Chapter 27

  Mr Haredale stood in the widow's parlour with the door-key in his hand,gazing by turns at Mr Chester and at Gabriel Varden, and occasionallyglancing downward at the key as in the hope that of its own accordit would unlock the mystery; until Mr Chester, putting on his hat andgloves, and sweetly inquiring whether they were walking in the samedirection, recalled him to himself.

  'No,' he said. 'Our roads diverge--widely, as you know. For the present,I shall remain here.'

  'You will be hipped, Haredale; you will be miserable, melancholy,utterly wretched,' returned the other. 'It's a place of the very lastdescription for a man of your temper. I know it will make you verymiserable.'

  'Let it,' said Mr Haredale, sitting down; 'and thrive upon the thought.Good night!'

  Feigning to be wholly unconscious of the abrupt wave of the hand whichrendered this farewell tantamount to a dismissal, Mr Chester retortedwith a bland and heartfelt benediction, and inquired of Gabriel in whatdirection HE was going.

  'Yours, sir, would be too much honour for the like of me,' replied thelocksmith, hesitating.

  'I wish you to remain here a little while, Varden,' said Mr Haredale,without looking towards them. 'I have a word or two to say to you.'

  'I will not intrude upon your conference another moment,' said MrChester with inconceivable politeness. 'May it be satisfactory to youboth! God bless you!' So saying, and bestowing upon the locksmith a mostrefulgent smile, he left them.

  'A deplorably constituted creature, that rugged person,' he said, ashe walked along the street; 'he is an atrocity that carries its ownpunishment along with it--a bear that gnaws himself. And here is oneof the inestimable advantages of having a perfect command over one'sinclinations. I have been tempted in these two short interviews, to drawupon that fellow, fifty times. Five men in six would have yielded to theimpulse. By suppressing mine, I wound him deeper and more keenly than ifI were the best swordsman in all Europe, and he the worst. You are thewise man's very last resource,' he said, tapping the hilt of his weapon;'we can but appeal to you when all else is said and done. To come to youbefore, and thereby spare our adversaries so much, is a barbarian modeof warfare, quite unworthy of any man with the remotest pretensions todelicacy of feeling, or refinement.'

  He smiled so very pleasantly as he communed with himself after thismanner, that a beggar was emboldened to follow for alms, and to doghis footsteps for some distance. He was gratified by the circumstance,feeling it complimentary to his power of feature, and as a rewardsuffered the man to follow him until he called a chair, when hegraciously dismissed him with a fervent blessing.

  'Which is as easy as cursing,' he wisely added, as he took his seat,'and more becoming to the face.--To Clerkenwell, my good creatures, ifyou please!' The chairmen were rendered quite vivacious by having such acourteous burden, and to Clerkenwell they went at a fair round trot.

  Alighting at a certain point he had indicated to them upon the road, andpaying them something less than they expected from a fare of such gentlespeech, he turned into the street in which the locksmith dwelt, andpresently stood beneath the shadow of the Golden Key. Mr Tappertit, whowas hard at work by lamplight, in a corner of the workshop, remainedunconscious of his presence until a hand upon his shoulder made himstart and turn his head.

  'Industry,' said Mr Chester, 'is the soul of business, and the keystoneof prosperity. Mr Tappertit, I shall expect you to invite me to dinnerwhen you are Lord Mayor of London.'

  'Sir,' returned the 'prentice, laying down his hammer, and rubbinghis nose on the back of a very sooty hand, 'I scorn the Lord Mayor andeverything that belongs to him. We must have another state of society,sir, before you catch me being Lord Mayor. How de do, sir?'

  'The better, Mr Tappertit, for looking into your ingenuous face oncemore. I hope you are well.'

  'I am as well, sir,' said Sim, standing up to get nearer to his ear, andwhispering hoarsely, 'as any man can be under the aggrawations to whichI am exposed. My life's a burden to me. If it wasn't for wengeance, I'dplay at pitch and toss with it on the losing hazard.'

  'Is Mrs Varden at home?' said Mr Chester.

  'Sir,' returned Sim, eyeing him over with a look of concentratedexpression,--'she is. Did you wish to see her?'

  Mr Chester nodded.

