Chapter 39

  The applause which the performance of Hugh and his new friend elicitedfrom the company at The Boot, had not yet subsided, and the two dancerswere still panting from their exertions, which had been of a ratherextreme and violent character, when the party was reinforced by thearrival of some more guests, who, being a detachment of United Bulldogs,were received with very flattering marks of distinction and respect.

  The leader of this small party--for, including himself, they were butthree in number--was our old acquaintance, Mr Tappertit, who seemed,physically speaking, to have grown smaller with years (particularly asto his legs, which were stupendously little), but who, in a moral pointof view, in personal dignity and self-esteem, had swelled into a giant.Nor was it by any means difficult for the most unobservant person todetect this state of feeling in the quondam 'prentice, for it not onlyproclaimed itself impressively and beyond mistake in his majesticwalk and kindling eye, but found a striking means of revelation in histurned-up nose, which scouted all things of earth with deep disdain, andsought communion with its kindred skies.

  Mr Tappertit, as chief or captain of the Bulldogs, was attended by histwo lieutenants; one, the tall comrade of his younger life; the other, a'Prentice Knight in days of yore--Mark Gilbert, bound in the olden timeto Thomas Curzon of the Golden Fleece. These gentlemen, like himself,were now emancipated from their 'prentice thraldom, and served asjourneymen; but they were, in humble emulation of his great example,bold and daring spirits, and aspired to a distinguished state in greatpolitical events. Hence their connection with the Protestant Associationof England, sanctioned by the name of Lord George Gordon; and hencetheir present visit to The Boot.

  'Gentlemen!' said Mr Tappertit, taking off his hat as a great generalmight in addressing his troops. 'Well met. My lord does me and you thehonour to send his compliments per self.'

  'You've seen my lord too, have you?' said Dennis. 'I see him thisafternoon.'

  'My duty called me to the Lobby when our shop shut up; and I saw himthere, sir,' Mr Tappertit replied, as he and his lieutenants took theirseats. 'How do YOU do?'

  'Lively, master, lively,' said the fellow. 'Here's a new brother,regularly put down in black and white by Muster Gashford; a credit tothe cause; one of the stick-at-nothing sort; one arter my own heart.D'ye see him? Has he got the looks of a man that'll do, do you think?'he cried, as he slapped Hugh on the back.

  'Looks or no looks,' said Hugh, with a drunken flourish of his arm, 'I'mthe man you want. I hate the Papists, every one of 'em. They hate me andI hate them. They do me all the harm they can, and I'll do them all theharm I can. Hurrah!'

  'Was there ever,' said Dennis, looking round the room, when the echoof his boisterous voice bad died away; 'was there ever such a game boy!Why, I mean to say, brothers, that if Muster Gashford had gone a hundredmile and got together fifty men of the common run, they wouldn't havebeen worth this one.'

  The greater part of the company implicitly subscribed to thisopinion, and testified their faith in Hugh by nods and looks of greatsignificance. Mr Tappertit sat and contemplated him for a long time insilence, as if he suspended his judgment; then drew a little nearer tohim, and eyed him over more carefully; then went close up to him, andtook him apart into a dark corner.

  'I say,' he began, with a thoughtful brow, 'haven't I seen you before?'

  'It's like you may,' said Hugh, in his careless way. 'I don't know;shouldn't wonder.'

  'No, but it's very easily settled,' returned Sim. 'Look at me. Did youever see ME before? You wouldn't be likely to forget it, you know, ifyou ever did. Look at me. Don't be afraid; I won't do you any harm. Takea good look--steady now.'

  The encouraging way in which Mr Tappertit made this request, andcoupled it with an assurance that he needn't be frightened, amused Hughmightily--so much indeed, that he saw nothing at all of the small manbefore him, through closing his eyes in a fit of hearty laughter, whichshook his great broad sides until they ached again.

  'Come!' said Mr Tappertit, growing a little impatient under thisdisrespectful treatment. 'Do you know me, feller?'

  'Not I,' cried Hugh. 'Ha ha ha! Not I! But I should like to.'

  'And yet I'd have wagered a seven-shilling piece,' said Mr Tappertit,folding his arms, and confronting him with his legs wide apart andfirmly planted on the ground, 'that you once were hostler at theMaypole.'

  Hugh opened his eyes on hearing this, and looked at him in greatsurprise.

  '--And so you were, too,' said Mr Tappertit, pushing him away with acondescending playfulness. 'When did MY eyes ever deceive--unless it wasa young woman! Don't you know me now?'

