Chapter 42
It was nearing noon and Sara still hadn’t pried herself out of bed. She wondered if perhaps she was experiencing depression, but she doubted it. It had been a long seven years; why start now?
A knock at the door startled her, so she climbed out of bed, threw on a robe, and flipped on the coffee pot on the way to the front door. She secured the robe more securely after looking through the peephole.
“Ellis?” she asked as she opened the door. “How are you?”
“More awake than you, it seems,” he said with a forced smile. “Isn’t this your job, waking me before I’m ready?”
Sara smiled and stepped aside, inviting him in. She prepared two cups of coffee and sat on the couch, noting that Ellis had chosen the chair. She presumed it was to keep a safe distance. It was probably for the best.
“Just not feeling motivated today,” she finally offered.
“I can’t blame you.”
She could feel him studying her, so she silently stared back. Despite his rough exterior following a horrible day of traveling and gunfire, he looked as handsome as ever. She wished she could be more for him, but she wasn’t what he or Lilly needed. He looked away, and she wondered if he had come to the same conclusion.
“Buck says Phil’s going to be alright,” he said after having time to reflect. “I went to see him last night. He wants to go to rehab.”
“That’s good,” Sara said as she sipped her coffee. Then she smiled. “Dr. Buck: sexy artistic doctor.”
“One and the same,” Ellis said. “Any news on Stan?”
“Arthur let him sleep it off in a cell. I want to be angry with him, but I just can’t manage it. He knows he gets violent while drunk; but, after Leslie and what we learned about his father, I guess I can see why he’d want to escape. I’m not happy about it, but I’m not mad either.”
“Is he facing jail time?”
“I don’t know. Arthur’s conflicted on how to handle the situation. He says the Cromwells have suffered enough at their own hands, Melba being the exception. She’s suffering due to the stupidity of her loved ones.” She sighed and drained the last of her coffee. “Arthur might let last night slide provided Stan gets help and signs some documentation about never owning a gun, also provided that none of us press charges.”
“I don’t plan to,” Ellis said, and Sara was relieved to hear it. She had no desire to press charges and doubted Phil would either. She agreed that Stan needed professional help, though.
“There’s something else I wanted to talk to you about.” Ellis said. “Buck came to Anderson as a favor to me. We want to try something on Jake, something that Mandy’s parents wouldn’t let us do for her. It might be nothing, but then...” He stopped, as if he were uncertain that he should finish the statement. “We think it might wake him up, Sara.”
“That’s not possible,” She said defensively, not willing to accept false hope. “Jake might as well be dead, Ellis. There’s nothing you can do that would wake him up. His mind is gone.”
Ellis nodded. “I know. I don’t really understand it either, but Buck does. Rachel’s already given him permission to move forward. He’ll be administering the drug later today.”
Sara debated with Ellis, asking more about this procedure and growing angry that he would be willing to get Rachel’s hopes up for something that obviously wouldn’t work, but Ellis was careful not to give too much detail.
He got up to leave, but then she remembered the Cicada Song photograph and gave him his copy. He studied it and laughed when he noticed the cicada on his collar. It was the first genuine smile she’d seen on him since he returned. He thanked her, told her when to meet at Jake’s house, and left.
For the next half hour Sara simply sat on her couch and thought it over. She came to the conclusion that the procedure wouldn’t work but that she should go anyway. Rachel would likely need a shoulder to cry on.
She tried to put it out of her mind but recalled the old days while showering. She thought of that first accidental kiss outside of her window and then the genuine one in his bedroom. She remembered dandelions. She remembered his kind but bashful grin and the way he laughed. The memories made her smile.
She dried off, rummaged through her dresser drawers, and put on some jeans and an old gray t-shirt. She thought twice about it, however, and changed into a nice dress that she typically only wore to church. She felt silly for dressing up, but something compelled her to do so. She started pulling her hair into a ponytail but stopped. She had time, so she styled it nicely. She refused to admit that she wanted to look her best—just in case. She applied some makeup and studied herself in the mirror, angry with how she looked.
“He’s not waking up,” Sara told herself angrily.
She carefully wiped the tears that briefly appeared and willed herself not to cry. Then she took a deep breath and went to the jewelry box. She put on a cross necklace and, after a pause, gently took the old diamond ring from where it had been since she and Phil started dating. She looked it over and remembered when Jake had given it to her. That was such a long time ago in another life. She took a deep breath and slipped it on—just in case.