  'Then come this way, sir,' said Sim, wiping his face upon his apron.'Follow me, sir.--Would you permit me to whisper in your ear, one half asecond?'

  'By all means.'

  Mr Tappertit raised himself on tiptoe, applied his lips to Mr Chester'sear, drew back his head without saying anything, looked hard athim, applied them to his ear again, again drew back, and finallywhispered--'The name is Joseph Willet. Hush! I say no more.'

  Having said that much, he beckoned the visitor with a mysterious aspectto follow him to the parlour-door, where he announced him in the voiceof a gentleman-usher. 'Mr Chester.'

  'And not Mr Ed'dard, mind,' said Sim, looking into the door again, andadding this by way of postscript in his own person; 'it's his father.'

  'But do not let his father,' said Mr Chester, advancing hat in hand, ashe observed the effect of this last explanatory announcement, 'do notlet his father be any check or restraint on your domestic occupations,Miss Varden.'

  'Oh! Now! There! An't I always a-saying it!' exclaimed Miggs, clappingher hands. 'If he an't been and took Missis for her own daughter. Well,she DO look like it, that she do. Only think of that, mim!'

  'Is it possible,' said Mr Chester in his softest tones, 'that this isMrs Varden! I am amazed. That is not your daughter, Mrs Varden? No, no.Your sister.'

  'My daughter, indeed, sir,' returned Mrs V., blushing with greatjuvenility.

  'Ah, Mrs Varden!' cried the visitor. 'Ah, ma'am--humanity is indeed ahappy lot, when we can repeat ourselves in others, and still be youngas they. You must allow me to salute you--the custom of the country, mydear madam--your daughter too.'

  Dolly showed some reluctance to perform this ceremony, but was sharplyreproved by Mrs Varden, who insisted on her undergoing it that minute.For pride, she said with great severity, was one of the seven deadlysins, and humility and lowliness of heart were virtues. Wherefore shedesired that Dolly would be kissed immediately, on pain of her justdispleasure; at the same time giving her to understand that whatevershe saw her mother do, she might safely do herself, without being at thetrouble of any reasoning or reflection on the subject--which, indeed,was offensive and undutiful, and in direct contravention of the churchcatechism.

  Thus admonished, Dolly complied, though by no means willingly; for therewas a broad, bold look of admiration in Mr Chester's face, refined andpolished though it sought to be, which distressed her very much. As shestood with downcast eyes, not liking to look up and meet his, he gazedupon her with an approving air, and then turned to her mother.

  'My friend Gabriel (whose acquaintance I only made this very evening)should be a happy man, Mrs Varden.'

  'Ah!' sighed Mrs V., shaking her head.

  'Ah!' echoed Miggs.

  'Is that the case?' said Mr Chester, compassionately. 'Dear me!'

  'Master has no intentions, sir,' murmured Miggs as she sidled up to him,'but to be as grateful as his natur will let him, for everythink he ownswhich it is in his powers to appreciate. But we never, sir'--said Miggs,looking sideways at Mrs Varden, and interlarding her discourse with asigh--'we never know the full value of SOME wines and fig-trees till welose 'em. So much the worse, sir, for them as has the slighting of 'emon their consciences when they're gone to be in full blow elsewhere.'And Miss Miggs cast up her eyes to signify where that might be.

  As Mrs Varden distinctly heard, and was intended to hear, all that Miggssaid, and as these words appeared to convey in metaphorical terms apresage or foreboding that she would at some early period droop beneathher trials and take an easy flight towards the stars, she immediatelybegan to languish, and taking a volume of the Manual from a neighbouringtable, leant her arm upon it as though she were Hope and that herAnchor. Mr Che
ster perceiving this, and seeing how the volume waslettered on the back, took it gently from her hand, and turned thefluttering leaves.

  'My favourite book, dear madam. How often, how very often in his earlylife--before he can remember'--(this clause was strictly true) 'have Ideduced little easy moral lessons from its pages, for my dear son Ned!You know Ned?'

  Mrs Varden had that honour, and a fine affable young gentleman he was.

  'You're a mother, Mrs Varden,' said Mr Chester, taking a pinch of snuff,'and you know what I, as a father, feel, when he is praised. He gives mesome uneasiness--much uneasiness--he's of a roving nature, ma'am--fromflower to flower--from sweet to sweet--but his is the butterfly time oflife, and we must not be hard upon such trifling.'