  'Why it an't--' Hugh faltered.

  'An't it?' said Mr Tappertit. 'Are you sure of that? You remember G.Varden, don't you?'

  Certainly Hugh did, and he remembered D. Varden too; but that he didn'ttell him.

  'You remember coming down there, before I was out of my time, to askafter a vagabond that had bolted off, and left his disconsolate father aprey to the bitterest emotions, and all the rest of it--don't you?' saidMr Tappertit.

  'Of course I do!' cried Hugh. 'And I saw you there.'

  'Saw me there!' said Mr Tappertit. 'Yes, I should think you did seeme there. The place would be troubled to go on without me. Don't youremember my thinking you liked the vagabond, and on that account goingto quarrel with you; and then finding you detested him worse thanpoison, going to drink with you? Don't you remember that?'

  'To be sure!' cried Hugh.

  'Well! and are you in the same mind now?' said Mr Tappertit.

  'Yes!' roared Hugh.

  'You speak like a man,' said Mr Tappertit, 'and I'll shake hands withyou.' With these conciliatory expressions he suited the action to theword; and Hugh meeting his advances readily, they performed the ceremonywith a show of great heartiness.

  'I find,' said Mr Tappertit, looking round on the assembled guests,'that brother What's-his-name and I are old acquaintance.--You neverheard anything more of that rascal, I suppose, eh?'

  'Not a syllable,' replied Hugh. 'I never want to. I don't believe I evershall. He's dead long ago, I hope.'

  'It's to be hoped, for the sake of mankind in general and the happinessof society, that he is,' said Mr Tappertit, rubbing his palm upon hislegs, and looking at it between whiles. 'Is your other hand at allcleaner? Much the same. Well, I'll owe you another shake. We'll supposeit done, if you've no objection.'

  Hugh laughed again, and with such thorough abandonment to his madhumour, that his limbs seemed dislocated, and his whole frame in dangerof tumbling to pieces; but Mr Tappertit, so far from receiving thisextreme merriment with any irritation, was pleased to regard it with theutmost favour, and even to join in it, so far as one of his gravity andstation could, with any regard to that decency and decorum which men inhigh places are expected to maintain.

  Mr Tappertit did not stop here, as many public characters might havedone, but calling up his brace of lieutenants, introduced Hugh to themwith high commendation; declaring him to be a man who, at such times asthose in which they lived, could not be too much cherished. Further, hedid him the honour to remark, that he would be an acquisition of whicheven the United Bulldogs might be proud; and finding, upon sounding him,that he was quite ready and willing to enter the society (for he wasnot at all particular, and would have leagued himself that night withanything, or anybody, for any purpose whatsoever), caused the necessarypreliminaries to be gone into upon the spot. This tribute to his greatmerit delighted no man more than Mr Dennis, as he himself proclaimedwith several rare and surprising oaths; and indeed it gave unmingledsatisfaction to the whole assembly.

  'Make anything you like of me!' cried Hugh, flourishing the can he hademptied more than once. 'Put me on any duty you please. I'm your man.I'll do it. Here's my captain--here's my leader. Ha ha ha! Let himgive me the word of command, and I'll fight the whole Parliament Housesingle-handed, or set a lighted torch to the King's Throne itself!' Withthat, he smote Mr Tappertit on the back, with such
violence that hislittle body seemed to shrink into a mere nothing; and roared again untilthe very foundlings near at hand were startled in their beds.

  In fact, a sense of something whimsical in their companionship seemed tohave taken entire possession of his rude brain. The bare fact of beingpatronised by a great man whom he could have crushed with one hand,appeared in his eyes so eccentric and humorous, that a kind of ferociousmerriment gained the mastery over him, and quite subdued his brutalnature. He roared and roared again; toasted Mr Tappertit a hundredtimes; declared himself a Bulldog to the core; and vowed to be faithfulto him to the last drop of blood in his veins.

  All these compliments Mr Tappertit received as matters ofcourse--flattering enough in their way, but entirely attributable to hisvast superiority. His dignified self-possession only delighted Hugh themore; and in a word, this giant and dwarf struck up a friendship whichbade fair to be of long continuance, as the one held it to be his rightto command, and the other considered it an exquisite pleasantry toobey. Nor was Hugh by any means a passive follower, who scrupled to actwithout precise and definite orders; for when Mr Tappertit mounted on anempty cask which stood by way of rostrum in the room, and volunteered aspeech upon the alarming crisis then at hand, he placed himself besidethe orator, and though he grinned from ear to ear at every word he said,threw out such expressive hints to scoffers in the management of hiscudgel, that those who were at first the most disposed to interrupt,became remarkably attentive, and were the loudest in their approbation.

