrus said reassuringly.
There was a peal of thunder. A thunderstorm was brewing. “Fracto has seen us,” Rhythm said. “He’s going to wet on us if he can.”
“There’s a cave,” Kadence said.
“My Writer’s Block is in there, or beyond it in that direction,” Cyrus said, surprised.
“I will check it.” Rhythm went to the mouth of the cave. “Hello in there. Are there any monsters or dangerous creatures lurking?”
“I am the only occupant,” a nymphly voice replied. “I’m a Lady.”
“She’s telling the truth,” Rhythm said. “I don’t have the energy to do a full check. It should be all right”
The first drops of water spattered around them, encouraging their entry. They walked into the cave, which was of goodly diameter. They turned a corner, where faint light leaked around.
And came up against the snout of a fire- breathing dragon. “Uh- oh,” Rhythm murmured as her drum and drumsticks appeared.
“Do not be alarmed,” the Dragon Lady said. “I am not going to scorch you. You sounded like nice people, so I invited you in. I never toast a visitor”
So it seemed. “I am Cyrus Cyborg, and this is Rhyme, and her little sister Kadence.” He was not completely easy with the deception, but it was for a necessary cause.
“I am so glad to meet you.”
“You talk like a nymph,” Kadence said, surprised.
The Lady smiled, the expression rippling from one side of her long toothy mouth to the other. “I had a nymph as a roommate for some time. Sh
e taught me how to talk human style, and I taught her how to chomp a fresh man. It seemed like a fair exchange. She finally got lonely for her own kind, leaving me lonely for company. But local folk don’t quite trust me, for some reason.”
“She is telling the truth,” Rhythm repeated. “We can trust her not to scorch or eat us.”
“Ah, that’s your talent,” the Lady said. “To ascertain truth.”
“Part of it,” Rhythm agreed cautiously.
“You must be hungry after traveling. I have assor ted roasts, and some baked potatoes and bread.” She looked apologetic. “Everything is hot; it’s my nature. You will have to go outside for cool drinks.”
“I’ll fetch some,” Kadence said eagerly. She dashed outside the cave.
“I also have warm pillows,” the Lady said.
“We’ll make do,” Cyrus said. He pondered brief ly, then decided to ask. “We are searching for a certain wooden block, and understand it is in the cave. Have you seen it?”
“This block?” the Lady asked, lifting it in a curl of her tail.
“Get me out of this!” Melete called. “She’s a nice dragon, but I can’t help her.”
“That block,” Cyrus agreed. “I am a playwright, and that is my Writer’s Block. I can’t write at all well without it. In fact I am stymied on a play now.” The word reminded him of Stymy Stork. “May I have it back?”
“Certainly.” The tail swung around, delivering the Block. “I found it on the branch of a tree, and it intrigued me, as I recognized its nature, so I brought it home. But it doesn’t work for me, perhaps because I am not a writer.”
“It will work only for me,” Cyrus said. “Thank you for returning it. Is there any favor I can do you in exchange?”
“I hesitate to ask. I have a dream.”
“A familiar dream,” Melete said. “She’s a young female.”
“You want to be an actress!” Rhythm exclaimed.
“I blush to confess it. But other dragons aren’t interested in that sort of thing, and most humans won’t trust me close enough to ascertain my ability. I even tried to query the Curse Fiends, but they cursed me away”
It was an easy decision. “You returned my Block. I will write you into the next play.”
“Oh, thank you! I am so grateful.”
“However, you will have to come join my troupe,” Cyrus said. “And not eat any of the actors.”
“Cross my tail and hope to fry,” the Lady said in an evident oath. “This is so exciting.”
“I will get on it the moment we return safely.”
“May I ask a personal question? I do not wish to be offensive.”
“Ask,” Cyrus said, suspecting what was coming.
“The girl resembles you, Rhyme. You introduced her as your sister, and perhaps she is. But the two of you are clearly in love, yet you look to be only about twelve, Rhyme. This close to the Stork Works—well, I suspect your story is somewhat more interesting than merely being tourists”
Cyrus saw Rhythm doing a quick mental calculation. He knew she wanted to invoke the Decade spell and be with him, but couldn’t do that with an intelligent dragon watching. Unless the dragon agreed not to tell. “Will you keep a secret? A big one?”
“Cross my tail and hope to fry myself to a cinder,” the Lady agreed solemnly.
“Cyrus and I are in love, yes. I was naughty, and we got a daughter. We had to explain to the storks. Now we can’t love each other openly, but I can invoke a spell to make me older. Do you mind?”
“Mind? I am in love with love! Especially forbidden love.
I dream of finding it some day myself. But male dragons aren’t much into nymph- talking females, except as a staple of their diets. Do anything you want; I won’t tell”
Kadence returned, somewhat wet, with three mugs of drinks. “These were all I could find close by the cave.”
“Oh, those are rums,” the Lady said.
“Rum!” Rhythm said. “You can’t drink that!”
“Neither can you,” Cyrus told her.
“Oh, yeah?” She brought out the Decade spell and invoked it before he could protest. Her loose dress became tight in places before she remembered and changed its size.