  He glanced at Dolly. She was attending evidently to what he said. Justwhat he desired!

  'The only thing I object to in this little trait of Ned's, is,' said MrChester, '--and the mention of his name reminds me, by the way, that Iam about to beg the favour of a minute's talk with you alone--the onlything I object to in it, is, that it DOES partake of insincerity. Now,however I may attempt to disguise the fact from myself in my affectionfor Ned, still I always revert to this--that if we are not sincere, weare nothing. Nothing upon earth. Let us be sincere, my dear madam--'

  '--and Protestant,' murmured Mrs Varden.

  '--and Protestant above all things. Let us be sincere and Protestant,strictly moral, strictly just (though always with a leaning towardsmercy), strictly honest, and strictly true, and we gain--it is a slightpoint, certainly, but still it is something tangible; we throw up agroundwork and foundation, so to speak, of goodness, on which we mayafterwards erect some worthy superstructure.'

  Now, to be sure, Mrs Varden thought, here is a perfect character. Hereis a meek, righteous, thoroughgoing Christian, who, having mastered allthese qualities, so difficult of attainment; who, having dropped a pinchof salt on the tails of all the cardinal virtues, and caught them everyone; makes light of their possession, and pants for more morality. Forthe good woman never doubted (as many good men and women never do), thatthis slighting kind of profession, this setting so little store by greatmatters, this seeming to say, 'I am not proud, I am what you hear, but Iconsider myself no better than other people; let us change the subject,pray'--was perfectly genuine and true. He so contrived it, and saidit in that way that it appeared to have been forced from him, and itseffect was marvellous.

  Aware of the impression he had made--few men were quicker than he atsuch discoveries--Mr Chester followed up the blow by propounding certainvirtuous maxims, somewhat vague and general in their nature, doubtless,and occasionally partaking of the character of truisms, worn a littleout at elbow, but delivered in so charming a voice and with suchuncommon serenity and peace of mind, that they answered as well as thebest. Nor is this to be wondered at; for as hollow vessels produce a farmore musical sound in falling than those which are substantial, so itwill oftentimes be found that sentiments which have nothing in them makethe loudest ringing in the world, and are the most relished.

  Mr Chester, with the volume gently extended in one hand, and withthe other planted lightly on his breast, talked to them in the mostdelicious manner possible; and quite enchanted all his hearers,notwithstanding their conflicting interests and thoughts. Even Dolly,who, between his keen regards and her eyeing over by Mr Tappertit, wasput quite out of countenance, could not help owning within herself thathe was the sweetest-spoken gentleman she had ever seen. Even Miss Miggs,who was divided between admiration of Mr Chester and a mortal jealousyof her young mistress, had sufficient leisure to be propitiated. EvenMr Tappertit, though occupied as we have seen in gazing at his heart'sdelight, could not wholly divert his thoughts from the voice of theother charmer. Mrs Varden, to her own private thinking, had never beenso improved in all her life; and when Mr Chester, rising and cravingpermission to speak with her apart, took her by the hand and led her atarm's length upstairs to the best sitting-room, she almost deemed himsomething more than human.

  'Dear madam,' he said, pressing her hand delicately to his lips; 'beseated.'

  Mrs Varden called up quite a courtly air, and became seated.

  'You guess my object?' said Mr Chester, drawing a chair towards her.'You divine my purpose? I am an affectionate parent, my dear MrsVarden.'

  'That I am sure you are, sir,' said Mrs V.

  'Thank you,' returned Mr Chester, tapping his snuff-box lid. 'Heavymoral responsibilities rest with parents, Mrs Varden.'

  Mrs Varden slightly raised her hands, shook her head, and looked at theground as though she saw straight through the globe, out at the otherend, and into the immensity of space beyond.

  'I may confide in you,' said Mr Chester, 'without reserve. I lovemy son, ma'am, dearly; and loving him as I do, I would save him fromworking certain misery. You know of his attachment to Miss Haredale.You have abetted him in it, and very kind of you it was to do so. I amdeeply obliged to you--most deeply obliged to you--for your interest inhis behalf; but my dear ma'am, it is a mistaken one, I do assure you.'