  It was not all noise and jest, however, at The Boot, nor were the wholeparty listeners to the speech. There were some men at the other end ofthe room (which was a long, low-roofed chamber) in earnest conversationall the time; and when any of this group went out, fresh people weresure to come in soon afterwards and sit down in their places, as thoughthe others had relieved them on some watch or duty; which it was prettyclear they did, for these changes took place by the clock, at intervalsof half an hour. These persons whispered very much among themselves,and kept aloof, and often looked round, as jealous of their speech beingoverheard; some two or three among them entered in books what seemedto be reports from the others; when they were not thus employed one ofthem would turn to the newspapers which were strewn upon the table,and from the St James's Chronicle, the Herald, Chronicle, or PublicAdvertiser, would read to the rest in a low voice some passage havingreference to the topic in which they were all so deeply interested. Butthe great attraction was a pamphlet called The Thunderer, which espousedtheir own opinions, and was supposed at that time to emanate directlyfrom the Association. This was always in request; and whether readaloud, to an eager knot of listeners, or by some solitary man, wascertain to be followed by stormy talking and excited looks.

  In the midst of all his merriment, and admiration of his captain, Hughwas made sensible by these and other tokens, of the presence of an airof mystery, akin to that which had so much impressed him out of doors.It was impossible to discard a sense that something serious was goingon, and that under the noisy revel of the public-house, there lurkedunseen and dangerous matter. Little affected by this, however, he wasperfectly satisfied with his quarters and would have remained there tillmorning, but that his conductor rose soon after midnight, to go home; MrTappertit following his example, left him no excuse to stay. So they allthree left the house together: roaring a No-Popery song until the fieldsresounded with the dismal noise.

  'Cheer up, captain!' cried Hugh, when they had roared themselves out ofbreath. 'Another stave!'

  Mr Tappertit, nothing loath, began again; and so the three wentstaggering on, arm-in-arm, shouting like madmen, and defying the watchwith great valour. Indeed this did not require any unusual bravery orboldness, as the watchmen of that time, being selected for the officeon account of excessive age and extraordinary infirmity, had a customof shutting themselves up tight in their boxes on the first symptomsof disturbance, and remaining there until they disappeared. In theseproceedings, Mr Dennis, who had a gruff voice and lungs of considerablepower, distinguished himself very much, and acquired great credit withhis two companions.

  'What a queer fellow you are!' said Mr Tappertit. 'You're so precioussly and close. Why don't you ever tell what trade you're of?'

  'Answer the captain instantly,' cried Hugh, beating his hat down on hishead; 'why don't you ever tell what trade you're of?'

  'I'm of as gen-teel a calling, brother, as any man in England--as lighta business as any gentleman could desire.'

  'Was you 'prenticed to it?' asked Mr Tappertit.

  'No. Natural genius,' said Mr Dennis. 'No 'prenticing. It comeby natur'. Muster Gashford knows my calling. Look at that hand ofmine--many and many a job that hand has done, with a neatness anddexterity, never known afore. When I look at that hand,' said MrDennis, shaking it in the air, 'and remember the helegant bits of workit has turned off, I feel quite molloncholy to think it should ever growold and feeble. But sich is life!'

  He heaved a deep sigh as he indulged in these reflections, and puttinghis fingers with an absent air on Hugh's throat, and particularly underhis left ear, as if he were studying the anatomical development of thatpart of his frame, shook his head in a despondent manner and actuallyshed tears.

  'You're a kind of artist, I suppose--eh!' said Mr Tappertit.

  'Yes,' rejoined Dennis; 'yes--I may call myself a artist--a fancyworkman--art improves natur'--that's my motto.'

  'And what do you call this?' said Mr Tappertit taking his stick out ofhis hand.

  'That's my portrait atop,' Dennis replied; 'd'ye think it's like?'

  'Why--it's a little too handsome,' said Mr Tappertit. 'Who did it? You?'

  'I!' repeated Dennis, gazing fondly on his image. 'I wish I had thetalent. That was carved by a friend of mine, as is now no more. The veryday afore he died, he cut that with his pocket-knife from memory! "I'lldie game," says my friend, "and my last moments shall be dewoted tomaking Dennis's picter." That's it.'