“Now that’s an impressive transformation,” the Lady said. “But about that rum: I see one of them is a Deco. Kadence could sip that without being adversely affected.”
“I’m thirsty,” Kadence said.
“Oh, drink the Decorum, then,” Rhythm said petulantly. She took one of the others from the girl’s hands and sipped it. “This is fantastic.”
“That’s Fulc rum,” the Lady said. “It generally serves as the turning point of evening festivities.”
“That’s for me.” Rhythm took a big sip.
Cyrus took the third one. “That is Cereb,” the lady said. “Be careful; it goes to your head.”
“Cerebrum,” he agreed, trying it. Indeed, he felt smarter already.
“Let’s get turning,” Rhythm said, almost slopping her rum as she tried to embrace him.
“You are being disgustingly obvious, Mother,” Kadence complained.
The Lady smiled. “Come dear; we shall play a game of nineteen questions while they do what we have no notion about”
Cyrus was getting to like the dragon. He gulped down the rest of his mind- enhancing drink, and Rhythm finished hers, and they embraced. In the background they heard Kadence and the Lady playing the game of questions.
Once the intensity of the ellipsis wore off, Rhythm spoke. “Are you really going to write her into a play?”
“Of course. I think it would be nice to have a play with a genuine dragon in it.”
“But what about the night mare you were thinking of?”
“This is better.”
“Much better,” Melete agreed.
Then they slept, carefully doing it before the Decade spell wore off so that they could lie together embraced without doing anything contrary to the Adult Conspiracy. Actually the Conspiracy was wearing rather thin, but they pretended not to notice.
And, lying embraced, with Melete back, Cyrus dreamed creatively and romantically.
John was lonely. So when he learned that he could participate in a vast communal programmed dream populated by other lonely folk, he was happy to do it. He took a Happy Dreams pill and lay down on his bed to sleep.
Soon he found himself in a pleasant dreamscape, a scene set on the surface of a giant floating cloud, where trees grew, rivers ran, and nothing bad ever happened. People were everywhere, playing games, eating meals, and dating. All of them were quite attractive, so that he hesitated to approach them, because he was distinctly ordinary.
A handsome, friendly looking man approached him. “You’re new here,” the man said.
“I just arrived,” John agreed. “How did you know?”
“Because you’re just a blob of vapor.” The man held up a mirror.
John looked at himself. He was a blob of vapor. “Oops. I didn’t realize. I thought I would just be myself.”
“No. You can be anything except yourself. That’s the rule”
“But how can I be anything other than myself?”
“You need an Avatar.”
“A what?”
“An image, a personality, that others can see and hear and interact with. It can be anything you want. Most folk want to be handsome, beautiful, noble, wealthy, what ever. Choose, and it shall be so. Then you can interact with others on an equal basis.”
“But in real life I’m not like that.”
“No one here is. That’s the point: here you must be what you want to be. Everyone is.”
“That doesn’t seem very realistic”
The man looked at him condescendingly. “Realism is hardly the point. This is a dream”
So it was. “Thank you,” John said. “I’d just like to be moderately tolerably handsome. Nothing special.”
“That’s too close to your real nature. Try again.”
“How do you know my real nature?”
“I’m in your dream, remember. Now try to take this more seriously.”
“I am taking it seriously. I never wanted to be more than I am. I just want to be accepted for what I am. And I’m ordinary.”
“Bad attitude,” the man said, and drifted away.
So John formed a modest Avatar somewhat but not perfectly similar to himself and walked on, uncertain whether he really liked this dream. If he couldn’t be himself in his own dream, what was the point?
A pretty young woman approached him. “May I talk to you?” she asked.
“Sure,” he said, gratified that he wasn’t being ignored. “I’m John.”
“I’m Marsha. I noticed that you gave the dream monitor a hard time.”
“I didn’t mean to. I just wanted to be myself”
“Why?”
“Because if I’m no good as myself, I’m no good as a faked-up Avatar. Maybe that’s a stupid reason.”
“No, no, it’s a great reason. I wish I had thought of it. Then I would have been different.”
“But you look and sound fine.”
“Yes, but it’s fake. I’m nothing at all like this in real life. I capitulated to the requirement, and made myself—” She shrugged. “Like this”
So she was another ordinary person. “You’re welcome to be what ever you want to be. I don’t hold it against you.”
“Oh, thank you!” she said, and impulsively kissed him.
He reeled and almost fell. She had to hold him tight to keep him standing. “Sorry,” he gasped. “I—no girl ever kissed me like that before.”
“I apologize. I just got carried away. I won’t do it again.”
“No, no, no, no! I liked it. I’m just surprised that you did it. I’m so ordinary.”
“You liked it?” she asked. “May I do it again?”
“Uh, sure, if you really want to”
She wrapped her arms about him, pressed her nice body close to his, and kissed him passionately. He reeled again, but couldn’t fall as long as she was holding him so firmly. “Oh, this is so much fun!” she said, and kissed him yet again.
“Yes!” he agreed, and kissed her back.
After that, one thing led to another, and they found themselves in a miniature dream castle that formed around them, providing them privacy from other Dreamers. Soon they were both naked and trying to see how many storks they could signal with a single effort.