  Mrs Varden stammered that she was sorry--

  'Sorry, my dear ma'am,' he interposed. 'Never be sorry for what is sovery amiable, so very good in intention, so perfectly like yourself. Butthere are grave and weighty reasons, pressing family considerations, andapart even from these, points of religious difference, which interposethemselves, and render their union impossible; utterly im-possible.I should have mentioned these circumstances to your husband; but hehas--you will excuse my saying this so freely--he has NOT your quicknessof apprehension or depth of moral sense. What an extremely airy housethis is, and how beautifully kept! For one like myself--a widower solong--these tokens of female care and superintendence have inexpressiblecharms.'

  Mrs Varden began to think (she scarcely knew why) that the young MrChester must be in the wrong and the old Mr Chester must be in theright.

  'My son Ned,' resumed her tempter with his most winning air, 'has had, Iam told, your lovely daughter's aid, and your open-hearted husband's.'

  '--Much more than mine, sir,' said Mrs Varden; 'a great deal more. Ihave often had my doubts. It's a--'

  'A bad example,' suggested Mr Chester. 'It is. No doubt it is. Yourdaughter is at that age when to set before her an encouragement foryoung persons to rebel against their parents on this most importantpoint, is particularly injudicious. You are quite right. I ought to havethought of that myself, but it escaped me, I confess--so far superiorare your sex to ours, dear madam, in point of penetration and sagacity.'

  Mrs Varden looked as wise as if she had really said something to deservethis compliment--firmly believed she had, in short--and her faith in herown shrewdness increased considerably.

  'My dear ma'am,' said Mr Chester, 'you embolden me to be plain withyou. My son and I are at variance on this point. The young lady and hernatural guardian differ upon it, also. And the closing point is, that myson is bound by his duty to me, by his honour, by every solemn tie andobligation, to marry some one else.'

  'Engaged to marry another lady!' quoth Mrs Varden, holding up her hands.

  'My dear madam, brought up, educated, and trained, expressly for thatpurpose. Expressly for that purpose.--Miss Haredale, I am told, is avery charming creature.'

  'I am her foster-mother, and should know--the best young lady in theworld,' said Mrs Varden.

  'I have not the smallest doubt of it. I am sure she is. And you, whohave stood in that tender relation towards her, are bound to consult herhappiness. Now, can I--as I have said to Haredale, who quite agrees--canI possibly stand by, and suffer her to throw herself away (although sheIS of a Catholic family), upon a young fellow who, as yet, has no heartat all? It is no imputation upon him to say he has not, because youngmen who have plunged deeply into the frivolities and conventionalitiesof society, very seldom have. Their hearts never grow, my dear ma'am,till after thirty. I don't believe, no, I do NOT believe, that I had anyheart myself when I was Ned's age.'

  'Oh sir,' said Mrs
Varden, 'I think you must have had. It's impossiblethat you, who have so much now, can ever have been without any.'

  'I hope,' he answered, shrugging his shoulders meekly, 'I have a little;I hope, a very little--Heaven knows! But to return to Ned; I have nodoubt you thought, and therefore interfered benevolently in his behalf,that I objected to Miss Haredale. How very natural! My dear madam, Iobject to him--to him--emphatically to Ned himself.'

  Mrs Varden was perfectly aghast at the disclosure.

  'He has, if he honourably fulfils this solemn obligation of which I havetold you--and he must be honourable, dear Mrs Varden, or he is no sonof mine--a fortune within his reach. He is of most expensive, ruinouslyexpensive habits; and if, in a moment of caprice and wilfulness, hewere to marry this young lady, and so deprive himself of the meansof gratifying the tastes to which he has been so long accustomed, hewould--my dear madam, he would break the gentle creature's heart. MrsVarden, my good lady, my dear soul, I put it to you--is such a sacrificeto be endured? Is the female heart a thing to be trifled with in thisway? Ask your own, my dear madam. Ask your own, I beseech you.'

  'Truly,' thought Mrs Varden, 'this gentleman is a saint. But,' she addedaloud, and not unnaturally, 'if you take Miss Emma's lover away, sir,what becomes of the poor thing's heart then?'