  'That was a queer fancy, wasn't it?' said Mr Tappertit.

  'It WAS a queer fancy,' rejoined the other, breathing on his fictitiousnose, and polishing it with the cuff of his coat, 'but he was a queersubject altogether--a kind of gipsy--one of the finest, stand-up men,you ever see. Ah! He told me some things that would startle you a bit,did that friend of mine, on the morning when he died.'

  'You were with him at the time, were you?' said Mr Tappertit.

  'Yes,' he answered with a curious look, 'I was there. Oh! yes certainly,I was there. He wouldn't have gone off half as comfortable without me. Ihad been with three or four of his family under the same circumstances.They were all fine fellows.'

  'They must have been fond of you,' remarked Mr Tappertit, looking at himsideways.

  'I don't know that they was exactly fond of me,' said Dennis, with alittle hesitation, 'but they all had me near 'em when they departed. Icome in for their wardrobes too. This very handkecher that you see roundmy neck, belonged to him that I've been speaking of--him as did thatlikeness.'

  Mr Tappertit glanced at the article referred to, and appeared to thinkthat the deceased's ideas of dress were of a peculiar and by no means anexpensive kind. He made no remark upon the point, however, and sufferedhis mysterious companion to proceed without interruption.

  'These smalls,' said Dennis, rubbing his legs; 'these very smalls--theybelonged to a friend of mine that's left off sich incumbrances for ever:this coat too--I've often walked behind this coat, in the street, andwondered whether it would ever come to me: this pair of shoes havedanced a hornpipe for another man, afore my eyes, full half-a-dozentimes at least: and as to my hat,' he said, taking it off, and whirlingit round upon his fist--'Lord! I've seen this hat go up Holborn on thebox of a hackney-coach--ah, many and many a day!'

  'You don't mean to say their old wearers are ALL dead, I hope?' said MrTappertit, falling a little distance from him as he spoke.

  'Every one of 'em,' replied Dennis. 'Every man Jack!'

  There was something so very ghastly
in this circumstance, and itappeared to account, in such a very strange and dismal manner, for hisfaded dress--which, in this new aspect, seemed discoloured by the earthfrom graves--that Mr Tappertit abruptly found he was going another way,and, stopping short, bade him good night with the utmost heartiness. Asthey happened to be near the Old Bailey, and Mr Dennis knew there wereturnkeys in the lodge with whom he could pass the night, and discussprofessional subjects of common interest among them before a rousingfire, and over a social glass, he separated from his companions withoutany great regret, and warmly shaking hands with Hugh, and making anearly appointment for their meeting at The Boot, left them to pursuetheir road.

  'That's a strange sort of man,' said Mr Tappertit, watching thehackney-coachman's hat as it went bobbing down the street. 'I don't knowwhat to make of him. Why can't he have his smalls made to order, or wearlive clothes at any rate?'

  'He's a lucky man, captain,' cried Hugh. 'I should like to have suchfriends as his.'

  'I hope he don't get 'em to make their wills, and then knock 'em on thehead,' said Mr Tappertit, musing. 'But come. The United B.'s expect me.On!--What's the matter?'

  'I quite forgot,' said Hugh, who had started at the striking of aneighbouring clock. 'I have somebody to see to-night--I must turn backdirectly. The drinking and singing put it out of my head. It's well Iremembered it!'

  Mr Tappertit looked at him as though he were about to give utterance tosome very majestic sentiments in reference to this act of desertion, butas it was clear, from Hugh's hasty manner, that the engagement was oneof a pressing nature, he graciously forbore, and gave him his permissionto depart immediately, which Hugh acknowledged with a roar of laughter.

  'Good night, captain!' he cried. 'I am yours to the death, remember!'

  'Farewell!' said Mr Tappertit, waving his hand. 'Be bold and vigilant!'

  'No Popery, captain!' roared Hugh.

  'England in blood first!' cried his desperate leader. Whereat Hughcheered and laughed, and ran off like a greyhound.

  'That man will prove a credit to my corps,' said Simon, turningthoughtfully upon his heel. 'And let me see. In an altered state ofsociety--which must ensue if we break out and are victorious--when thelocksmith's child is mine, Miggs must be got rid of somehow, or she'llpoison the tea-kettle one evening when I'm out. He might marry Miggs, ifhe was drunk enough. It shall be done. I'll make a note of it.'