  'The very point,' said Mr Chester, not at all abashed, 'to which Iwished to lead you. A marriage with my son, whom I should be compelledto disown, would be followed by years of misery; they would beseparated, my dear madam, in a twelvemonth. To break off thisattachment, which is more fancied than real, as you and I know verywell, will cost the dear girl but a few tears, and she is happy again.Take the case of your own daughter, the young lady downstairs, who isyour breathing image'--Mrs Varden coughed and simpered--'there is ayoung man (I am sorry to say, a dissolute fellow, of veryindifferent character) of whom I have heard Ned speak--Bullet wasit--Pullet--Mullet--'

  'There is a young man of the name of Joseph Willet, sir,' said MrsVarden, folding her hands loftily.

  'That's he,' cried Mr Chester. 'Suppose this Joseph Willet now, were toaspire to the affections of your charming daughter, and were to engagethem.'

  'It would be like his impudence,' interposed Mrs Varden, bridling, 'todare to think of such a thing!'

  'My dear madam, that's the whole case. I know it would be like hisimpudence. It is like Ned's impudence to do as he has done; but youwould not on that account, or because of a few tears from your beautifuldaughter, refrain from checking their inclinations in their birth. Imeant to have reasoned thus with your husband when I saw him at MrsRudge's this evening--'

  'My husband,' said Mrs Varden, interposing with emotion, 'would be agreat deal better at home than going to Mrs Rudge's so often. I don'tknow what he does there. I don't see what occasion he has to busyhimself in her affairs at all, sir.'

  'If I don't appear to express my concurrence in those last sentiments ofyours,' returned Mr Chester, 'quite so strongly as you might desire,it is because his being there, my dear madam, and not provingconversational, led me hither, and procured me the happiness ofthis interview with one, in whom the whole management, conduct, andprosperity of her family are centred, I perceive.'

  With that he took Mrs Varden's hand again, and having pressed it to hislips with the highflown gallantry of the day--a little burlesquedto render it the more striking in the good lady's unaccustomedeyes--proceeded in the same strain of mingled sophistry, cajolery,and flattery, to entreat that her utmost influence might be exerted torestrain her husband and daughter from any further promotion of Edward'ssuit to Miss Haredale, and from aiding or abetting either party in anyway. Mrs Varden was but a woman, and had her share of vanity, obstinacy,and love of power. She entered into a secret treaty of alliance,offensive and defensive, with her insinuating visitor; and really didbelieve, as many others would have done who saw and heard him, that inso doing she furthered the ends of truth, justice, and morality, in avery uncommon degree.

  Overjoyed by the success of his negotiation, and mightily amused withinhimself, Mr Chester conducted her downstairs in the same state asbefore; and having repeated the previous ceremony of salutation, whichalso as before comprehended Dolly, took his leave; first completing theconquest of Miss Miggs's heart, by inquiring if 'this young lady' wouldlight him to the door.

  'Oh, mim,' said Miggs, returning with the candle. 'Oh gracious me, mim,there's a gentleman! Was there ever such an angel to talk as he is--andsuch a sweet-looking man! So upright and noble, that he seems to despisethe very ground he walks on; and yet so mild and condescending, thathe seems to say "but I will take notice on it too." And to think ofhis taking you for Miss Dolly, and Miss Dolly for your sister--Oh, mygoodness me, if I was master wouldn't I be jealous of him!'

  Mrs Varden reproved her handmaid for this vain-speaking; but very gentlyand mildly--quite smilingly indeed--remarking that she was a foolish,giddy, light-headed girl, whose spirits carried her beyond all bounds,and who didn't mean half she said, or she would be quite angry with her.

  'For my part,' said Dolly, in a thoughtful manner, 'I half believe MrChester is something like Miggs in that respect. For all his politenessand pleasant speaking, I am pretty sure he was making game of us, morethan once.'

  'If you venture to say such a thing again, and to speak ill of peoplebehind their backs in my presence, miss,' said Mrs Varden, 'I shallinsist upon your taking a candle and going to bed directly. How dareyou, Dolly? I'm astonished at you. The rudeness of your whole behaviourthis evening has been disgraceful. Did anybody ever hear,' cried theenraged matron, bursting into tears, 'of a daughter telling her ownmother she has been made game of!'

  What a very uncertain temper Mrs Varden's was!